₦airaland Forum

EFCCAbuja:
So you guys have not heard what happened to dodo

Nigga pleasebleep out this thread and stop spamming too

EFCCAbuja:
poverty runs in your generation down to your blood bastard.

Is like something is wrong with this guys

EFCCAbuja:
poverty runs in your generation down to your blood bastard.

Na road dem born you put olofo.

Fake Efcc wannabe

Efcc kill you there.

Efcc kill your mama

Kil your whole generation.

As i trodded into my temporary death, i heard Osa shouting Ah, na meat do you like this. But i was too weak… i woke up again but I didn’t fo on my accord, Osa shook me virgously and was like guy, guy, wake up. Make we carry this remaining meat go like that. Make we goo, make we dey go……his voice very faint from afar i my head i passed out again. I woke up again and at first I thought i was being kidnapped. Then i saw Osa driving, it didn’t even take long after i woke up that we arrived in the shrine. He must have been driving for a while. He’d stuff the body of the other four into sack made body bags, put then at the back of my truck and put the live afin in the back seat and myself. We got to the shrine, first thing he did was to unbolt the car trunk and dropped the bodies in the bag. Brought the other afin and tied her to a stake erected somewhere by the side of the shrine. I just say make i look around Small, to my left was a familiar frail figure. It took the Shape of the former Comerade, Baba and yes!!!! It was Baba.. he was holding a hunters gun. I guess i saw him just in time. GBAOOOOOOOO!!!!! Osa dropped to the floor I thought he died, i looked in Baba’s direction hands in the air while he was reloading the English speaking weapon.. Osa then got up no bleed signs, no penetration signs. Baba looked slightly surprised at his comeback. Completed his reload, gun corked and another GBAOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Maybe this time there was an impact, just like a boxer hits the Floor of the ring, refree towers above, one! two!! three!! Osa got up again, no penetration, no visible marks, no blood signs but he looked fatigued. Again Baba looked suprised yhen he suddenly remembers something, touches the ground 3 times, corks again, then shoots again!!!! Impact, blood on the chest area and Osa couldn’t get up. Was he waiting for Baba to expend all his bullets, why did he not run? Thoughts echoed in my head.

EFCCAbuja:
you are just a foolish lagos tout.

Stop this fight.

Haakeem:
bross a ko tọka si ọ ṣugbọn akọrin
akọkọ ti orukọ rẹ n jẹ dodoatire no be ur real name na.

Na the name wey people bin don dey call me dey come from small be that and me sef i dey maintain am dey go. Afterall, trutth be told i like the food no be lie and na only one life dey.

Athemisia:
We are not referring to you but the main character in your story. Remember you didn't give us his name at the beginning.

Walahi you got me laughing with this your comment.

So because i no put name, una come use my own name fill in the blank space. Chai

DSC7:
...

Na you still be the pastor because na you we know ....

Chai. No worry, many names dey wey you go still call me

dodoatirice:
Bros, I’ve never attempted rituals,
I’m sleeping on my bed two eyes closed,
The only time wey my eye dey open na if i wan go check on my pikin dem for their room.
Anu ni morigba
Lets be guided.

Fiction!
Fiction!!
Fiction!!!

Don’t attack the messenger


Note: Na Btc Hepp my life

Buy the dipp guy,
I bought the dippp.

If you come read chronicles of a pastor nkoor??
You go took say i be pastor too abi?

DSC7:
Nawaooo ...

Wahala no dey finish ooooo......

Dodoatirice if not for God's Grace upon ur life you for don die since.....

Many keyboard warriors no see things reach you and dem don dey 6feets....

Bros, I’ve never attempted rituals,
I’m sleeping on my bed two eyes closed,
The only time wey my eye dey open na if i wan go check on my pikin dem for their room.
Anu ni morigba
Lets be guided.

Fiction!
Fiction!!
Fiction!!!

Don’t attack the messenger


Note: Na Btc Hepp my life

Buy the dipp guy,
I bought the dippp.

I rang Baba again, e noor pick, so i guess he had maybe a persona-Vendetta against me so I shrugged it off and the four albinos came into view again. Dem noor just talk. I started wondering the kain Jazz dem take nack dem chai. Another was if police just take style enter my aparte like this now shey no be another wahala be that like this. Afin merin, for my kaba chai. I called Osa’s number till past midnight. E noor pick oo and e dey ring. Then for one moment, i just stopped dialing and small sleep just carry me go, e never even carry me reach front….. you know i knew i was dozing off gradually, I’d open my eyes because i knew anything could happen if i slept, but that sleep stubborn small eyes go close again… in a brief moment, i closed my eyes again and this time did not open it for like close to five minutes. There was no nightmare as it always happened before. That five minutes sleep e enter well well, as i open my eyes from my sleep position on the couch, towering above me were the albinismAlbinos that i brought in earlier, all four of them towered above me. See breast as he be like orange, orange wey dem never peel, different shapes and sizes all four of them. Wetin come wake me up from my sleep well well was the fact that they were stark nacked.

