₦airaland Forum

ummsulaym: umm Nusayba, u got me laughing... Ummsulaym is a kuniya taken after a female sahab I never saw though but love so much... Her real name is Ghumaysa, some say Rumaysa... But I don't know if she had a son called sulaym. You & I have sumtin in common*gathering names for the unborn* and we aren't even married yet*LOL*. My dream names for boys are Muhammad and Jibril, for females; Summaya and Rahila... My name is Haritha*just like Adam feminize to Adama, LOL*

@ all, my apologies if we went off topic*derail this thread*... Salam!!!

ummsulaym: sis sissie question-answered your question gbaskilly*pardon my grammar*... Really, that's a straight foward answer she gave even though in a question format...
This is a personal answer, should I say contribution:
1) Though nothing is impossibible with Allah SWT but if a sis couldnt embrace the usage of hijab from primary, secondary and finally pass through higher institution, it just normally becomes 'tougher' to embrace it when a graduate... There are exceptions though but that's how best I can answer that

2) On personal ground, I wouldn't wish or pray to be a second wife not to talk of 3rd or 4th... Other(s)*if my hubby wills to take more* can join me but I love being first... Can't explain it better but I love to be the first if not the 'only'*winks*

3) Allah has made 1-4 permissible and HE is the most wise so I cannot question that rather than pray for the heart to act right if my man ever takes another... But answering why I'll prefer being the only wife is better understood if you put yourself in my shoes which is ''the wife you love so much, the mother of your children, living under the same roof with you but shared with another man or men and you are aware but have to continue living with that''... It's better understood by sisters but All I ask Allah for is to help me bear it with love for my husband and co-wives*if I will ever have any* but bro, the condition that i wount stay under the same roof with the co-wives must be honoured by my husband... It's better when I dont see it happened... I wont and will never prevent my man from taking another wife*if he wills* reason being that he musn't have any reason whatsoever to 'near zina'... I want to make JANNAH with him*winks*

wa Allahu a'alam

harmeenart: Dyeing gray hair and shaving the beards are two different issues with different judgements and cant be compared.check www.muttaqun.com for evidences on beards,cant type much.I hope it helps a little.

tbaba1234: ^Has to do more with ' arrogance' ?

tbaba1234: I think we have to analyse the evidence for each position to see what is more convincing.

Currently, I believe the position that it is compulsory is strongest but makrooh is bad enough.

I have also seen the papers that permit not keeping beards but they are not convincing at all for me.

You can get fatwas for everything now.

Esji80: Assalamu alaikum w.w

****HIJAB

busar: brothers still doing what they know how to do best. Shaving of beards makru? Do you havae any evidence for that? The Prophet is the best example for the believers. And i don't think there's any companion that don't keep the beards.

Sissie: Salam, I will answer your questions with questions

1. Why do many graduate men don't keep the beards, or wear trouser that longer than the ankle?

wsalam.9ja 4mula of answering questions b d@.

Does keeping beards/wearing trouser longer than the ankle fall in the same category with 'hijab'?

2.most men don't want to marry divorces or widows that have been married previously for like 2, 3 times as a first wife?

For me,I can marry any women(previously married or not) so far she has the qualities I need and she's not prohibited for me to marry Islamically.


3.you prefer women that haven't been previously married. And why do most do men in polygamy do injustice,and how many men can comfortable take care of more than one?

ummsulaym: hehehehe, ya akhee, I think say u don forget the questions ooo.... I wan commot, when i reuturn In Shaa Allah, I will modify this to the reply...

Esji80: 1.Why is that MANY Sisters that have gone to School e.g graduates do not like to be wearing 'Hijab'?

2.Most of you don't want a husband that is married i.e the one that'll take you as second,third or fourth wife,y?

3.U prefer a husband d@ won't re-marry another wife.y?

tbaba1234: I apologise if I said anything wrong or inappropriate.

