“Talking to children about sex goes a long way to prevent sexual abuse”-Mrs. Bisi Ajayi-Kayode

Mrs. Bisi Ajayi-Kayode the Assistant Director of Cece Yara Foundation, a legal practitioner, and child advocate spoke with dailyfamily.ng about the importance of parents communicating with their children so as to prevent sexual abuse.

Cece Yara foundation was founded by Mrs. Bola Tinubu to help protect children from child sexual abuse and to generate awareness on how to prevent it.

She said: “Child sexual abuse usually occurs on one to one basis either when the child is alone with the perpetrator or alone in the chat room. Parents have to know the signs which can be physical, emotional or behavioural and there is the need to react positively to prevent child sexual abuse.

Talking to children about sex goes a long way to prevent sexual abuse. Children need to be empowered to say No to unwanted touches and parents need to establish safe boundaries.

Talking to children about sex needs to be done using age-appropriate language. This will encourage them to ask questions when they are concerned.

Also, children need to be taught about their private parts (including the mouth) that no one has the right to touch those parts and not to keep secrets from their parents and trusted caregivers.

Talking to children about sex should not be lumped up in one big talk as it could be overwhelming to the child rather it should be a routine conversation using everyday issues.


Parents should be actively involved in their children’s lives, in their daily activities, know the other trusted adults in their lives, know their digital identity that is who they are on social media, digital footprints- what they have been exposed to on social media and above all parents should know about digital empathy when children stumble on what upsets them on the internet and how to merge their online and offline values.

Parents should be realistic and educate themselves before talking to children about sex. The conventional ways of talking to children about sex will not resolve the present day challenges that sexuality has posed to the children.

Do not force the affection of other people on your children as they may accept it as normal when they are touched in a way that makes them uncomfortable.

The Cece Yara Foundation offers novel services to children in fighting child sexual abuse. Foremost is the CECE Yara Child helpline 08008008001. It is a toll-free number that is available 24/7.

Cases of child sexual abuse can be reported on this line. Also is the provision of a forensic interview. A forensic interview is the best way to gather information about the allegation of child sexual abuse. It is a single objective, non-leading, legally defensible and age-appropriate information gathering process which reduces the number of times the child will have to re-live the trauma of child sexual abuse.

The interview is conducted by someone trained in the technique of forensic interview and observed by representatives of the Multi-disciplinary team of Cece Yara foundation who are Child Protection agents.

The interview is recorded and used in the investigation and prosecution of the case without breaching the child’s confidentiality.”
https://dailyfamily.ng/talking-to-children-about-sex-goes-a-long-way-to-prevent-sexual-abuse-mrs-bisi-ajayi-kayode/

In an exclusive interview with DAILYFAMILY.NG, Mr. Akeem Durotoye, Head Domestic Operation services, Heritage Bank Limited, explains the processes involved in obtaining business fundings for SMEs and further explained Heritage bank’s take on funding speculative businesses.



Can you tell us more about SMEs?

SMEs (Small and Medium-sized Enterprises) as a federal government initiative, is to improve the entrepreneurial competition in states and to ensure that people are able to access funds to live their dreams in terms of business initiatives and in terms of what their passion is.

Is it that starters can’t access loans from your bank?

As with any other process, SMEs business funding comes with the required conditionalities. It is not true that starters can’t get loan but as a starter, you have to meet certain conditionalities attached to the SME for accessing the loan. If you are a starter and you are able to meet all the conditionalities, then definitely, you will have access to the loan.



What is your futuristic projection for speculative businesses?

See, speculative businesses are highly risky businesses we all know, the world over, not even peculiar to Nigeria or Lagos state as it is. But, speculative businesses that have a high probability of non-crystallizing in terms of the risk but has a high possibility in terms of the revenue potentials.


See, because whatever it is, be it speculative or the normal business, they have an element of risk and they have an element of uncertainty. So if the element of uncertainty is high than the element of risk, then speculative business is going to grow in the country because a lot of speculative businesses are on the rise in the country.

For instance, Sports betting in the past used to be an unknown business but now it’s increasing because the middle-income earners are now into sports betting and it is becoming real and a competitive force in Lagos state now.



So like I asked earlier, is it that Heritage bank will never fund Speculative businesses or are you looking at a time you will be able to fund it?

Of course. Just like I have explained, speculative business is on the increase and you know what, in life, somebody will bell the cat at some point before it will escalate and that is what we are saying here.

In the future, as events unfold we will see a lot of speculative businesses having access to funds and once they are able to have access to funds, we will see that a lot will happen in the speculative business and before you know it they will become the order of the day.
https://dailyfamily.ng/in-the-future-we-will-see-lots-of-speculative-businesses-having-access-to-funds-akeem-durotoye-heritage-bank/

“When they call me ‘Mummy twins’, I still wonder who are they referring to”-Mrs Bisi Ajayi-Kayode

Mrs Bisi Ajayi, a Legal practitioner and child advocate who had 15 years of waiting after she got married in the year 1998 and now a mother of twin boys shared her experience in an exclusive interview with dailyfamily.ng.

She spoke about how she and her husband went through a lot of trauma and sorrow through the 15 years journey of childlessness and now she is a mother of twins.

She shared her experience in this interview:

Can we meet you?

I am Mrs Bisi Ajayi, I am a Legal practitioner and a child advocate.

Tell us about your 15 years of waiting

I got married in February 1998, the experience was quite challenging and traumatic but with faith in God, having a good support from my parents, my siblings and the support of my parents in the Lord, Bishop Mike and Peace Okonkwo.

I thank God for my husband, it got to a stage, he gave his advice that we should go and adopt and I said no, God has spoken and we will hold Him by His word. I was having a number of fibroid surgeries that got him scared as they were life threatening, so, we kept holding on until finally after 15 years God blessed with twin boys.

How was the experience like?

The first day when I was told I nearly fainted as I could not believe it, two days later I went to the hospital to ask that are you sure I am pregnant and they yes you are.

The day I put to bed, Oh my! It was tears of joy, up till now when they call me Mummy twins, Mama Ejima, Iya Ibeji, I still wonder who are they referring to? God in his infinite mercy gave me double for my trouble.

How has been the experience raising the boys?

Wow! Fantastic, fantastic; you know when you look back, God made me to forget the 15 years of trauma, the frustration, pain, sorrow and agony, He filled the gap with Joy, anytime I see them, no matter what comes my way I say God, if you could allow me to have these children, there is nothing you cannot do.

How do you balance your career with parenting now?

There is balancing, I had to stay at home for about two to three years, doing some small businesses and private partnerships to get them stabilized a bit and now I’m back into child advocacy.
https://dailyfamily.ng/when-they-call-me-mummy-twins-i-still-wonder-who-are-they-referring-to-mrs-bisi-ajayi-kayode/

Mrs. Bose Fawehinmi speaks about the importance of counselors in marriage


Mrs. Bose Fawehinmi is a marriage counselor with her husband, Abayomi Fawehinmi. She spoke with dailyfamily.ng about the importance of couples having marriage counselors.


Mrs. Fawehinmi said even though she and her husband are marriage counselors, they still have those they go to for counsels when there are issues they cannot handle on their own.

She said: “Every marriage and every couple should have counselors. When we do pre-marital counseling we tell couples that between the two of them, they should nominate at least two people that in the event that they need to escalate an issue, they are free to discuss with this person or that person so that it won’t be like you are going to report me.”


Mrs. Fawehinmi also pointed out that a marriage counselor can help couples to shed more light on issues in their marriage as they both may have different stands on the issues.