“What- whatt what’s happening here please” i managed to blurt out. I tried to gather myself together by Sitting on my back, na so the eldest afin just use him hand press me for the sofa, e come be like say he get bone pass me. Then one by one the other three took turns to sit on my dick back to back to back to back before i passed out. I woke up and my flacidd duck laid there carelessly like a kid that was born with a silverspoon. As these werey see say i don wake ehn, naim the three wey fucxx me before come hold me, their oga sef wan knack. Ahhhhh. As dem hold me wey my Amaju Pinnikk no stand, naim the eldest start to dey cry, the other soon joined in the crying, then the eldest went to the kitchen to get a knife, as sge dey carry the knife come, i said to myself, Tie Ta!!! Just like Baba had said earlier before he cut my phone off. As She emerged in the lounge again, the other 3 one by one went to her and She one by one maimed them. One by one, come see blood plenty blood for my sitting room chai. It was very bloody, then the remaining albino, jumped on me, ofcourse i was too weak to do anything, she looked at me observing me for a moment. “This girl, (abeg na (i said in my weak mind), this noor be resident evil na”


Then the door to the front entrance flunged open and Osa was standing bewildered, the vision in my eyes were stuttering like weak PHCN light, i passed out again.

dodoatirice:
Contnd:
I already ordered the albino meat wey wey go carry go. But he didn’t come back home so we could both go to the shrine again for renewal of the pot. But Osa no come house. I waited from sun up to sundown, e noor come. I traced him to places I thought he could be he noor dey. Wtf! We were supposed to get this done for reals. I already picked up the albinos, i even had to drive them from the pick up locate to my house. I left them in the car for close to 5 hours but i left the car running on Ac. Dark tints dey so no problem. My eyes no come gree take am again, i carry dem enter house order food order drink. Them no gree chop, them noor gree talk, dem just dey look like sunglasses. Morning o night o, its always up, too dumb, you fit bend the hand sef. I frustrate, i come call former comrade, Comrade Baba for the gods

Me:
(Baba the Baba na your boy they rep from this side over)

Baba:
(E norr tokk)

Me:
Ahn Baba na, no be so, i know say you dey vex but but….

I explained things to him and he listened throughout my story-rants then when i got to the part where i said pot broke and the part where i said four albinos were looking at me like zombies at the moment and they looked like they’d strangle me over the night if we refuse to proceed to do the rites. I rounded up my tale and waited for him to give me Intel.


Me:
(Helloo comerade B.F.T.G help mena wetin make i do)


Comerade B.F.T.G :

(Static radio tuning on the other end, clears throat)

Ti et ta!

Static radio tuning on the other end continues,) (Long Beep) offline.

Me:
Comerade!
Comerade!!
Com- Comerade!!!
(Looks at the phone screen like I don’t know what already happened,)
Ah oti cut!!

BFTG
Baba for the gods

dodoatirice:
I’m Busy guys I’m so sorry.
Short Busy Update:

I got a call from the security guys in my estate, then I went ahead to pick Osa, nigga came out of the wreckage with just a scratch here and there. He came inside, went to his room/power room, stayed there till evening, i had forgotten input the pot in tone compartment inside the kitchen cabinet. Him dey, meself i dey.. then i heard something like an explosion in the kitchen.. it wasn’t that loud so to say, but we both heard it. I dashed to check it out, pot broken, money everywhere like say militant enter there detonate money bomb!! Everywhere for kitchen tear.. money even fall from the kitchen windows outside.. but the pot was broken and I didn’t understand it. I was going to shut the kitchen door to go Call Osa i no know say himself don dey come, this time na Ghana must go e carry. DUDE!!!! e still noor send. E pack money full the Bag sotey i no know wetin i go do. Naim he come tell me say we go go that shrine again say this particular pot don finish work. His Intelnwas that we’d go in two days and i needed to make provisions for Albino meat wey we go use as he called it.

