₦airaland Forum

Babaheekmat:
I understand your pain. Letting go would ease it all..

At least.. Recognize him as your pa.. Other things might be denied. Zero affection... Hmm..

Mehn.. If your wife offend you.. How will you forget and won't hold on to it even after apologizing

If my.wife.leaves for 15 years i would never take her back because that clearly states her stand on her feelings towards me. She never cared and never will.

Lol. Hilarious.

Babaheekmat:
Mehn.. I fear you..

But you don't fear someone who left his unborn baby and came calling after 16 whole years? I fear you more. Are you a baby daddy too?

ubunja:
Green Lights are an invitation to approach and present your romantic case because the girl sees you as a viable romantic partner. Simple. I don't know what men think green lights are.

Thats because you are not a man. How can you know what men think? Are you top or bottom in the gay cartel? Pray tell.

Now i have a special prayer for you. That frustration that made you think of starting a gay movement on NL will be with you into 2020 and forever after. Amen.

You will never have cause to stop writing crap because you will never find that cougar you are obviously desperately searching for at 60. You will be that lazy ass broke gigolo until death comes knocking at your door Amen.

Has your maami enrolled in Evening School yet?

juman:
Go and watch paternity court and maury show and related shows, then you will realize the importance of knowing your dad and mum.

How grand mother cry to know her father.

Well.i never and never will. There is no hard and fast rule but i guess its because the deadbeat dads are quite callous so their children are usually unforgiving. They may want to know him but certainly they will not want to associate with him. To each his own though.
Whats his relevance?

Skepticus:
Your obsession with Ubunja is becoming a pathetic one. Seeing that your moniker was created some days ago, says a lot.

It's unhealthy!

And how obsessive is Ubunja constantly and consistently spreading hate for women? How obsessive is it that he recycles the same dumb write ups with five crap words women, hoe,pvssy, gold digger and redpiller? Thats all.be says.

Babaheekmat:
Explain

I am a victim of such and i never looked for him
When he decided to.look back after several years, i simply walked him out. There was zero affection. All i felt was hatred.

juman:
Normally the girl would like to know her true father.

By just informing her that there is a man outside there claiming to be her father is enough for the man.

The girl would look for him.

You will.be surprised that she will just be as hard hearted as her biological.father. She may never look for him.

BRATISLAVA:
She would've know and seen the signs. It doesn't happen overnight.

May anyone you not experience it o. Sometimes the signs are totally absent.

BRATISLAVA:
Lol. I don't know why females never learn. Maybe they think that a pregnancy would make the man love them.

And what about fathers that walk away from their wives and 6 kids. Its not about not learning dude. Once a man chooses to be irresponsible. It is what it is

govomotors:
Please forgive, forget and allow the young lady unite with her real dad. All these while the walked away father have been his own prisoner of conscience. Although, the walked away Father cannot repay your family but I can assure you, he will do everything he can to make peace.

And for your sister, she cannot hide the news any longer from the walked away father. As a wise man make use of this opportunity and arrange a meeting,

Be wise and make this period of celebration joyous to all even at NL.

So that he can go and use her for money rituals. If he ever loved his daughter he wont be able to abandon her for 16 whole years.

Xylan7:
Just like #biafrareform said"what has happen has hpn,allow the men to in touch with his daughter.. Depriving her of the truth will cause great harm in future if she hpn to fiind out that the man she's regarding to has her dad ain't the biological dad,she will hate you guys more than you can ever imagine..


I know how traumatized your family might feel,tell her everything she need to know nd allow her to decide her faith by herself..

#xylan7

The same "what has happened has happened" is the same reason that the deadbeat dad should understand that it has "happened" that another man has become the father of that 16 year old girl.

Life goes on.

oodua1stson:
right now I'm currently taking care of a child that is not my sperm but I'm not deluded. I know one day the real father might pop up and rightly so. He needs to have access to his child and I will allow it. It doesn't matter that he has not spend a dime on him

Yeah right.

Sam2310:
Most women always forgive Men of their wrongs but Most Men with always support their own(male), that why most nairalander with support that Man(father).
Assume is the mother that left the child.
You will be surprised of all kind of comment, range from insult and abuse(something like she a prostitute, she is gold digger etc)

OP, Make sure the entire family come ooo not the Man along. Because the Man may have a good heart and his family may not, which may be dangerous for the child.

U can't lose her Love, let your mind be at rest.

cc biafrareform

So if the family comes means they can open their hearts and see what is inside? Lol.

Mcbayo:
Give the girl to the rightful sperm donor jare

Are you a sperm donor?

uruba23:
It is easy to judge the man and not the circumstances leading to the pregnancy. Anyway let the child know her father, most times the families won't say the real truth, no man normally would deny his kid if he is truly sure it is kid, except of course they are doubt's.

The circumstances he held on to and disappeared for 16 years is the sane reason why he should get lost now. The circumstances have still not changed. So what does he want.

adanny01:
I get it, you are hurt and insulted by their actions.

However, dont make a fuss about it. The biological father has rights you dont have, so dont go down that way.

I suggest you guys sit her down and tell her. She will most probably wanna meet her dad, you better let her. She is not a lottle girl and you have done the best for her. If she appreciates, she will treat you guys as her first and only family. You cant force anything on her since she will in a few years have full right to choose where she lives.

