Just a curious question - I hope you don't mind.


Best regards,
Ceily

At least the last time we checked they still have the legal "certification" of marriage!  Some people do not even have anyone to say goodmorning to not to talk of girlfriend or boyfriend!

Better having anyone to say goodmorning, but still being able to say good morning to one's own reflection in the mirror than saying goodmorning to a stranger in your bedroom and not being able to say good morning to yourself. I've been single for more than 5 years, it wasn't that bad.

Best regards,
Ceily

Selfishness. 

It's nothing wrong with being selfish as long as it has to do with self-respect.
Maybe you think you don't deserve a man on your own.

Best regards,
Ceily

Homosexuality was never meant to be, Some people feel that there are some things that they can do and not get punished for, afterall there are places in the world that allow homosexuality right??, WRONG, HOMOSEXUALITY IS WRONG!!!!!!, If it was not so it would be possible for JUST two men to have a biological child, God would have made

I am not sure if homosexuality is a personal decision and I wouldn't say that it is wrong in every case. Some people are both, male and female. What would you advise them? Such people should stay alone?

Best regards,
Ceily

Hhhm, I don't think that children feel confortable in homosexual marriages. No, I don't like the idea. In addition I wonder why somebody who is homosexual want to have kids.

Best regards,
Ceily

Mothers tend to be overconcerned sometimes. I don't think that you really can convince her that you will find a partner after graduating. I would just tell her as friendly as possible that this is your life and that she has to trust you that you will find your way. These are HER concerns and you should not suffer because your mother is not willing to let her sorrows go. Your mother has to learn that you are grown up now.

Best regards,
Ceily

Why don't you force your wife and your children to come to Nigeria and live with you and behave like a resposible family does? You are the head of your familiy and you have a family. You should take care that everything is alright. I am quite flabbergasted about this strange habit in Africa to live separately from wife and children. You should stay together.

Regards,
Ceily

Oh yes, he misses her alright. the laundry, meals (special ones if he is diabetic ot hypertensive), nursing(if he is on medication), what do you think they mean when they say they miss their wives? Romance?

Lol. Some men are like that, not only in Africa, here in Europe, too. In an earlier posting I told about my grandfather who was an adulterer. My grandmother divorced from him and he had a second wife. The second wife died before him (in my opinion because she had to suffer too much because of my grandfather). So guess what he did as soon his second wife was burried: he called my grandmother asking her if she would marry him again. 

The whole family was very amused. My father asked him why he wanted my grandmother back. His answer was: because she has a driving license.

But people are different, men and women, black and whites. There are childish self-centered people, and there are responsible serious people everywhere. If my husband would die before me I would miss him because he is part of me. And I hope that I am part of him, too.

Bye,
Ceily

i am well. Very well. I mean come on, There's nothing bad with open marriage. Just stick to the godamn rules and you'll both enjoy it. There's a movie on it. I cant remeber the name. But that movie is good.

Real life is not a movie, even in the USA.  

An interesting fact indeed, among the elderly in Nigeria , people prefer the man to die before the wife because in cases where the wife died before the man , the man soon followed, especially if he is not rich enough to attract the attention of another woman.

You mean that the widower do not follow because he is missing his wife but because he do not want to do the laundry alone  ?

Kind regards,
Ceily

That's a ridiculous question. I am a Christian and I can imagine that there is life in universe out there. God is big, why not? And why not sending Jesus to another planet, too?

Maybe an alien civilization could tell us more about god, maybe not. Maybe my cat knows more about god than myself 

Bye bye,
Ceily

Hi,

I agree that there are a lot of ideologies, statements and arguments that confuses people and make them a wrong leader follow.  Those confusions serve all the same purpose: money, money, money. Unfortunately so called Christian preachers do not make an exception as Jesus has foreseen during his life. Meanwhile I get stomachache if a preacher collects money, not because I do not want to spend it but because I am asking myself if I can trust him.

So I learned that the only recipe against wrong ideologies is to have none. I believe in Jesus Christ. My experiences make it impossible to deny him. But not everbody made thosed experiences and therefore I cannot damn people who don't believe. I think that one day everybody will have come to him, one after the other. Things are like they are, I cannot change them if I think and think and think.

Therefore I try not to let any ideology digging in my mind, not to condemn and not to glorify somebody or something. I am too small to know everything. 
If you want to know to much you are a perfect victim for a wrong ideology.

Best regards,
Ceily

German/German marriages are also subject to divorces. As I already wrote - and I am sure you know that statistics - every 3rd marriage is supposed to break, no matter if German/German or German/whatever.

Tschuess,
Ceily

An interesting fact: in average a unmarried woman lives a few years longer than a married woman. In contradiction a married man lives longer than a unmarried man. Indeed there still seems to be a unbalanced situation between what a woman has to carry and what a man has to carry in their lives (no matter which colour one's skin has  ).

*Tschuess*,
Ceily

Hi,

I am new here. I am a white German woman married to a black Nigerian man. We live in Germany and
I can only speak for this country. According to statistics every third marriage is divorced here. As I see it the lack of believe in God in Germany causes a lot of trouble in personal relationships.

First of all I must say that not only women are the ones breaking with their marriages, also men do. In fact I think men are even worse.

People in Germany, especially students or young graduates tend to marry for the wrong reasons. These may be:

- they do not want to live alone
- marriage may be a status symbol and empowers their careers
- financial reasons
- they want to have children
- especially women want to have all their romantic dreams fullfilled
- they are afraid to end as an old maid
- homosexuals want to hide their sexual intention

Then one day he/she meets the woman/man of his/her dreams and the old partner is not interesting any more.  In my opinion this a very unfair behaviour as one part is left with broken dreams. So I think it is very important to marry only for one reason: love.

Another reason for high divorce rate is stubbornness and pride. Some people are willing to fight until a bitter end if some trouble occurs , even if it costs their soul and they find theirselves left alone in a single appartment.

It is a pity that believing in god is that unpopular here, sometimes it needs a lot of courage to say loud that you believe in god and in Jesus Christ. Even some esoteric beliefs are more popular 

However please consider that everything has two sides. The other side you can find in more traditional countries is that two people have to stuck together no matter how bad a marriage is as their tradition do not tolerate a divorce. My grandfather was a bad adulterer and my grandma was one of the first women in town who demanded a divorce (and did it). Imagine how she had to suffer because people were talking about her. Times have changed very quickly

*Tschuess* from Germany,
Ceily