Contnd:
I already ordered the albino meat wey wey go carry go. But he didn’t come back home so we could both go to the shrine again for renewal of the pot. But Osa no come house. I waited from sun up to sundown, e noor come. I traced him to places I thought he could be he noor dey. Wtf! We were supposed to get this done for reals. I already picked up the albinos, i even had to drive them from the pick up locate to my house. I left them in the car for close to 5 hours but i left the car running on Ac. Dark tints dey so no problem. My eyes no come gree take am again, i carry dem enter house order food order drink. Them no gree chop, them noor gree talk, dem just dey look like sunglasses. Morning o night o, its always up, too dumb, you fit bend the hand sef. I frustrate, i come call former comrade, Comrade Baba for the gods

Me:
(Baba the Baba na your boy they rep from this side over)

Baba:
(E norr tokk)

Me:
Ahn Baba na, no be so, i know say you dey vex but but….

I explained things to him and he listened throughout my story-rants then when i got to the part where i said pot broke and the part where i said four albinos were looking at me like zombies at the moment and they looked like they’d strangle me over the night if we refuse to proceed to do the rites. I rounded up my tale and waited for him to give me Intel.


Me:
(Helloo comerade B.F.T.G help mena wetin make i do)


Comerade B.F.T.G :

(Static radio tuning on the other end, clears throat)

Ti et ta!

Static radio tuning on the other end continues,) (Long Beep) offline.

Me:
Comerade!
Comerade!!
Com- Comerade!!!
(Looks at the phone screen like I don’t know what already happened,)
Ah oti cut!!

I’m Busy guys I’m so sorry.
Short Busy Update:

I got a call from the security guys in my estate, then I went ahead to pick Osa, nigga came out of the wreckage with just a scratch here and there. He came inside, went to his room/power room, stayed there till evening, i had forgotten input the pot in tone compartment inside the kitchen cabinet. Him dey, meself i dey.. then i heard something like an explosion in the kitchen.. it wasn’t that loud so to say, but we both heard it. I dashed to check it out, pot broken, money everywhere like say militant enter there detonate money bomb!! Everywhere for kitchen tear.. money even fall from the kitchen windows outside.. but the pot was broken and I didn’t understand it. I was going to shut the kitchen door to go Call Osa i no know say himself don dey come, this time na Ghana must go e carry. DUDE!!!! e still noor send. E pack money full the Bag sotey i no know wetin i go do. Naim he come tell me say we go go that shrine again say this particular pot don finish work. His Intelnwas that we’d go in two days and i needed to make provisions for Albino meat wey we go use as he called it.

Nigga, are you here?? Or there?? Its Pricey. Very pricey. What people do for money. Them say money na visitor, na lie. Money na Passenger. Chibuzor and Chika ooo, them my brotherhood. Them broooke like poop. 2 months after i Gbera, naim themselves Gbera. But their own type of Gbera.. two tight niggas, na me come go sabi them we come be friends. You know this age of peer-pressure and pepper them Socialism. Dem come dey bomb. Holly way oo. Na so two of them first pick 36, 36 millions each. Niggas for street come link up gbas. Dem first buy two Benz one for themselves each. Them come turn OG unto dating level. I can say that, the week they picked, Chibuzor mama no dey Lagos, Chika Mama no dey Lagos. Their mum both returned to Lagos at the same time at the end of the said week. Getting home, their kids now had Benzema’s dem dey form O.G, i Sabi work. Etc. na so one by one their Mama call them enter house. Chika to him Mama, Chibuzor to him Mama sef.

Then They respectively from the privacy of their homes held one on one talk sessions with them both.

Mama Chibuzor:
Weh done my son. I happy for una money wey come so. But the thing wey dey there be say, you know say me and Maama (Nkechi) we travel go Village? Ehn ehn, e get something wey we go do me and Mama Nkechi. You and Chika una go dey kill cow every month for me. If una fit dey kill da Coowu every month una money go dey come dey come una go fear.

Chibuzor tries to say something but Mama Chibuzor cuts him off with a stern hand gesture and continues

Chibum! Make i talkieee. Make you and Chika make una dey kill this Cooowu every month e dey very important. Na me and Mama Nkechi go stand for una for where we go. This poverty don do for this family. But una must to dey kill tge Coowu every month Obim, Ezenwa, if you noor do am, e mean say i don go be that.

Chibuzor:
Okay no worry Mama i nooor go forget, i go do am.

Now picture these dialogue between mother and son, the same dialogue must have happened at Mama Nkechi’s House with Chika.

They splurged their 36million naira till end of that month and then they killed one one cows respectively as their mother had instructed. That new month, everywhere tear, town red and na these boys paint am. 3, 4 more months of cow slaughtering. Naim lockdown jamm dem for Europe wey dem go flex. They missed it and the month rolled into a new month. Their mama dry like stock fish before them see chance enter Hood. As them enter hood lasan the town they once painted red held a candle night precision for both of them.

The bike man no Get change, but we don settle am. I don reach.

I put Baba on Ring ring, he didn’t pick, i put the pot in the kitchen cabinet, locked the compartment, drove to my estate gate and put the security guys that manned the check in check out that if he came back gey should ring my home first. Gave them beer money and drove out.

