₦airaland Forum

Aizebioje: that's because these so called equalists won't blow the trumpets when a lady is involved. Some women are sooo wicked they'd give bros Adolf a run for his money

you must be very intelligent....you get my drift!

byvan: Coogar you are making being hitched sound like an acheivement.Every lady at some point in her life must have had the chance to get hitched but some chose not to,so why the desperation?or is it simply to make it plausible that stolen waters taste better?

in our world today, being hitched is the greatest achievement a woman can have. i would say it's more valuable than any degree you copped in school. this is nigeria we are talking about - where single women are openly discriminated against and they are almost treated like 2nd-class citizens.....

take a look at this glorious advice from a supposed role model....

http://misspetitenigeria..co.uk/2013/02/if-married-man-makes-you-happygo-for-it.html?m=1

byvan: @Amelian, don't get me wrong,men cannot be blameless,they are only blameless in coogar's theory .

Really some don't mind sharing,how do you explain people intentionally winding up as second wives and permanent concubines?

be thankful you are already hitched, to the ones out there still searching, anything goes......

ibkaye: Yeah that's definitely often the case when it comes to Nigeria, lol, though I was speaking generally

if you are speaking generally especially in the UK/US, then the woman has the ultimate power......a man would be very stüpid to cheat here unless he's got his arsë covered up. naija men who can't keep their zippers up do not marry abroad, they marry in nigeria so no feminist law can make them cough out 50% of their assets......

biolabee: @coogar I get your points though but like byvan said, some guys prey on vulnerable single girls

don't be deceived, there's no vulnerable single woman out there. if a single woman uses the same aggression she deploys to fend off okada men and bus conductors on the rich married men, there would be no infidelity.....

however, the moment they see range evoque with alloy-rims, the angry smirk becomes smiles.....

Amelian: Am sorry , I sound brazen but its the truth.... Have seen a scenario, true life, where the lover outside , made the wife at home run mad, killed two of her kids diabolically...how about that? The issue is... Wives do your best to make your husbands happy at home and also be prayerful...
There's another scenario, my nephew says he Must marry two wives and no one can stop him from doing so...I was like, u r joking with your life o.... He says , no woman can do him anything... And that's how he wants to live his life... A wife in nija and a white wife abroad...with such distance , how will the women know? He smiled smugly.... I just shook my head ...
Also , our family lawyer a guy confides in me that he has 4 wives in different states in Nigeria.... And none of his wives, know themselves...he was laughing , as he was narrating how he successfully married them and always seeing each one ,with his children scattered all around nija .... in the guise of traveling for buisness, all the time...as long there's food on their table, school fees are been paid , what else does the first wife want? ...or other wives want?....so he's trying ....he says to himself and to me, smiling sunnily.... I looked in dismay and shook my head again.

you must be having a laugh....
for every scenario like this you have seen/heard, more runz girls have died, lost a limb or have acid thrown at them. just like you have bad girls on the outside is the way you have wives that were once gangsters and retired cultists! it's the survival of the baddest and in nigeria, the woman with the money & power usually wins.

the madams at home are generally richer and more powerful. who's a cult girl to a madam that can pay hired assassins to get rid of a roach? you really think all those lifeless bodies in lagos were victims of ritualism or car accidents? more than 50% of them were killed for messing with married men...

byvan: No wonder coogar blamed the ladies 100% for being their own worst enemy but certainly the men are not blameless in the mess.

the desperation to become mrs somebody or having a man call them every evening are enough reasons for single women to date married men. men are the victims here.

adaobi123: You're living in a cave mate

i wish....
at least, in the caves i might get to see violent women unlike out there where only men are the beasts/monsters....

bellong: I have read a lot cases for saying no. Not only jealousy.
I am not insinuating that men in general are monsters but some can get that desperate. Records speak volume of such

and women cannot get desperate? i want to see these records of yours....

ibkaye: Sad as it is, even so, I'm not saying it would be completely detrimental, just that the married cheat generally has more to lose than the singleton, man or woman

i doubt that in the nigerian factor - polygamy is an option open to nigerian men. men with more than one wife started with infidelity before they brought the 2nd, 3rd and 4th wives home.....

the girls have more to lose - most of the time, they are the ones the madams go after. we have seen or heard of the madams ganging up on the single girls and beating them to stupor!

adaobi123: What you haven't seen, doesn't mean it doesn't exist.....

I'm gonna take your comment as sarcasm.

