virginprincess:
You don't even have shame,exchanging words with a woman and you call yourself a man,REAL MEN WOULD IGNORE.

Babe don't mind them. I'm even tired. They are not real men, just simps trying to forget their broke ass life

Zonefree:

But, are you truly a bittered evening newspaper?

Honey the question you should be asking is. How does someone life affects you, you guys come to this platform to try and insult people you barely know. And you think you are a man
Men don't have time to even insult anybody.
They focus on their lives and that of their family, but here you are arguing with a total stranger, you haven't even called your mum today to send her money, or at least think of a plan to better your life.
Please have sense.
Because you are a simp
And you are simping for poverty

Zonefree:

Thought you said you're off to work

Hook up no be work o...just a friendly reminder.

Jesus loves you.

He loves you too.
Just try not to be bitter hmmm
But seriously o.
You guys are so funny.. the only insults you Know is " bitter Nigerian woman" "evening newspaper" so sad
Don't worry eh, God will help you

Homeboiy:
Open go and help your hopeless and lazy boyfriend to get a job first.

Dumped him. Now you can be lazy with him. But first allow your mother to cook first so you can eat because it's clear you are one of those broke Yahoo boys

Zonefree:

Ok, stagnant poverty.

The difference between me and you is that, while you are comfortable in your failed life, I'm actually worried about mine, so please I don't have time to talk to nuisance and living failures.
Sorry for your failed life, don't worry just because today is not good, doesn't mean tomorrow will not be worse, u are in for a treat. Bye bye lonely bastard

Honestly if I had insulted all men and said men are scam and tried to pull a men are trash card and gotten insulted, I would have kept quiet.
But I said that nairaland so called alpha males that go about insulting and belittling woman are out of their minds. Because in the real world some Nigerian men actually treat their wives as goddess and marriages that I have seen are filled with love and understanding.
While on nairaland, you see them describing a slave when you ask them the attributes of a good wife, they end up describing the attributes of a good slave.

Zonefree:

Rants of a broke and wretched Nigerian girl!

This is Nigeria, we are all broke. Like I said focus on ur miserable life, while I focus on being a better person.
Enjoy your MTN freemode, I'm off to work, you Know, what we normal people do.
Bye
Don't worry, enjoy nairaland

I don't know you o but it's clear that you are one of those moving poverty

virginprincess:
, Op,they will soon come for you with their bitterness and frustrations for saying the honest truth.

My dear, they should come.
They like talking about how women will die alone and shame women for being according to them"evening newspaper". But they fail to ask themselves which woman will want to marry their miserable ass. I don't know about you but I prefer being an evening newspaper than a wife to a broke, brainless Sadist. They focus more about bring women down and telling us our place than actually caring about their own lives.
It's sad really

Please let's be respectful, remember everybody must not have the same opinion as you. Remember that people's opinions are formed as a result of their, childhood experience, environment and life experiences.
So be respectful.

Honestly I don't know what some Nigerian woman are enjoying in their marriages, now if I'm being honest, have seen some beautiful marriages. But I'm here to talk about the so called alpha males on. nairaland.

First of all my definition of marriage is simple.
the legally or formally recognized union of two people as partners. The partners have to promise to love, each other, stay together in good and bad days.

Now if u ask a nairaland Nigerian man what he was in a wife, you will think he's describing a slave. They want a wife they can control, dominate. A woman without an opinion and a housemaid.

In 2022 most women have jobs, some women wake up around 4 sometimes 5, prepare food and bath the children, by 7 food is ready, she sweeps the house and arranges the house. By 8 she takes the children to school and goes to work. Let's say she closes by 6. She rushes to the market, by 7 she is home and done with all her errands. She starts preparing food, bath the children, forces them to do their homework work , ask them to bath and she baths the little baby. By 8 food is ready, everyone eats, she decides to rest for a minute. By 9 she is already tired but has to wash your clothes and the kids clothes, she washes the plates. By 10pm she is done with all the house chores but her office work is still there, she forces herself to do the work. By 11 she is tired and goes to bed
Now this is just an example on what some women go through in day.
Now where is the husband, with a sidechick telling her how his wife doesn't have time for sex, how her body is now shapeless.