She said: “It’s just like going to brainstorm with somebody like ‘e gbo o’; this is what I think, this is what he thinks, what do you think? This is the person that will help you look at it and then bring another light into it. So, it is good for you, you can never be too big for a counsel.”
https://dailyfamily.ng/mrs-bose-fawehinmi-speaks-about-the-importance-of-counselors-in-marriage/

Mrs. Bisi Ajayi, the Assistant Director of Cece Yara Foundation, a legal practitioner and child advocate against sexual abuse has enlightened mothers at Mamalette Live 2017 on how they can introduce sex education to their toddlers.

Dailyfamily.ng reports that Mrs. Bisi Ajayi and other panelists at the event, who spoke on sex education and on training children about sex, mentioned that it was important to start training children about sex as soon as they started talking.

She mentioned that the issue with most parents was that they didn’t know how to introduce sex education to their children.

Mrs. Bisi Ajayi said for parents to start training toddlers about sex and how to protect themselves from sexual abuse, it is important to let them know the parts of their bodies that are private.

She used herself as an example, she said: “For me, I train my four-year-old twin boys that private parts mean any part of their body they wear underwear to cover, I told them that it is private and no one has the right to touch it.”

The child advocate explained that it is important to teach toddlers this because if they don’t know, they can be easily taken advantage of by people they trust but knowing this will help them to avoid sexual abuse.

It was said during the session at Mamalette 2017, that training your child to be vocal could also help him/her to avoid sexual abuse.
https://dailyfamily.ng/how-to-introduce-sex-education-to-toddlers-mrs-bisi-ajayi/

The state team leader for NURHI Lagos, Dr. Edun Omasanjuwa, while speaking to dailyfamily.ng about the family planning methods that are available for men.

Dr. Edun Omasanjuwa is the state team leader for Nigerian Urban Reproductive Health Initiative (NURHI) Lagos, a project that is focused on ensuring quality family planning services are available across Nigeria and making sure that people are aware of the benefits of family planning.

It is commonly believed that most of the family planning methods are basically for women, but this medical doctor has revealed that there are also family planning methods for men.



He said: “For now, we have three options available for men which are abstinence, use of condoms and vasectomy. We don’t have any hormonal methods available for men yet but very soon we hope that once all the tests have been done we will have that also for men.”

Dr. Edun explained what vasectomy is about, he said: “Vasectomy is a permanent method, once a man is done having children, what it does is that the spermatic cord that carries sperm to the exterior is cut and tied. So, even though the man is still producing sperm, his semen that comes out does not have sperm in it.”
https://dailyfamily.ng/dr-edun-omasanjuwa-speaks-about-family-planning-methods-for-men/

The wife of the President of Timi David ministry, Pastor Mrs Olamide Timi David has revealed that marriages are breaking apart due to lack of sexual excitement.

Speaking to dailyfamily.ng, the pastor who is about to launch her book she wrote on Sex in marriage said marriages become boring when there is no more sexual excitement.

She said though couples at the beginning of their relationships enjoy so much intimacy but as time goes on; they allow that intimacy to fade away.

She pointed out the major things that affect sexual excitement in marriage as the day-to-day activities of couples like going to work, doing house chores and so many things that cause tiredness.

Pastor Mrs Olamide Timi David said: “Sex is a mind thing and must be done with determination; you must be determined to always meet your partner’s need whenever he or she needs it.”
https://dailyfamily.ng/exclusive-sexual-excitement-key-to-sustaining-marriages-pastor-mrs-olamide-timi-david/

The wife of the President of Timi David ministry, Pastor Mrs Olamide Timi David has revealed that marriages are breaking apart due to lack of sexual excitement.

Speaking to dailyfamily.ng, the pastor who is about to launch her book she wrote on Sex in marriage said marriages become boring when there is no more sexual excitement.



She said though couples at the beginning of their relationships enjoy so much intimacy but as time goes on; they allow that intimacy to fade away.

She pointed out the major things that affect sexual excitement in marriage as the day-to-day activities of couples like going to work, doing house chores and so many things that cause tiredness.


Pastor Mrs Olamide Timi David said: “Sex is a mind thing and must be done with determination; you must be determined to always meet your partner’s need whenever he or she needs it.”
https://dailyfamily.ng/exclusive-sexual-excitement-key-to-sustaining-marriages-pastor-mrs-olamide-timi-david/

The wife of the President of Timi David Ministry, Pastor Mrs Olamide Timi David gave advice to career women on parenting.

Pastor Mrs Timi David pointed out while speaking to dailyfamily.ng that it is important for women who are busy with their careers to try not to prioritize their jobs over family.


The woman of God revealed that as a graduate of Accountancy, she left her banking dream to work as an accountant in a small firm just to take care of her children.

She said: “A lot of women have made mistakes; some women value their jobs over their families. When the job stops suddenly or maybe they are sacked; they will see that they had jeopardized their families and they don’t have enough for their children. Their children don’t even have relationship with them but most children have relationship with the maids.”

Pastor Mrs Olamide Timi David gave her advice to career women, she said: “For you to be able to take care of your children as a mother, you need to sacrifice some things. Then you realize that when you sacrifice some things, you even make more.

I do not say they should not work but they should know that it is what they desire out of life that they will get. If care is not taken, you will lose a part of your children. God will ask you, how did you do it? How did you train your children?

I think we should not put money over our children’s welfare and well being. Money is good and it will come but it is important to make the right priority.”
https://dailyfamily.ng/parenting-advice-for-career-women-from-pastor-mrs-olamide-timi-david/

Pastor Blessing Lydia Oluwatunbi, a grade three (3) FIFA Referee and a Sports Coach/Mentor is the Founder and President of Blessing Liberty Foundation International, a Non-Governmental Organization (NGO) which focuses on the Youths and Teenagers.

The NGO organize Seminars to empower youths and teenagers and also go on Sexual Purity Campaigns. She is currently a PhD student at the University of Lagos.
In an exclusive interview with dailyfamily.ng, she spoke about how she has been able to manage career, ministry, studies and cope as a Female Sports Coach.

Can you tell us about yourself?
I am Blessing Oluwatunbi, I had my first degree in Physical and Health Education from the Unversity of Ilorin, a Masters Degree in Sports Psychology from the University of Lagos, I finished as the best graduating student and presently doing my PhD.
I run an NGO which focuses on Sexual Purity Campaign and Career Development for the young people. I am also a Grade Three (3) FIFA Referee which I got in 2006.

Why the choice of Physical and Health Education as a Lady?
I actually wanted to study Accounting as a Commercial student and I had good grades in my WAEC but I didn’t meet the cut-off mark in JAMB. I didn’t want to stay at home wasting time since my younger Sister was already in the University studying Medicine.

My Uncle told me I had four option which was Physical and Health Education, Sociology, French Education and Basic Technology. In that case, I decided to go for Physical and Health Education. Immediately I got to school I got a Mentor for myself, in person of Dr. (Mrs) Dominic who always encouraged me to put my heart to what I was doing and I have never had any regret. Studying Physical and Health Education has really helped my health I can’t just live anyhow or eat anything. I am a lover of sport and my major game is swimming.

How have you been able to manage being a Pastor, a Teacher and a Referee?
It has really been God and I also multitask and I believe every lady must be able to multitask. I don’t believe in one source of income so multitasking has really helped me. I hear God directly and this has really been of great help to me. Towing the path of righteousness really pays. Also, being a Single is really helping me to focus and I also enjoy multiple grace from God…. (cuts in..)

You just said you are still Single?
(cuts in…) giggled.. yes
Going by that, how have been able to manage the male folks both on the field and outside?
It has been by the grace of God and also I thank God for the kind of parent I have. The training I had as a young lady is really helping me. I came from a very solid foundation; my father is an Architect and Mum, a Quantity Surveyor and they are both Ministers of God who met and married themselves as Virgins.

