istoctober:


l lost my three months preggy cos of my depreesion in Jan, 2016. Ever since, l have not been myself. l keep seeing myself as not worth living.
Each time l look at him, l have this guilty conscience that l have disappointed God and my parents. I cry in my lonely hours and it has made me to stay calm even in my right at home, l felt that l deserve everything that is happening to me.

the deed has been done. just pack up your things before telling him, Let him also know how ashamed you feel, and unworthy of his love. you should also ask yourself if you are true my happy in your marriage and what could have pushed u into another man's bed. It will be more painful if he has always been faithful to you. suicide or depression isn't the answer.

Demainman1:


You fuc k pastor, you confess to pastor

Is like you are one of the gullible. Women and pastors

You took that out of my mouth.. Woman are just so so blind when it cms to religion and religion leaders

MrsPhysics:

Why are you frustrated. Please today is Sunday, and your type need no heaven. If God is like you, then everyone will perish.

No woman will want to be with your type. Your girlfriend is a hero for being with you.

Shut your trap, idiot.

Ishilove:
[b][/b]
You answered the first two, and avoided the last question.

That's you knowing what you should do but battling with your conscience.

Who can condemn who God has forgiven? While you flogging yourself, God is saying 'I love you and I will not remember your past iniquities'.

You realised your wrong, asked God for forgiveness and repented. Now you have to forgive yourself and let go. God has not condemned you so free yourself from the cage you have put yourself.

If you say you want to confess then also prepare yourself for the storm that will follow.

As for your husband, what's up with all these mental fuckery? Are you acting in any way that's making him suspect you?

OMG! U are such a bad adviser...are u christian?
U think God is human we play tricks on?
Go find out what he did to David & Moses in the bible...
Op committed adultery, cheated on her husband, she is still living under the same roof with this man, eating & sleeping with him, she didn't confess to the man whom she cheated on. But went about telling pastors that advised her to keep it a secret & u think that is how forgiveness works? The forgiveness of her husband is paramount if u understand anything abt christianity....

grossintel:
Madam God has forgiven you, go and sin no more. But don't tell him, men can't handle infidelity. Just don't do it anymore and love him, confessing to him is ending your marriage .

please speak for yourself, personally i'll forgive her

don't confess if you know you will not do it again. if you that thing made you cheat at the first place stop it

Topgainer:

That is not Christianity.
I repeat that foolish restitution is not Christianity and this particular Hell is a creation of you and your hypocrite overseer.
The things that lead to hell are clearly spelt out in the Bible. Your parochial doctrines and long lists mean nothing.

Restitution is not Christianity? Nawa for some I-too-know sha!

angels09:

So you cheated on your hubby too?

Thank God I've caught her myself.

Hmmmm.........


The world is not ready for your confession.




Or the repercussions of your confession.

Mayflowa:


Something is really wrong with you, not the cheating. Do you know how many times men cheat and still smile when they get home? You have prayed for forgiveness and you have been forgiven. Why are you then hard on yourself? The devil is the one rubbing this guilt on you until you lose your sanity and home. That is his work- to kill, steal and destroy.

Tell him and see that your situation now will be far better than after your confession. Pastors are the master of the game. lol. they cheat, ask for forgiveness, and never tell their spouses. Seriously, you are the one killing yourself. Your husband is probably cheating sef!

I just spot a cheater

Women in their quest to be like men and do whatever men do have become horrible creatures instead of the epitome of grace and virtue they were created to be!

Women in their quest to become equal to men have turned to valleys of shame! Feminists will say: if a man can cheat on his wife or girlfriend, then a woman should also cheat on her husband or boyfriend but these shameless feminists and 21st century civilized women forgot that nature didn't create man and woman the same way.

Now before you come here to blab nonsense about gender equality or what have u, answer these natural questions:

1. ‎Women have hymen (nylon like membrane) covering their canal organ before they have sex, why didn't nature put same in men's organ

2. Women get pregnant and carry the baby for 9 months while the man that did it walks away freely without stress and may even deny being responsible

3. On the first time a woman have sex, she experiences pains and most likely she bleeds, but men don't even know what the difference is the first day they had sex and even after multiple times.


Ladies listen up, no matter how hard feminist and gender equality proponents preach it, you ladies can never be equal to men....you can never outdo a man....God created you ladies to keep the world morally sane....dont lose that role nature and God bestowed on you just because u want to do what men are doing!

When a woman cheats, the consequences are grievous all over the world! Feminism is destroying the whole world!

Due to feminism, European guys no longer long and desire to marry their women like before and this is affecting European population as their youth/children population is dwindling as marriage reduces.

It is gradually spreading to Nigeria....guys are getting tired of marrying modern Nigerian ladies because the lady u married wants to be equal to u; she cooks today, she expects u to cook tomorrow or else she says u are not romantic....yet she expects u to foot the family bills more than her....no attractive pack in for a guy to dream and desire to marry again, too bad.

