₦airaland Forum

emjoe1:
wow. So na me dey front page so? Abeg. I need a HUG.

dsauce:
Hi pals, I purposely opened a new acct for this cos of d sensitivity. Please i need ur candid advice on this issue.

A cousin of mine got a crate of soft drinks and found out dat one of d 7up has a very big COCKROACH corked inside.

He showed it to a Pepsi distributing van, he was begged to give dem the bottle and give him about four crates in return.

A thought came to my mind and i told him "Man we are educated individuals, we can get a substantial amount of money from dis company if we follow d right procedure.

Maybe by threatening to sue them to court for improper Good house keeping (GHK) during production and total disregard for consumer health safety by getting d services of a lawyer who will first write them of d situation or report to NAFDAC (last option though cos dis means making money for corrupt politicians to steal ,cos we know NAFDAC can't fine them for nothing less than several millions of naira).

As anyone ever done dis n got good money from this companies or gat advices to give.

NOTE:: pls don't castigate us, since d govt cant help us,we av to utilize d slightest opportunity to hit big time.

lalasticlala:
https://mobile.twitter.com/MusadiqZ/media/grid?idx=2

yawahappens:
Guys I feel so bad , cos the temptation was too much, here's how it happened.........

My dad has been ill for over 3 months, he had an accident with fractured wounds but he is recovering, my family had to move to the hospital, so we have bn tending to him on a daily basis....to cut the long Mata short, this hospital has hot and sexy nurses...shuu!

Nna mehnn...everyday I flirt with everyone of them, but there is this particular one that always gave me this "cum and [romance] me" look mehn, the one and only big problem was that she is married (a forbidden fruit), Na she cum fine pass, fresh pass, sexy pass....OMG!, I couldn't resist so I collected her number and we started from decent chats like "how is ur family?, take good care of ur husband" to "I feel like __ hmmmmmm".

It got so intense that we had to choose a date for our Champions league match , so we picked today.

I went to her house and as a sharp guy b4 leaving, I bought a pack of durex condom.
On getting there it was a two-storey building and she was living in one of the flats, I cum dey fear make none of her neighbors code our mission.

As we enter house, she first go on generator, kon on dstv dey show Africa magic (the channel u see in most Nigerian homes...eeeww) , then as the guy, I made the badoo move ,

I held her hands and was complimenting her on how soft it was while __ kissing it, she started __softly, so I pulled her towards me and then...ghen ghen!, the main action started

After the action film ended, she showed me her wedding photos, it felt awkward and weird to me.

kay1one2:
Mohammed's products! Causing havoc since 600ad. Riffraffs!!

2rhymestharap:
na so Ibadan girls dey do....

DanceVille:
Hey Guys, Let's have some fun to start the Weekend..
.
Drop a funny joke that would make someone to burst out laughing...
.
Here's mine:
There was a day I was going to the Library, so I saw a lady going which I thought was "Chinny" my Gf..
I approached the lady without knowing that she wasn't 'chinny'..
I was trying to gave her a hug and the next thing I received was a "Sounding loud Slap"..I thought I was dreaming buh It seems like reality...I started prostrating for her infront of all Students and my colleagues...
God saves me that day, that she didn't reported me to the V.C, I would have been rusticated...
.
Drop yours and let the fun begins...

concord129:
Step-by-Step Boxing Training
Program
By azeez olanrewaju lateef
Preparing to step into the boxing ring
requires a high level of muscular strength,
stamina, agility and endurance. Boxing
requires powerful punches, quick jabs,
slips and blocking for multiple rounds,
making it one of the most physically
demanding sports. Boxing workouts
consist of interval training, sprints and
boxing drills to develop muscle, power
and speed and to improve technique.
Engaging in a boxing training program will
help improve your overall athleticism.
Step 1
Perform jump-rope intervals three days
per week to increase stamina. Jump rope
for two minutes and rest for 60 seconds to
allow your heart rate to recover. Repeat
for five times. Take a 60-second rest.
Increase to four minutes and rest for two
minutes. Repeat five times. Rest for 60
seconds. Jump for six minutes and cool
down. Doing intervals simulates the
physical demands of a boxing match.
Step 2
Engage in resistance-training workouts
three days per week to develop muscular
strength and power. Perform compound
exercises that work multiple muscle
groups at the same time such as squats,
pushups, pull-ups, lunges, triceps dips and
the overhead shoulder press. Perform
each exercise for four sets of 12
repetitions. Train with moderately heavy
weight to challenge your muscles.
Completing eight repetitions should be
difficult.
Step 3
Perform sprint workouts two days per
week. Sprint for 100 meters and walk
back to recover. Repeat for five sets.
Perform timed sprints for 100 meters for
five sets. Record your times and increase
your speed with each sprint. Try to
improve your times with each sprint
workout.
Step 4
Participate in shadow boxing and bag
work three days per week to improve
technique. Perform shadow boxing for
one minute, using a combination of hooks,
jabs, cross punches and uppercuts. Rest
for 60 seconds. Practice a jab and cross-
punch combination on the heavy bag for
one minute and rest for 60 seconds.
Repeat one minute of the shadow-boxing
combination. Rest for 60 seconds. Perform
a hook and uppercut combination on the
heavy bag for one minute and rest for 60
seconds. Finish the circuit with one minute
of speed bag punches and rest for 60
seconds. Repeat the boxing circuit five
times.