No appreciation, no love, nothing. Sometimes the house rent is even being paid by the woman, have worked in an agent office, I Know what am taking about. A woman that will do anything to keep her family including sacrificing her happiness and time. Now you rarely see the so called alpha men praising their wives but it's to come to nairaland. To call caring men simps and to advice themselves on how they are demi gods and should be treated as one.

Some men you dare not say "honey, please I'm on my period, on your way back from work please go to the market" omo all hell will break loose, he will come to nairaland to his fellow idiots to complain how is wife wants to control him. You dare not say" honey please help go to mama praise and buy pepper, I want to bath our child" he will tell his friends that you now have balls.
Like what type of marriage is that sef. marriage Is supposed to be filled with love and understanding, not a master - slave relationship.
Honestly this is why a lot of women now leave their marriages, and the same men will come to nairaland to complain on how women are now too independent and not like our mothers.

In Nairaland if a woman is too independent- don't marry her.
She is too dependent - don't marry her

Like what do you guys want, I honestly pity the men that are taking their advise because in the real world no woman born from 1997 down will tolerate a man with all these ideologies.

marriages in the real world is more understanding, the country is hard so a lot of couples now share responsibility. like my neighbor now he's the one that bathes and take the children to school, his wife is a trader so by 5 she is already on the road. when she comes back she cooks and they all arrange the house including the man and their elder child because in the morning they are all too busy to even sweep the house. now that's marriage. now this man has a job but his job is a 9-5.

honestly don't let nairaland fool you, some people are very happy with their marriages.
the country is hard so a lot of men are being supported by their wives and the men do appreciate and show love to them in public.

honestly I pity any woman that will marry all these so called nairaland alpha males.

Their own is to come to nairaland to insult and body shame women, while they are poor and miserable. Plus according to them women like being treated like shit, women don't like nice guys and will love you more if you treat them like trash. Yes women don't like being treated like the human beings we are, we never get tired and we love being told what to do because our brains are not working. Nonsense

Please let's be respectful, remember everybody must not have the same opinion as you. Remember that people's opinions are formed as a result of their, childhood experience, environment and life experiences.
So be respectful.

Honestly I don't know what some Nigerian woman are enjoying in their marriages, now if I'm being honest, have seen some beautiful marriages. But I'm here to talk about the so called alpha males on. nairaland.

First of all my definition of marriage is simple.
the legally or formally recognized union of two people as partners. The partners have to promise to love, each other, stay together in good and bad days.

Now if u ask a nairaland Nigerian man what he was in a wife, you will think he's describing a slave. They want a wife they can control, dominate. A woman without an opinion and a housemaid.

In 2022 most women have jobs, some women wake up around 4 sometimes 5, prepare food and bath the children, by 7 food is ready, she sweeps the house and arranges the house. By 8 she takes the children to school and goes to work. Let's say she closes by 6. She rushes to the market, by 7 she is home and done with all her errands. She starts preparing food, bath the children, forces them to do their homework work , ask them to bath and she baths the little baby. By 8 food is ready, everyone eats, she decides to rest for a minute. By 9 she is already tired but has to wash your clothes and the kids clothes, she washes the plates. By 10pm she is done with all the house chores but her office work is still there, she forces herself to do the work. By 11 she is tired and goes to bed
Now this is just an example on what some women go through in day.
Now where is the husband, with a sidechick telling her how his wife doesn't have time for sex, how her body is now shapeless.

No appreciation, no love, nothing. Sometimes the house rent is even being paid by the woman, have worked in an agent office, I Know what am taking about. A woman that will do anything to keep her family including sacrificing her happiness and time. Now you rarely see the so called alpha men praising their wives but it's to come to nairaland. To call caring men simps and to advice themselves on how they are demi gods and should be treated as one.

Some men you dare not say "honey, please I'm on my period, on your way back from work please go to the market" omo all hell will break loose, he will come to nairaland to his fellow idiots to complain how is wife wants to control him. You dare not say" honey please help go to mama praise and buy pepper, I want to bath our child" he will tell his friends that you now have balls.
Like what type of marriage is that sef. marriage Is supposed to be filled with love and understanding, not a master - slave relationship.
Honestly this is why a lot of women now leave their marriages, and the same men will come to nairaland to complain on how women are now too independent and not like our mothers.

