Yall do stuff like this and more yet still have the mount to count body count for women and blame them having sex with men.

It’s been a long time since I last considered the average naija a dude as ppl with common sense and everyday on this forum you guys keep proving it. Because everything you do in contradictory to what you say

superCleanworks:


Keep playing.

I have seen this happen like twice in my life.

the first one was not marriage. The guy took drinks and people to the babes father's house for introduction and wedding plans. na so the babe begin sleep, wash, cook, clean house for my guy till the guy went back to the UK and she had no idea till weeks later.

The second one was full marriage and a brand new house. He sold the house while they were away on honeymoon. Told her to get back to naija while he finish a business deal. She came back to NOTHING.

pweeryambre:

I know a banker friend of mine that did it, he even went as far as printing wedding cards and pre wedding photos. I still have their pre wedding photos. he called it off right before they started sharing the cards after insisting he wants her to get pregnant before they wed.

laplace19:

I've seen it happen in Onitsha. Though the guy only took some fake elders to go pay the girl's bride price. They came back together and after sleeping with the girl, he told her straight up that he is not marrying her. He own did it because she was forming hard to get for him(the guy na rich business guy)

bestman09:
The story may not be fake.
I witnessed something like this many years ago. Someone hired his neighbors in his face me i slap you resident and a few friends to pose as relations and took them to the lady's parents with drinks saying that he wants to marry their daughter and when everything was fixed, even the date, the young man disappeared after sleeping with the lady, which is what he actually wanted. He told his friends that the lady proved too much stubborn to him hence such expensive act.

There’s someone for everyone

Very necessary. I hope they don’t restore his account. What a foolish undertaking

radautoworks:
you did the turkey neck!!

Yes

Thank you!

Biglittlelois:
Believe me, the reason why this thread has not reached 20 pages is because the percentage of people supporting the Op is far greater than those supporting the husband.

you know it!

Flip it any other way and they would have come together here to call women everything but children of God

Barteze:

Husband and wife ought to unit in marriage as one.

That’s my belief too. I don’t know if you’re familiar with my posts on this forum but I’m a strong advocate for joint ownership.

It’s the way that men have shown they are more than comfortable leaving their women vulnerable to the grifters and outside world that’s hurts my heart.

How can you be comfortable leaving the person you claim to love exposed to hostile circumstances when you can easily do the right thing from the start

Mid spring harvest last couple weeks

I just eat the sugar snap peas straight off the vine with some peanut butter. So good

Cornbread and smoked turkey neck collard green

What Israel is doing is creating more militant youth who having lost everything in this ethnic cleanse will not only be willing to die for the cause but take whoever is the way with them

iLegendd:
I hate how innocent Palestinians are paying for what Hamas did. Honestly, when this war is over and another group with Hamas' ideology forms, it will take them 100 or 200 years to think of attacking Isreal again because they know the repercussion from history.

safariman:


Since the properties and bank accounts used in building the property are in Nigeria, subpoenas can only be served or effective with a bank that has a representative in UK/US and not on a Nigerian bank. Your suggestion will be the wife going to court in case of divorce for asset disclosures.

But he didn’t earn it in naira. That money was probably in a hidden account there in uk before he transferred it into a Nigerian bank account for the project.

It can depend on where you live.

I’ve never been a part of any toxic abroad community. In fact it’s been hard to even come across Nigerians in some of the places I’ve lived. At least not enough to create a big community with.

Now I’m in northern California and there are tons of Nigerians here. But get this, everyone is a professional and has a lot to lose if they were to engage in detrimental behaviors. So the community here is above board and everyone respects themselves

Thanks for being open minded at least

Hopefully they won’t label you a SIMP for it

Tallesty1:
Why are you people intentionally ignoring the man's chaotic family? What if he dies and they accuse her of killing him? Strip her of all his wealth and send her packing or are we going to pretend it doesn't happen? How about they divorce, he will now walk away with her investments? I thought we all stan Hakimi because we are good people, didn't know it was because he is a male.

30 minutes of me seeing things from the woman's angle and I feel totally drained. Nawa ooo

Are we on the same topic? Were talking about their property in Nigeria.

Since when did marriage grant women 50/50 ownership of the family property?

I’m really interested to know. Because if true and it’s actually enforced, then kudos.

Idaytesj29:


The marriage alone validates her as a 50% shareholder on all properties in her Husband's name, whether she contributed or not. Why the sudden need to make it black and white, is someone preparing for divorce?

