₦airaland Forum

Lezzlie:
I still maintain conventions are what determine marital conducts to a large extent.

Whether this is good or bad I won't explore in debate here.

And I do cook. When I schooled I cooked and most and ate out seldomly.

As a working class, I cook at home seldomly except on Sundays. I have my breakfast and lunch out!

And being born with a dïck is a thankless job. It come with endless responsibilities.....

That's why I laugh at you and your discussing to logical conclusions,. Nothing wrong in that, but till a "compromise is reached" sounds so wuzzy-like.


Women will always think through more with emotions, and you..... Lolz I won't say it.

Favolly:
No be only privacy. Do Nigerian celebs even know what the word means? These people practically live their lives on social media, showing off this and that. Including Linda herself. The issue here is that they don't want blogs carrying negative news about them. But unfortunately, that is what generates traffic on these blogs. Man must wack nah, no? When Linda talks about them bagging endorsements, why don't they complain that they want privacy? Abeg talk another thing.

And even if you want to talk about privacy, gossip is not a crime under the Nigerian laws, or is it now? What Linda Ikeji does is not different from what TMZ, E News, Wendy or Daily Mail do. It's called business. It's not about outsmarting any laws. These things are done everywhere in the world.

Linda actually has the right to say anything about anybody, provided it's not bordering on falsehood which is where libel and slander comes in. She is well within her rights, and she knows it. Gossip is no crime and that's how she earns her living even when most people don't approve of it. Linda does not owe anybody anything. It is her blog and she can do whatever the hell she wants to do with it. And of course, it's understandable for aggrieved parties to react when someone does something they don't like, but then in all things, tact is key. And tact, is what Wizkid lacked here. I mean, whatever the real issues between Linda and Wizkid, the difference is that though they were both using words against each other, his contained the threat of violence, and intent to do bodily harm.
But you could argue that Wizkid played right into her hands and you could be right because if anything, this whole episode has made me realize something I never knew about Linda before...

All these things I'm typing, I'm sure you already know them sef. I've always known you to not be a sentimental person. No fall my hand abeg

Lezzlie:
Marriage still stands. Yes divorce is high but even in the West, marriage is still sought after!

You're Contradicting, how can marital vows be the causative agent to marital failure?

I don't get the point and honestly don't follow.

I've seen cases where men walked away from marriages without even laying a finger on their wives.

Are you telling me you set your own rules in your place of work? Are you telling me you define your own terms of condition where you live? You're subject to comfort to societal rules of conduct. I think you mistake personal conduct and interaction to societal norms.

I won't take the bait of derailment. Whether the society is illiterate or otherwise has no bearingbearing here.

What I stand for this. It is conventional for women to be the primary source of cooked meals in the family. It has been the convention for millions of ages.

Whether it's wrong or right is another debatedebate entirely

Repetition

No words needed here. Just this : Bwahahahahaha!!!

Reaching a logical conclusion? And school date of enrolment waits for them.

Or the argument of buying a piece of land waits for them while other prospective buyers are told to hold on until Mr and Mrs arrive at a logical conclusion.

Looooooooolz!!! The wife must times just has to trust on the good judgement of the husband in most instances.

Damn!!!!

Favolly:
Toni payne always coming for Linda at every slight opportunity! Lol, the beef is real mehn! I mean ur own ex-husband slandered and defamed u… did u sue?

These celebs have deviated from the topic at hand which is that Wizkid threatened to harm Linda! So because she has written things about these people on her blog, they decide to use this as an opportunity to get back at her? Wow!

Linda is not a journalist, she's a gossip blogger and it is not illegal. If she has the tea, she spills. She will post gossips, she will make enemies, but you cannot beat her up just because she is your enemy. You had a chance to sue linda and she would have paid for it… Don't say because you didn't, she can't when someone threatens violence.

Even the gist that was the bone of contention in this matter, up until now wizkid has not refuted it as untrue. There is a difference between defamation of character and a story you do not want to get out. Linda Ikeji has built her brand on telling those stories. But then, if she writes a false story about you, by all means, SUE her for libel which is essentially a written defamation. If you choose to exercise your right not to sue and you choose to threaten her with violence, if she sues you, she wins. Threat of violence is still a criminal offense

People's hatred for Linda is making a lot of people blind to Wizkid's threats. This our society is not getting better in my life time.

bukatyne:
Thanks a lot

I am a mistress in the art of cooking

Lezzlie:
Humans have always and will always change values and ethics. It's part of humanity.

If societal values bring the failure of marriages, the institution wouldn't have survived this long. The vows you took at the alter, the advice and imploration you get from your in-laws when you go for traditional marriage are all societal conventions and expectations.

Couples simply deviate from the codes of their vows during marriage. Did society ask you to punch your wife or ask your wife disregard you?

Yes you conform to what society wants of you.

I believe you have a set code of conduct in your place of work, where you live and how you interact with individuals. That's society for you, nope?

Sentimental escapism to the gallery of gender approval !!!

Bearing babies isn't conventional, lolz. It is a biological reality. It is an inherent mark of evolution nothing can change!!!!

And it's conventional for women to make meals and pay attention to the home font. Men aren't exempted.

But women are more suited. If you call cooking slavery, what do you call breadwinning? As more men are the breadwinners for their families, although women are beginning to step up to the plate but it still a male prevalent occurrence. Balance here is the watchword!

So if there's a stalemate, say, the kids are due for school and both parents can't decide what school they need to enrole the kids into? What then happens.

If the husband doesn't have a final say, Joseph, you're advocating disorderliness and chaos.