You're telling me that you've never read about a violent woman before. I'm just confused now.

But then the woman in question may be sick and mentally challenged.

never ever....
women are the subtle beings, men are the brutish violent monsters. the women you have seen committing violent crimes did sex change surgery - they used to be men.

ibkaye: His marriage, wife, kids (if he has any) etc compared to the single woman. If you're going to cheat, do it with someone who has as much to lose as you lol

the average nigerian man has nothing to lose.... the society encourages the men to do as they please. the single woman has also been liberated lately......her acts have been glorified. it's no longer pröstitution, it's now runz

adaobi123: ^^^
I thought the same too.

have you ever seen a violent nigerian woman? our peaceful and loving nigerian women? every single offence women have committed in nigeria is because of the nigerian men.

ibkaye: The married man has more to lose, they're still both at fault

how so, officer ibkaye?

bellong: I didn't make it up. If you do read Nigerian newspaper online, you would have read cases of where guys killed ladies for saying no to their advances or in some cases poured acid on them.
That is how bad it can get for some men who do not take NO for an answer.

they didn't kill the ladies/poured acid for saying no - they normally do those in cases of jealousy or when the ladies are suspected to be cheating/have cheated.....

telling me cases of räpe/murder would be higher if there's no infidelity is blasphemous. you are directly saying men in general are monsters and are irrational animals without sex!

alutacontinua: She might be insane...you never can tell. A lady did same for my dad sometimes ago, he practically had to show me to the lady to prove to her that she's highly mistaken. And to say the lady was still asking me if the spirit of God was lying.
My point: she might have a bit of delusional disorder.

delusional? insanity? madness?
abeg, there's nothing wrong with these ladies - how come the poor folks never get this lucky with having heaven-sent women running after them? these women are not insane, they are just desperate....

@op, both the men and the ladies have blames in this situation.

for me, women take 100% of the blame.....

byvan: Lol at Ramsey's heaven sent 2nd wife,no doubt girls are desperate though but some definitely are victims,please be fair.

men are the victims......
girls are very desperate. using what they have to get what they want. they populate most cafes and bars to seduce men that are either tipsy or dead-drunk. there's no spin in this one - women hold the key in infidelity. a resounding no kills any infidelity on the spot!

byvan: Hahahaha,i would have 6years ago ,i verified manually

how did you verify? fasting and praying or voodoo?

byvan: Suitors verified via Google in Naija ? ? Do we have such database? I haven't heard of it,that ll be a welcome development.Do mean that the meat seller down the street can be verified by Google in Nigeria?

that's exactly the point.....
these girls don't go for the meat-sellers or the bus conductors, they go for bankers, engineers and stockbrokers, etc.

if you have any successful suitor asking you out, print his name here and i would tell you everything about him under 24 hours.

byvan: I really think that the lecherous married men and the poaching young ladies are both to blame.In this case,the cheating married man is the most despicable of the two,he made the vows to be loyal to one woman,the LovePeddler didn't.

the girls mostly have boyfriends they are cheating on as well........why do you think they call themselves "runs girls". they keep glorifying pröstitution to make themselves feel cool and when they are caught, they quickly blame the men.....as if they are suddenly brainless and cannot discern what's right from wrong....

byvan: Are the young married ones on default settings since taking the vows to give off signal that says "I am married"?

in this day and age of information technology?
a simple google search or facebook search would reveal all you need to know about any suitor. naija babes know these men are married but the greed would not let them reason.....

byvan: Apart from the pot bellied and the Grey haired who appear obviously married,what of the young married men in their 20s and early thirties?

nigerian women still know they are married but they maliciously play along. it's all about the money, greed and XXXXL throat-size.

no one is spinning any lies or trying to exempt any of the willing culprits,but keeping the blame one sided seems a little sentimental

it's not sentimental, we know what naija girls are capable of. only last night, i was watching ramsey nouah's interview and he told a story of a stalker that went to his house and claimed God told her she should become ramsey nouah's 2nd wife. she went there with all her properties and stayed outside the gate for 3 days until police had to come & remove her.

she's not mad, neither is she stüpid - she's one of the many naija babes determined to ruin the marriage of another man using her religion as a smoke screen!

Dantedasz: Or the husband did it and blackmailed his wife to admit guilt.
Women are NEVER violent and can not be violent.
This man is guilty some way!
LOL.

he's 100% guilty! the woman should be set free. her husband should go to jail.

byvan: From coogar's theory,married men are like goats being led to the slaughter house ,presumely devoid of any sense of reasoning to resist being killed by their captor.Tell me you are kidding!

don't misinterpret my comments - married men are not goats. they go about their daily lives innocently until they come in contact with the evil women that are determined to break marriages!

