₦airaland Forum

Good day to everyone,

I'm currently perturbed, hence can't be indifferent to sharing this emotional trauma that has been eating me up lately and gradually. As we all know, a problem shared is a problem half-solved.

First and foremost, let me introduce myself. I'm Cadet Austin P Vindals. I'm 25 years old. Aside my military career, I'm also business inclined, for I control, by proxy, pretty good business, particularly, on haulage and logistics.

There is this, tall and well built, radiant, succulent and beautiful 19yr old girl - you know, I have an eye for good stuffs - whom I have been dating for a year, 6 months now, and I intend marrying her in 3years time. So far, everything have been rosy and smooth. We had never had any issues. We love and adore each other dearly. I believe that this girl even loves me more than I do love her. She is endearing a lot. She bombards me with calls and sweet messages. She always cares and inquires about my well being - whether I'm in school or elsewhere.

Despite all of the above quality of character dispositions, I'm still not comfortable with her; sometimes I wish I never had her in the first place. Guys, I'm rugged and gallant, but highly emotional as well. I'm not usually physically present to her due to my military academic calendar restraints. Since distance btw us is constitutes a huge barrier, sometimes when I call her and she doesn't pick; I'm usually enveloped in anger and suspicions, because I usually assumed that she is side-stepping(dating other guys). Most times, if she doesn't pick series of my calls, as soon as she calls back upon returning from wherever, I usually rain abusive verbal punches on her which force her into crying. Even when a part of me says she is innocent, my emotions wouldn't let me be, always suspecting her, because her busty and beautiful body - I know for sure - will be attractive to those stupid(idiots, who wouldn't mind their wives and girlfriends) guys out there. This has been the main reason I feel so insecure in my relationship.

To be snappy with my decision, I recently had a terrible dream. In that dream, I and this girl were relaxing on a sofa, suddenly, I heard a screeching blare from a kinda sonorous object. As I turned left to look so as to ascertain what was happening, before I could look back; my girlfriend was already in a speedily driving car with another guy, driving away. I shouted, stood up and pursued them, all to no avail, before long, they are gone. This moment, I woke-up. I couldn't phatom the actual meaning of such dream.

Guys, am afraid; because, I hardly dream, and each time I do, it usually comes to pass, if not 100%, it is at least, 80%. This unique reality of my dreams always coming to pass is my major cause of the fear I harbor in my relationship now. Like I said earlier, I'm too emotional, and can't allow a woman to dumb me for another guy first, instead I should be the one to dump her; to be dumped by a woman has never happen to me. Now, I'm being pushed by my feelings to dump her first, I e, to be the one to ditch her before she does it first.
Note: she has not done anything bad to me ooh, but I want to call her and divulge my resolve to her. Please, experienced relationship experts in the house, I hope am on the right track? Is this dream natural, spiritual or psychologically triggered? Please, I'm confused help me. Thanks.

Bro. Since you poor like this, that you no even fit buy items like pair of shoes, hand bags, clothes, etc, not to talk about oza stuffs like phones, perfumes, etc.

I go advise you to let that babe be. Do make her life miserable. Go find away to make moni, nobi to dey look woman yansh while you no get kobo to even support the yansh.

Just go treat this disease called poverty wey dey ravage your poor ass. Allow guyz them wey grab coins wella to take what rightfully belong to them by power of moni. U dey hia me so? If I catch you, you go hiaram fool.

You wan make the babe come follow you dey suffer, abii? God punish you there!

The 8th(last one) does not seem right. How could they say that anything one spends money and time on is a sign of their hidden talent?

Does it mean that all those guys you gatz to see whenever you visit beer parlors, club houses, and other similar places, are living out their talents?

What the f*ck do they mean? Then, we should start praising all the drunks, ashawo patrons(people who visit brothel), womanizers, etc, for living out their talents, because they spend monies and times doing all those things.

OP, you are a complete buffon, clown, dunce, and to crown it all, an idiot.

You are an epitome of weakness; you are a disgrace to manhood and manliness. Fool!

Assuming, you have been married for 15 years without a child(you have been childless), and the fault is from you, and finally along the line, after several medical, religious, and spiritual approach, etc, you were able to get your wife pregnant and subsequently she put to bed a bouncing baby boy - an apparent heir to you wealth.