My Dad has always told us to enjoy our lives as Singles and remain sexually pure. I won’t say there hasn’t been advances and proposals from males but at the end of the day, one just discovers they are not serious. I prefer to keep myself pure for God. I usually key in the word of God because at the age of 16 God spoke to them when I was terribly ill that he needed two things from me; my sexual purity and my obedience that If I can give Him, he will take me far in life. Whenever temptation comes, I always hear these words and also there will be the flash of the youths and teenagers I have told about sexual purity and so I just know I have to keep myself till I am married.

Do you also Coach Males or only Females and do they accept you?
Yes, I train both males and females. I am a Professional in my field so there is no rejection in any form.
Concerning getting married and raising your own family, are we looking at anything soon?
Laughs… I desire to get married and I also believe God to settle me down at the right time. I believe God has ordained each person’s spouse and at the right time, they will meet.
Looking at your family, being the first child what is the relationship like with your siblings and parent?
We are one very closely knitted family where the true love of God dwells. I have a very good and close relationship with both my parent and siblings. They have all been very supportive and encouraging. There is always this spirit of cooperation in the family, we have built that support system over the years.

What brought about your publication ‘THE PARABLE OF THR FOOTBALLER’?
Waoh! I actually saw an article on soccer and in 2015 I was invited to a new club they were launching then where they told me to make a write-up. It was there that it occurred to me that being a grade 3 FIFA Referee I can write something. So, with the help of my Father and Sister, we came up with something on Football because Football is the in thing now. So I just used the publication to preach on Football. After I printed and shared the first one thousand, I was called upon that some people were still in need of it and I had to print more. It has been accepted both within and outside Nigeria.

As a Referee which game do you play?
My major game is swimming but I love football though I am not a very good player I officiate. I actually have an idea about all the games. The background knowledge is really helping me.

What would be your advice to youths and teenagers?
My advice to young ones is that they should be focused and keep themselves pure. When you are sexually pure, your might is pure. They should embrace Jesus because when they have Him, they have everything.
https://dailyfamily.ng/exclusive-interview-with-nigerian-female-grade-3-fifa-referee/

6 Relationship Things You Should Not Tell Anyone
One of the most talked about things in groups of friends who are in a relationship are their partners.

Whether you’re looking for tips or telling trivia, women like to talk about relationships with their friends. Men also have the habit of talking about their partners with friends, but not as often as women.

And even if you trust your friends a lot, some of the relationship’s issues should never be told and it’s best to keep them a secret.

These issues when exposed can greatly disrupt the relationship with your partner, generate gossip and even creating embarrassing situations. That’s why you need to be aware of what you’re talking about at the time of that chat with your friends.


To help with this, check out the six things in the relationship you should never tell anyone to keep their relationship healthy and in harmony.

1. Sexual life
Undoubtedly it is the main and most controversial item on the list. Talking about your intimacy with your partner is never legal.

Your partner may feel offended by being exposed to this intimate factor. So never talk about what he likes or dislikes in bed or about your sexual experiences.

2. About what he does and bothers you
It’s not cool to talk or talk to your friends about the “different” habits your partner has, such as not changing socks every day or “nasty” things.

This will cause your friends to create a bad view of your husband and associate him with something disgusting.

3. About the lack of success in the work
If your partner is not having a good income at work or is far from getting a raise, keep it for yourself.

Exposing this in parallel conversations may make him feel unable to improve his own family’s financial situation.

4. Fears of your partne
Society imposes that men should not be afraid of anything, so if your partner has opened up about your dislikes with you do not comment on anyone.

Even if it’s a silly fear like cockroaches or thunder, listen and save it for yourself.

5. Errors he has already committed
Bringing sad memories that have passed through your relationship can generate conflict and hurt.

Rub rubber on the mistakes your partner may have made with you that have already been resolved.

6. Failures still unresolved
If your partner has a big bug that really bothers you, talk to him about it.

If you believe that it can improve it is better to talk directly with it than to expose it to friends who can criticize you more and increase the problem.
https://dailyfamily.ng/6-relationship-things-you-should-not-tell-anyone-2/

It has finally happened, the wedding day has come and gone. All the family members that came together for your joyous occasion have all gone back to their houses. Now all that is left is you and your spouse. Your goal at this stage is to have the ‘happy’ marriage that everyone has wished for you, but how do you start?

The following 8 tips may help you start your married life on a good note;

Tip 1: Invest in your marriage

Investing does not always require spending money. You invest in your marriage by spending time together. The dating that occured in the months and years leading up to your wedding should continue. Spending time together should do wonders to your new marriage.

Tip 2: Communicate with your spouse

You cannot afford to let the lines of communication die. Talk to your spouse, share your worries, your hopes, your goals and your dreams. Let your spouse know what is important to you.

Tip 3: Say nice things to each other

Simple words, like ‘thank you’ and ‘I love you’ go a long way. Remind yourselves daily with words of why you fell in love with each other.

Tip 4: Learn how to fight fair

Fighting fair means that when you have arguments, you don’t allow other issues to come in. It also means that even though you are angry with your spouse, you don’t say anything hurtful that you may regret later.

Tip 5: Treat your in-laws as you will your own family

Now that you are married, your in-laws have become family. Since there is no perfect family, you should learn to accept and love your in-laws as they are. After all these are the people who helped shape your husband into the man that he is today. Being respectful and polite to your in-laws will start your relationship on a good note.

Tip 6: Spend time alone

Being married does not mean you should spend time alone. Sometimes we need space, to think, do exercise, read a book etc. Spending time alone allows you to appreciate each others company better.

Tip 7: Start managing your finances from Day 1

You should start reading up on how to manage your finances.Cultivate a savings habit and make sure you don’t spend money on unnecessary expenses. Managing your finances well will place less stress on your marriage.

Tip 8: Have regular sex

An active sex life from Day 1 is what you want and should continue. Do what you have to do to make sure your that the energy levels of the early days won’t go down. Have regular sex and don’t be afraid to experiment with times, locations, frequency. Be spontaneous.

Having a nice wedding and good intentions may not be enough to produce a successful, happy marriage, however, the motivation and conscious decision of you and your partner to work on your relationship may help ensure that you have a happy long lasting marriage.
https://dailyfamily.ng/8-ways-start-married-life-good-note/

One day a young man asked his father, ” Father, how can I be sure my fiancée is in love with me?

The Father replied, ” my son, if your fiancée does some of the following 14 things, be reassured…. she is in love with you.”
The Father resumed:

1. If she doesn’t get upset when you contradict her opinion.

2. If she gets sad because of your sadness or seeing you angry.

3. If she always tries to create conversation topics with you.

4. If she always consults you before she do anything or make a decision.

5. If she is happy that you offer her something as trivial and simple as this thing can be.

6. If she’s always trying to help you or do chores for you to please you.

7. If she’s worried about you being gone.

8. If she strives to do what you love and forsake what you hate.

9. If she doesn’t care what you can earn (Silver).

10. If she overcomes patiently the pain caused to her because of you.

11. If she cares about what you do, what you love and seeks to be part of your world and your hobbies.

12. If she’s not ashamed of you or anything you can do.

13. If she respects you and defends you.

14. If she gives you what she thinks, before you learn from someone else.

If you find a woman with at least 5 of these qualities. … then marry her.
https://dailyfamily.ng/14-ways-to-know-she-truly-loves-you/

Do you think that a marriage can just grow without it been nurtured? Then you may be wrong. What are some of this?

1. Are together for the right reasons
You should not marry by pressure from family, friends or to make a good impression on society. You also should not get married because you think the relationship will improve or everything will be different after marriage. You need to get married by loving your partner and wanting to be with him forever.

2. The most important is not communication, but respect
The writer says that by analyzing the responses of people who lived together for 10 or 15 years, they said that communication was the most important part of a relationship. It sure is important. But when analyzing the response of couples with 20 to 40 years of coexistence, most answered that the most important thing was to maintain respect for the partner!

Mark believes that savvy people realize that no matter how open you are, one hour the divergent views of each will bring about conflict. And if there is no respect for what the other thinks and feels, small conflicts can be escalating and lead to greater hurts and disruptions.