Your wife catches you staring at a lady, she threatens to cheat back because feminism is teaching her to ensure she do whatever u do!

At the end, na women go cry sha.....men are ready to be having only sex and producing babies with any woman....wetin concern them, if Nigerian women use their newly found civilization attitude to kill marriage, they will be the ones to suffer it...go ask American and European women how far...Nigerian Yahoo boys are chopping them mugu up and down due to loneliness as their men are no longer taking marriage serious!‎

istoctober:
l had to open this account to tell this story and l know that l will be bashed for this but l really need to get it off my chest.
it was in 2014, that l cheated on him and since then, l have not been myself. l have confessed to Pastors but l can't forget it and my mind keep telling me that God has forgotten about me cos whenever l pray, l find it difficult to concentrate and that's why l want to confess to him.
l know he will send me packing because he said something like that to me and the fear is what is keeping me from confessing to him. l don't want to be disgraced out of my home cos my husband will definitely do it.
l can't blame him for my shortcomings but myself for allowing devil into my home.
l really need your advice for help.... You can curse me but l deserve it for being a loose woman but l seriously need help cos depression wants to take over my life that l think of suicide to escape shame and mockery from people in case he finds out.

don't confess to him, only 1/10000000 men can forgive a cheating wife. since you have confessed to your pastor, forgive yourself and resolve not to do it again. move on, think about what you have built in the marriage and your children and what you still hope to chive with yourself and your family.
answer this question, if he send you packing, what's next?

istoctober:
l had to open this account to tell this story and l know that l will be bashed for this but l really need to get it off my chest.
it was in 2014, that l cheated on him and since then, l have not been myself. l have confessed to Pastors but l can't forget it and my mind keep telling me that God has forgotten about me cos whenever l pray, l find it difficult to concentrate and that's why l want to confess to him.
l know he will send me packing because he said something like that to me and the fear is what is keeping me from confessing to him. l don't want to be disgraced out of my home cos my husband will definitely do it.
l can't blame him for my shortcomings but myself for allowing devil into my home.
l really need your advice for help.... You can curse me but l deserve it for being a loose woman but l seriously need help cos depression wants to take over my life that l think of suicide to escape shame and mockery from people in case he finds out.

God will heal and forgive you ma. You need to forgive yourself. I tried to read through some of the comments.
Please how old is your husband and for how long have you been married? I can deduced you were 29 when it happened.
You will need to tell your husband because one you have told some Pastors, one way or the other he may get to know.
Two, you need to free your mind and move on Proverb 28:13.
God will teach you how to go about it and I will join you in prayer.
After you tell, you need to see marriage counsellors who are men and women of God, not necessarily your Pastors, but people you can trust.

All will be well.

Ishilove:

The same man will go to the altar and preach. No wonder we have so many powerless Christians now. It's because the spirit of God is no longer in many churches for they have been polluted from the altar

so secrets are better left untold...trust me d moment u tell ur hubby, everything changes.

it is a terrible thing for a husband to discover that his lovely wife actually cheated on him. it is normally painful but iam not here to judge you because we are all not perfect but I tell you something there is no true repentance without confession so do take time convince yourself before talking don't rush. he might forgive you for love.

istoctober:
l had to open this account to tell this story and l know that l will be bashed for this but l really need to get it off my chest.
it was in 2014, that l cheated on him and since then, l have not been myself. l have confessed to Pastors but l can't forget it and my mind keep telling me that God has forgotten about me cos whenever l pray, l find it difficult to concentrate and that's why l want to confess to him.
l know he will send me packing because he said something like that to me and the fear is what is keeping me from confessing to him. l don't want to be disgraced out of my home cos my husband will definitely do it.
l can't blame him for my shortcomings but myself for allowing devil into my home.
l really need your advice for help.... You can curse me but l deserve it for being a loose woman but l seriously need help cos depression wants to take over my life that l think of suicide to escape shame and mockery from people in case he finds out.

Cook his favourite dish with your bags Packed, while in ''the mid of meal'' spill it all out as he stares at ur packed bags. If u got kid(s), Jst Prepare for the unexpected.. Move on with ur life.

enomakos:
I just spot a cheater

Hahahaha. Seriously, I don't cheat. Yes. Its bad to cheat but she has done it! I am just frustrated at how deep she is hitting herself to dealth. How many men ever go to confess to their wives of their cheating until they are caught? I try to balance gender right

[quote author=Jadonjack post=57176608]

Wrong advise!!![/quo
Give her the right advise.

For most of you advising her to confess to her husband,

You all will be in ur various houses chilling with your families while her marraige crashes.

Roseey0:

There is noo restitution in Christ plz. Christ took it all on the cross.
What restitution did Christ give the woman caught in adultery?
Go and sin no more
That's all..