All of a sudden, hoodlums break into your home and point a gun at you threatening to blast you head if you don't sign-off your wealth to them, out of strategic defiance you refuse. They turn to your only begotten child, hold the infant baby boy in the same manner as the photo below depicts.

What would you do at that point? Would you sign off your wealth(and money), or would you let them blow your sons skull open?

Note: candid opinions and decisions please.

MrsPhysics:
Why are you frustrated. Please today is Sunday, and your type need no heaven. If God is like you, then everyone will perish.

No woman will want to be with your type. Your girlfriend is a hero for being with you.

Shut your trap, idiot.

Madam you are very stupid and evil to have cheated on your husband. What the Bleep are you telling us? Listen and listen good, you adulterous woman; of you don't confess to your husband, God will punish you Idiot to death.

Madam...See, I reject your type as my future wife...God forbid! God knows, that I have vowed to be 100% faithful to any woman that I finally Settle down with in marriage.

Paradventure my future wife cheats on me, God forbid oo, I will have no option than to spray and riddle her body with hot bullets. Yes, I will kill her, for she has sinned against me and God.

Let me state it again, I hate evil, and wouldn't want evil to be meted out to me. Once I become married, I promised God that I would never look at any other woman other than my wife. When I go on business trip, I shall go on maximum trust that my wife would never cheat on me in my absence, and I shall give her my very sincere assurance and confidence that am not gonna cheat on her, no matter the circumstance. I shall, let her know in all honesty that whenever I emback on any trip, be it biz tour, Church Programm, military oriented tour, etc, that it is 100% concentration on what I am traveling for.
Even now that I am single, though, I keep female friends biz each time I try meeting other girls aside my Main girl, I find it difficult being in their company. I Do feel deep sense of guilt, that I often regret ever stepping out with any other girl, because when I love it is 100%. If my love, a 19yr old, decides to cheat on me, good. I won't touch her, because I have yet to marry her. But once, I get married to her, and start getting information that she cheats on me; I wouldn't react. I would just have to hold my Chills till I confirm and catch her red-Händed in the act..., and once my type do...y'all know what? She will have to pay wiff her life...simple.

Guys Don't get me wrong. I am calm, and reserved but not foolish. I am very hot-tempered(ill-tempered). I love instant Justice, hence dont hasitate to serving it instanta to err-pins.

I am a 25 yr old man, and my girl is already aware of my attributes. I told her that once we are married, it gonna be strictly on both of us, and no one else, that then should she do anyhow(cheat), am no gonna hasitate in taking her out, including the idiat that gonna be with her on that, God forbid, ill-fated day, because in my own path, I shall be a faithful and loving husband that surd gonna be the envy of other ladies. I made her understand that she is free to go her separate now, If she knows that she no gonna play by marital rules when the time comes, but she obliged and promised that such will never happen. Now we are good to go in highest 2yrs time from now.

As for you Madam...go and die, you slut. #NONSENSE!!!

gnykelly:
sorry bro ican do 25, but willing to go higher probably 70. what technic would you suggest and what pain reliever can one use for beginnner. thanks

It depends on your zeal for whatever purpose you are doing the push-ups.

What is your body weight, and what is your torso's weight in relation to your body what? For me, I weigh 77kg, as expected, my torso's weight is something 54kg. So each time I push up, carry this weight(54kg) up and down 100 times.

For you, start by drilling yourself every morning, and endeavor to increase it by 2 every 3 days. Do this morning and evening. Do not relent, or lazy around. You will marvel at the level of strength around your arm and chest region you will have built over short time. When the strength built counteract the weight of your torso, you sure gonna be amazed at the number of push ups you can go.

Note: it depends on strict reference to your BMI(Body Mass Index).

Lest I forget, combine it with sit ups as well. You need to strengthen you abdominal muscles as well, or don't you like 6-packs?

As a Kungfu blackiest(black belter), when I go on fitness training; I do up to 100 standard push-ups. In NDA, normal is 70, as I entered, I didn't want to be center of attraction, because I know I could go well above the 70 considered for the toughest guys. I usually feign overstretched when I get to 72 straight and I stop here to avoid making other cadets notice whom I'm.

Presently, I don't do much because my girlfriend is complaining that my body is getting too strong, and v-shaped. Now, I do only 80 push-ups, 60 pull-ups on the bar-cross, 60 sit-ups every morning, and evening aside Sundays.