But what would that respect be? An example given by Mark’s readers is not to speak badly of the spouse to his group of friends or family. Resolve your differences at home. To speak badly of the other in the back is a great demonstration of disrespect.

Respect the other’s space, your interests, hobbies, however much you are different from what you like.

3. You trust each other
“Do not have secrets, secrets divide you, always.” This was one of the valuable tips the writer received in this research.

If you feel uncomfortable with something that is happening in your relationship, speak openly to your partner. You will not be able to be happy with grievances. Talking about problems builds confidence and intimacy.

And trust is a key point in relationships. Do you trust your partner to take care of you if you get very sick tomorrow? Do you trust your partner to stay with your children for a period? Do you trust your partner to handle your money?

And if you do not trust, you may not be trustworthy either. For Mark, mistrust breeds mistrust. For example, if the partner starts snooping around for things he did not do, then you wonder why he is so insecure, and start wondering if the other is not hiding something from you.

4. A healthy relationship is done by two healthy people!
Understand that the responsibility of the spouse’s happiness within the relationship is not completely yours. “The problem is when all the happiness in the relationship is contingent on the other person and both people are in a state of constant sacrifice, just read it again.” That sounds awful,” comments Mark.

Always remember that first of all you are individuals, with your own identities and emotions, and you need to do things for yourself in your own time. Wanting to control the life of the partner or submit to this control is not healthy.

Never give up being the person who you are, love yourself for it! Having self-love makes it easier to love another person in a healthy way.

5. You will change over time!
Couples over 20 together have also raised an important issue: each one will change a lot over time! “We have changed faith, political parties, colors and numerous hair styles, but we love each other even more,” says one of Mark’s readers.

The tip of some couples is that you need to fall in love with this new person over and over again!

To make the union or marriage last, the above mentioned points are very important to note.
https://dailyfamily.ng/5-secrets-lasting-relationships/

5 Ways You Did To Ruin Your Relationship
Everyone thinks that it takes just a little effort to make the relationship work well. But those in it will readily agree that it takes more than that to make things work well. There have been a lot of tings that people do to ruin their relationships. What are few of this things?

1. Tiring and boring conversations.
When you make the conversations longer than expected, then it will be very difficult to enjoy the conversations. Never let the conversations just a one way thing. Make it come alive by the number of lovely conversations that ensures. Try a number of approach and see if it will work out.

2. Failure to express your need
When you have decided to explore your needs, then you can say that the relationship is heading to doom. Be rest assured that a relationship that is hardly talked about by both partners are quite difficult to last.

Each individual refuses to make up the generality of the society and then stores up a lot of things. Never Never expect your partner to be psychic, as they will only resent you when inevitably they fail to meet your needs and you become irritated as a result.

3. Failure to plan
When you fail to plan, then you plan to fail. When that is archived, you will realize that there are a lot of sensitive topics that merits our attention. Just make sure that you get to get to write down your thoughts before hand so that you will gather your points and settle serious matters quickly. Write down a list of important matters in a journal and look for ways it can be discussed or handled.

Anger, sadness and jealousy are not tools for a settling differences.

4. Settle differences before you sleep
When you have a prolonged argument, and it does not become settled, then it is possible for you to take the relationship to it’s end. When you have misunderstandings, make sure that they are settled well enough, and then say a good night before sleeping.

When you find yourself snapping at your partner after a long day’s work or fighting over a relatively trivial issue in the evening, suggest that you both go to bed and resolve the matter in the morning. When you settle the matter that night, then it may lead to more anger.

5. Speaking ill of your partner
When your partner is away from eye shot, then it is possible for you to talk about the ills and short comings. Will it be good?

According to research, it has been gathered that when that is done, then it reduces the level of trust and confidence. When those two important qualities are missing, then the relationship is really going to crumble.

It is possible that you may had done one or more of the above mentioned things. Be sure to correct them or you may be taking the relationship to an end.
https://dailyfamily.ng/5-ways-you-did-to-ruin-your-relationship/

Pastor Bisi Adewale spoke at the Lagos Singles and Married Conference 2017 which held at the National stadium Surulere, Lagos on the 29th of October 2017 about the things couples need to build a Great marriage.

The Pastor who is the founder of Family Booster Ministry who organized the Conference addressed the Singles and Married in attendance at the program about the importance of building a Great marriage.

He said: “Evil marriage is not genetic; that your parent had a bad marriage does not mean you should have a bad marriage.”

Pastor Bisi Adewale mentioned that Great marriage can be built by connecting with one’s manufacturer, which is God, he said: “When you connect with the Holy Spirit, your marriage will be transformed. If you live a righteous life, God will settle all your troubles.”

He mentioned that great marriage can also be built by having a good beginning. He said: “If you start your marriage in a hurry, it will end in horror.”

While ministering the Pastor also mentioned that proper readiness will help a couple to build great marriage, he added that another major key to building a great marriage is building bridges and not walls.

He encouraged the husbands to take care of their wives as he explained that when a woman is young she is her husband’s mistress, when she is middle-aged, she becomes his mother, when she and her husband become old, then she becomes his nurse.

Pastor Bisi Adewale pointed out that because the devil hates marriages, the couple must declare war, which is ‘Army against Army’.
https://dailyfamily.ng/how-to-build-great-marriage-pastor-bisi-adewale/

Honey, also called Oyin in Yoruba language has been part of humanity for so many years. But it is amazing to know that a lot of people are not informed about the benefits of honey.


Here are 11 major health benefits of honey:

1. Honey is a healthy alternative to sugar
Original honey is very healthy and can be used as a sweetener instead of sugar. Honey contains fewer calories than sugar.

2. Honey can be used to treat wounds and burns
Honey contains anti-bacterial and anti-inflammatory elements that are effective in the treatment of wounds, burns and other skin conditions. It is also very useful in the treatment of foot ulcer suffered by diabetic patients.

3. Honey helps in relieving cough
Research has shown that honey acts as better suppressants for coughs than cough syrups. When a cough has denied your child some sleep, giving that child honey will help him or her fall asleep easily.
However, it is important to note that honey should not be given to children under the age of one (1) year.

4. Honey can help prevent heart-related diseases
Some certain types of cancers and heart disease can be prevented with the consumption of healthy honey.

5. Honey helps the body to regulate blood sugar
Honey does not increase the sugar level in the blood, unlike white sugar. Honey contains fructose and glucose that regulates the sugar level effectively and efficiently.

6. Honey beautifies the skin
Honey is also helpful in giving adequate nourishment to the skin. Honey, when added to other ingredients to make a homemade treatment for your skin, helps to moisturize and nourish the skin and give it a glow.

7. Honey acts as Anti-fungal and Anti-bacterial
According to Peter Molan, Director of the Honey Research Unit at the University of Waikato in New Zealand, he says: “All honey is antibacterial because the bees add an enzyme that makes hydrogen peroxide.” Honey also has a long shelf life.

8. Honey helps to reduce ulcers and gastrointestinal disorders
According to recent research, Honey helps in the treatment of disorders like ulcer and gastroenteritis.

9. Honey enhances athletic performance
Unlike other sweeteners, Honey improves the recovery time of an athlete and also maintains the body’s glycogen levels.

10. Honey aids weight maintenance
Honey according to research helps to suppress excessive appetite and is also good as a replacement for sugar because it does not gather extra pounds in the body. Honey can help protect a person with a tendency to be obese from obesity.

11. Honey helps to prevent diabetes
Consumption of healthy honey can help prevent a person from being diabetic and it can also aid the treatment of diabetes. Diabetic patients can add honey and cinnamon to their diabetic diet plan. Honey increases insulin in the body and reduces hyperglycemia.
https://dailyfamily.ng/11-health-benefits-of-health-benefits-of-honey-oyin/

3 key steps to overcome a betrayal
Each person who has had to face a loving disappointment due to betrayal knows how hard it is to overcome and move on. After all, many thoughts arise and various feelings that cause low self-esteem are immense. But, life still has many good things to offer and moving forward is the best step.