Kiss Daniel Vado song Dj Spinnall.

Baba
Baba
Baba
Baba
Sebi you want the banger di banger baba
O gbologbo de ni baba o baba
You can never top on Spinall baba
Never top on Vado baba
Aye ti mo wa ko sere baba
Omo ti mo do ko le salaye baba
Oya oya work for the mula baba
I say whine for the baba o baba
Oya dab


First hail the Baba the Baba wey dey run your matter
Baba o
Baba o
Baba o
Baba o

Shebi you want the banger the banger
But baba is an Original SG (spiritual gee)
(Self hailing)
(Self hailing)
The life wey i come no play play
The hoelowshow wey i Bleep i no fit explain
Fast Fast work in this money for me

Then the money comes after the visit to Baba. Rich people doings

Hahahahahahaha a ma nowo selese
Baba l’emi si won o l’emi si won
Owo yapa
Oya dab
E kira fun baba baba o baba o baba o
Baba l’emi si won l’emi si won

Hahahahahahahahaha we will spend money til it hurts and bleed
Na Baba i be to them
Money is plenty
Twaley for the Baba (spiritual Gee) Baba o Baba o Baba o


Conversation between the Now Baba Olowo and him assistant wey noor know wetin dey sup. Him assistant wey noor know say After Babalawo, Na BabaOlowo you go see.

Elo n mo ti na na N20 million ni sire
N20 million pere beni sir
E lo ko bundle tuntun wa jhor oya dab
But ba ba aye kan lo wa
But ba baba sowo yen emi n mo lowo
Ki lo n se e baba e ma nowo mo o e ma nowo mo o
E kowo mi fun mi
Vado lo n play e ma nowo mo o baba

BabaOlowo: How much i don spend sef?
Ass: SIR!!!!! JUST TWENTY MILLION SIR!!!!!!!!!
BabaOlowo: Go bring new Bundles jarey
Ass: BUT BUT BUTTTT BABA
BABAOLOWO: Na one life dey
Ass: BABA NO SPEND MONEY AGAIN, NO SPEND MONEY AGAIN
BABAOLOWO: wetin dey do you, OYA GIMMIE ALL MY MONEY.

He pack money come pack pot join? I no see my pot for where e dey inside my room and him don go. Dhey this one dey wynn himself ni. Oggar affar, naim i follow suit, in the compound obviously he’d left in his car, i got in my car amd zoomed off supposedly after him. But he hadn’t gone too far off… i sped up and was bumper to bumper with him. And I’d have thought for a brief, he’d checked into his rear view and stepped on the gas. Na that day i know say, its the driver and not the car. The moment he stepped on the gass and whizzed forward like something that was going forward ever, it took me like half a minute to process what happened. But i switched the gear knob to sport mode, and then stepped on the gas too. My pot of money was very very important abeg. Then the need for speed began. He’d have dusted and left me behind, but i knew the road too well and he didn’t. For a moment we were shoulder to shoulder, then ahead i realized that there was a big pot hole ahead, those type of pottttt hole that eas like an unwanted soeed bump or speed breaker, i eased the pressure on my throttle and he felt like he was winning the race, a full minute later, he’d bashed his car, another novice driver was trying to navigate the pothole, and Osa rammed into him from behind. Totaling his vehicle. And leaving an unwanted and costly damage on the other car because he was going at an abnormal speed. I parked just by the side of the road a stone throw and moved to inspect the ruin. I believed he thought i was checking to see if he was okay, but me i was checking for my pot. He was trapped in the wreck, i looked at his back seat and the bag and the money he stole from me sat there undisturbed. I grabbed the bag and left for my own car.. i moved before people barricaded my car.

I escaped the scene, Baba call ooooo I picked baba’s dial, and e just said. “Otiku” which meant “you don die”. Shey this man is mentally ni? I rang him back and he repeated the same thing. Death kwa? Then I thought or i felt he could still be hurt regarding the switch switch scenario or he could be serious. I got home and placed the pot where it was before and called baba again.


Baba:
Pikin wey no sabi anything you carry am put for house. Person wey no be anything, you carry am put for house.
Person wey be say as e dey do juju for you him life dey shorten.
Person wey don pour sand sand for your garri
I pity your mama.

He then ended the call again. “You pity my mama naim you allow make i use am” that line got my cracked up for a long long time that i thought i was exhibiting small signs of madness after i got a hold of myself. Then i face the reality inside wetin him dey talk. I put him on dial again.

.

Ara adugboo,
Dodo ti ji oo
Rice shin sun
Zazo zeh
Watimagbo.