If I'm on break, maybe I have been sign up to participate in a competition; I do what is called #BREAKING POINT fitness training or SYSTEM ENDURANCE LIMIT TEXTING DRILL, because I wouldn't want my opponent to disgrace me at all. That is why I try building the strength of my body muscles: abdominal muscles, thigh muscles, chest muscles, toe ligament strengthening, arm muscles, etc.

DONFASZY:
Hw can u call a jambites ur angel
U ve bin abusing her sexually n dis is why she scored lower
U didn't allow her read
Some of her mate at 19yr are in final year or grad
Allow dis gal to concentrate?u go dump her later for sure

I can never cheat on her, talk more of ditching.

glowryhaa:
she might... We are in Nigeria where anything happens... Nothing wrong with d age but she's still naive it would hv been different if she's in school.. Bcx uni comes with a lot of adrenaline rush n urge to try new things.. My little one kobo

Noted, tnx.

mansoura:
It is well.. Already a fiancée at 19years??

We love ourselves, and am 25.

Note: am the only son, hence the need to marry early.

darlingnuel:
Funny. Even with 180, she would be admitted for MATHEMATICS. They'd even beg you to comw study it. its not a high demand course

Good to know. I tried convincing her to go for Engineering but she said that would be after her first degree. She has passion for math. She is good in computer programming(java, php, drupal, etc), because I want her to study computer engineering.

papadee93:
Sorry to pry........ Do you have younger ones? And are you this interested I their affairs? Has your family benefitted from your education?

Yes bro. Am the first born and the only son. I have 4 younger sisters. I believe they have benefited, and are still benefiting from me which is suppose.

I love my sweet sisters a lot. They cherish me a lot, so I can't let them down.

Bin3:
i will advice u to take a change of course form for her to uniben affiliated campus in FCE she will be given admission quick

Thank you dear, but let's wait to see what becomes of UNN.

Partnerbiz:
It would be very conceited of you to think that no woman can leave you.
There is no man in the world that a woman can't leave. The level of wealth or achievements nothwithstanding.


I will be blunt and it will pain you but I care not and will be honest.
Proposing to a 19yrd old about to gain admission is most unwise decision esp if there is no child or may be marriage. It is worse when you may foot her bills in school. Learn from history bro and don't repeat mistakes others have made.

Girls, I am sorry to say, can be stupid.They can forget all your care and investments in a jiffy.
My guy picked a stranded girl and trained her in UNEC law faculty Enugu. He paid law school fees of 300k even. Parents and siblings accepted her. The girl knew what she wanted. It ended badly.

I have seen many sad tales. You are taking a huge risk.


It appears you are a good guy thinking about love.
Man nothing like love. Life is business not love. Yes, and I can establish that as a fact.

Be wise today bro. Build wealth now you think you ate blessed and marry later.

Tnx bro. I love your concise advice. It sounds like that of an older brother to younger kid brother. I will think about it. The issue is that, I have numerous ladies trying to be intimate with me, but I don't have feelings for them. I'm an only son in my family, and my family wants me to marry as early as possible. I'm okay financially and even growing more in scope...tnx to God, but I don't think my woman can be so stupid to act strange. She does express fears that am gonna leave her but I have assured her never to mind that I'm with her. I hope to marry her next year, so that I can concentrate on my businesses and fledgling company. Thank your bro. God is in control.

MayhorE:
she's just trying to go back to where she came from, she doesn't belong here, she belong there

Bro, what do you mean? I don't understand your assertion.

Ologogoro:
You caused it!! You were running after her when she was supposed to be reading for Jamb

Lol, I didn't run after her. The IT institute she attended after her WAEC early 2016 is in a distant location to mine base. So what do you mean?

Partnerbiz:
She will be fine whether or not she gains admission.
Time will heal her.

Aside: Chances are 80% that you will come back here to lament in few year's time over this girl's attitude once she gains admission.
Just leave her alone now and focus on your future. When you are ready for marriage there will be many girls around.
You seem to be enjoying her naivety now.

The way you sound you will invest in her education hoping to marry her later. Such arrangements fail 85% of the time.
You sound green and youthful too.

Don't say I didn't warn you.

