₦airaland Forum

aisha2:
Disclaimer oh, I didn't advice that you should just jump.in and marry one of your suitors oh just because you want to marry. Take your time know what you want and if any of these suitors have those qualities.
Marriage is not tinini tanana

Ok I hear you. I am not a baby

Chillisauce:
You cant make someone do things until they are ready.
State your concerns to him and move on if you want to.

threatening him with suitors can only back fire.
He is not ready. You can wait for him if you both really want to work things out or jump unto the other suitors.

I hope you court the other ones first before jumping into marriage.
This one you don dey give ultimatum

I no dey give anyone ultimatum, If you have ever experienced this you will understand what I'm saying. What will you do when you want to work things out and your partner doesn't?

Wow! I'm overwhelmed you guys are simply GREAT!
I learnt alot @ aisha2, EfemenaXY, jaybee, lovethlovesmike,cococandy etc..I don't even know who to quote again.

EfemenaXY:
Good girl.

Thanks!

Thanks to everyone that contributed I appreciate.
I will have to use my senses this time, I will choose from one of the suitors.

I no sabi shout!

EfemenaXY:
Now that sounds like an ultimatum and he won't like it.

Why must you get married in a year's time? What's the rush? The more you push, the more he'll dig his heels in, in resistance to you - hence his comment about you trying to pressurise him.

I know it might feel you're spending the best years of your life / youth waiting on someone who may never be ready...but these things can't be forced.

You may have to decide whether or not waiting is worth it for you...or not. If not...well, you know what to do.

I understand perfectly what you are saying, I just gave you one year based on the question you asked me which I know I can never tell him with my mouth.

I am in my late 20's so it's not really that I'm rushing/pushing per say, I'm seeking for advice here to avoid 'had I known'

coogar:
which soap you dey take bath?

Hahahahaha! my dear na idole soap #250. You dey suspect am ni

MzNelly:
Five suitors?!!
When some women out there will DIE for just ONE?

Come, what exactly is the problem again?

Hahahahaha!
Sounds strange, nothing but the truth.

EfemenaXY:
Then he isn't ready.

Question now is: how long are you prepared to wait for him?

He's simply not ready and doesn't want to commit.

if he's willing to commit I don't mind giving him one more year.

Jennimma:
Sweetheart,i understand your plight. I do....my advice is this If there is no commitment,keep dating other guys. You can't continue keeping yourself for a guy who is not ready thereby wasting precious years.

If he is serious about you,no one would tell him to see your parents quickly.

Na that wasting of years be my fears my dear o.

I think I will break up with him before I enter another one because I don't know how to double date.

EfemenaXY:
Then speak to him dear. Make him understand your fears and worries. Be open. Say your piece and let him air his. Men aren't mind readers. Sometimes, what might deem glaringly obvious to us, might completely elude them unless they're very specifically drawn to the issue at hand.

Talk to him and make him understand you need a definite answer.

All the best!

Thanks but I tried making him give me definite answer, he began to talk as if I'm lying and pressurizing him to get married to me.

coogar:
thank you for your honesty, favourgee!

you are not alone in this dilemma. women have had to deal with this scenario. the guy they love isn't ready to marry yet while other favours come knocking on their doors.

the ball is in your court - what makes you happy? can you deal with the fact that you may never love any of your suitors as much as your present boyfriend? does money matter to you more than puppy love?

if you can answer all these questions honestly within yourself then choosing the best suitor shouldn't be a problem. go with your mind & be prepared to cope with whatever consequences that result from your choice.

Thanks for your advice.

Caisenes:
please ma'am,should we start clapping?

Meaning? Please this thread is not for people like you I need matured minds. Thanks!

Hello everyone!

I have been dating this guy for a year now, both of us have jobs so I don't ask him for any financial assistance.
for sometime now I have been getting suitors, they are five in number now asking for my hand in marriage but I keep turning them down because I am hoping on my present relationship though the stuborn ones are still disturbing me with marriage proposals.

I decided to let my boyfriend know about them, the response I got from him wasn't satisfactory. From my own understanding he's not ready to settle down any time soon neither did he tell me to wait for him nor propose to me.

I am confused right now, I don't know if I should wait
for him till when he's ready but my fear is what if he never propose. I really love him and I know he loves me too.

Matured advice please.

"Please don't mind my typing skills I am typing through one kpalasa phone"

Will the girls marry themselves?
And so fucking what if your cousin got married @ 21?

You talk as if a girl can just wake up and pick a husband.

Think before you talk biko!

Yes I can marry because of money.

mine is as follows;
Rukky Sanda
Angela Okorie
Tonto Dike
Anita Joseph
Terry G
Denrele
and many others

Bossman25:
Shortlisted candidates would be called for test..confirm from the perm sec himself!

When?

...