₦airaland Forum

Funny thread

One cant even differentiate the Original 'wailers' from the chinko wailers.

Goodnews from a yeye tabloid. They cant even write a simple sentence devoid of error. Rubbish!!!

Pronmix:
True, it turned out like smallville, almost predictable, but fron seasons 1 to 3 is alright.

exactly!

queenfav:
Please,I have been getting a lot pm's from nairalanders who have commented on this thread.They are concerned as to what is being done to recover the 115k.All I can say is that,I have advised @peaches exhaustively on the steps to take.However,she is actually the only person who can answer questions on the progress made or steps taken so far.All enquiries should be directed to her because I am not officially handling the case as many wrongly presumed.

And here I was thinking it was only me being bombarded with PMs asking for update.

Pronmix:
Chief try Narcos, Scandal,Breaking bad, Flashpoint.

Scandal became boring at some point

femi4:
Gboliwe na female

6:42am On Feb 07, 2011

"July last year I was swindled by a con man who claimed to work for an oil company and in the middle of his 'i'm going to help you get a job with Shell' I could see through his lies, but I kept on going to avoid people blaming me if my instincts were wrong. At the end of it all, my loss was a meal I bought for the fool, a night at a cheap hotel and a phone that could only send msgs.
The con man had eyes on sister's laptop and N50k I said I had in my a/c."

All these mushroom investigators (insult unintended) could you guys please go and find out where Jennifer's parents are? They need to know what their daughter is doing in Benin city

r231:
So you be woman

My brother! Follow me and see o! Anyway, if it makes them happy, i'll be a female for them.

bashydemy:
Stop disgracing yourself my friend, He is from Abia and the first Executive Governor of Abia state.


Ogbonnaya Onu
Ogbonnaya Onu was the first Executive Governor of Abia State, Nigeria from February 1992 to December 1993. Wikipedia
Born: December 1, 1951 (age 63), Abia, Nigeria
Nationality: Nigerian
Political party: All Progressives Congress

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ogbonnaya_Onu

SMH. Ordinarily, I don't respond to educated illiterates like you. But, I had to quote this for emphasis.

Enjoy basking in your ignorance. I am not in the mood to take up an unpaid teaching job especially with you as my student.

mykl01:
Hmmm. TA? The guy dey manage himself o! If he shouts now, dem go unveil him dirty deals. Best be seen as passive than the unearthing of earth shattering corrupt practices.

His corrupt practices will wow even the devil himself. It's that bad! Very useless man

drss:
List of Angels And Saints for Buari's Holy Cabinet:
1. Saint Chris Ngige (Anambra)

2. Angel Kayode Fayemi (Ekiti)

3. Angel Rotimi Amaechi (Rivers)

4. Saint Babatunde Fashola (Lagos)

5. Saint Abdurrahman Dambazau (rtd) (Kano)

6. Angel Aisha AlHassan (Taraba)

7. Saint Ogbonaya Onu (Abia)

8. Angel Kemi Adeosun (Ogun)

9. Angel Abubakar Malami SAN (Kebbi)

10. Saint Senator Sirika Hadi (Katsina)

other saints and royal angels of the Holy Cabinet are:

11. Saint Barrister Adebayo Shittu (Oyo)

12. Saint Sulaiman Adamu (Jigawa)

13. Angel Solomon Dalong (Plateau)

14. Angel Ibe Kachikwu (Delta)

15. Saint Osagie Ehanire (Edo

17. Saint Udoma Udo-Udoma (Akwa Ibom)

18. Saint Ahmed Isa Ibeto (Niger)

19. Angel Ibrahim Jibril

20. Angel Audu Ogbeh (Benue)

21. Saint Amina Mohammed (Kaduna)

These men and women are holy, corrupt free and upright. They are totally sinless and worthy enough to serve in d holy cabinet of god buari.

Stop naming Ogbonnaya Onu against Abia. He isn't an indigene nor does he live in Abia. I thought those where the conditions to be eligible to represent any state.

There is no Saint yet for Abia state

ddippset:
is it because nobody has set a panel on him, that's why he's making noise here and there? He who was trying to give himself life incentives and looted akwa ibom? If amaechi cannot be a minister, akpabio cannot be a senator.

You can tear your boxers and run into the market bro. It doesn't change the fact that Akpabio is stubborn and the Senate needs stubborn men like him unlike the docile ugly T.Orji.

Sanchez01:
Akpabio has raised an issue. According to him, the list is incomplete; he charged the Senate president to know when the next batch would be ready. Akpabio's claim is that a 21-man list is not in any way constitutional.

Akpabio is a very stubborn politician. The senate needs people like him not like that T.Orji who is just there to siphon more.

With the iron of mismanagement and corruption hanging on Fashola and Amaechi, having them in the list tells a lot. Anyway, what's my own?

That's quite a role to play but if the husband doesn't swing into action, who would?

Defend her all you can Sir, if she stole our money let her return it and do the time commensurate to her "thievery".

28 constant hours daily. The body odour is too much. Almost suffocating!

EmmaGold007:
Doh...... Here in Enugu dem no day give light na Dash dem day dash us.... #StableCurrent 24/7

It has always been like that in a very looooong while. I envy you guys

WTF is "thin god"

Gone are the days I read newspapers to improve my use of English. Shame on this crop of incompetent Editors and reporters.