Istoctober
Plz buy Joseph Prince books and read
You just need to accept that God has forgiven you.

Smh
Modern day christianity...It doesn't really matter syndrome, that is why today's churches condone all type of sin...

@bold...u people just interprete the bible to suit your selfish desires....
answer this question;
Was op not aware adultery is a grevious sin in christianity before she committed the act?

What u are saying in essence is we as christians should go about committing sin & ask for forgiveness?
May God forgive u...

Topgainer:

Stay away from all these seers and 'genuine' prophets/pastors.
They partner devil in ruining homes. You don't need such mediators to God. Jesus is more than enough for, says your Bible.

are you a christian? Do you go to church? Do you believe in your pastor/prophet/rev/father? If answer any of these questions in the affirmative then check you will still make such comment

Jadonjack:


Wrong advise!!!

Give her the right advise.
For most of you advising her to confess to her husband,
You all will be in ur various houses chilling with your families while her marraige crashes.

Is that you Grace?

YelloweWest:

98% of Nigerian men cheat at some point during their marriages.
Fact.

And how did you arrive at this? Care to share the method used?

Cadillac15:


My fear for the op is that one of the pastors who know about her adultery(including the one she commited it with) is going to blackmail her in the future to have a taste of her.

If she refuses, her husband will be informed.

If she agrees, the cycle continues.

If she confesses, she receives her punishment and unburdens her heart. Who knows, the husband might suprise her.

If she refuses and the husband finds out from a blackmailer, the marriage ends without remedy.

Therefore, istoctober, choose your option well

you said it all

johnson232:

Smh
Modern day christianity...It doesn't really matter syndrome, that is why today's churches condone all type of sin...

@bold...u people just interprete the bible to suit your selfish desires....
answer this question;
Was op not aware adultery is a grevious sin in christianity before she committed the act?

What u are saying in essence is we as christians should go about committing sin & ask for forgiveness?
May God forgive u...

Christianity came with Chris, nothing like old or new Christian. plz follow Christ's teaching. Read John 8 again and tell me where restitution was mentioned by Christ himself. Abi Jesus is now a new generation Christian too
Or remain in the old testament and continue to sacrifice bulls on the alter.

ShaqFu:
And how did you arrive at this? Care to share the method used?

Look around... show me one Nigerian man married for 40years (basically a life time) without cheating.

author=Chigorkizz post=57176949]

It isn't a must to be a christian
Nobody compelled the op to open this thread...
But if she wants God's forgiveness & that of her man...i believe that is the price she has to pay...

Adam & Eve was sent out of the garden of eden because they committed sin...that was the price they had to pay

Moses never entered the promise land because he disobeyed God....

If your kind of sin warrants paying a price....do it & be close to God...

What the eye doesn't see, the ear doesn't hear, the heart doesn't grieve about........

istoctober:
l had to open this account to tell this story and l know that l will be bashed for this but l really need to get it off my chest.
it was in 2014, that l cheated on him and since then, l have not been myself. l have confessed to Pastors but l can't forget it and my mind keep telling me that God has forgotten about me cos whenever l pray, l find it difficult to concentrate and that's why l want to confess to him.
l know he will send me packing because he said something like that to me and the fear is what is keeping me from confessing to him. l don't want to be disgraced out of my home cos my husband will definitely do it.
l can't blame him for my shortcomings but myself for allowing devil into my home.
l really need your advice for help.... You can curse me but l deserve it for being a loose woman but l seriously need help cos depression wants to take over my life that l think of suicide to escape shame and mockery from people in case he finds out.

OP. I'm appalled by the kind of advice I find people giving here. Only God will judge you and all that.

Whatever happened to Matthew 5.23-24?
Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.
So why don't Jesus advice that only God can judge you?

Some are opining that you see a psychiatrist. Have you know yourself to have mental issues in the past?
Some say you've suffered enough and should just forget it. Well, more suffering is sure to come your way if you listen to such serpentine talks.

It is a living conscience you have. The same God who will be the one to judge you is the one also who gave you such a fiery conscience.

Hiding the truth from your husband is a second sin. No matter the consequences. I say TELL HIM and damn the consequences. Your peace of soul is more important than your marriage. Yes. Even the naysayers will be the first to tell you that.

But it might be instructive if you seek help in telling him. Get somebody you know he listens to, then, beg that person to go with you on the d-day. Prepare to even leave the house for some time. Make him know you understand the consequences but that you beg for his forgiveness.

Don't listen to naysayers. TELL HIM. The sooner the better.

If its any consolation OP, I would give myself as bride price to have a woman like you as my wife.
You're a treasure and I'm sure your hubby will forgive you.
Stay blessed.

You must be very stupid to think of telling your husband about infidelity you committed in 2014! U have made peace with your God and that is most important! My wife telling about her sexual indiscretion done in 2010 will shake my foundation to the limit! And that is the truth!