Kape:
How do I even start narrating this my ordeal?
What would you do if you find this on your wife's phone from another guy "i wish you would spend the rest of your life with me", i love you and i will do anything to be with you" and she replied with "i love you more".
This is a girl you married a virgin, young and innocent no ex drama, intelligent and beautiful.

So this is a girl i had always thought i was being unfair to her and always feel i don't deserve her because I've not been entirely faithful, as a man with some change, ladies will always come for you and somehow you can't reject all plus my job does not permit me to be home always. I trust her to a fault and she's an angel in my sight and can do no wrong due to the way i met her and how she carries herself, also a good wife and mother to my kids.

My problem now is, the guy is younger than me, he could be the same age with my wife or a little younger,has some money(all these oil guys) and they are somehow too attached emotionally which makes me feel theirs is beyond the sex.

I always thought as a sharp guy, i have everything under control but i must confess, I'm running mad and don't even know how to handle this like this girl has been playing me all these while or what?

A part of me is asking me to forgive her and assume i wasn't there enough for her emotionally, a part is feeling like i deserve the payback but honestly the African man in me is feeling it's total bullshit for her to cheat on me and in turn act like she's the best thing ever, call me hypocrite, it is what it is, a woman is meant to be forever faithful moreover she is not even aware of anything i did.

Is this seasonal or in parts like Avenger?

Kaamisha:


Take a break from your family. Disappear for 6-12 months. When you come back, they will be grateful for everything you do and not complain again if you don't. If you can do it, you will thank me later. That is the moral of the Biblical story of the prodigal son. The one who disappeared was celebrated after he returned, not the one who was there all the time.

I have never reasoned this thing wey you talk like for Bible oh...

emmaodet:


Hahahaha
Pls make peace with your pale abeg ooo no matter the issues between you guys.
Yea, been a first born in african setting is not funny at all.

Na him disown me no be disown am. Me know say na whining him deh whine.

Kekereekun123:
My mother was called stingy mean and evil for investing while sometimes neglecting us tho she tried her best. Today i dont hate her anymore as she has never asked me for money since i started working. A lot of my colleagues once salary comes parents and siblings chop over 60 to 70%. Lucky for my my mum has rental income and is enjoying her retirement. People should be wise o

My mom is going this way. She is really investing heavily in building and to top it all, she is single handedly training 4 kids whilst my father is alive and doesn't really care about his family. We don't have the best of things, not even close to good but I know when she's retired and I'm working, she will give me time to do wonderful something for her based on the fact she's investing on the future.

emmaodet:


Hmmmmmmm
Capslocked
These are some of the things my parent use when i don't give them enough from what they demanded.
We are only 3 boys in my family and am the first born.
After graduating and luckily got a job, parent my mum in particular placed a lot of burden and expectations on me.
I roofed there house, furnished it and they moved in. After that demand upon demand upon demand from me.
Gave my uncle who is her junior brother 1m to travel out after mum pestered me, gave her my first car (nissan pathfinder) after pressuring family to give it to her, co-sponsored my junior brother to duabi with 500k - now he is working in a company there earning about 250k per month, sponsored another of her family to dubai again late last year.
The most annoying of all is our last born. She told me he wants to go to Europe and i will need to support with 1m from the 4m he needs while others too will raise money. Told her this venture is not feasible because i know others won't drop any money and i can only give 500k that is comfortable for me. Now she said due to inflation and naira devaluation at black market, we will be needing 5m against the initial 4m and she plans selling my land of 1.5m while i still drop 500k making 2m in total.
My wife sparked that enough is enough. Wetin, kilode, se a man so eran meran ki ikan kan ikan pa ni - why would we tie two rams together while one kills the other. Oko o kin je ti baba ti omo ko ma ni ala - No matter the family bond, there should always be a demarcation between a father's land and his son. Never you merge it together.
Funny enough, i had the intention of selling the land several times before but my mum insisted i shouldn't sell it but build it but now that she needs money, the land can be sold.
Whenever i say No to there financial requests, she will start shouting and crying that she knows how she suffered on us, what she went through to train us, hiw she collected loans and cooperatives to make sure we become somebody in life but now that it is time for us to pay back, for her to sit down and start eating the fruits of her labour, we are always complaining.
That if we are considerate, even before she ask for A, we should have provided A B C because of her sacrifice on us, all this she will be saying after calling family meeting on my head with church pastors to mediate on it.
I can't even count the numbers of time pastors and family members have come to mediate on these issues.
Funny enough, it's not as if she is doing bad. She is a headmistress in govt. school earning about 170k per month and with the new minimum wage, she should earn 200k while dad retired as VP in secondary school and taking pension of 70k.
Our 3rd born is on my monthly pay of 20k per month yet always complaining that she is not enjoying me again especially since i got married, that i hardly give lump sum of maybe 100/200k unlike now that i always grumble before giving 20k.
I am really tired Capslocked. Really tired.
I'm working but i hardly buy clothes for myself or use good car or furnished my apartment to taste.
It has always been responsibilities upon responsibilities.