I wonder how we are going to categorize married men that always maintain the single status outside their homes,am talking of those who poach on innocent young girls that are genuinely seeking for love with a single guy.

this is a lie....
girls know the men that are married and the ones who aren't married. they just pretend to play along. you want to tell me all those grey-haired pot-bellied chiefs are single or are under-25s? come on - spin another lie, you might be able to convince me.

bellong: As much as I do agree with you that if the receptor refuses the advances, it kills the cycle. However, if the initiator too can control his libido and respect his marital vows, there will not be any cycle in the first place.

the single most important factor is - the receptor determines whether there's going to be infidelity or not. they are the determinants!

If the lady keeps saying no, I am sure, there will be increased cases of rape and murder rape from men who think only with that thing in between their legs.

this is atrocious...... so the reason there's been less räpe crimes is because of infidelity? hahahahaha - talk about shooting one's foot. this your point has more holes than a village basket.

Yes, I agree that the ladies should take blame for accepting offers from married men. I also agree that married men should be responsible enough to keep to their marital vows and stop chasing after everything in skirt.

what the married men are doing is irrelevant - people don't blame the godfathers of armed robbers when caught? people don't blame the imams of boko haram suspects - why should the married men get the blame for what adult women are doing? these female adults cannot think for themselves or they are hungry and greedy?

In summary, I agree that individuals should be responsible for his/her actions without shifting blame on another. My initial post was to condemn the wives who put the blame strictly on the get away ladies while absolving their husbands of the blame.

because the men are the victims....
how come these lecherous girls don't go out with oil-soaked auto-mechanics? how come they don't run after palmwine tappers or vulcanisers? this shows the women pick their targets carefully and poach them like a hunter does a gazelle.

in our nigeria today, women are the most likely to get diabolical to poach married men. they patronise spiritualists and witchdoctors from all nooks and cranny of the country. they are the ones that use love potion to bedazzle the oblivious married men who then fall into their traps. married men are the victims so their wives are within their rights to go for the husband-poachers!

bellong: The beginning of any cycle begins with the initiator. If the men do not initiate the cycle, there will be no way for the ladies to satisfy their selfish urge. Why would I blame someone who sits on her own before an external force came to disturb her inertia

the beginning of any cycle begins with the receptor. the initiator does not know if he would succeed or not. some women have stopped married men on their tracks and the married men did not succeed. if every girl acts that way, there would be no infidelity.....

women cannot continue to hang on to the excuse that the married men is to blame. i have also been approached by drug traffickers, human traffickers, boko haram, kidnappers to take part in the evil. i rejected the offers outrightly. can i make an excuse if i join them and get caught?

bellong: If we are going to start this argument, it will lead nowhere. In my submission, I wrote THEY ARE ADULTS, ITS A MUTUAL ACT. In as much as you want to stand in defense of the flirtatious men, I chose to put the blame at their doorstep.
It is no secret that its men that normally kick start such cycle of infidelity. How are men mostly victims of infidelity? Please educate me on that statement.

men don't kick-start any cycle of infidelity. the power to say yes or no is with the woman. the woman having considered the cuteness, wealth and the manners of the suitor, then agrees to sleep wïth the married man. if every woman says no regardless of the pressure heaped on their shoulders, there would be no infidelity....

men are the victims - they are always at the mercy of the women except in the case of räpe - which is a crime!

Meanwhile, the man too was not forced at gunpoint to lay the gluttonous single lady.

and i am saying the intentions of the married man is irrelevant as he still has to wait for the decision of a woman before infidelity can be established. if women treat all the married men asking them out like they shout at bus conductors, there would be no infidelity!

biolabee: The cougar.. Always bringing the last angle...Hahahahhaha
Why do you want to absolve the man

i am absolving the men because women have always gotten away with playing the victim in marital infidelity....they are the culprits every time. if they don't agree to the requests of these married men, can there be infidelity?

bellong: The promiscuous lady is not the problem but the husband. They are adults, its a mutual act. I do not belong to the school of thought of castigating ladies dating married men. If the men never asked them out, will there be opportunity for them to date?