Tnx, advice noted but am a guy that no sane woman would live for another guy.

She is 19 last March. I'm 25 and already blessed, and proposed on her birthday. So bro, am not God oo, but let the will of God happen btw us.

Titheman:
some people would pay anything for that score.... tell ha to relax her olevel will cover ha

Tnx bro. Good to know.

Mosihc:
Yes... I'm a unn student too... She would make it on the merit list

Tnx a lot. Am happy for this info.

Pls, my 19yr old fiancée disappointed me big time. She scored only 219 in her JAMB result, which she has attributed to hanging system, ie, troublesome computer system they assigned to her on the day of her exam. She intends to study pure Mathematics.

Does she stand a chance in gaining admission in UNN at all?

Note: this is her first JAMB sitting, because last year she took a 1 year-four months course on computer programming and cyber security, in a foriegn owned private tech institution, and concluded it 2 months ago, before she settled to study for her JAMB exam.

I learned that they now consider O-LEVEL results. In case of that, in her 2015 WEAC, she got three A's(Maths, Physics & Geography), two B's(Chemistry and Biology), and four C4 credits(Economics, Agric.sc, Igbo Language, & English Language), in a sitting.

Pls pals, she has been crying all day long, not wanting to eat, and couldn't believe her result. Pls guys, could she make it to mathematics?

OP, thank you for this post. Pls, my 19yr old fiancée disappointed me big time. She scored only 219 in her JAMB result, which she attributed to hanging system assigned to her on the day of her exam, and she intends to study Mathematics.
Does she stand a chance in gaining admission in UNN at all?

Note: this is her first JAMB sitting, because she took a 1 year-four months course on computer programming and cyber security, in a foriegn owned private tech institution, and concluded it 2 months ago before she settled to study for her JAMB exam.

I learned that they now consider O-LEVEL results. In case of that, in her 2015 WEAC, she had 3 As(Maths, Physics & Geography), 2 Bs(Chemistry and Biology), and 4 C4 credits(Economics, Agric.sc, Igbo Language, & English Language).

Pls pals, she has been crying all day long. Could she make it to mathematics?

Dating older ladies is fun. As for me, I'm currently dating 3 different ladies. One of them is 21; I'm older than her by 6yrs, and inwardly, she is the one am gonna marry this coming December or next year.

The other 2 are 33 and 35 respectively. In fact, one thing I noticed in them(these two) is the urge to always make me happy. They are both working class, and are damn gorgeous, but have been taking for a ride by the different guys that have been in their lives.
In a nutshell, during intimate conversations with each of them. I realized that they have been through hell when it comes to relationship matters. These ladies have suffered heartbreaks, disappointments, abuses, etc.

But trust me, I was bold enough to ask them what each want in the relationships I have with each of them respectively.

To be frank, I was shocked when the first of the two older ladies told me that “you see Dave, I know that you no gonna marry me, but what I seek for, is your manliness. Your power to make me feel like a woman. Your company. I know that husbands are scarce; I pray you that paradventure, I don't marry in the next 2 years to come, pls do get me pregnant. Am 33 and not getting any younger.
For being a working class; I can take care of my baby, our baby, your baby...okay, even though I know, you wouldn't come openly.”
She is 33, and works with an oil coy. She studied Biochemistry, and graduated with second class upper.

As I psych the other lady, she said that, though she is older than me by 8yrs(she is 35); that she is not against my dating younger ladies, that all she wants is my attention.

This lady is a naval officer, with good pay, but I don't know why men don't want to commit to her, whether they are afraid; I don't know? But she is very caring to me. Anytime she is on break, she usually flies to my location and lodges in a well-fit hotel for one week plus, all to see me. We Bleep anyhow, gist, walk around, go shopping, eat palatable meals,etc. In fact, she lavishes naval money on me.
One thing I like in her is her intelligence(she studied electronics engineering before going into the military), calmness, and composure. Despite having a rank in the navy that is equivalent to major in army(Naval Captain) - at relatively younger age. She equally said she would want me to get impregnate her with time. That she would want to have a baby if she doesn't see a husband.

Older women are fun to be with; they buy you gifts, take care of you, pamper you, etc. In fact, I don't buy anything for them; they are the ones buying and showering me with gifts. If I feel like making love to them when they are free, I either choose a hotel of my choice or I move to their location(apartments), but am not usually comfortable with passing a night in a woman's apartment. I makes me feel less a guy, that is why I prefer suits in serene locations.

