₦airaland Forum

ilawanson44:
Chai! From DG to acting!

BREAKING NEWS!

DSS discovers the drink which is making the Daura Dullarddd behave like a Slowpoke!

The men of the State Security Service have discovered an alchoholic beverage which President Mumuhadu Buhari consumes everyday which makes him act slow and unresponsive since his assumption of office.

The discovery was made last night after a tip off by the new DSS acting DG which prompted the men of the SSS to storm the Aso Rock home of Dullardhino and caught him drinking the said alcoholic drink while Dullardhino was breaking his fast after the ramadan prayers.

The beer was confiscated and taken to the DSS headquarters.

This development was said to have angered Daura Dullardd which made him re-appoint the DG to a mere acting DG!

Daura is a very powerful beer which is brewed in the bushes of Daura in Kastina State which is used in Hypnotizing and making both humans and animals lousy! The beer is said to even be strong enough to make very fast cars like Ferrari, Lamborghini and Porsche travel at a maximum slow speed of 3km per hour when poured into their fuel tank.

APC reacts....

Meanwhile, the All Progressives Party has dismissed the actions of the DSS as a ploy to tarnish the image of the President. Speaking with news men in a telephone conversation, the spokesperson for the party Liar Mohammed insisted that the said beer was Guilder which the label was removed and another "Photoshopped" label tagged Daura was attached to the bottle.

"It is a setup! I know buhari very well...he drinks Guilder which is his favorite beer that he uses in breaking his fast" Lair Mohammed told our journalists.

Attempts to reach the former DG for DSS who has been currently demoted to a mere acting DG because of this development was said to have been unsuccessful as his line was switched off!

SOURCE: Taatafo News!

Emekamex:
.

EasternPride:
Nigeria is helpless against today's Biafra.

Biafra is a spirit, it is an ideology and our religion, we worship Chukwu Abiama with the truth.

That's why we still saying, either Biafra comes, or somalia will be paradise compared to the zoo.

If Biafra doesn't come, every single soul on this zoo will die.

anonimi:
Na so when you have person wey sabi nor be the one wey dem abandon for West Germany doormouth



www.nairaland.com/attachments/2554105_meme0627628374_jpeg3e5340169a11db7d4a40dccddcedf336

Coolcash1:
To all you ethnic bigot painting my write up as tribal driven really need to look beyond your nose. Mind you, I am not an Hausa man and I have not written it to vilify the man but logically and reasonably present what the issues are.

For your info, prof. Charles Soludo is one of my mentors because i have great respect for his mental sagacity and brilliancy. I expect you people to critique my opinion constructively and not otherwise.

chuksey1:
guy mk i hear word eee. i have been to ebsu isihieke and presco campus. e nor even fine reach my secondary school.. ebsu is d only school i knw of wey guys de use ladies bike tk woo gals and dem de fall.

modath:
How many people would be changed before their people cry persecution?

funkiebully:
Z just said it. It was meant to be a secret movement But the state govt got wind of it and alerted d traders union Which promptly acted.

Now they have no option than to deny it since it lead to a protest and exposed

INTROVERT:
Who needs a job when pops is a petroleum products marketer. shey u agree.

UnknownT:
How come I haven't seen the 1st runner up congratulate the winner? Is he under ban? Or he wanna contest the result? Btw, Congratulations to Tomfrench, the person I voted for won unlike the Miss NL competition

tinkinjow:
I just wish Niegrian courts start asserting themselves in matters like this.
Why did America wait so long before seeking his extradition. The same Obasanjo that started this round once used him as his right hand man.Then he never said the guy was want in America for drug offences.
Good job judges. Next please.

ammyluv2002:
Excellent Spirit

PassingShot:
I can see frustration written all over you guys.

To start with, you didn't vote for Change, so why this much concern?

Those who voted for change are happy with him so far. If you've got a problem with that, do the needful by visiting the lagoon, or taking otapiapia, or help yourself with something similar to the attached.

If you think his traveling is for tea parties, you need your brains examined.

anago500:
I salute Officer,

Cc

GenIgrigi

anago500:
welcome Officer

cc

attacker231

scatterboss

anago500:
Greet these three insurgils for the reminder

tunde salam ola aka goodslayer

arode williams tsolaye aka Tsolz300

segun adewale aka TRIBALEAST


Hahahahahahahahahaha

send them greetings from the Reminder

signed

The Revelation

For the Operatives

cc

GenIgrigi

Cyberwolf

Iconize

ArodeTsolaye

huptin:
Truth hurts, keep insulting that's what people who have neither the substance nor the intellect to debate on public forums do.

huptin:
Did i hear you say most SE states are not? Abia=10months, Ebonyi= 8 months, Imo=5 months, Enugu (owing all its parastatals 10 months salary)
So where did you get your statistics from? By the way those people who are not being paid salaries are probably in the south west, hawking gala or selling bend down select to survive.

Ask your self a question in terms of revenue, how much exactly does the SE contribute to Nigeria? How much is it getting from The Federal government?
Dont mention oil o, cos the amount of oil in the SE is not even as much as that of Ondo alone, now the south west does not only contirbute oil, they account for about 80% of total non oil revenue, and their land is the industrial and commercial nerve centre of the whole country, yet they can't even get 13% of the total revenue they generate? What is good for the goose is good for the gander, If the SS gets 13% of their total oil earnings despite the fact that a huge chunk of their cistizens are in lagos, putting pressure on Lagos infratructure, Then Lagos should retain a huge chunk of its ports and VAT earnings. That is justice.