₦airaland Forum

dunkem21:
Chai ..see as the man bend down like say the 'copter wan chop off his ...cap

Wait, make I look am well well ..e be like say baba wan tear race

It is safe practice to always bend down when leaving a helicopter so that the rotors do not chop off your head.

Naijaonlinegists:
Please my Chairman no just eeh, I wan make little enquiry.
According to the shipping rates you stated above per kg, please is the $13 meant for any type of product of there are just selected categories?
Secondly, I'm located in Anambra, do you ship to Anambra and what could be the expected waybill charges if I decides to ship laptop or smartphones.

Urgent reply needed please.

@Naijaonlinegist, sorry for the late response. The amount quoted is for any type of product. Our Nigerian store is in Makurdi and we do the Waybill thing almost every week. We can definitely have our Lagos shipper to send the items to Anambra state.

Our shipments leave Canada every Friday, arrive Lagos on Sunday or Monday and are normally cleared by Thursday. You can call us at +1 (647) 719-5448.

Mucuna Pruriens or as Idoma's call it, Enumajeje.

The bean is used in Anti-Snake venom medication and for Parkinson's Disease. African Science 101.

A Jewish supplier of mine told me a couple of years ago that the Chinese have been shipping containers of sand out of Nigeria for some time.

Sand alright but gold nugget containing soil taken to china to be processed. For anyone to ship sand containers, the gold content of that sand must be astronomical. Now you wonder why there is all the fighting in Plateau state. The elite know what is in the land they send innocent people to go and die for.

So much work for the incoming government.

dutchjongen:
Nigerian Petroleum Developent company(NPDC) and CBN refused to open their financial statement to PWC.SO the report is dead on arrival,another audit has to take place. It has no credibilty go to premium times and read the audit. NNPC is the definition of corruption here are some excerpts from the report:
" We requested for meetings and information from the Central Bank of Nigeria (“CBN”) but were not granted access to nor given the
requested information by the CBN"page 196
" We requested for meetings and information from the Nigeria Petroleum Development Company (“NPDC”) but were not granted access to nor given the requested information by the NPDC"page 196
"The procedures we performed did not constitute an examination or a review in accordance with generally accepted auditing standards or attestation standards. Accordingly, we provide no opinion, attestation or other form of assurance with respect to our work or the information upon which our work was based"
The audit is therefore null and void and a new one has to be undertaken with full access to CBN accounts and NPDC
http://www.premiumtimesng.com/docs_download/Full%20report--20billion%20dollars%20missing%20oil%20money.pdf
[size=16pt]This report has further justified Buhari desire to Probe NNPC [/size]

One thing we all need in our country today is empathy. The people I feel for the most, is the people in the oil producing regions. Their farmland and fishing grounds have been destroyed by this oil.

If all this stolen money is used to build a Dubai like modern city in Bayelsa or Rivers state, I am pretty sure no one would even talk of saying a bad word about Diezani or Jonathan but sadly, none of this money would be used there, rather, some of it is making Dubai grow richer and helping America or Europe's economy while our youths wallow in poverty and joblessness.

What kind of god do these people serve?

dutchjongen:
Nigerian Petroleum Developent company(NPDC) and CBN refused to open their financial statement to PWC.SO the report is dead on arrival,another audit has to take place. It has no credibilty go to premium times and read the audit. NNPC is the definition of corruption here are some excerpts from the report:
" We requested for meetings and information from the Central Bank of Nigeria (“CBN”) but were not granted access to nor given the
requested information by the CBN"page 196
" We requested for meetings and information from the Nigeria Petroleum Development Company (“NPDC”) but were not granted access to nor given the requested information by the NPDC"page 196
"The procedures we performed did not constitute an examination or a review in accordance with generally accepted auditing standards or attestation standards. Accordingly, we provide no opinion, attestation or other form of assurance with respect to our work or the information upon which our work was based"
The audit is therefore null and void and a new one has to be undertaken with full access to CBN accounts and NPDC
http://www.premiumtimesng.com/docs_download/Full%20report--20billion%20dollars%20missing%20oil%20money.pdf
[size=16pt]This report has further justified Buhari desire to Probe NNPC [/size]

Four years ago, Buhari publicly shed tears for this country. Looking through this report and how they brazenly try to cover up various things, I can understand why a grown man would cry for Nigeria.