In this walk some attitudes are primordial for the success and overcoming and they can include:

1. Eliminate guilt
Every person who is betrayed seeks the reason for this event. She conducts an internal research into her attitudes, visions, and relationships, trying to find what might have caused the spouse’s slip. It is very important to understand that people are free and their choices belong to them. When a betrayal occurs, it is because the spouse chose this and not for any other reason.

And if he accuses the person betrayed by his mistakes, probably in addition to being a traitor, he is abusive. It is very important for overcoming that the betrayed person understands this and stops feeling guilty, regain their self-esteem and move on, with the spouse or not, aware that if the other betrayed was because they have some problem with himself.

2. Change focus
The tendency is to think about the event and the misery itself all the time. This should be avoided so that the overcoming is total. Negative thoughts will only harm and curb personal progress and can bring diseases like depression. Finding a way to occupy the mind, beyond work and family responsibilities, will be effective for rapid improvement. Something as a volunteer service, a pleasant hobby involved with arts, sports or the study of something new.

Social networks do not enter into this listing since intense involvement with them in such a delicate situation can destroy self-esteem even more. The future possibilities are immense and life does not have to be sad for the happened. Mourning will surely come and it will have to be past, the better it will be when there is interest in living happily despite problems.

3. Friendships
It is very important that they be preserved, retaken and initiated. We are human beings and all need each other for survival and happiness. Staying closer to parents, siblings and other loved ones will do very well. Going out, going out, meeting new people, going to new places and going back to the old ones that always pleased, smiling and having fun with friends, this step is very important for the overcoming to be effective.

If the couple opts for separation or for continuing together, these 3 steps will be critical to overcoming. When directed to the chosen goal they will become a mainstay for the continuation of life and rebuilding of the injured spouse.

It will be up to both to define what is best and once decided they should keep the votes so that trust is restored and the relationship of the two does not make their lives unpleasant. Together or apart, especially when there are more people involved as children, they should do their utmost to forgive and move forward with a light and resolved heart.
https://dailyfamily.ng/3-key-steps-to-overcome-a-betrayal-2/

4 Important Considerations Before You Ask for a Marriage

Most people dream about the perfect marriage. This dream comes to life in the courtship and extends until the day of marriage, the search for everything perfect. Then life sends the signals, the party does not go as planned and the partner did not live up to the expectations of the spouse. Thus arise the frustrations, the discouragement, many cases arise of dissatisfaction that generates until the divorce.

Sadly, situations like these occur because people do not question their relationships and end up making hasty decisions, acting on the momentum.

Note the four considerations made in matters that are important before you ask for it in marriage:

1. Am I pursuing perfection or potential?
A marriage can not be achieved by perfection, but by potential, for many aims for marriage, yet few couples are not only willing but also prepared to make the righteous sacrifices that are fundamental to the relationship to work out.

2. Are we mature enough to deal with our differences?
Marriage requires adaptations, such as choosing not to be offended when harsh words are spoken, without divorce being the first and last choice. For this to be possible, it takes a lot of maturity to deal with such a situation.

Understand that both have become one and that selfish appetites and desires can not control their lives so as not to harm the spouse and the relationship is one of the important points that mature couples understand and live.

3. Are we true in our relationship?
A relationship can not last if it is based on lies. Marriages can not last, when they have no foundation other than falsehood and have no secure and true foundations, such as love and loyalty.

Sincerity is essential to achieving a successful relationship, as it is the foundation that will allow love to grow and flourish over the years. However, if there is no sincerity between the couple, it will be the end of everything, since the lack of it tends to be the crucial point for the end of the relationship.

4. What are our priorities?
Knowing each other’s priorities is valuable before accepting a request for marriage or doing so because priorities define our values and values tends to define who we are and what we are seeking. So, think well, love to be true needs to have basis and direction.

Marriage is sacred and should last, but for this to be possible, it is necessary to question the chosen person and weigh some things like:

You should not ask for someone in marriage who does not have goals of having children if that is your plan for the future. Perhaps, it is difficult to give up who you love so much, but to act for a reason and not for emotion at this moment can free you from great disappointments in the future.

And all this is because both are seeking different paths, this tends to go against the ideals of one’s own marriage, since in him the husband and the wife walk side by side along the same road, without ever choosing different paths.
https://dailyfamily.ng/4-important-considerations-before-you-ask-for-a-marriage/

10 Ways to Make Your Wife Happy
Every woman dreams of being happy. Many of them spend their lives thinking that when they marry they will be able to find true happiness, they dream of that enchanted prince who will one day take her home and make her the happiest woman in the world.

In the dating phase, especially at the beginning when the conquest begins, she even believes that it can be real. Your suitor seems to do everything to make you happy. He is engaged, courted, arrives before she leaves work or college, is always tidy, perfumed, available, he is a delicate, considerate guy and wants to please her in the smallest details.

After marriage, things usually change, unfortunately, and many men have missed the opportunity to make their wife dream again, or rather, to live a princes’s life, as she has always dreamed.

Here we are going to bring in simple 10 ways where you, man, can change this scenario and make, every day, your woman happy.



We are sure that all men want to learn this, after all, to have a woman, even happier, makes any man a man accomplished.

Of course also that every woman wants her man, whether husband, boyfriend or boyfriend, to watch, understand and practice what we will expose here.

Comment below all the points that you agree with us.

Get ready and write down there, men, this is your chance to have the happiest woman in the world by your side:

1. Declare
If you have something that a woman loves, it is to receive a declaration of love. If it’s in public, better yet. So, gentleman, make it a habit. Tell her she’s beautiful, intelligent, attractive, that she’s getting better every day. If possible declare in front of your children extolling how much she has been a dedicated mother.

2. value
The second way has much to do with the first. If you praise, you must also value it. There are many men who only look at the faults of women and forget all the effort and dedication they have day by day, with children, home, and work. Cherish with deeds and words.

3. Listen to your beloved
If there is one thing that woman likes, is to talk. And you need to take the time to listen to it. Make it a habit.

4. Help at home
That’s one thing that’s hard on most men. There’s a lot of man who thinks he’s just coming in, lying down on the couch and starting to ask. She lies and stays there just changing the control of the TV and thinks that the wife is his employee.

This is not the right stance of whoever wants to make a woman happy. You need to wash some dishes, help with the tidying up, and preferably do not leave everything messy and scattered.

Have you thought about asking her what you could share with her that would make her happier?

5. Be less selfish
The Bible says that it is better to give than to receive, but in many marriages some men only want to demand, they demand a brilliant housewife, a good cook, an enthusiastic lover, a good professional, and give very little. They are selfish and demanding. Think about what you are offering and what you are charging.

6. Retake Romanticism
You know something that leaves the woman in the clouds? A romantic man. Many cases of betrayal occur because in the house she has a brutal, intransigent, arrogant and selfish husband and the street appears that romantic, conquering face, full of good offers and she falls. Pay attention and resume the romanticism of dating time with your wife.


6. Be a man.
Want to make your wife happy? Get ready. Do not think it’s cool to be shaved, forget about taking a shower and get all sweaty in bed. No, no, this is definitely not alluring. If you want your woman happy, start to get ready to conquer her, and if you dress yourself, you’ll make her feel more excited.

8. Embrace it
You know something men do very little? Embrace your women. And know: this does very well for them. Ask your beloved there.

Know loved ones, they want to feel welcomed, protected, and a hug from your man represents it well.

9. Make Surprises
Another thing that makes any woman happy are surprises. It could be a coffee in bed, a little note you left in her bag talking about how important it is to you, or the flowers you sent to her work. There are several ways, invent your own, and surprise your loved one every day.