I love you for the sake of Allah.

babylolaroy: you both are muslims so just stop this argurment...it is not okay to do so. agree to disagree nd lets move to something else
thanx

babylolaroy: you both are muslims so just stop this argurment...it is not okay to do so. agree to disagree nd lets move to something else
thanx

Sissie: I don't understand the argument.

One translation is

Desiring chastity not lust.

Another one is

Desiring chastity not unlawful sexual intercourse

So what's the argument?

Sissie: I don't understand the argument.

One translation is

Desiring chastity not lust.

Another one is

Desiring chastity not unlawful sexual intercourse

So what's the argument?

Qhan: Sallam Alykum Bro n Sis.

Am a regular user of NL, and also a regular guest of the Islam for Muslims forum. I have only summoned courage to post this, the reason for a New User Account.

I need opinions on How Best to approach a Muslimah for a serious relationship (With the intention of Marriage in the Next few months, say 12mnths on the high side ) under the following circumstances:

1. Not familiar with any Muslimah or have any in mind
2. A very shy and Timid person when it comes to female matters
3. Just one history of friendship with a Muslimah with hope of marriage, but hope dashed cos of Genotype issue
4. Most Muslimah are always hostile to men they tag as Strangers (and some could even insult or embarrass )


Also is it polite to Post relationship request on Forums or Groups on Facebook?

Sissie: If a man can provide for a woman and decides to marry with the main reason of satisfying his urges legally their is nothing wrong in that as far as he knows and does his duties to her.

However a man can't just decide to get married to satisfy his urge when he can't support a wife, in this situation he should fast to control his urges.

tbaba1234: ^ Wa iyyakum,

Nothing i have said goes against the understanding of the Sahaba. Please provide the evidence that states otherwise. Get married as soon as you can provide support and protection to a home not because of your urges or desires.

A person should get married as soon as he can support a home. If you can't, then fast to help with whatever urges you have. That is the advice from the messenger (peace and blessings be upon him).

0 young men, those among you who can support a wife should marry, for it restrains eyes from casting (evil glances). and preserves one from immorality; but those who cannot should devote themselves to fasting for it is a means of controlling intimate desire. Muslim :: Book 8 : Hadith 3231

Help yourself to any classical arabic dictionary. Remember that is the language of the Quran. Lane's lexicon is available online.

I have a video reference that i can't upload here (too big).

tbaba1234: What is there to interpret? It is clear.

A person can have the means to support a woman but refuse to get married. Living a chaste life is certainly one of the purposes of marriage but you can not separate the hadiths. They have to be understood together.

Besides Allah makes it clear in the Quran:

....muhsineena ghayra musafiheena ...

Muhsineena-

Root: To be guarded, be inaccessible, be strongly fortified, be preserved, be protected--

This is how Allah describes a man getting married.

ghayra- not

root - except, without, etc....

Musafiheena-

Musafi is a player... One who just wants to get his lust out.

Allah says be the one who brings women into security and protection not the one who just wants to get his lust out.

babylolaroy: jazak Allah khair. Thanx broda. so i can pick it from dia and contribute mashaAllah

babylolaroy: salam alaykum warahmatullah. i see all of una. this's got to be a very interesting thread. the topic is catchy buh as you see, i just started following so i dont know wats on ground. please dont ask me to go way up to read, let a good brother or sister fisabilillah just tell me wats for discussion and i'll pik it from dia.

eshe

Sissie: Theirs no right and wrong, you don't go saying someone father is wrong, because you share a different perspective. it's not like he's delaying for no reason, a man who don't have means to get married also delays gettings married. There's a reason.

I don't know what your going on about with the 3rd party thing. I said in my own house, my own dad no 3rd party that will change his mind, so if professors like let them suggest more than 3 methods.

Besides what is with the hmmmm graduate? I said I am not in her shoes, am not an undergraduate trying to convince my dad, when you suggested I involve a third party, was just telling umm sulaym what my sis went through.

maclatunji: To be honest, I think he makes sense. Sex is important but it is not food or water, you won't die if you wait a few years jor.