This abroad sef......always bringing the real you in our women.
In Nigeria where she may not be able to add any penny to family properties, will she still feel unsafe and ask that her name be there cos the man's chaotic families will still be alive and well though.

maasoap:


Na so una go use your sentiments and mindset tear this beautiful family apart? Una well done o

Well Let him just transfer the all properties to her name alone and leave things that way.

If he can’t do that, then we’re not the ones tearing any family apart. You guys love lies and manipulation and hate when you get called out for it. Then someone is breaking up the family. The family can only be held together when the woman is being treated like a lesser human. That’s the only condition that makes some of you men happy

maasoap:


You are trying too hard BTW, marriage is not for everyone, stay out of it and its discuss

This we can agree on

Marriage isn’t for everyone.
And especially the type of marriage where the man thinks it’s okay to sideline his woman and make dubious moves on his own to keep the woman at his mercy. It’s definitely not for me or anyone I love who listens to me.

Not for us! Y’all can keep it

shaybebaby:

From where? He's structured the whole thing that she would have to get past legal hurdles in that country plus go through his chaotic family.

You have strength ooo. Me I no Do, I'll consider it a small price to pay to learn I'm sharing a life with a thief.

I’m thinking from whatever assets they have there in the uk. But honestly I don’t know how the system works; I’m thinking more from a USA angle. Your spouse can legally owe you whatever money they hid away to spend in another country. They don’t even need his permission to find it; the bank will provide the information when court ordered.

It’s obviously a legal battle but unless it’s a small amount of money, I won’t just let him have it.

subcbouy:
These people aren't telling us anything! Who removed the money from her account? EFCC shouldn't seat there and expect to be called or reported for something like this! So if she hadn't shouted or not being popular, the money wouldn't have been reversed.

yep

A regular person would have had a hard time getting it back

I’m happy for her. A closed mouth doesn’t get fed

jaxxy:


I know this fruit but does it have any health benefits or its just about the sweet taste?

Vitamin C.

Plus other minerals

Klass99:


I can't stop laughing🤣.

😩I wasn’t even trying to be funny. I don’t know how my brain produces those phrases

Barteze:

Once a man gets married everything he has whether gotten before the marriage or while married belongs to his wife too. But I can understand the lady's fear the level of entitlement of Nigerians these days especially family members is out of this world.

Actually that’s not true. Only the things he got while married belong to him and his wife. Pre marital property is for him alone or any kids he might have in the future

shaybebaby:

Tbh, it's unlikely she's going to see a dime back of what she contributed.

Most likely he did it on purpose..to have something to hold over her. I'd cut my losses..not point in throwing good money after bad.

I wouldn’t cut my losses. I’d take the equivalent of whatever my share is of those investments in one way or another. Then he gotta go.

I don’t like dubious partners

So then he should transfer every property to her name and exclude himself since they are legally married and he has nothing to worry about.

That’s would be okay. Right?

I don’t know if you think you’re talking to another one of your fellow grey matter deficient scallywags

Fuckyoumod:
why are you lying?
For them to be living as husband and wife in UK it means they are legally married.

Everything he owns automatically belongs to his legally married wife and children by law.

So why is she worried and trying to demonize the man? What's wrong if a wife contributes for the growth of her home and husband?

The way you people hate men so much eeh.... God will punish all of you. You people forgot that you are nothing but just SPERM in the balls of a man.

Actually if she starts now she can get what’s rightfully hers whether she goes gun blazing or not.

The man might think the houses in Nigeria are protected from UK government fingers but if they are anything like the USA, his bank statements can be subpoenaed and all the money he squirreled away to build those projects in Nigeria can be re-estimated and he’ll owe her half of it if he wants to keep the properties to himself. That way she get her share and he can go live in Nigerian mansions by himself since that’s what he wants 🤨

michlins:
ok she should simply fight her husband now and fight for the properties too in court.

The mistake is already made, the best approach shouldn't be a warpath with the husband but a subtle but defined tactics to get what she wants.

If she goes guns blazing, she will get next to nothing now but if she gets smart, she will get her home and properties too.

But who says the man will die first. What if she dies before the man

shaybebaby:

It's the "gently" that landed her in this predicament.

yep. Give an inch they take a mile

Only a man will see another man being a bad spouse and ask those he’s hurting to walk on egg shells around him so as not to displease him. Meanwhile he’s in the wrong from the beginning.

No wonder Nigerian women hate to build with you people. I always think in my head, “why would a woman want to keep her money separate from the spouse. Is it not one family and they can all be included and benefit from it equally?”

But no. Not with these types of responses. If he decides to go ahead and marry another woman to reap where the OP sowed, the best advice you guys can give her is to keep begging him.