Bro to be first son no be here oh... I be first son tho I never start but I know say na my pman go be problem even tho the man never contributed anything to the welfare of me and my siblings, but as first son I know say na me get the job as my siblings don swear say their papa no go chop their money. But the painful thing be say na still the same man disown me because I refused to stand by him in his lies and told him the blank truth without mixing words. But still na my papa... Na him disown me no be disown am.

Yellowblack:



Yeah it not an easy thing to do.... That is why you kill devote your time nd focus on how to earn it

Well the right advice to give jaycerichh should be that she should focus on his skills. I think he pointed out he could sing, let him focus on that and learn other things to augment it like what I tagged him earlier with.

jaycerichh aka Mr Alfa boy! The people who make the best and most out of relationships are those who have a particular time they date and what reason they date. They don't date willy nilly. You are a young man, use this time to learn stuffs that will help you. Learn python, writing or whatever. I made the same mistake as you and I realized myself almost same time as you. Forget about women and focus on things you need.

Yellowblack:
This alfa stuff sef...... What's it all about?
Drop the link lemme read it.....






As for the OP the time you could hav use to make money nd focus on yourself @20 You dey use am Bleep...


Better make money nigga nd forget about girls for now ❌❌❌

Is it about making money? Why do y'all clamor making money like it's one easy thing to do.

Tbh with you, there's no difference between that which you pay for and that which you will pay for.

Chidinwite1:
good pm good people of this great forum, im about to lose the girl i love so much due to her moms wish nt to marry anyone outside her tribe, this is a relationship of 5years. i love this lady so much ,i need your advice good people, im depress

Let go of her.

Casemiro:



It is actually wired,


some girls tell you NO

but deep down they mean yes.

It is very confusing.


a lady will visit and if you make advances she'll resist. Leave her alone, and tomorrow she'll tell her friends that you are not man enough.



Things may be going on well and you spend on her, and you both happily have conjugal bliss like adults, but if you break up or things doesn't go right she may wake up tomorrow and claim you raped her

Remember the story of Ronaldo and many others.


I could go on and on, but I'll keep it short.


The question here is,

What is consent? How do you tell that she has agreed?


This is to avoid claims of rape tomorrow.

Baba yes is never no, and no is never yes. Those who go ahead to coerce women into saying yes when they actually said no will suffer it later when that girl decides to ruin his life. First thing, when inviting a girl to your crib, make her know you both will get intimate and that if she's no ready she shouldn't even come over and waste your time. If eventually she comes over and you both are done, for the sake of your mental safety in the future, keep a receipt of your sex. Call her and put it on record or you text her to inquire if she enjoyed her sex with you, make sure you get a definite answer from her then save it in case she decides to be a loose nut. Again if she says no, stand up tell her to leave your house and don't even listen to her if she says she wants it, it's a big trap.

MadeINchenzen2:
since when?

Let's say the ban will be ending by Tuesday.

sweetmelanin:


I think you are the shallow one here who has clearly refused to reason!

1. Why is Bill Gates (a college dropout with no medical background) suddenly the spokesperson for global health?
2. Why is the vaccine (which we have no idea of it's long term effect) being pushed to be mandatory?
3. Why is Bill Gates pushing for digital identification of those who have been vaccinated (ID2020)?

Your answers here.

1. It because Bill Gates can and has hired special health professionals.

2. Is it better we stay without a vaccine? It is being pushed because that's the only remedy at hand right now and no one has come up with a different solution.

3. So that it will be easy to identify those who has been vaccinated and to avoid overdose which will result in waste if resources and also to help in the study of the curb of the virus.


And unless you have another solution, I suggest you shut that hole you call a mouth.

pansophist:


Feminism is a cancer of developed, service-driven societies, alongside depression, lack of purpose, and wage slavery.

If you observe, it is the rich countries, a countries that untold amount of men have sacrificed their lives to build, are the ones that has feminism. Life became so perfect, and women became so bored. In Europe, it is the UK, Germany, Ireland, Sweden, etc have man-hating feminists. You won't find them in Russia, Ukraine, Serbia, or countries still trying to be developed. The nairaland's resident feminists are probably based abroad, or at least middle class in Nigeria with time and comfort. So as men are working hard to make life better for the society and their women, expect that in the future, she may call men oppressors for their sacrifices.