Every man should consult and seek his wife support in decision making. But saying the husband doesn't get to decide is.....laughable, even to feminists.


n.b bukatyne, please disregard the mention, I honestly think is NL software glitch. Thanks.

skarlett:
the full gist of the thread is on the first page, that's one thing with business section there's really nothing much to say

joseph1832:
So laveda and lanicky are mutually exclusive? Hmm. I didn't know this...

Lezzlie:
Killer-joe!
Come back , our debate is still on.

skarlett:
alright, kindly edit the email address

skarlett:
oya send it here

bukatyne:
Lezzl ie....

Hope I am safe?

You continually replaced Joesph's name with mine

Lezzlie:
I never said anyone couldn't do what he/she wants in his or her marriage. What I mean is that within their own individual capacity they can do what they want without going against societal framework. Getting married in the face place is a societial convention. So altering the little fabrics in their marriage isn't going against the norm, it is simply being individualistic!

You just endorsed me. Students who pass but didn't write an exam circumvented societal rules and will be in hiding. They are not even exceptions to the rule. They are deviants.

My debate doesn't seek to determine if societal code of conduct or convention are intrinsically good or bad. I'm staying that from the time of humanity everyone has to conform to societal norms and values. Either in marriage, school, profession and religious beliefs. It's all around us. Whether this conformity is good or evil is not within this debate.

My submission is that the role of the couples in marriage stems from societal conventions.

I don't follow here.

Wrong! What brings scuffles at home is individual application of societal conventions.e.g, It's conventional for women to prepare the meals. But is it at all circumstances? These individual application is what bears the need for discord, not the convention itself.

A man should have the final say at home but what if he were wrong? Shouldn't he confide with his wife?

Convention aren't mean to be strikingly uniform. They may have shades but still they are rooted in same ideology

By succumbing to familial pressure, he has fallen under the weight of societial convention.

Humans will always try to redefine conventions and create a new one. It's nothing new. It's social rebellion.

The Anglican Church did it in the spiritual sphere.

Democracy did in in the political sphere against dictatorship and others. Socialism did it on the socio-economic fonts.

Homosexualism, faggotry is trying to break the conventions still. If they do, it will become a norm with social authority.

skarlett:
that's interesting, you can drop ur bb pin here and I'll add u up asap

skarlett:
lol, I'm blushing scarlet yes I am

skarlett:
thanks a bunch dear u too

skarlett:
not yet, soon

Amakortee:
the summary of what men need is SUBMISSION AND RESPECT. then u see the man behaving like a little kid

Lezzlie:
No, bro, it isn't about specifics. It's about the broader sense! For example. Each student will approach an exam problem individually and differently within the scope of his own preference, but he must write them still and the school authorities will score him, accept his work and endorse or fail him. It is so in life. Societal conventions are the norms and prevailing beliefs and customs of the majority which has with time become the acceptable way of civil, social and spiritual engagement!

Joe, you lost me here. Feminism, homosexuality, cross dressing are still deviant forms of behaviour and social conducts. They are no where near conventions or norm. If you were to show up in a female apparel in your office today Monday, I'm sure you would have lit the path to your social and professional isolation

We must differentiate exceptions from conventions, bro. And a man who didn't pay the bride price of his wife is the exception to the rule and not the rule. Need I add that he isn't married in the eyes of God and man? He's open to the curse of man and spirits.

It's still an exception not the convention. And their names still fall within a progenitor in the family.

Exactly!!!! Those are the specifics I hinted earlier. But he did the naming ceremony!!!! That's the framework society has set!!!! He can colour it anyhow (by having his kids bear any name of his choosing) but society has set the framework; he must name them!!!

All humans are conformists. That's why even the most powerful rulers fear going against societal values when they enact laws!!!

skarlett:
lol, alright.

Good morning to you too, yes it did. How was ur night?

obainojazz:
gbrizibgi god.....the god that invented all this stuff.

skarlett:
Rubbish! Collecting VAT as if Nigeria has added value to anyone, no amenities yet they're looking for tax, arrant nonsense!

JigsawKillah:
You can't know Laveda and not know her. Say something else, Boss

mimzy:
Sorry...

mimzy:
Thanks dear..

Lezzlie:
[b]Lolz, you're going into the specifics. Of course individuals have always enjoyed autonomy in personal affairs either in marriage or in personal conduct.

What I'm trying to pass across in reference to the OP is This:


Society has always and will not stop providing the framework on which the conduct of marriage is built.


Now individuals can fit in the colour or texture of clothings or bricks they want to add to this framework set by society in whatever manner they elect.

But they cannot ,within themselves, provide the framework, they will become renegades and legal outcasts since legal systems the world over has always been framed from conventions and customs.

Let me loosen the language: society through convention made it that the man pays the bride price. A couple cannot change this.

Society through norms made it the children of the couple bear their father's name, couples cannot change it without risks.

The role of women what they are expected to do within the confines of marriage, in the broad sense is set by society not the couple.

[/b]

Lezzlie:


All human conducts, including conducts in marriage and gender roles stem from conventions. Conventions are societal norms which have become custom.


So society defines women roles as what their roles and duties in a general broad sense ought to be

HurricaneMIMZY:
Madam, you don't want me mentioning the moderators, do you? You have been deliberately derailing this thread needlessly without even addressing the topic.

What are your intentions? You are a woman too and you should help champion the cause and not derail it.

A pleasant evening to you.

Lezzlie:
The modern society has not fully grasp the role of the modern woman!!!

She is expected to be multitasking and still adapt to modern trends without sacrificing any of her conventional duties and roles.


It's quite a tall asking and society is still at odds to define the role of the modern wife in an agreeable term!


Cc Jos eph1832

Aminat508:
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