Sit her down in a family meeting style and drop the news and tell her the family who want her now didn't want her when she was still in the womb and for the 16years of her life until now.

Tell her you are not letting her go, and would fight them with every thing you have but she has to decide to be with the only family she has ever know.

I trust that she will do the right thing. Most kids in such situations will just want to meet with their other family and get over the feeling of not knowing.

And the childs rights to welfare and education. Where was the father to ensure those rights are not flouted? He has lost all rights bro. He is nothing but a sperm donor.

poik:
I think I like the sound of this idea. At the end of the day the child must know her father. But then the man must also be punished for the negligence. Good idea.
Triple the actual amount and refuse to step down or no deal.

Its not a must because there are kids in orphanages that dont know both parents. Some were picked from dumpsites. Are they not alive?

Tajbol4splend:
Legally if the guy had denied the pregnancy, does he still have the right to the girl?

Nope.

Babaheekmat:
who would not want to

I wouldn't.

MrBrownJay1:
instead of thinking of money, think of the CHILD 1st and foremost.



so because a person is useless, you should lie to a child about who her father is? why dont you just tell this child:"this is your useless biological father who abandoned you at birth." et voila!

its funny how all of you people claim to be holier than thou people, yet do no follow what your holybooks brainwashes you to do. your Bibles/Qur'ans tell you to forgive and forget, but here you are as bitter individuals. lol!

I hope you also forgive and forget when some asshole puts your daughter in the family way, abandons her and your grandchild and comes knocking 32 years after.

Larrykaysail:
give him his bill on Feeding , education and stress of motherhood. If he can pay

So that he can use the child for money rituals and get his money back. You people dont understand ruthlessness.

Obason22:
The truth is that u cannot take d love of a child away from his father or mother, but we most undstd in other way round that d same people that denied d child wen at womb are d same people coming to claim d child now @ 16. for instance a friend of mind was once a victim of such at, he was 28 but most of time people do accuse him that he does not no his father, on one faithful day he went straight to his mother and demanded to no his real father, d mother taught it was joke not until he brought out insecticide, that moment changed everything d cry of his mother attracted neighborhood but eventually d same man that said no wen he was in womb turn round to say yes and at 28 he has finished primary, sec. sch. and even went further to server as apprentice at main market onisha, and became master of his own, so my brother u have done well by her up bringing and best u do for her is to reunite her with her real father she will ever remain greet full but that does not stop u asking d man to pay for her up bringing if u wish.

What love?

Obason22:
The truth is that u cannot take d love of a child away from his father or mother, but we most undstd in other way round that d same people that denied d child wen at womb are d same people coming to claim d child now @ 16. for instance a friend of mind was once a victim of such at, he was 28 but most of time people do accuse him that he does not no his father, on one faithful day he went straight to his mother and demanded to no his real father, d mother taught it was joke not until he brought out insecticide, that moment changed everything d cry of his mother attracted neighborhood but eventually d same man that said no wen he was in womb turn round to say yes and at 28 he has finished primary, sec. sch. and even went further to server as apprentice at main market onisha, and became master of his own, so my brother u have done well by her up bringing and best u do for her is to reunite her with her real father she will ever remain greet full but that does not stop u asking d man to pay for her up bringing if u wish.

Nonsense. If the mother had also thrown him away and he had died on the streets would the father have come for his corpse?

kingjrofficial:
sorry bro.......there is nothing u can do about it, if he goes to court, u will lose.... pls do the needy and protect ur dignity and value in front of ur nephew....

#Peace

No.he wont lose. What happened to the dead beat dads dignity and value for 16 full years?

Shollze:
I have a friend that this is still going to happen to in the future. Her so called boyfriend that got her pregnant disappeared, she went through the pregnancy alone and raising the child alone. Things like this happens a lot .... just let the child know the father, you have no control over that.

And you havent thought that she may not want to know him?

virginchaser:
Be deceiving yourself. The girl will locate the father when the time comes.

There no hard and fast rule to.that. I never looked for mine and when he showed up at 15. I showed him the door. Nonsense.

juman:
The man should do dna test to confirm he is the real father.

Will he force the 16 year old to a lab? Lol. DNA for where. He lost it.

Ecne:
Damn! God just picked that girl's call.
She go de flex 3 Dads be that: YOU (the main Dad IMO), the step-Dad and her biological Father.

Bro, don't prevent her from knowing her real Dad please, before she go date her blood Brother (or Cousin) in the future ooo

Kai! 16 years kwa... the Mom no try sha oooo

Her real dad prevented himself first. So if they prevent him now. He should deal with it.

BarryLondon007:
Regardless he is still the father
Leave story
Shit happens

Let the "shi*t" happen to your daughter first. Then come back to comment.

showafrica:
I no no why they are wasting time, just tell the real dad to pay 10m or 30,000usd for all the upkeep so far.. and hand her over her daughter. Use the money go born and train ur own.

Nonsense.

Samsonklin:
Lol sorry bro. But you can never win this. Except he's broke and a coward. All similar cases like this this that i know always ends up the same. The motherf.ckerx always come back after a while and claim their kids. Blood is blood.

Blood isnt blood dude. My father tried the same rubbish when i was 15 and i told him to get lost. You can never reap where you did not sow. Those were my exact words to him.