This is the first time in the history of humanity that people can actually be bored because of not having anything to do. If you go to rural areas of Nigeria, there is no such thing as boredom there, at least compared to cities. They are either farming, working, walking, or just engaged in physical activities that eliminate the possibility to be idle and digest feminist propaganda. Furthermore, and importantly, I find it deeply sad that African women drink without questions anything that comes from the west, just as they wear foreign hair. You will hardly see any Asian or Indian women drag their men to the western divorce court to rob. These women understood that feminism is a western thing, and not their fight.

The end goal of feminism is the destruction of the nuclear family, and it is successfully reaching its goal so far. Marriage is plummeting sharply in Nigeria, whenever I visit, I see this high-class level of Nigerian women that have reached the zenith of their career but going to an empty house. A deep stares into their eyes, it becomes evident that they are lonely and need affection. Perhaps you can have it all, I guess? I have many well to do friends in Lagos that will rather just Bleep around than marry because they think it makes no sense. Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free? Truly, feminism freed men, no need to voluntarily become the sacrificial lamb of a woman, and that is beautiful.

Preach on brother!

Kingarthur21:
actually feminism was needed at some point,else ladies will not be educated,men will get away with rape,they will not even have access to the internet...
A revolution was needed. But not this type as we know that is not focused on elevating the girl child but making comparisons with men and dragging over petty things instead of big issues.
How many feminists have campaigned for the release of Leah shiruba or chibok girls?

Last year in Nigeria,I was at an eatery. I asked the waitress if she was in the university (I am fond of asking girls if they are in school). She said she scored 243 in Jamb,got admission in Abia State university but the father refused to pay the acceptance fee. His reasons?he can't pay that jumbo sum for a girl since she will end up in a man's home as a house wife so she had to source for funds by working.

How many feminists will take this up?their own is just to argue online about packing of their husband plates.
Modern feminism is a joke

And you wanna believe the story of that girl? That she scored 243 and her parents couldn't sponsor her cause of she will be another man's property. If you believe that story, I am quite sorry for you. Cause those are pity stories hauled by girls to cover up the fact they couldn't further. Next time when you visit eateries, instead of asking them if they are in school, try "why choose this job".

Martinez39s:
I loved Ababio's Chemistry textbook. I didn't read the Chapter on Phosphorus since it wasn't in my syllabus, and I didn't read most of the hard metal part. The book is solid. I enjoyed the Organic Chemistry part the most.

Nerd. No offense tho

Kingarthur21:
the earlier this ladies realise that they are shooting themselves on the foot with the man hating feminism peddled now(I am not referring to genuine elevation of the girl child which I support) the better.

Here is a statement if regret from a former modern feminist:

Feminism freed men, not women. Now men are spared the nuisance of a wife and family to support. After childbirth, if his wife's waist doesn't return to 20 inches, the husband can go out and get a more petite woman. It's far more difficult for the wife, now tied down with a baby, to find a new man. My blind date that Friday waved goodbye as he drove off in his RV. I walked home and paid the sitter with laundry quarters.
Feminism made women disposable. So today a lot of females are around 40 and single with a couple of kids to raise on their own. Child-support payments might pay for a few pairs of shoes, but in general, feminism gave men all the financial and personal advantages over women.

What's worse, we asked for it. Many women decided: you don't need a family structure to raise your children. We packed them off to day-care centers where they could get their nurturing from professionals.

It all started when women thought they could a thing and get away with it.

MadeINchenzen2:
u hate the MODs right?

Quite frankly, yes

Thunder fire you oh! Because na you airpus build am.

JAOS:
to those of you here in nairaland YOUR DAYS ARE NUMBERED

Go to hell you deranged, low quality IQ, slowpoked simp.

Kingarthur21:
Ladies are at the mercy of their own self esteem and self worth,SOME ladies see and treat themselves like rag,don't comport themselves well and blame men for how they view them.

Empower a lady with rights,she will not use it to improve herself,become the first female president,change history but rather use it to shake her bum bum on internet and when you don't value them you are called misogynistic.

People who deserve honor,get honor,not all men and women should get honor,but the ones that deserve it.
I call dead beat dads,wife beaters,men that cheat irresponsible... I will also call girls that aren't responsible irresponsible


What you women want is respect and value no matter what for being a woman,but a man has to earn respect.
there have always being enough narrative for responsible men,how they should act and behave but when you hold ladies to some standards you are oppressing them
Live your life the way you want but don't force us to value you. As long no one harms you or rape you,no one owes you honor if you don't merit it. If I sleep with you and dump you ,I have done no wrong in the eyes of the law except the sex was not consensual.

Coming online to rant and guilt trip men will change nothing.


Ladies value yourselves

This has always been what I have been thinking but didn't know how to say it.

You know, now that I've read your first post, I think I do care. I was banned for expressing myself too. It's disheartening.

Tell you what, I take my first and second comment. The second being if you are no more interested.

MadeINchenzen2:
I know and screw u

Where and when?

potbelly:
Preach brother! Preach!

Weird moniker