₦airaland Forum

he isnt playing at the moment and that in the long run is not good for nigeria...

kilode100:
I'm sure you don't have a job. See your mouth like should he leave: go and chase him out na



Bad belle

having cut his coat at chelsea. a decade is enough to say goodbye maybe its time he mettles in other waters .

http://www.espnfc.com.ng/blog/football-nigeria/206/post/2993970/five-clubs-chelseas-jon-obi-mikel-could-join-in-january

common sense gone ... who ask you?

419 in high places

eat everything edible ... when you get to your desired fat level ... you then return to your current diet

ghen ghen

PDP for me remains the Biggest party in Nigeria, westAfrica and Africa at large . i can only say that this is a temporary set back ..
CPC islamist party + AD ofe mmanu party = APC
LP anywhere belle face party
APGA is a biafran party
PDP. the true Nigerian Identity..
Maybe greed just got in the way but there is going to be a purge ..
the rotten eggs taken out and the golden eggs given the chance to take Nigeria forward ..
Buhari might be our Moses ..
But in the end we need a joshua..

ok

not so urban..

my brodas... anything fit explode these days...

fayose.... fayose .... find ur ose

so that una go rethief am

who dem epp.... abeg shift!!!

i dont want to hear about you buying it ... i want to see the prices in the market crashing

just quit the job because .............

ambo.... 3billion ... which lagos u dey talk about?

dss dey wait you for gate ..

you had to post all this? you need Jesus

Twaci:
Good morning to everyone, especially Nigerian Americans. They need it most. Happy elections. Don't think I'm crazy for greeting you happy elections, in Nigeria we greet people about everything. You have to get used to this now because you are coming back home. So, Eku election.

I very much understand that you will soon be sent packing from there, so I have taken it upon myself to prepare you for the transition. You have just a little time left there, utilize that time to learn more about Nigeria that you are coming back to.

In Nigeria, we don't have light. Buy power bank while coming. Don't say I didn't tell you. Buy power Bank from there because the ones here are just like your marriages, they don't last. Buy a quality one from the abroad when coming. Also, make sure you charge your phone full before coming here. You should also save money for generator. Buy rechargeable lamps and plenty torchlight too.

Also, save enough money for subscription. There is no free WiFi here. For those of you that will be settling in Lokoja, Jidenna and Co, I'll advice you to buy a glo line. Their network is strong.

Save enough money for emergency transport. You will be deported to Nigeria and by the time you get to the airport, you will need to board a keke from the airport to the badagry refugee centre, from where your ancestors had been shipped to America before. Fuel don cost, transport don increase.

Do you eat moi moi? Learn it. In Nigeria you cannot sit down and order pizza anytime you want. The only order you can make is when you yell to the moi moi seller across the road to bring hot moi moi for you.

Learn proper home training. In Nigeria the only time the police will arrest your parents for hitting you is after you are dead already. And they will later settle the case as "a family affair". If you think you can come here to speak 'innit' for your parents, it's the neighbours that will help them beat you.

Are you a graduate? Doesn't matter. There is no job. Your American accent will not give you a job, except your father knows someone who knows another person that knows a politician, you won't have a job.

Dear American Lover Boy, Nnewi girl will not go Dutch with you. As a matter of fact, no Naija girl will go Dutch with you. You have to prove your masculinity by paying for the date. No one is splitting the bills with you when you take a girl on a date.

When you bruise with a stranger in the market, PLEASE CHECK IF YOUR PENIS IS STILL INTACT.

Learn the Nigerian names of common products. No one will sell "sausage rolls" for you. If you can't call it the Nigerian name- "Gala", no one would have time for you. Noodles is "Indomie". Pasta is "spaghetti". All seasoning is "maggi".

Dear American girl, you cannot dress anyhow you like. Your neighbours will eye you. The random old woman in the market will hiss at you. The random lady in the bus will preach to you. The area boys will jeer you. You might want to report "harassment" to the police, they will arrest you for indecent dressing.

Dear lovers, in Nigeria we don't show public display of affection. You cannot be kissing your boyfriend under the rain. The old woman passing by will invoke thunder to strike the both of you.
These are some of the basic tips to help you adapt after you have been deported. More to come.

#culled from Whatsapp

jidenna...nor do oh... donald go just TRUMPet you comot from yankee

i thot this dude was married? wasted generation

who send em?

return am... u nor deserve am

propaganda....all lies

ok

thieves

ok

y na

the mud you created? swim in it buffalo

Boscojugunu:
i know your type. I won't allow myself to be dragged into d mud with u

and i am sure your mother isnt past menaupause

Boscojugunu:
how old are you. Am sure u were not born when aBdulsalam abubakar handed over government to a civilian

sounds like a joke to you... you have to wake up fro that your CNN inspired TB prophesy..

Boscojugunu:
you must be joking right?

Jonathan ... thank you for showing them how it is done..

hilary is one of your best students