May the souls of every Nigerian who has died of this man-made suffering as well as the God of all suffering and living Nigerians make life unbearable for all these evil perpetrators and their lineage.

jascon1:
All dis story don tire me. I just wish say I go fit get small money take start one small business to day bring yam from kano to Lagos

How you go go Kano go buy Yam wen Kano self dey buy Yam from other states. Wen dem tell una say make una study geography well, una no gree.

Know thy Country!

Iamfrank:
My pet son came to me yesterday and was telling me how he is ashamed of his own mother.... He said almost every night when their father is not around (he works outside the town) he always sees his mother watching pornographic films in the sitting room..... He says it has been going on for some time now.... He is 18yrs of age.... And that what borders him a lot is that he has 3 younger siblings of ages 3, 9 and 12.... He is just ashamed of discussing it to his mother.... Wat do you tink is the best thing to do?

Let the 18 year old politely tell his mother to watch the porn in private where neither he nor any of his other siblings could wander in on her.

Ahmed4002:
This your address in Makurdi is thrash.
give a full address.

David mark bye pass for where?
High level?
wadata?
North bank?

Canada adress the same thrash.


For me. better I stick with my Lsm global shipping chinosxl

when you ready to start biz. we go check on you.


we watching for now

It amazes me the lack of tact that some people have. If you do not intend to do business with us, that is fine, but that will not stop us from doing business genuinely with genuine business people.

Our username on eBay is naijanetworks, You can check us out. We belong to various IT industry trading lists with a worldwide audience where we have been buying and selling for about twenty years.

@Ahmed4002, If you know Makurdi as you say, You would know that David Mark Bye-Pass is a very popular street. 7 David Mark Bye-Pass, Aii Iyenge Plaza by Empire Suites. We have customers that come from Nassarawa state, Akwa Ibom State and Abuja to name a few to buy and in some cases place custom orders.

We are the most diversified shop in Makurdi selling everything from Consumer goods to photography, Apple computers, sewing machines, Air compressors, Air conditioners to high end Networking equipment like Cisco routers and switches and we own all our own equipment.

Was the baby bouncing before delivery or he started bouncing after he landed?

crossblane1:
How much to ship a plasma TV and a mobile phone to Nigeria

What size of Plasma TV?

Obinoscopy:
It's definitely going down. Check the staircase slabs in the picture, you'll see that it is from top down. Engineers would agree with me on this one.

Being a construction hobbyist, that is the first thing I saw. The staircase overhang shows that the cat is going down.

I did not know that fellow African brothers, sisters and other non-Nigerians were closely following Nigeria's elections. A Cameroonian friend came over with beer to celebrate and when I told him I was working and could not drink, he said I had to make an exception as Buhari's win was for all of Africa. He went on to tell me how they all use to be proud of their Made in Nigeria imported Peugeot cars in the 1970's and 1980's. He said coming to work in Nigeria was looked upon as going to France or USA to work.

A while later, a Lady from Togo brought a bottle of wine to celebrate and told me how all Africans in her school were glued to their computers following minute by minute details of Jega's announcements.

A little while later, an Italian friend called to congratulate me. He said they were praying that there would be no bloodshed and when they heard that Jonathan had called Buhari to concede there was a sigh of relief from he and other friends.

Does anyone else have such stories to share?

God bless Nigeria!

Do these guys even have anyone groom them before they venture into Public glare?

You say you are apologizing and then you add this the following to the message.

"Election is a passionate thing and I really regret what took place this morning. I was unnecessarily pushed by Jega to get to that level."

That line alone takes the whole sail out of your apology. There are right ways to do things and because you guys went about them the wrong way, you blame Jega?

Are we talking a French Kiss or a pecks on the cheek?

