₦airaland Forum

Truckpusher:
You're here forming something else ,while in real life you're prolly licking ya hubby's ass like a big fat local dog that just saw a huge deposit of human excrete.

Kontinu

lol! Now that's funny!

Cherlene:
Greetings

Super, LOVELY!

Cherlene

greetings too. Thanks abunch!

The parable of 8 Monkeys

(This is reportedly based on an actual experiment conducted in the U.K.)

Put eight monkeys in a room. In the middle of the room is a ladder, leading to a bunch of bananas hanging from a hook on the ceiling.

Each time a monkey tries to climb the ladder, all the monkeys are sprayed with ice water, which makes them miserable. Soon enough, whenever a monkey attempts to climb the ladder, all of the other monkeys, not wanting to be sprayed, set upon him and beat him up. Soon, none of the eight monkeys ever attempts to climb the ladder.

One of the original monkeys is then removed, and a new monkey is put in the room. Seeing the bananas and the ladder, he wonders why none of the other monkeys are doing the obvious. But undaunted, he immediately begins to climb the ladder.

All the other monkeys fall upon him and beat him silly. He has no idea why.

However, he no longer attempts to climb the ladder.

A second original monkey is removed and replaced. The newcomer again attempts to climb the ladder, but all the other monkeys hammer the crap out of him.

This includes the previous new monkey, who, grateful that he’s not on the receiving end this time, participates in the beating because all the other monkeys are doing it. However, he has no idea why he’s attacking the new monkey.

One by one, all the original monkeys are replaced. Eight new monkeys are now in the room. None of them have ever been sprayed by ice water. None of them attempt to climb the ladder. All of them will enthusiastically beat up any new monkey who tries, without having any idea why.

And that is how traditions, religions and systems get established and followed.

Think twice before following a tradition,religion or system blindly .. it wud make more sense if u get ur own understanding of it......

1. Beauty attracts men but wisdom keeps them.
2. Elegance catches men's attention but
intelligence convinces them.
3. Nagging irritates men but 'constructive silence
weakens them.
4. The 'boy' in everyman pumps out occasionally,
your ability to handle this, is a woman's truest
maturity.
5. Men have secret struggles and silent
pains.should you ever find them out exhibit the
greatest maturity.
6. In the long-run your 'words' matters more to a
man than your 'looks'.so invest the right words.
7. Earn a man's respect and he will consider you
the yard stick 4 all his action.
8. Learn to mould the moods of your man.
9. Men wil naturally give u their futures if they
can recall your maturity in yesterday's issues..
10. Women are every where but queens are
scarce. Let the queen in you come alive and he
will hold you in high esteem.

sylvalord:
No i don't share your view. I think its cool to ridicule people in my posts and they are meant to accept it because i do not mock people just for naught, i do it to correct their errors. Plus i do it for the fun too because i am so cocky and i love it.

then u are a saddist in the making if not one already.

sylvalord:
*cocks head* Hey! I really don't appreciate people modifying the words in my post. That's impertinent don't you think?

but u appreciate mocking nd ridiculling people in ur posts nd mentions abi? That aint cool! Dnt u think so?

starlingslimnet:
Wrong assertion.... your biology teacher must be lumpheaded nincompoop..Blood flows to the penis thereby causing the dilation of the blood vessels which include Veins. ...So that make the vein protruded.And moreover it depends on the body build.

?? U can say what u know without abuses pls.

shockwave91:
no wonder. Dat ur skul is not normal

rest abeg!

ProphetUdeme:
youre speaking from experience and not biology cos i am a biologist and i dont know this, so stop lying

oga biologist dnt take it personal oo. It was my biology teacher dat told us. A female teacher at that, so take chill pill

natas22:
EXPERIENCE IS THE BEST TEACHER LWKMD

www.

na u sabi o

shockwave91:
na only u learn dis kind biology o. Wich class dem teach dis 1? Ss1, 2 or 3?

lol na for ss4A

sylvalord:
it means nonsense, bullshit e.t.c but I've found a new meaning for it; sylvalord

aiit. Tnx

sylvalord:
This is absolute bunkum

really? Oya what is bunkum? u sound like one of my friends

butanep:
hmmmmm... protruded veins on his thing...

Plz I don't get...

I mean the veins will be obvious. Oya I hv tried, ask others

There will be protruded veins in his thing if he is not a virgin. Nd the thing will be rough too. I know some ppl will want to know how I got the idea, its frm biology pls.

Weldone!

GoodFaith:
doing what
Please, after 100,0000 mileage
Now marriage before doing it
Go roll back the mileage first

doing the "do" secondly, do u know me? Biko direct ur grudge to the ppl u know nd sure of. Tnx

Story!

Hazardd:
.
American is direct and simple..
So tell us your own rule

marriage before "doing"

Hazardd:
Which one do you like African or foreign...

none!

African vs Foreign relationships:

WHITE GIRLS:
1st date: Coffee
2nd date: Kiss
3rd date: Sex

AFRICAN GIRLS
1st date: Fast food
2nd date: Hug
3rd date: Chinese restaurant
4th date: Kiss
5th date: Attempted sex but failed
6th date: Shopping
7th date: Cinema, new phones, more shopping
8th date: Attempted sex but failed
9th date: RAPE!!!
When are we going to change this Rule

agarawu23:
God pls give me a Lady that will manage my "garri" with me

not a lady that will be pointing "eatery" but can't work for money (Amen)

lols

Why are guys taking it personal na? Lols

Prayer of a heartbroken fellow

babyosisi:
Na to just comot cloth begin do like mad person or begin dance like persin wey get marine spirit

lol

Tiff!