In Nairaland if a woman is too independent- don't marry her.
She is too dependent - don't marry her

Like what do you guys want, I honestly pity the men that are taking their advise because in the real world no woman born from 1997 down will tolerate a man with all these ideologies.

marriages in the real world is more understanding, the country is hard so a lot of couples now share responsibility. like my neighbor now he's the one that bathes and take the children to school, his wife is a trader so by 5 she is already on the road. when she comes back she cooks and they all arrange the house including the man and their elder child because in the morning they are all too busy to even sweep the house. now that's marriage. now this man has a job but his job is a 9-5.

honestly don't let nairaland fool you, some people are very happy with their marriages.
the country is hard so a lot of men are being supported by their wives and the men do appreciate and show love to them in public.

honestly I pity any woman that will marry all these so called nairaland alpha males.

Their own is to come to nairaland to insult and body shame women, while they are poor and miserable.

God knows that I worked hard for everything i have and it pains me that I have to do this because I really do love this guy but my life is important

So yesterday I posted about my problem with my boyfriend. This was what I posted

So have been dating this guy for the past year now. At first I didn't really take the relationship seriously but with time I found him to be a sweet and caring guy
The problem is his financial situation, I don't really mind it but he does.
All his friends are into Yahoo and other fraudulent activities.
They flaunt their wealth in his face all the time. They have gone as far as nicknaming him their house boy, I honestly Wonder why he still keep them as friends.
I try to be supportive, sometime I give him money and advise but it's never enough.
He works hard and he earns about 40k a month.
But because of inflation it's as good as 5k
I try my best to advice him that things will be better. He's even saving money to start a farming business.
But he's not happy
Mind you he's 22
I don't know what else to do, If I tell him to cut off his friends, it will look like I'm trying to control him.
He really wants to go to school, he said he is going to write jamb next year but anytime he's around his friends, he feel sad.

I just feel hard work pays, and I try my best to work hard and support myself but he doesn't feel that way
Please men in the house .... please advise me


Yesterday I decided to take some of ur advise, I decided to talk to him one last time only for him to tell me he's having ritual thoughts. I just kept quiet, Because if he decides to do it, he's not going to use his family because they are the ones going to eat the money, he's going to use me.
Like what the hell, I'm a bit confused tho. On one hand I'm happy he told me, that means he's finally opening up to me, so I have to advice him against it and on the other hand, I'm scared.
I honestly want to dump him. Please am I overreacting

Mature advise only

Thank you everyone.
Honestly I don't know what's up with him, I was the one that brought up the idea of starting a farming business and he said he loved it, I'm still Saving towards it so when he said he wants to open his own farm, I was like great. I love farming and I think it's a profitable business. All of a sudden he is saying he doesn't want to do it again because of what his friends might say, I don't believe in going into criminal activities to survive, If I did I would be dating a Yahoo boy.
I'm tired honestly he doesn't understand that the country is hard, a 22 year old in the UK is struggling to make end meet and u are in Nigeria complaining on why you don't have a car, iPhone and so much more.

I think I will keep on advising him but if he doesn't take my advise before this year runs out...I'm going to dump him.
I want to live my life slowly and without regrets.
Not waking up to meet EFCC at my door.
I see life as an adventure and im still saving up for my farming business. If he doesn't want to do it then okay.
But I'm not going to make him a partner in my business, because that's what he's saying that we should do it together.
He's my boyfriend not husband, I won't even do business with my husband.
I don't mix business with pleasure

plantainbender:
I was going to say why is he having a gf & getting an erection at 22 but scratch that.

1. Change your moniker to something better, he should feel better

2. Jeez! He's 22 for crying out loud, what's the hurry?

3. An internet fraudster aka Yahoo boy will tell you anything & mock you just to make you feel bad about your life and make him feel better about his miserable life.

3. He's young, his smartphone shouldn't be for watching porn and whatnots, he should engage himself and learn new things online in his spare time.