MissyDee:
Got pictures of weird and odd foods we have in nigeria? Post it Here

1) Edible Winged termites
It goes by different names such as ; Aku "Igbo", Esunsun "Yoruba", Chinge "Hausa", Ogan , Edon doroko "Bini".
They're usually pushed out during the raining season. Termites are rich in protein and packed full of nutrients . Believe me when i say it's really tasty with a nutty flavor. They can be eaten alone as a snack or as an accompaniment to a number of savory dishes.

Source: http://www.dobbyssignature.com/2015/03/edible-winged-termites-aku-ogan-chinge.html

See beta Protein!

You may need to see an E-N-T (Ear Nose and throat) specialist, but I recommend you try the following first.

I had the same thing happen to me for many years and finally got rid of it by doing the following. The smell could actually be coming from something like cotton wool or other external object stuck in your inner ear, your nose or maybe loogies (tonsillolith as the medical kinds would call it) stuck in your throat. Loogies are these horribly smelly stuff that accumulate and stick to your tonsilar crevices after they fall out of your nose. When they mix with stuff like Ogbono soup or Okporoko or other food, God help your nose.

1. Wash your fingers well and rub your index finger far back into your throat around rear of the tongue and the tonsil. Take your finger out and smell it.
2. Drop some garlic oil or some other ear oil into one ear at a time while laying on your side. Let it soak in then turn over and let the excess oil flow out. Use a cotton swab to out all the dissolved ear wax.
3. Properly brush your tongue every time you brush, clean out the loogies with your index finger and clean your tongue with a tongue scraper and make sure you floss daily.
4. Gargle your throat with water about 5 times each time you brush.
5. The most important part, Wash each of your nostrils 5 times by putting water into each, cleaning it with your index finger and then blowing it. After washing each, blow both at once.

Never thought your index finger was this useful right?

If all these fail, have an E-N-T look into your ear nose and throat to see if there are any foreign objects lodged in there. If you need tongue scrapers or any of the oil, leave a message here.

Leave a message if any of these helps. I know how this had caused me to literally suspend my social life at one point in the past. Good luck!

balogunsam:
Brosssss....hehehhe....Lagtech don teach everybody lesson oooo....u even asked for full body photo. There should also be verification services here on Nairaland self to go to and verify people's real identities etc.

@op, you mean eBay USA or eBay Canada?? You need to make more info available o...boys have learnt bitterly

We have been buying and selling on eBay Canada and eBay USA since 1999. We buy and sell wholesale items from store closeouts, Bank and Insurance companies.

We have a physical location in Nigeria at 7 David Mark Bye-Pass in Makurdi.

HP EliteBook 2530p Laptop
1.20GHz Intel Core 2 Duo Processor
1GB DDR2 RAM
120GB Hard Disk Drive
DVDRW
12.1" Screen
Battery
Power Adapter
$100 CDN each (About $80 US)
200 Units Available - Minimum order is 10 units
Items located in Toronto, Canada -

cyril10:
Sorry for the loss of your property.

Does the Name Tag on the Policeman say Hitler?

CULLED FROM SAHARA REPORTERS

More details are emerging on the plot to install an undemocratic Interim National Government (ING) and pre-empt Nigeria’s presidential election scheduled for later this month.

Informed sources disclosed over the weekend that a key element in the plot is the need to forestall a Buhari presidency, for which reason the schemers of the plot have tried to woo the former Lagos State Governor, Bola Tinubu, now a chieftain of the opposing All Progressives Congress (APC) with the offer of being the Vice President in the interim structure.

Even though there are now major obstacles to the plan, it is yet unclear if the schemers have completely set the idea aside.

If Tinubu accepts, then he will be expected to rally the South-West, while IBB would rally the North, and Jonathan the South-East and South-South to accept the idea of an interim administration. They will use the excuse that the present times are not good to hold elections in the country, especially because of what David Mark had already called a state of war with Boko Haram.