We have as a people been rapedd both ways. Shame on us.

See the kind of people youths celebrate.

proxillin:
This happened live and direct in my church.

There is this woman in her 40s who usually sits at the pastor's office. I noticed she behaves like someone undergoing mental deliverance. I remember few times when church prayer warriors organize special prayers for her.

She was healed yesterday and our pastor was happy. I am very close to the pastor. When we were together, in his happy mood he told me what happened to the woman.

The woman was a Deeper Life member (this is not intended to paint any set of people bad. This is a real life story. I have to state out all the facts. Apologies to Deeper Life Christians).

She met her man in the same church. They were both Virgin. Based on Christian doctrine - No sex before wedding.

After wedding, she expected the man to start making moves, nothing was happening. The husband is like a serving junior pastor in the church.

She started making the moves. And whenever she does, the man was always giving excuses.

"I will minister today, I have to prepare my sermon notes"
"Its a prayer night...I want to be clean before God"
"Blah blah"

The woman could not longer take it. One day, she closed the door, forced herself on him, brought out his pinis, tried to arouse it, nothing happened.

That was when the woman started asking questions. After a lengthy argument, he confessed that he is impotent. And he has been keeping it a secret from his wife (A pastor for that matter).

This lady is core believer (You know deeper Life people na). She decided to stay. No divorce in Christianity. Once you swore an oath on the alter, you are in it for life. Based on her own believe ooooooo. Not mine. Because some churches may not divorce, but separation is allowed especially when they are endangering their own lives through fights and others.

She stayed in the marriage for 20 years. Her younger sister who got married after her now has 3 kids. She is still single and a virgin.

Her ability to bear all this tribulation started running down. She started having mental issues.

The first one happened, when her sister was celebrating her daughter's birthday. They had a little disagreement and she scattered the whole party. When they called family meeting to settle the issue was when she busted out and told her people "Can you Imagine, I am still a virgin". It was like film trick to the family.

Ever since then, she will be walking on the street, talking alone. If you ask her a question, she will be saying something else.

To cut the story short, someone brought her to our church. Where she has been undergoing reform. My pastor summoned her husband. As pastor to pastor. He told him "You are a wicked human being". "You have sinned against man, and God". Its true you have a problem. You are a pastor, spill your problem out, let the world help you. You kept it secret and even subjected your woman to a marital bondage for years. You have wasted her life. Where do you want her to start from?

The genesis of this no sex before marriage. I am not supporting anyone to engage in premarital sex, however, you need to find a way to know your partner during courtship.

Its either you marry an impotent or a sexomaniac. I remember a man that have sex with his wife 8 times a day. Whenever he is coming back from work, his wife will be crying.

Ladies Learn!

Wonderful! But you forgot to advertise tell us the name of your church.

Again, has the woman been disvirgined already?

What kind of healing did she get?

Is she still married to the impotent pastor?

The hue on this list will certainly make some people run naked into the market place. The speculation is already boring!

Adamawa kwa? Where Atiku is from and he is as an individual richer than the state. Adamawa that can afford N50m for marabouts aka prayer warriors? Adamawa that enjoys special privilege from the presidency because of Madam?

Wondering when this attention seeking governor can set his priorities right. Sorry ndi Imo state, you guys have been scammed yet again.

SmartMugu:
Too many contradictory news on this woman today. Which one do we now believe? If we can't believe the news, how are we sure she's even in the UK?
Lies everywhere.

It's so messed up. I don't believe anything I read in most Nigerian media. You want to remain sane on this, get your news from a foreign tabloid.

Why won't they charge her? What's going to happen in April next year? I am lost o

That guy will soon explode like balloon

Eye opening I must say

stag:
If you have any reason(s) whatsoever to suspect you are being scammed, then by all means, be careful .

Who connected to the other on facebook? I mean was he the one who sent the friend request? Ask some questions only that friend of yours could have known. Scammers sometimes pose as long lost friends, colleague or even family.

And you should remember that the easiest way to be a prey is to appear desperate.

Matter closed. The instinct of man, what some call gut feeling is a very strong part of man. Most wahala can be avoided if we listen to and sharpen our instinct.

Can security be tightened in this country please. Everybody knows that since the terrorist assumed office, nothing, aside pictures is done.

sexydivaomalich:
.

if l hear

You want my autograph?

taryour:
no mind am jare my brother I just found out now. For the very first time in my years on nairaland I took out time on this and I got my answer. lol. Gboliwe now I know. **winks**.

smh. You are not serious.

fwwins:
Wait let me find out the meaning of A B A S H A then the fight will begin.

Edited... Thank your stars I couldn't find the meaning

Mumu

olu4life:
Taaaaa, i know what im talking Though her talks are so masculine but gbagbe, na SHE. Got to know some months back anyways,hehehe
@fwwins haha,how u no go sabi the meaning of abasha? u never hear olamide, IRANU ABASHA

You are not serious, walahi.

In anycase, I am comfortable being any gender ascribed to me. Just wondering why I cant be believed when I say I am she/male

olu4life:
its a SHE!!! #Confirmed a long time ago

Just don't go and implicate yourself o. Hope you will be able to prove it especially when you are asked how you confirmed it. Hmm.

fwwins:
O N I R A N U NI E

iwo abi? abasha