4. Las las, it's a phase and he'll be alright.

Thanks,

So have been dating this guy for the past year now. At first I didn't really take the relationship seriously but with time I found him to be a sweet and caring guy
The problem is his financial situation, I don't really mind it but he does.
All his friends are into Yahoo and other fraudulent activities.
They flaunt their wealth in his face all the time. They have gone as far as nicknaming him their house boy, I honestly Wonder why he still keep them as friends.
I try to be supportive, sometime I give him money and advise but it's never enough.
He works hard and he earns about 40k a month.
But because of inflation it's as good as 5k
I try my best to advice him that things will be better. He's even saving money to start a farming business.
But he's not happy
Mind you he's 22
I don't know what else to do, If I tell him to cut off his friends, it will look like I'm trying to control him.
He really wants to go to school, he said he is going to write jamb next year but anytime he's around his friends, he feel sad.

I just feel hard work pays, and I try my best to work hard and support myself but he doesn't feel that way
Please men in the house .... please advise me

I used to be in support of 1 Nigeria.
I thought our different cultures and tradition was one of our many blessings.
I hoped with the right government and marketing we could turn Nigeria to one of the best tourist spot. I felt we could attractive thousands if not millions yearly with our unique diversity. I thought it was the leaders that are bad but the bitter truth is the citizens of a country makes up the government
Nigerians are wicked. Forget this religion bullshit they try to pull, even the devil stays away from Nigeria. Nigerians will see their fellow human dying in the street, cold and alone, they will pass, turning a blind eye but on Sunday u see them in church asking God for mercy and not to forget money. Let's be honest Nigerians don't give a Bleep about God, they are after the blessings that they believe God will give them. An average Nigeria cares more about wealth than humanity.
You will see the fake pastors with thousands of followers deceiving this followers with the promise of wealth, saying that God will give them unexplainable weath while he (the pastor) steals from them.
Nigerians have to be the most hypocritical people on Earth. They are the judges and decided which sin is worst than the other, of course we can tolerate corruption but not petty thiefs, of course we can tolerate tribalism but not gays and of worst we should all tolerate pastors deceiving their members, buying cars and other lavish items but don't u dare say God doesn't exist. What kind of a country is this.
Where people are dying but nobody says anything.
Where everybody is after his or her personal Gain
A country where women are see and inferior and second class citizens
A country where so much pressure is put on the men that they turn to criminals to survive
A country where dirty money is celebrated.
A country were poverty has be weaponized

I can talk all day but I wouldn't
Have already made plans to leave this country.
It's too backwards for me

The last time I posted, I spoke about me falling in love with the guy who disflowered me about 10 months ago, prior to us having sex, we had a very healthy friendship so I ask him to disflower me because I thought it was time to lose my virginity.
We later fall in love but our differences was something I couldn't look past, for one I'm not religious, don't want marriage and tradition life, he on the other hand was the opposite of me, he was religious, wanted marriage and a tradition Christian family.
I thought we wouldn't have a future together so I posted about it on nairaland hoping for some good advice and thinkful I got some.

Firstly I spoke to him we discussed about the religious, he's a very understanding person and as promised not to focus me into religion, he says he understands that not a lot of people love the idea of religion but he loves being aware that no matter what, someone, somewhere has his back, he says it gives he comfort knowing that he's not alone in life.
I'm a very realistic person and he is a idealistic, but I think the religion part is no longer a source of tension.
Secondly we had to talk about me not wanting marriage. He explained that he grew up in a Christian nuclear home, and he always wanted that for this family, he grew up happy and in a non toxic environment, he grew up being close to both of his parents, there was never a quarrel that ended their relationship, his family was always there for him, he explained that wanted that for his kids. A stable home
I on the other hand doesn't want that, I grew up in a very toxic environment and I Know what can happen if a marriage goes wrong.
So we decided that let's just wait and see. That maybe one day we might get married or not. Let's just see what works for us

I'm so happy I'm in this relationship, like I said we are friends before lovers

Note: I just want to thank some people on nairaland for giving me good and reasonable advise, thanks

Now I noticed a lot of people where asking for my age, telling me to repent, some called my boyfriend a simp, for not hitting and running.
Some said he just wanted to continue having sex with me. So called me names Because I choose to lose my virginity. Like Bleep of, it's my body, I choose what happens to it. Some asking me to repent because they don't have the common sense to understand that not everyone wants religion or believes in it.

I really hope it is all you guys internet persona, Because if u guys are really that intolerant of other people choices and Ideology, then we have a big problem in Nigeria.