10. Love, love and in doubt love
Every woman expects to be loved. This is her greatest wish. Nothing is more important to your spouse than to know that you are loved by your man. Demonstrating love for her will make her more secure, she will get less on her foot, she will feel more fulfilled and happy.

Simple to do the 10 ways? Of course not, but it is super necessary. God gave you this gift that was this woman, you need to take good care of him, and following the ways proposed everything will be easier.

Does that make sense? How about you mark the man of your life or the woman of your life in this article and propose a happier life among you following these steps?

We want to share something for men: a happy woman changes her life. The result is a blessing to your family. Take time, invest time in it, your relationship will improve and your children will thank you. Let us together build a better life, so that in the end you two can be happy forever.
https://dailyfamily.ng/10-ways-to-make-your-wife-happy/

3 Ways To Kiss Him So That He Will Never Forget You
Kissing is a demonstration of love, attraction and surrender to a person, it is an intimate action that unites the couple, where they experience magical moments that strengthen the relationship. It is the ideal way to convey emotions and feelings. Sometimes kisses even alienate a person or make them mad with love.

In many cultures kisses are demonstrations of love, friendship, trust, peace, respect or a simple greeting, just rub the nose of the couple to kiss in the form of an Eskimo. Did you know that the meaning of kissing is different in different parts of the world?

There are many ways to kiss and each transmits different messages. So be aware that when kissing your partner, you have the assurance that he will not be able to forget you.

1. Kiss on the cheek
Remember that the correct way to convey a real sense of complicity, support, friendship, attraction is when you place your lips perfectly on the cheek of your partner. Do not make the mistake of kissing the air, because then you will not be transmitting affection.

Normally, they are the most affectionate kisses that are expressed in public, to demonstrate a bond of companionship, closeness, affection and respect.

2. Selinho
It is the most practical way to demonstrate to your partner that he is special, without provoking passionate feelings, usually lasts a few seconds, however, they are extremely important in keeping the relationship strengthened.

Sometimes it may seem that this kiss is a routine in marriage, however, it conveys feelings of unity, sweetness and security. Get into the habit of kissing him intensely, that your lips really enjoy the contact with your partner’s. This is a way of telling him that you love him, without words.

3. The kiss with a hug
It may be a kiss on the cheek, forehead, seals or passionate, no matter what kind of kiss, but remember to hug your partner strongly and intensely. This way you can convey your feelings and emotions. Any occasion is perfect, do it morning, afternoon, evening or anytime.

If you do, surely your partner will remember not only your kisses but also your aroma and essence.

All kisses leave pleasant experiences in the mind of any person, remember to take the time that is necessary, to kiss with intensity and, above all, with love. This way you will be able to demonstrate to your partner your feelings, strengthening your relationship.
https://dailyfamily.ng/3-ways-to-kiss-him-so-that-he-will-never-forget-you/

A marriage is said to be healthy when there is room for growth. On the other hand, when a marriage is not growing, it becomes boring. In other words, it dies gradually unless immediate actions are taken for its revival and restoration. This situation is inevitable where married couples are not making deliberate efforts to spice up and work on their relationships so as to bring the very best out of it.

The fact remains that marriage involves a lot of activities. For some couples, such activities may be narrowed to a few areas of their relationship like talking about children, work, kitchen, but to mention a few. Also, some actually relate to matters that touch their hearts and emotions deeply.


Severally, I have been confronted with this question: What should I do when marriage becomes boring? If you are in this situation, here are things married couples can do either together or individually to bring their relationship back to life:


1. Take stock of the present state
You need to know areas in your relationship that are unhealthy and gone down. There should be a critical review of things and situations in your marriage. This should be done with all sincerity without blaming each other for the present state of things.

2. Take responsibility
Playing the blame game will not resolve issues. You should be ready to take responsibility for what has gone wrong and be ready to take positive actions in the right direction for the betterment of your relationship.

3. Take positive steps
Having critically reviewed the state of your relationship and making yourself ready to re-ignite the spark, you need to take positive actions in the right direction. Such actions and steps involve the following:

(a) Identify the monotonous routine: Your daily routine such as meals and mealtime might have become monotonous. There is a need to pay special attention to what has impaired your excitement and boxed you to a situation of no creativity

(b) Discuss observations with your spouse: Call the attention of your spouse to your observations. Please do not argue or defend yourself. Have a possible and open mind towards the discussions. Do not get angry if your spouse does not align with you, be patient.

(c) Be ready to spice up things: Marriage needs to be spiced up with many activities beyond the daily routine. Introduce special delicacies and strategic outings to celebrate special dates like birthdays, wedding anniversary, etc.

(d) Embrace new activities: Lookout for special places and activities that will improve bonding between you and your spouse. It may be old activities you have abandoned such as those you enjoyed while courting your spouse before getting married, etc. Learn new things of great value for the good of your relationship.

(e) Work on your friendship: Revive the friendship between you and your spouse. Bring back your ‘gisting’ skills; Bring up good points of discussion; Enjoy being together; Enjoy your bedroom activities; Become a pleasant person; Forgive generously and erase hurtful memories; Be happy with your spouse and marriage.


(f) Acquire new skills: Lack of relationship skills is harmful and can ruin such relationship. Every couple must develop certain skill like communication skill, relational skill, financial management skill, parenting skill, conflict management, romance skill etc, these skills will boost the relationship and help build a robust marriage and family life

(g) Go for counsel: There are instances, where couples need a counsellor, who is ordained by God, who is grounded in the knowledge of marriage and who will not be biased. He or she will be able to encourage you and help put things straight in making your family beautiful, colourful, joyful and fruitful

(h) Commit everything into God’s hand: God is the author of marriage. To get the best out of your relationship, He must be informed and involved. You need Him at every junction of your marriage because without Him, you can’t go far. In fact, you need God to complement your individual or joint effort.
https://dailyfamily.ng/what-to-do-when-marriage-becomes-boring/

here are things that faithful men have in common. These 15 things these men who know how to love and respect a woman have in common will make it clear that you are with someone who knows how to keep your promise to always be faithful.

But if you are with a man who has these characteristics, the more likely you are with someone who will always be faithful to you:

1. Fulfill Your Promises
Your man keeps his word in all areas of his life. You know that when he promises to do something with you or with your family, friends or work, he will do everything he can to keep up with what he has promised.

2. He is kind to his friends, but keeps a distance and treats them with respect
Statistics show that at least half of the infidelities occur between the partner and one of our friends.

3. Do not hide things from you
There are no secrets between you, he knows he can tell you everything.

4. Know that there are things that are dangerous for the couple and DO NOT do them
He is the kind of man who can tell when a situation can be dangerous (like a business trip with a woman or a trip without you being together), tries to avoid them and does not act like it’s nothing.

5. Do not have contact with your ex-girlfriends
He is not one who justifies keeping in touch with his ex-girlfriend, on the contrary, he is the one who decided to cut off all this kind of communication.

6. Being the love of your life is as important as being your best friend.
Understand the difference between the two relationships and know that being friends is one of the best bases in a love relationship.

7. He imposes limits on his co-workers
That you are in his life is not a secret to anyone. It makes them respect and imposes limits to make sure there will be no misunderstandings (statistics say that 60% of extramarital affairs begin with co-workers).

8. He feels that you are grateful for what he does for you.
90% of infidels say they have begun to feel more disconnected from their partners because of their lack of gratitude for what they did. So one of the most important things you can do for your man is to show him gratitude and value what he does for you.

9. Is not a narcissist
Men who love themselves more than anyone or anything in the world are more likely to fall into infidelity and do so by their own ego and need to conquer more than anything else.

10. Have intimacy with you in a healthy way for both of you and the relationship
He does not use pornography, he knows the importance of both feeling connected both physically and emotionally. According to statistics, 52% of couples experiencing infidelity did not feel sexually satisfied.