But it was Tinubu’s rejection of any form of compromise that now appears to be the greatest obstacle to the ING plot. Sources say this explains the recent outburst of Femi Fani-Kayode, the Goodluck Jonathan Campaign spokesperson alleging that the former Lagos State Governor intends to take over presidential power after the generally-awaited victory of the Buhari-Osinbajo campaign at the polls.

Fani-Kayode wildly alleged that Tinubu has entered into an oath to compel Osinbajo to relinquish the office of VP to him after the election, an allegation and scenario that watchers of the Nigerian polity simply dismiss as both untenable and unrealistic.

Investigations spanning over one week by Empowered Newswire on the interim government plot revealed that the two major schemers in the plot are the President himself, Dr. Jonathan, and former Military president Ibrahim Babangida.

IBB, as he is popularly known, has told close aides that he would have to leave Nigeria the day Buhari is declared winner of the presidential election, a prospect he is working hard to avoid by all means. Jonathan is also said to be under intense pressure to negotiate a soft landing for from power since handing over to Buhari would likely expose the intense corruption that he and the Petroleum Minister Diezani Maduekwe, among others, have perpetrated.

In fact the oil minister is said to be one of the hardest protagonists of a soft landing for the Jonathan presidency, mortally afraid of what a Buhari-Osinbajo ascendancy could mean for her.

Knowledgeable Empowered Newswire sources confirm that IBB held two meetings with Tinubu to discuss the issue of the Interim National Government. The first was held in Lagos before the Council of State meeting the week before the February 14 elections were postponed. The second took place in Abuja home of IBB’s son on the night of the said Council of State meeting.

The sources said that for the first meeting, IBB told Tinubu he had a wedding in Lagos and would like to use that opportunity to greet the former Lagos State Governor. Arriving with his son, he told Tinubu about the need to proceed with an interim government and forget about the election. Tinubu, who was shocked at the proposition, reportedly told IBB to forget the idea.

But on the night after the Council of State meeting in Abuja which considered the subject of the readiness of the Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC) to conduct the election, IBB again invited Tinubu to his son’s house in Abuja. At that meeting, former Head of State General Abdusalami was also present, and to the utter shock and annoyance of the former Lagos State Governor, President Jonathan showed up in a two-car convoy in the thick of the night.

It was at that meeting that IBB and Jonathan promised Tinubu the slot of the Vice President in the Interim government. The sources say Tinubu promptly repeated his rejection of the idea, insisting that the elections are the best and only viable option to choose Nigeria’s next president and vice president.

The interim government plan includes the cancellation of the elections and the imposition of a well-known Northerner as the head of the administration, with Tinubu as VP. The interim government will be put in place for two years, following which new elections would be conducted, with the definite exclusion of Buhari.

Another source revealed to Empowered Newswire that some of the names that have been mentioned as possible heads of the interim government include David Mark, the president of the Senate; General Aliyu Gusau, the current Defence Minister who has always wished to be president “even if for a day”; and Abdusalami Abubakar, also a former head of state.

All three are known allies of IBB. But the name of former president Olusegun Obasanjo was also thrown into the picture when a formal statement from the presidency signed by Dr. Ruben Abati said Obasanjo himself wanted to be head of the Interim govt.

Observers say that formal statement by the president’s spokesperson is the best confirmation that indeed interim governmentG plot is real. Said one source, “If the presidency is saying they know that Obasanjo wanted to be the head of the Interim government, that means the presidency is not only aware of such plans, but is also involved in such a plot.”

There had been previous attempts including monetary and other juicy offers to get Tinubu to prevent the emergence of Buhari in the primaries, and after that, to have Tinubu dump Buhari and enter into a deal with Jonathan to frustrate the potential emergence of Buhari as winner of the presidential polls.

Sources believe that the recent wild allegation from the Jonathan camp that Tinubu was planning to force Osinbajo to relinquish the office of VP after being sworn-in is merely an outcome of the frustration generated first by Tinubu’s insistence that the elections must go on; his rejection of the offer from Jonathan to be VP of an Interim government for two years; and finally his insistence never to dump Buhari.