I won’t blame any woman who doesn’t want to build with you guys. Egomaniacal double crossing is the game y’all play

edmasta01:


You seem to be a good woman who is supportive of your husband and you and hubby probably have a good relationship already and this is now threatening that relationship.

Can I ask, how did you approach him about adding your name to the investment document? I hope you did not make mention of the fact that his family is chaotic? No man will take lightly if you use style or subtly make snide comments about his family (even if it's true).

If you did approach this respectfully, I will advise that you reach out to your hubby again and let him know that for your peace of mind, you'd want a situation where you want Mr Joe Bloggs and Mrs Mary Bloggs are listed as owners of a property or investment that you are both committing money to.

If he then insists that he won't do that, then just let him know in that meeting that henceforth, you won't be contributing jointly as you "feel" alienated.

Then let him know you'd want to suggest that you invest separately so that you both can have that peace of mind. If he gets angry, don't flinch. At some point, he will come back to his sense (if he is a good man).

Don't try to invest behind his back (unless you are ready to see shege in your marriage).

I live in the UK, and I can tell you, it's very hard to manage a family on your own if you divorce in this UK. Don't take a harsh action because you want to prove your right.

Use communication and at least, if you don't agree on the joint name, at least you both still have a marriage with segregated investment plans.

Look at the type of coddling we are advocating for a man who’s being deliberately sly to his lady.
She should gently carry him along 😒

folla:
Continue to gently ask him to include your name in your joint property, while going forward you buy property in your own name and carrying him along.

Don't buy any property in your name without keeping him in confidence, so he knows you don't have hidden agenda. If he asks why you're doing this, let him know you're doing this for your children and your own future.

Cheers.

Kobojunkie:
What about the woman? Why would or does she not know this too?

sometimes we lie to ourselves to protect our hearts from breaking. She might already know and that’s why she is here looking for someone to tell her that she’s wrong and her husband could never. Yet he absolutely can and is already doing it to her face.

If not, this topic won’t even be on NL. The moment the man noticed his wife is not being included in property that is being purchased with family funds, he should have fixed the issue immediately before she even had time to complain. So I think she knows

I promise you that man knows. That’s his intention

Odotech:
Your husband is investing in Nigeria because he knows Nigeria is a lawless place where should both of you divorce today, you will get nothing from the courts. Courts here pervert justice. But if it was in UK he invested, whether he puts your name or not, the properties belong to you both except you had prenuptial agreement. He may have his fear of losing out if divorced for insisting on investing here in Nigeria. You too have the fear of losing out because of his choice of a lawless country as investment destination. The middle point should have been investing in Nigeria under you both's full legal name ie Mrs Jane Sobotie and Mr Jude Sobotie. In law, "Mr and Mrs Jude Sobotie" is not recognized name. Tell him to put your name or henceforth forget about investment in Nigeria. Support only joint investment in UK where you have automatic right to any property in his own name or invest in your own name here in Nigeria if he refuses to include you in the existing properties. Make him understand that you know and understand his fears is about losing it all through divorce but that Nigerian courts and systems are already biased towards men in the event of divorce, so your legal name must be included. Should he relocate to Nigeria tomorrow or secretly marry another Nigerian woman, she automatically inherits properties built with your money because your name is not on those documents. Nigerian law recognizes not just court marriages but also customary marriages so your own properties will be shared between you and the secret wife of your husband. You seem like a good woman. The type most of us would like to have really. You appear supportive and not interested in divorcing your man like we read about Nigerian women dealing with their husbands in the UK

ihavesense:

Do you know that as a lawfully wedded wife, she and the man’s children have a right to inheritance of his wealth. So why the fuss.

So then there’d be no fuss if the woman puts all the family wealth and property in her name right? After all if she dies, the man is entitled to everything she owns. No?

These are the sick devilish lies you used to deceive women in the past so they’d build with y’all and when you start misbehaving they won’t have a choice to stick with your miserable behinds seeing as they have no other choice

Harddiskng:
You would discover all those advising op to start her investment separately are all women.

I don’t know why when women advise women but matrimonial things, it is the one that would scatter the home pata-pata they always advised their fellow woman to do.

I still haven’t figured it out whether it is subconscious or intentional

But you have nothing to say about a man who’s intentionally excluding his wife from jointly owned family property. All you people love is to cheat and oppress your women. Anyone who gives them advice on how to avoid being mistreated like this becomes the enemy

Aren’t you a whole tub of stupidity?

seanery:
Soo far she is happy..., and the gbola is big and curve; no lele