11. Do not depend on compliments to be happy
He’s not the kind of man who needs to be constantly listening to how good, beautiful and loved he is.
https://dailyfamily.ng/15-things-men-one-hundred-percent-faithful/

Many people are wrong to choose their spouses because they do not pay attention to some of the signs that may appear during dating.

People usually make two big mistakes in dating. The first is not asking about past partner relationships. Many avoid talking about the past for fear of knowing what they do not want or for fear of creating a bad climate in the current relationship.

And the second mistake is to ignore the pattern of partner behaviour. Others refuse to recognize behaviors that in the future will cause discord in the relationship. They believe things will change as soon as they get married.

There is no way to predict if a relationship will last, but if both are willing to make the relationship work, the odds of a divorce are much lower. We would give you 5 signs of someone who will possibly never leave your spouse:

1. He can deal with stress
The person who knows how to deal with stress in the right way will know how to unite with the spouse to resolve the situation. They understand the meaning of commitment, loyalty, and teamwork. People who do not know how to deal with stress and complicated situations can blame each other and or move away.

2. He has the same interests and values
It’s much easier to get along with someone who cares about the same things. Couples who have little in common get bored and are more likely to fight. The couple should also have common life goals. There are cases where the couple will rarely reach an agreement, such as a spouse who does not want children and the other who wants.

3. He has empathy
The spouse who has empathy cares about the other’s feelings and would not want to see her partner sad.

4. He knows how to communicate
It sounds like something simple, but lack of communication in marriage can cause great fights and even divorce. The spouse who knows how to express himself will know how to communicate his feelings in a healthy way, instead of avoiding talking and keeping hurts.
It’s hard to know what’s going on in the other’s head. Many people choose to hide their feelings to avoid fights or for some other reason, but this is very harmful to the relationship.

5. He wants to be close to the spouse, physically and emotionally
He likes physical contact and enjoys spending time with his wife. Physical contact is very important for the couple’s connection. Couples cannot feel alone.
https://dailyfamily.ng/5-signs-your-spouse-will-never-abandon-you/

5 Approaches Some Men Take That Are Annoying
Love is the most powerful feeling, it is related to friendship, respect and fellowship. Love has the ability to connect two people of different characteristics to all eternity, but this will only happen if both accept the differences and respect the imperfections of the other.

Love is true and noble, which is why it should not be begged or forced, for love unites the spouses even in days of tribulations and hassles. Love is powerful to heal, improve, and raise a family.

These are 5 approaches that some men use and that real women hate.

1. Gagging all the time
Most women are mysterious and adore this, so men, do not keep bragging, it’s best to let it happen. Let women discover for themselves what is best in you. If it’s worth it, they will not let you escape.

2. Weak sings
Men who use weak and outdated songs make women want to distance themselves from them. It takes wisdom when it comes to approaching a woman, sometimes the man will have more chance to praise her beauty, because woman likes to be praised, and not approached with sings like, “Cat, you are the lid of my kettle” Or “If green is like this, imagine mature.”

3. Forcing a woman to like him
True women can not be forced to like a man, they have to be attracted, and only then can they be conquered. When they have no attraction, no use, they will not.

Be a smart and patient man, strive to respect the woman you both crave. At first, you may not even get her love, but you can win something of great value, her friendship. It is known by many that friendships over the years can turn into great love stories.

4. Try to win over money
A man who usually conquers women for money tends to pay more for what he has bought. “If a woman sells, she is probably worth less than what she paid for it.” And the same is true of man, both for what he pays and for what he sells.

5. Machismo
A real woman hates being approached by macho men who do not respect them and who tries in the first encounter to impose their machismo and the fear in her.

Women like to be respected, they also like to be listened to and cared for. These women do not expect a perfect man, but a true man with potential.

In recent times, some ladies have found it hard to keep a man and thus, resigned to the fate that relationships can never work out for them especially after trying severally and failing.

What might be the reason for this problem? The very first step in resolving this is to look inwards; looking into a few details of your past failed relationships and finding what exactly went wrong must be done. You may be surprised that you may have a part in the relationship problems.

For you to move ahead into a lasting relationship that may lead to marriage; here are some questions you need to ask yourself and practical steps to take:

1. What type of man are you attracted to?
Before you agree to embark on a relationship, you need to ask yourself this question: what did you see in him that made you interested? If you are attracted to a man because he is tall, handsome, eloquent, intelligent, spiritual, generous but to mention a few, it may go a long way in determining how long you will stay with him.

However, my advice is that you should look beyond the physical qualities the man possesses. you want a lasting relationship that may lead to marriage, try not to get attracted to a man because of what you can see alone. Take a close look for a while and note the inward traits that will be revealed with time.

2. What are your limits?
Before you go into a relationship with a man, have you noticed anything about him that annoys you easily? Can you condone such things? Give time for friendship to develop. In the course of the friendship, you will find out some traits about him such as his temperament, the way he eats, how he relates to others but to mention a few. Time will tell definitely and would aid you in deciding whether to start a relationship with him or not.

3. How long can you wait to see changes in a man?
Relationships involve two imperfect people, and this is why you also need to look inwards at yourself. Are you a dreamland lady who wants everything to be a fairytale or that type that wishes to grow in a man with potentials?. The truth is you can never find any perfect man anywhere in the world. Wake up! Men are not angels, they are humans too. So, if you want to stay in a relationship, allow your man to grow and also assist him to be the best.

4. What are those traits you see in a man that you will never let go?
Every woman has something she sees in her man which she will never let go. Find that thing out first before you agree to go into a relationship. When you know these things, you will be in the best position to confidently decide on whether to proceed or not.
https://dailyfamily.ng/4-ways-ladies-can-keep-their-men/

There are always small details in a relationship that can put everything down. Just as women do not support some male attitudes, there are also things men hate about women that can ruin a relationship . We did a survey and today we brought a list of 8 things men hate about women.

Before we start, we find it interesting to note that this does not work for 100% of men. They may be alike, but of course they are not identical, so keep in mind that these can not be taken as absolute truths.

1. When they like to discuss the relationship all the time
Most men do not like to expose or talk about their feelings. Thus, they tend to shy away from women who like to discuss the relationship all the time.

If you are looking for a long- lasting relationship,then work on it for it.

2. When they like to play “second mother”
Mother is a mother and no one will ever occupy the same position as them. Do not want to play the second mother of your boyfriend or husband.

3. When they pursue you all the time
Calling to see if everything is okay is an acceptable attitude. Calling every 10 minutes just to say a simple hello can go beyond the limits that men see as “acceptable.”

4. When they ban the spies
If you have an attitude that practically all men hate in women, it is when they ban the spies and start flipping drawers, cabinets, backpacks and purses for secrets or even things that only exist in their heads.

A healthy relationship needs to have confidence as a basis. If you demonstrate that you do not trust him, you will open up for him to feel the same.

5. When they do not put their hand in their pocket
It seems unbelievable, but in the middle of the 21st century, there are still women looking for men who pay all their bills and bank all their luxuries.

Modern men do not like that kind of attitude – and if it were otherwise, I guarantee you would not either. Splitting the bills is a way of showing your independence and letting any relationship lighter.

6. When they take advantage and treat men as slaves
Fortunately, the society has been evolving – albeit in the footsteps of an ant. Just as you do not want to be the housewife, wash and iron all your clothes, cook every day, look after your children and clean the house, it’s not fair to insist that your boyfriend or husband perform all the task at home. Agree for someone to come and fix up the broken or damaged pipes in the home, or fix the shower, change the fuse, fix the bed or even change the vehicle tires.

Be independent and know if you if it’s your turn to do something. Do not require him to know how to fry an egg if you do not even know how to change a light bulb.