Lol . This is serious!

A 4Year Old girl walks in while
her father is dressing
in the bedroom. She look at his
privates and points
at his.And ask “Dad whats That
thing between your legs?” Dad replies “I dont
know” She goes to the
kitchen and finds her mom “Mom
whats That long
thing between dads legs her
mom instead of explaining things to her she
replies “I dont know” A
week later when her mom was
coming home from
work the little girl ran to her
and says “mom you refuse 2 tell me the name of
That thing between
dads legs. I have finally figured
it out myself its a
toothbrush the mom
laughs,then ask her “how do you know that” the little girl
explains......When i
came back from pre-school this
Morning i saw aunty
Joyce(the Maid ) kneeling in
front of Dad, brushing her teeth with dads toothbrush
and sure enough,
There was toothpaste all Over
her mouth. Mom
fainted.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO ? A woman tells her husband that she is going to visit her sick mum in the village. She goes on Friday and returns on Sunday, with plenty of fruits and food stuff, saying they are from her mum to the husband and the children. The husband gently asks her about her mother's health and how she was doing, to which she replies that she took her to the hospital in the village and she is recovering and getting better. The wife adds that her mother insisted that she must re-visit the village in a few days, to spend at least a week with her. "I'm worried about Mama" the wife crooned, with tears swelling in her eyes. "She'll be fine, dear." Hubby lovingly replied. The husband then politely asks her to take the items to the kitchen. As she enters, she meets her mother preparing food in the kitchen. Apparently, her mum came visiting since the Friday that she left home. You can imagine the plight of this woman. stuck, shocked, dazed and dumbfounded at the kitchen door! whether to go in and drop the items' from mama', or return to her hubby in the living room! How would you handle this case? Your humble opinion is required.

Nice ass. So if guys have it wat ar they looking for in girls? Just asking though

A lecturer walked into the lecture room and
announced that there would be an
emergency test, and he went
straight to the board to write the instructions as: 1.
Time is 15 minutes
2. No copying
3. No cancellation of answer
4. You can open your text book or notebook.
5. Once it's 15 minutes raise your pen and walk out
of your desk. He then told the students to get set and
he began to dictate the questions one
after the other.
Question Number one:
List your favorite foods. Immediately, students began
to list. Guys were writing: pounded yam, fufu, egusi
and eba, while the posh girls went ahead to list: hot
dog, shawarma, pizza,
jambalaya, spaghetti bolognese. The lecturer then
announced the number two question:
Explain how to prepare/cook your favorite foods that
you listed above? OMG! You need to see how the girls
started cancelling their previous answers and
changing it to: garri soaking, porridge, tea etc. Haba
Ladies

1) A guy asked u for sex and u asked, "Do u Love
me?". What do u expect him to say or Are U a
LEARNER ?
2) Half naked girls are hot, while well dressed
girls are beautiful... Hell is hot, while heaven is
beautiful... the choice is yours
3) You have been engaged to him for 2 years and
no wedding is forth coming. Please kindly remove
the ring. Is your finger
a key holder?
4)You have slept with over 10 girls without
protection yet you go to the barbers shop with
your
personal clipper. What are you
preventing
5) Guys always know who their heart belongs to,
so if you like cook chicken in diamond sauce
or do monkey style in bed, if its not you, It can't
be you
6) In America wen a couple go to bed dey say
"Good nights my love" In Britain "Sweet dreams
darling" In Nigeria "Did u lock d Gate, doors &
windows?
7) You cannot say "I can't date you, I have a
boyfriend" and be asking for money from him. Gt-
bank staff cannot receive salary from UBA bank!

9) No Guy will ever tell a Lady "i ve a GF" when
asking her out. Their National Anthem is "we
had issues & we've broken up"
10) Welcome to Nigeria where the
government is responsible and
blamed for every damn things. if
mosquito bite you, you will blame the government
11) No guy is single, you either snatch him from
someone or share him with someone, the most
important thing is to be the highest Shareholder.
12) I woke up today, someone somewhere just
took their last breath. Thank You God for
blessing me more than I deserve
13) 35yr old first class graduate without job and u
dey follow
Lil'Wayne sing 'I Ain't Got no
worries' ... your life is on SOS
14) Idiot girl said: "I dated him for GOOD 10 years
and he broke my heart" fool, what's GOOD in the
years?
15). (a)Sex won't make him love u (b). A baby
won't make him stay. If you're doubting me,
kindly ask TUFACE...
16) No matter how nice you are to a goat, it will
still eat your yam

17) You make his 'Dick' hard, u
carry him enter room, he don off shirt, then u
shout April Fool... My sister, he will RAPE ur
Destiny!!
18) What shall it profit a girl to have all the
Brazilian hair in the whole world and still lose her
boyfriend to a girl on low cut
19) Kill an American citizen and 1
million policemen will be deployed to search for u
but kill 1 million Nigerians U will be invited for
amnesty
20) Don't act like you have it all, even rich men
beg for pen in the bank
21) No matter how big ur house
is, How recent your car is,or how
huge ur bank account is, Our grave is still gonna
be the same size, stay humble
22) No Matter How Pretty Or
Cute your Face Might Be,yo U Will Still Be the
Food For Worms.... Set your Arrogance Aside and
Remember 6 Feet. No one lives for Ever...