Except by diabolical means, no man run after a lady without an intense hunger and test for lust in his heart. The wife at home better direct her prayers to the source of the problem (her husband).

how's the promiscuous lady not the problem? was she forced at gunpoint to sleep wïth a married man? unless you are saying women are idiotic zombies who jump at every offer presented to them, your comment is flawed in principle. instead of you to address the hunger and the greed of these ladies, you are putting the blame at the doorstep of the married men - who are mostly the victims of marital infidelity!

superstar1: Oga, direct your questions to your governors.

Stop crying wolf where there is none. Lagos state indigenes that are miscreants were also arrested in the past and we all applauded it. Akwa I on n katsina made appropriate transportation for their indigenes. What were your governors looking at for 90days.

don't mind that simpleton!
lagos state went to akwa ibom to pick up 2 of their destitutes. anambra cannot go to lagos and pick 14 of theirs, they had no arrangement to receive them and peter obi is whining like a bïtch after he's failed the people of his state.....

if there are sensible members in the house of rep, peter obi should be facing an impeachment as we speak! he's failed the people that voted him into power. incompetent, moronic governor.

muktarl: go through my post. i left niger state 6years ago to the east. my father own trailers. am presently sokoto road, onitsha. tomorrow we are going to ph to do offload. so how are mine so suppose to know the ibos if now by living among them.

shut up and stop lying....
your credibility is in tatters - you lie about everything! how are we even sure you are not from niger republic or perhaps, a member of boko haram!

your father married women from 4 different states - who is he? king solomon? only you claiming niger, osun, jigawa, kano and anambra??

thomason: ahahahahaha. In fact, you gonna be champion in lying competition. woooooow

muktarl epitomises all that is wrong with nigeria. he's not even proud of where he is from. muktarl is a disgrace to the umbilical cord that fed him as a foetus and he's equally a disgrace to the village that birthed him.

muktarl: if your father marries four wives and they are from different state, don't you have stake in those states? let me tell you my father married 4wives. one from osun, jigawa, minna and kano. at least my earlier post have shown you that at least am not ibo. i have commented against the ibo before.

tell that to the army of lunatics that are empty-minded like you. if your mother is from osun and your father is from niger, how the fück are you from jigawa?

osun + niger = jigawa?

you are a pathological liar, a fraud, the worst verminous cretin one can ever come across. i have more respect for the destitutes fashola sent back to anambra, at least they had dignity and they were proud of where they came from.

muktarl: go through my posts. my father alhaji.....is from niger state, while my mother is from osun state. my mother is equally a moslem.

so how do you explain this comment?

https://www.nairaland.com/1049655/bandits-loose-imo/1#12203653

muktarl: Am not saying this because am from Jigawa. But in all honesty Imo state has become Somalia and Afghanistan of Nigeria where lawlessness, kidnapping, criminality, insecurity has taken a very deep root. To be sincere Kaduna and Maiduguri are much more safer than what is happening on daily basis in IMO state. To the extent people are going around with fear of being killed. Me thing FG need to declare a state of emergency in imo state.

you are a fraud - you have no identity!!!

muktarl: dig all you want it does not change my paternity- niger state

you are a pathological liar suffering from an identity crisis. did you not tell us you were from jigawa state?

muktarl: ^
Am not saying this because am from Jigawa. But in all honesty Imo state has become Somalia and Afghanistan of Nigeria where lawlessness, kidnapping, criminality, insecurity has taken a very deep root. To be sincere Kaduna and Maiduguri are much more safer than what is happening on daily basis in IMO state. To the extent people are going around with fear of being killed. Me thing FG need to declare a state of emergency in imo state.

muktarl: which SW? stop mentioning SW, but lagos. because as i told you earlier there is no real ibo man in those rural towns you mentioned outside lagos. my problem with yourobas is that they don't travel. i used to have this your type of mentality until i traveled to onitsha and enugu.

you must be smoking your own pubic hair...
the igbos in Ibadan, osogbo and abeokuta outnumber the most populous igbo state in the SE? are you high on pawpaw leaves? which village is devoid of the igbos in nigeria? they don't stay in their states, the soil is not good for agriculture and the cities are largely underdeveloped!

they are far more developed and organized. they only use the north and SW as commercial battle field afterwards they will push the money to the east. we did haulage for ibeto alot, i went to his house in nnewi, i was ashamed of being a northerner. ibos are smart, take or leave it.

igbo states are the least developed in nigeria. they have nothing. their governors are playing with the advantage that a chunky fraction of their citizens are not even residents of the state!