concord129:
Step-by-Step Boxing Training
Program
By azeez olanrewaju lateef
Preparing to step into the boxing ring
requires a high level of muscular strength,
stamina, agility and endurance. Boxing
requires powerful punches, quick jabs,
slips and blocking for multiple rounds,
making it one of the most physically
demanding sports. Boxing workouts
consist of interval training, sprints and
boxing drills to develop muscle, power
and speed and to improve technique.
Engaging in a boxing training program will
help improve your overall athleticism.
Step 1
Perform jump-rope intervals three days
per week to increase stamina. Jump rope
for two minutes and rest for 60 seconds to
allow your heart rate to recover. Repeat
for five times. Take a 60-second rest.
Increase to four minutes and rest for two
minutes. Repeat five times. Rest for 60
seconds. Jump for six minutes and cool
down. Doing intervals simulates the
physical demands of a boxing match.
Step 2
Engage in resistance-training workouts
three days per week to develop muscular
strength and power. Perform compound
exercises that work multiple muscle
groups at the same time such as squats,
pushups, pull-ups, lunges, triceps dips and
the overhead shoulder press. Perform
each exercise for four sets of 12
repetitions. Train with moderately heavy
weight to challenge your muscles.
Completing eight repetitions should be
difficult.
Step 3
Perform sprint workouts two days per
week. Sprint for 100 meters and walk
back to recover. Repeat for five sets.
Perform timed sprints for 100 meters for
five sets. Record your times and increase
your speed with each sprint. Try to
improve your times with each sprint
workout.
Step 4
Participate in shadow boxing and bag
work three days per week to improve
technique. Perform shadow boxing for
one minute, using a combination of hooks,
jabs, cross punches and uppercuts. Rest
for 60 seconds. Practice a jab and cross-
punch combination on the heavy bag for
one minute and rest for 60 seconds.
Repeat one minute of the shadow-boxing
combination. Rest for 60 seconds. Perform
a hook and uppercut combination on the
heavy bag for one minute and rest for 60
seconds. Finish the circuit with one minute
of speed bag punches and rest for 60
seconds. Repeat the boxing circuit five
times.

ochejoseph:
[/quote]Mr Immorality, even if you're not ashamed of ursef, pls be ashamed of ur forefathers.[b]

ochejoseph post=31349737:

Mr Immorality, even if you're not ashamed of ursef, pls be ashamed of ur forefathers.[quote author=ochejoseph post=31349737]

CaptainAmerica1:
Girl: Hey Boo, can you please send me airtime?

Guy: Okay babe, how much do you want?

Girl: N1500 would be just okay

Guy: Just give me a minute baby

Guy: 4357 3246 8843 3968

Girl: What network?

Guy: Cartoon NETWORK

Boys are not smiling

Davidairmarshal:
What a woman can do, a man can equally do.

OgologoDimkpa:
Not surprise at all cos an average Muslim is a potential terrorist

OgologoDimkpa:
Not surprise at all cos an average Muslim is a potential terrorist

MrUzo:
I came all the way from ikeja, to Ago Palace way to meet up with someone, though the man jokingly told me to come with a jeep due to the state of the road. But in my mind I was like, how bad could such a road be that I haven't passed before (mtcheew).. But on getting there I was so shocked to see how dilapidated the roads were. I was so vexed because water was almost beyond the half of my tire even almost over running the tires in some parts of the streets. And it's not just ordinary water, it's dirty mouldy water. I remember he warned me to switch off my AC too while moving in the water. And this was around "September 2014"...When I was done with what I came to do for him, I told my self I was gonna come back to this place with a CAMERA to capture all of this.. Fast forward till Yesterday ( 04 March 2015) I visited again, and this roads are still the same way the were, no work has started in the streets, and the most annoying thing is that virtually all the streets to the left and to the right of "AGO Palace Way Road" are bad. And the are very long streets, even the Ago palace way is a very long road, half of it has been put interlocking the other half is just nothing to write home about. I took like 50 pictures and 8 Live Video's as I drove by.