Thanks for giving me good advice.

The last time I posted, I spoke about me falling in love with the guy who disflowered me about 10 months ago, prior to us having sex, we had a very healthy friendship so I ask him to disflower me because I thought it was time to lose my virginity.
We later fall in love but our differences was something I couldn't look past, for one I'm not religious, don't want marriage and tradition life, he on the other hand was the opposite of me, he was religious, wanted marriage and a tradition Christian family.
I thought we wouldn't have a future together so I posted about it on nairaland hoping for some good advice and thinkful I got some.

Firstly I spoke to him we discussed about the religious, he's a very understanding person and as promised not to focus me into religion, he says he understands that not a lot of people love the idea of religion but he loves being aware that no matter what, someone, somewhere has his back, he says it gives he comfort knowing that he's not alone in life.
I'm a very realistic person and he is a idealistic, but I think the religion part is no longer a source of tension.
Secondly we had to talk about me not wanting marriage. He explained that he grew up in a Christian nuclear home, and he always wanted that for this family, he grew up happy and in a non toxic environment, he grew up being close to both of his parents, there was never a quarrel that ended their relationship, his family was always there for him, he explained that wanted that for his kids. A stable home
I on the other hand doesn't want that, I grew up in a very toxic environment and I Know what can happen if a marriage goes wrong.
So we decided that let's just wait and see. That maybe one day we might get married or not. Let's just see what works for us

I'm so happy I'm in this relationship, like I said we are friends before lovers

Note: I just want to thank some people on nairaland for giving me good and reasonable advise, thanks

Now I noticed a lot of people where asking for my age, telling me to repent, some called my boyfriend a simp, for not hitting and running.
So said he just wanted to continue having sex with me. So called me names Because I choose to lose my virginity. Like Bleep of, it's my body, I choose what happens to it. Some asking me to repent because they don't have the common sense to understand that not everyone wants religion or believes in it.

I really hope it was all you guys internet persona, Because if u guys are really that intolerant of other people choices and Ideology, then we have a big problem in Nigeria.

Thanks for giving me good advice.

DonGtoG1:
Firstly, i will advise you to look well before you leap!.

Secondly, remember you are still a student and i think that's your priority for now. Although that doesn't stop you from planning ahead.

You made mention of you wanting to live isolated life with just you and your adopted children, but he wants a relationship which will certainly change what you want and wish for yourself. With your explanations, you are both reciprocating to each others love, directly or indirectly.

My question is, have both of you given a thought to the possibility of adjusting and be compatible with each other?.

If yes, green light�����.

I think we do, we both have similar ideologies and yes we have our differences but we are both mature to understand that everyone is built differently.
And each person mindset is out of a result of their upbringing, environment and personal struggles. The problem is our future together, I'm not religious and don't want a tradition family but that's what he wants.
I'm confused, I don't know if I should agree to the relationship offer and allow fate take it's course or I should accept that we want different things and move on

Marketgists:
Repent

Ma
I suspect u might be older than me, so u must know that there are people who don't believe in your views or ideology, I am not the religious type. Does that make me a sinner to u, yes but I ask u accept that not everyone live their life religiously.
A lot of nigerians sometimes forget that there are people that don't go around shouting"Christ"
I respect ur religion and views
Respect mine

Hi everyone
So I recently got disflowered, it was my choice and I did it because I'm not really the marriage type, like am not a tradition woman, I'm in uni now but I do work hard for my own money so my choice wasn't money motivated,
My problem is I have started falling for the guy, like mad. Before we did it he told me that he loved but I honestly didn't care, but now have starting to love him for him.
He's nice, Caring and drama free.
I don't know if I should date him.
You rarely see a Nigerian guy that's not a problem.
The reason I'm confused is because I want to live a isolated life, just me and my adopted children but I'm not sure he's down for that.
The times we spent together he's always talking about wanting a family plus he's this religious type. I don't know if I should give the relationship a try. He keeps asking me for a relationship but I don't think it's sex motivated because since we had sex 10 months ago, he hasn't ask for it again plus I was the one who told him to disflower me

Please mature advise only, keep in mind I'm still young, i only recently opened my nairaland account and I did so because I needed advise. Thanks