It is believed that Prof Osinbajo, Buhari’s running mate, has actually never been asked to sign any undertaking or oath of any kind and that he accepted the party and Buhari’s offer to be VP unconditionally. Both he and the APC also over the weekend formally denied any such arrangements.

In the absence of a key figure in the South-West to support and sell the idea of an Interim government, sources said options left on the table is to ensure the elections are “decently rigged” in favor of Jonathan or a crisis precipitated that will lead to Jonathan handing over power to David Mark as the Senate President, as was the case in the First Republic when power devolved to Senator Nwafor Orizu in the absence of the then President Nnamdi Azikiwe. In that scenario, in 1966, the elected civilian leaders had to voluntarily hand over power to the military.

Speculations, backed by a comment by the Supervising Minister of Information Edem Duke, are rife that the INEC chairman, Professor Attahiru Jega, may be asked to proceed on terminal leave sometime this month in line with civil service rules. This option, sources say, would boost the plan to “decently rig the election” in the incumbent president’s favor.

But several legal opinions have been articulated that not only will such a move by the federal government to remove Jega be unconstitutional, it would also rubbish the credibility of the entire electoral process and will result in a definite tailspin into national and international crisis.

appini:
I wish him a quick return. But he cannot run away from the polonium waiting for him here in Nigeria.

The people who handle Polonium to administer on others die very shortly too. Ask the widows of all those who administered it on the Russian in London.

Sanchez01:
President Goodluck Jonathan's interview with Wall Street Journal in which he mentioned that the United States should step into the situation of insurgency plaguing the North. While speaking, Goodluck Jonathan stated that he found no reason to probe anyone whether Nigeria's Democracy had been contravened. The opposition claimed the military had been tilted to rig the election but the President feels nothing of such happened as he believes the stories are cooked up... This can be found just at the tail end of the article on Wall Street Journal


Source: http://www.wsj.com/articles/nigerian-president-wants-u-s-troops-to-fight-boko-haram-1423850893

Listen to Governor Fayose commit Perjury - He admits his involvement in the whole saga.


http://saharareporters.com/2015/02/15/governor-fayose-confesses-partaking-ekiti-poll-rigging-meeting-secretly-recorded-army

Give this a listen

http://saharareporters.com/2015/02/15/governor-fayose-confesses-partaking-ekiti-poll-rigging-meeting-secretly-recorded-army

ishiamu:
Apc have eyes but can not see..... God bless my president God bless nigeria.

Gej till 2019

My president is black my lambo is blue.

Do remember that when we became Africa's economy, the World Bank experts said, Nigeria managed to get there despite what our government ought to do but is not doing. If all the money being mismanaged is put into proper use, we will even get to the point being envisaged before 2040.

For us to be a consuming economy and overtake South Africa which is a Manufacturing economy should show us the humongous potential that Nigeria has.

My President is black, but all your red, blue and other colour Lambos need better cover. Even Boko Haram can decipher that!

tpacalipse:
Forget the statistics; there are three things: lies, damn lies and statistics (Pat Utomi).

Pat Utomi did not coin that. It's been around awhile.

Someone just sent me the following to help him verify . He almost sent them money and I just wanted to let everyone here know that:



CANADIAN TOURIST IMMIGRANTS DEPARTMENTS.


USA Canada UK Australia Singapore Italy Netherlands Japan Malaysia Denmark Germany Finland China Brazil Hong Kong Austria France



DEAR VISA APPLICANT,
LISTEN VERY ATTENTIVELY WE ARE ZONAL TOURIST DEPARTMENT THAT TAKE CARE OF IMMIGRANTS FROM ASIA,AFRICA,AUSTRALIA,EUROPE, SOUTH/NORTH AMERICA THAT ASPIRING TO VISIT CANADA AS A TOURIST TO MARRIOTT HOTEL TORONTO CANADA.