These ladies act maturely. They don't nag when they see any msg on my phone, nor do they monitor my calls.

Guys,most of you are aware of how the devils in women could be let loose once certain situation in their lives changes, which could be getting a well-paying job, being famous, etc.

As a result of the above, they seem so arrogant and conceited, and see themselves as goddesses.
This consideration informed my decision to ask the following questions below:

Guys, are you gonna be comfortable in a relationship, particularly, when your wife/girlfriend is richer than you are(has bigger financial muscle than you)?

Are you gonna remain in that relationship or simply walk away, knowing full well about the recoil consequences of not quitting?

Hell no! May thunder fire satan, and may God punish mr Lucifer wey go push me go do that kain nonsense. I dey mad? Craze don dey worry me abii Women are meant to be under us, not the other way round.

No munchi love fit push me enter that kain tin. Love dey blind, but I own love no blind oo; im open I like fish.

What lubbish is dat self? Mtcheew.

Good day, great Nairalanders.

My elder cousin brother 29, now feels insecure about his relationship with his girlfriend of 5 years.

It all started, after his now 24 years old girlfriend passed out from NYSC2015 Batch A) last year, and luckily enough, she got job with a tobacco company(Benson & Hedges) as a district manager(after undergoing 1 month training in the company). The company gave her Hilux Jeep kind off pickup van, and hired an apartment for her. In addition, she receives N350K as salary excluding other allowances.

On the part of my older cousin brother, who graduated from the university 4 years ago, with no job, only hustling since then to make ends meet; he was very exited over his girl's successful employment, but things changed.
The lady that, hitherto, wouldn't do anything before informing him, is now wanting, now lording it over him.
She now commands my brother like a small boy of 12. She asked my brother to move in with her into her new apartment, he refused, which prompted her to rain all sorts of accusation on him about following other girls, because he has enough time attributed to his joblessness.

After much nagging, my brother moved in with her. Although, she promised to fix my. Brother in another company soon, my brother stays at home most times. Before she goes to work, she would drop N5k for his flexing. One day, my brother strolled down the street, and decided to chill out at a bar. There she met one of our family friend's daughter, who just stopped her car by the road side to buy roasted fish. They met and exchanged pleasantries, and even sat closely over a few bottles of drinks and plates of pepper soup on the same table as they conversed deeply. Not too long, my brother's girlfriend arrived the bar in company of two teenage ladies that assist her to deliver stocks from the Hilux van to shop outlets, to do some Benson Switch supply; upon sighting my brother with the lady on the same table, she shouted his name, attacked both of them with broken bottle of beer. My brother and the lady had to run for their lives. After moment of rage, she and her two assisting teenagers drove off.

Not done yet, she effected the arrest and detention of my brother for 2weeks. All plea to release him fell on deaf ears. Later, she asked them to release him after the prove that my brother was not dating the lady or any woman aside her.

She cried bitterly and apologized to my brother - saying she didn't know what that came over her. My brother forgave her, subsequently, she demanded that he should move into her home again; but this time around, my brother is reluctant about doing so.

Guys, my brother is in dilemma. Should he quit the relationship. And find another lady?

What should he do? Candid advice please.

gbegemaster:
Fake story

Are you from Imo?

Jodha:
He was too harsh.. It's because of morons like this.. Why were Nigerians are painted black abroad..

And if yhu check well.. Nah one ugly igbo man with rumpled face nai post that trash...

Stop attacking the guy. Check him out; he is handsome joor. Moreover, I agree with him. After checking the woman's photos, you wouldn't have choice but to agree with him.

baqina:
Who says d woman is not beautiful? d guy with d comment should hide his head in shame and I pity those hailing him.
How is being beautiful or not his headache...It is because of this irresponsible attitude that we have high suicide rate.

Guy, to be frank, let's call thing the way they are. I just checked the woman's other photos; she is damn ugly. After viewing her photos, you could as well agree with the guy.

Jodha:
He was too harsh.. It's because of morons like this.. Why were Nigerians are painted black abroad..

And if yhu check well.. Nah one ugly igbo man with rumpled face nai post that trash...

Why call him slowpoke? He made a valid point.