It's a such a pity to know this kind of place still exist in lagos called "Ago Palace Way. I need to clear the air about this, am not being partisan neither am paid to this, but am only being patrotic to try to see how I could draw the eyes of the world the to this area which seems to have been neglected by this present. Administration. Under Governor Fashola.

And this is one one Governor I have so much respect for, I love his personality, how love he decides to take up a challenge, focuses on the challenge and gets it solved..


I watched how he took up the many challenges facing lagos, tackling them one after the other even though he didn't finish all but he had performed wonderfully well so far..

But I have an observation, I noticed he worked more in his first tenure than the second. Because I was expecting the momentum he used throughout the first tenure to continue in the second tenure but don't think they are comparable.. For instance, the first tenure you will easily find a street among 6 streets within a local government with road construction company men on ground working even even when election date wasn't close at all.. But in this 2nd tenure that's not the case.. One of my biggest observation in lagos is the abandonment of inner streets in some popular places of the city like Ikeja, Ojota, Alapere,Ketu,Oshodi, Okota, Ago Palace,etc. Some people may say am myopic for basing my observation on that, but that's what I like observing first in a government (road infrastructure). Sometimes I always wonder if this streets have a local government chairman but if you go meet the Chairmen they will tell you they don't have direct access to the funds.. that's it's with the governor.

Though, still on still, that doesn't make me loose respect for Gov.Fashola, his still the best governor Nigeria has ever had no doubt and his achievement in the various sector below speaks volume atleast the one I observed

Education sector: He really changed the face of public school, I don't think any governor beats him in this sectors.. Right in front of my eyes, student of Public Secondary School are getting A's and B's in WAEC.. the one I saw with my eyes at a cyber cafe 4 years ago of an Ojota secondary school girl.. I wan amazed, you don't wanna know how it use to be before.
What's about the structure of the school now, it's masterpiece.

Electricity: Powering street lights with generator and court houses also. Phenomenal achievement!

Also for Agriculture, Health sector, Transport system etc.. tuale to the Governor...

jones501:
1.4m students write UTME exam Monday


The Joint Admission and Matriculation Board, JAMB, has said that the 2015 Unified Tertiary and Matriculation Examinations, UTME, will commence next week March 9, across the country.

Its Public Relations Officer, Mr. Fabian Benjamin, told Vanguard, yesterday: “All the logistics for the examination have been put in place and the examination will start on March 9 across the 400 centres in the country.”

He explained that the examination will last for 10 days, adding that it will be rounded off on March 21.
“There are going to be breaks during the days, but the exams are going to run for 10 days,” he added.

http://www.vanguardngr.com/2015/03/1-4m-students-write-utme-exam-monday/#sthash.jvJfiWf9.dpuf

jones501:
[b]1.4m students write UTME exam Monday


The Joint Admission and Matriculation Board, JAMB, has said that the 2015 Unified Tertiary and Matriculation Examinations, UTME, will commence next week March 9, across the country.

Its Public Relations Officer, Mr. Fabian Benjamin, told Vanguard, yesterday: “All the logistics for the examination have been put in place and the examination will start on March 9 across the 400 centres in the country.”

He explained that the examination will last for 10 days, adding that it will be rounded off on March 21.
“There are going to be breaks during the days, but the exams are going to run for 10 days,” he added.

http://www.vanguardngr.com/2015/03/1-4m-students-write-utme-exam-monday/#sthash.jvJfiWf9.dpuf

jones501:
1.4m students write UTME exam Monday


The Joint Admission and Matriculation Board, JAMB, has said that the 2015 Unified Tertiary and Matriculation Examinations, UTME, will commence next week March 9, across the country.

Its Public Relations Officer, Mr. Fabian Benjamin, told Vanguard, yesterday: “All the logistics for the examination have been put in place and the examination will start on March 9 across the 400 centres in the country.”

He explained that the examination will last for 10 days, adding that it will be rounded off on March 21.
“There are going to be breaks during the days, but the exams are going to run for 10 days,” he added.

http://www.vanguardngr.com/2015/03/1-4m-students-write-utme-exam-monday/#sthash.jvJfiWf9.dpuf

Kaybaba5:
Mayhem was let loose in Ago Igbala in the Ibafo area of Ogun State on Thursday after a mentally-challenged woman was caught with a dead newborn baby.