DUE TO THE SYSTEM OF TRANSACTION IN NIGERIA,NOW YOU ARE ADVICE TO CONTACT OUR CENTRAL PROCESSING UNIT IN CAPE VERDE ISLAND IMMEDIATELY AND MAKE THE PAYMENT THROUGH ECO BANK RAPID TRANSFER,BECAUSE WE CANNOT RECEIVE ANY PAYMENT THROUGH WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER HERE IN OUR OFFICE IN CANADA.


AGAIN WE HAVE CONVERT 300 CANADIAN DOLLARS TO YOUR LOCAL CURRENCY NIGERIAN NAIRA{300 CAD=47,605.17 NGN}NOW YOU ARE REQUIRED TO GO TO ANY NEAREST ECO BANK AND GIVE THE BANKERS THIS BELOW INFORMATION,TO ENABLE THE BANKERS USE THIS INFORMATION AND TRANSFER THE PAYMENT THROUGH ECO RAPID TRANSFER FOR VISA AUTHORIZATION LETTER.




BELLOW HERE IS HOW YOU WILL TRANSFER THE PAYMENT THROUGH ECO BANK RAPID TRANSFER FOR YOUR VISA AUTHORIZATION LETTER.


RECEIVER'S NAME : ADMILSON JORGE SANTOS
AMOUNT....................300 CAD=47,605.17 NGN
DESTINATION..............CAPE VERDE

QUESTION..................... AUTHORIZATION

ANSWER........................ LETTER

ADDRESS........................SANTIAGO
ID NUMBER................................322013


NOTE,
ONCE THE PAYMENT IS MADE THROUGH ECO BANK RAPID TRANSFER TO OUR CENTRAL PROCESSING UNIT IN CAPE VERDE,YOU ARE REQUIRED TO SEND US THE PAYMENT RECEIPT,SO THAT WE WILL ISSUE YOU A CONFIRMATION RECEIPT AND SEND A COPY TO AIRPORT IMMIGRATION LAWYER,TO ENABLE THE AIRPORT IMMIGRATION LAWYER ISSUE YOUR VISA AUTHORIZATION LETTER CERTIFICATE FOR THE FINAL APPROVAL OF YOUR VISA.




The above letter is a scam and there are few variations floating around. If you have received something and would like help verifying its authenticity, please paste it and I would be glad to help.


BELOW ARE MY SUGGESTIONS ON HANDLING THE ISSUE!

1. You do not need anybody to help you help you with Canadian visa or immigration forms.

2. You can download and fill the forms by yourself for free.

3. You may use an Immigration consultant or a Lawyer but that does not improve your chances.

4. Go to the Canadian Government website at www.gc.ca and click on the drop down link for Immigration, then select the class of immigration you are interested in.

5. Where fees are required, you will be asked to pay it to the Government of Canada directly.

6. If and when you decide to use are Lawyer or an Immigration Consultant, the Canadian Government will ask you to fill out a form authorizing such an entity to deal with them on your behalf.

7. Please play it safe.

Is it government or people in positions of power trying to collect (spend) security vote? The same way that Boko Haram will be destroyed in 6 weeks?

1. First, call them into a room (one at a time) and ask each what they saw. It could be that they did not see everything.

2. If their description is different, supposing kid A. says Mommy had her mouth on Daddy's weenie, and B says Mommy was holding Daddy's Shlong in her hand, go with B and explain to them that Mommy was helping Daddy shave it.

3. If they both say it was the thing in the mouth, tell them it is not what they saw, when mommy shaves Daddy, it hurts sometimes and since she did not bring any shaving cream she was spitting on it so that Daddy does not hurt.

4. Tell them it hurts so much Daddy will not let mommy do that kind of shaving anymore.

5. Keep your door locked from now on.

6. Tell them whatever Mommy and Daddy do in their house, they are never to go and broadcast outside.

7. Daddy, tell them they should never try that kind of shaving when they get old.

8. When they get old they can find out the shaving by themselves.

9. You are not meant to tell them #8, that one is for Daddy.

10. If all else fails, get Mommy to shave Daddy and let Daddy moan constantly while telling her, "I am never letting you shave me down there again." Make sure they are around when you play this one.