7. When they complain about everything
A person who complains about everything is boring – be it woman or man.

Males tend to be less patient than females. If there is something that men hate about women, it is when they complain about everything.

8. When they compare to ex-boyfriends
In the first place, if you live by bringing to the present who was part of your past, you may not be so well resolved.

Secondly, if you keep saying “my ex did that,” “I always came in this restaurant with my ex” or “my ex never yelled at me like that,” then my dear you are practically asking for your relationship to end.

To understand why this is an attitude that men hate in women, it is only a question of reversing roles. If he kept talking about his ex-girlfriends all the time, you would have a fit of nerves and have him “pick up a little coke on his way out.” Do not do that.
https://dailyfamily.ng/8-things-men-hate-women/

The majority of us have experienced the moment when we realize a relationship is in rapid decline.

Although such a slide often ends in a breakup, it doesn’t have to. In all likelihood, there’s some behavior undermining the relationship’s foundation of love and friendship—and if you can identify it, you can save the relationship.

Here are 5 of the most common relationship killers, as well as quick remedies to heal the hurt:

1. Blame and shame.

Aside from all-out abusive behavior, blaming and shaming may be the fastest way to kill your connection. Both behaviors communicate contempt for your partner, displaying that you view him or her as beneath you or deserving of scorn. 5 Quickest Ways to Kill Your Relationship

This point of view has toxic effects not only on the person receiving blame but on the person doing the blaming as well. Quick Remedy: Start every disagreement or conflict with the presumption that the problem is not caused by a character flaw in your partner. This will help both of you deal with the problem at hand without hurling personal insults at each other. 5 Quickest Ways to Kill Your Relationship

2. Kill the fun.

This behavior, while damaging to a relationship, often sneaks up on couples unawares. A husband will wake up one day, look at his wife and think, “When was the last time we just had fun together?”

Deep in the trenches of an ongoing fight, a wife will turn to her husband and say, “Can’t we ever just have fun?” Once all the joy and lightheartedness is gone from the relationship, it becomes a struggle just to stay together.

Quick Remedy: Identify one thing the two of you used to enjoy doing together. You don’t necessarily have to resurrect that exact activity today (or you may not be able to), but the memory of that joy can inject hope for future fun into the relationship. 5 Quickest Ways to Kill Your Relationship

3. Use breaking up as a bargaining chip.

When you threaten to break up with someone (or divorce them) during everyday conflicts, your partner will develop the impression that the relationship doesn’t matter very much to you.

These threats don’t work very well for getting what you want; worse, they imply that you don’t value the relationship—an implication often far more damaging than the source of the current conflict itself.

Quick Remedy: Simply put, use something other than the relationship as your leverage. Instead of threatening, “If you go to Vegas with your friends, I’ll break up with you,” try, “If you go to Vegas with your friends, I’ll be worried the whole time.”

Not only is the second statement probably more honest, it opens the door for you both to addressing the deeper issue at hand.

4. Conjure the ghosts of exes.

Everyone knows that talking about exes is a minefield. If you remember them with too much fondness, your current partner may become jealous or insecure. If you speak of them with too much disdain, your partner may wonder if you have anger issues. Past relationships are an intractable part of your life story, but if you constantly conjure the ghost of an ex, your current relationship will start to feel haunted.

Quick Remedy: Communicate what you liked (or disliked) about an ex-behavior without mentioning the ex himself (or herself). For example, instead of saying, “My ex always cleaned up after himself,” try, “It would mean a lot to me if you cleaned up after yourself.”

5. Keep one foot out the door.

This is the stealthiest relationship killer on this list. A relationship could be going well, by all accounts, but it somehow feels…off. It feels shaky.

You wouldn’t be totally surprised if your partner broke up with you tomorrow; alternately, the idea of ending the relationship yourself sounds plausible.

These are the symptoms of keeping one foot out the door. This relationship killer is not a bullet, like blame and shame; it’s a poison. 5 Quickest Ways to Kill Your Relationship

Quick Remedy: Be more transparent in your thoughts and actions. There’s no need to commit yourself body and soul to every relationship you enter into, but relationships become painful when you never know what’s going on. Ask questions—and reveal your own honest answers.

If you feel your relationship is suffering from one of these killers, give it a healthy dose of behavior change. It may recover quite nicely.
https://dailyfamily.ng/5-quickest-ways-kill-relationship/

Fights happen in the best marriages, and they are usually for the same reasons. And as the family grows, so do the motives for discussion!

When the couple have just had children, they are still adapting to the roles of father and mother, and therefore disagreements may arise. As time goes by and children grow older, conflicts tend to decline and couple activities can begin to be resumed.

So, anticipate these problems and see what are the main reasons for fights between couples with children:

1. The distribution of tasks
Many men believe that it is only the woman’s obligation to take care of her children, and this creates many conflicts.

Even before the baby is born, it is important for the two to talk about it and make it clear that the division of tasks is important not only for the organization of the home, but also a demonstration of love and dedication for the family.

2. Lack of sex
After children are born, there is not much time left and no provision when parents are alone. Even so, it is necessary to make that extra effort so that the couple is not distant, and to understand that before being fathers and mothers the two are still a couple of boyfriends.

3. Personal life in imbalance
If only one partner can go to the movies, football or have time for their personal care the other may feel at a disadvantage. It is important that the two of you have at least one hour of the week to do something you like, like a sport, go to the beauty salon etc.

4. Financial Planning
The lack of financial organization undermines even any relationship. Hiding partner spending is even considered a kind of betrayal. To avoid this kind of problem, communicate and always plan expenses. There is a simple rule that a couple I know uses very effectively: Purchases over $ 20 advise the partner about the expense, whatever it is. So you will not have surprises and good spending control.

5. External interference
Often family members do their utmost to help the couple with the arrival of their children. However, this interference can also lead to conflicts in the way of education and parenting. For example, the question of when to start introducing food, giving candy or not etc. A good tip is to have your own well-defined rules at home and at grandparents’ homes, for example, being more flexible.

You may have noticed that the misunderstandings are inevitable. But what will make the difference in the relationship is how the couple can communicate and resolve these discussions, and this will set an example for their children.
https://dailyfamily.ng/top-5-reasons-why-couples-fight-after-having-children-take-care-not-to-happen-to-you/

“All your males are to appear before the Lord.” Exodus 34:23 NAS

GOD SAID, “Three times a year all your males are to appear before the Lord…For I will drive out nations before you…enlarge your borders, and no man shall covet your land” (vv. 23-24 NAS).

Three times a year the men of Israel were to go on a spiritual retreat and seek God’s guidance. And God promised to protect their families and their possessions while they were gone, and even to “enlarge [their] borders.”

So if you’re a husband who wants God to protect your family and bless your endeavours, you must take the time to submit your thoughts, actions, and decisions to His leadership. You’ll never function successfully as the head of your family until you’re under the headship of Christ.

The best thing you can do in leading your home and building a great marriage is to ask the question, “What is the mind of Christ in this matter?” (See 1 Corinthians 2:16). And then follow it. Once you’ve done that, you’ll have your wife’s full attention and cooperation. Why? Because she’s no longer arguing with you and your opinions. Now you’ve brought Christ and His Word into the equation. It may take time for your wife to trust your leadership and respect your thinking, but as she sees you walk with God and practice His principles, she’ll come to trust you and feel secure.

When a woman says to her husband, “I need you to hold me,” she’s not necessarily talking about physical intimacy. She’s talking about her God-given need for security. She needs a husband she can love and trust. And God can make you such a husband.

PRAYER FOCUS:
Father Lord please give all husbands the urgency in their spirit to seek your face on all issues affecting their lives, marriage and endeavours in Jesus name

Soul Food Reading : Luke 17: 20-37, Ps 94-96. Courtesy Grace So Amazing Foundation

https://dailyfamily.ng/one-thing-every-husband-must-do-regularly/