It was said the woman, popularly called Tope, was playing with the baby at a refuse dump in the area, when a passerby saw her and raised the alarm.

PUNCH Metro gathered that Tope dropped the baby and took to her heels when a mob confronted her. She was said to have been beaten up by the mob, who reportedly chased her towards the Ibafo police station, a few kilometres from Ago Igbala.

Our correspondent learnt that Tope, who was said to be in her 40s, was later rescued from the crowd by the policemen from the station.

In a visit to the area, some residents and eyewitnesses told PUNCH Metro that Tope was mentally ill while others said she might be pretending.

One of them, Samad Kolawole, said, “I came to Ibafo five years ago and I have known her since then. According to what I heard, she has been like that for years. We were all surprised when we saw the baby with her. Probably, somebody dumped the child somewhere, and she picked it.

“Although I was not part of the people that beat her up, the rampant case of using human parts for money ritual prompted them to do so.”

A trader in the area, Mrs. Janet Fabiyi, said the child might have been used for ritual purpose and dumped in the neighbourhood.

“Some wicked parents can decide to throw away their baby just because of poverty or if they are not ready for parenting. It can also be that the baby was used for rituals and dumped,” she said.

However, an okada rider, Bashir Rasaq, said Tope might be hiding under lunacy to perpetrate evil. He said she had not shown up in the area since after the incident, adding that her paraphernalia was later set ablaze by the mob.

He said, “I don’t think she is mentally ill. She ran towards police station for safety. That is why I am suspicious of her. Since that morning till now (Saturday evening), we have not seen her, whereas she used to come here every day.”

The Ogun State Police Public Relations Officer, Muyiwa Adejobi, confirmed the incident.

According to him, Tope was breast-feeding the baby when she was attacked by the mob.

He said, “Yes, we have a case of such. The mad woman was seen in possession of the dead baby ─ a day old baby. We rescued her from a mob. She did not kill the baby. She just found the dead baby where it was dumped. No clue on the person who dumped the dead baby. We are still on that.”


http://www.punchng.com/metro-plus/mob-beats-up-woman-found-with-dead-baby/

ClintonNzedimma:
I was in the kitchen about 40 minutes ago only to check outside the window and see goats on top of a building, its very suprising
https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-7q4jSMNp6y0/VPRipqIr-wI/AAAAAAAAAKo/fRGDTBSpWio/s640/blogger-image--2064831302.jpg
https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-h-FkeuItqxY/VPRisFWkOiI/AAAAAAAAAK4/7ZyA0MYShJs/s640/blogger-image--4388791.jpg

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-KHNrHsDoYzk/VPRim-h7mTI/AAAAAAAAAKY/3p9SAM1iB04/s640/blogger-image--1147513092.jpg

source: www.clintonnzedimma..com

acenazt:
hmmmmm what a clueless fella. i piety your intuition and childishly gullible resolve. you are blinded by religious sentiments and crappy propaganda. i feel sad for this nation's future.

acenazt:
hmmmmm what a clueless fella. i piety your intuition and childishly gullible resolve. you are blinded by religious sentiments and crappy propaganda. i feel sad for this nation's future.

acenazt:
hmmmmm what a clueless fella. i piety your intuition and childishly gullible resolve. you are blinded by religious sentiments and crappy propaganda. i feel sad for this nation's future.

Odehfamily:
Sai GMB!!!
Sai Professor!!!

From this photo, you will know that, the story of Kalakuta is false..

lalasticlala:
Wow!!!


This is serious ooo



http://www.temisblog.com/2015/02/lol-check-out-how-couples-who-met-at.html?m=1

Kennywills7:
I always tell people dat APC and PDP use dis rice to buy peoples conscious and wen dey win, its about making money dey spend and also making profit because u make profit in any business u execute

Equalizer:
What's the difference between the Senate and house of Representative? Politically inclined personnel in the house should help me out here cos from what I can observe from here is that they both perform the same function which doesn't make sense.. E.g Senate summons Jega today and Tomorrow you will hear again that House of Reps want to summon the INEC boss on the same issue.. please I need to be clarified here..

onyenro:
http://www.elombah.com/detail.php?world=30054

mutter:
You had no right to flog them.

You should report them to their parents immediately. They are responsible for the children and need to know.
If they believe it or not is no longer your problem.

For God`s sake don`t go asking their teacher or anyone else. That is wrong because the kid`s are not in your care.
You know I was just trying to imagine you catching them and flogging them there. It is a perverse picture,

This kind of thinks happens among siblings, it actually occurs at a much younger age- not sex but the curiosity about each others bodies.

That it developed into this is because there was neglect and lack of parental care.