₦airaland Forum

Waiting

Ighoga898:
am gonna have to pass on dis one.. Cos I bet dat 800% bonus is equivalent to #100 on normal tariff

Very correct!

Just like EMPTY HEN that give 5k on 1k recharge with #40 per min tarrif!!

charming1111:
If you read the 2016 edition of King James Version, the book of Matthew clearly states that, “he who has seen the sky, has seen the ocean”. If you want to confirm this scripture, check your bibles through Google play store.

I’ve been to so many churches; Catholic, Anglican, wooden Pentecostal churches, etc, before I joined Winners’ Chapel in 2007 and surprisingly, my life has never been the same. Although, am a member of the late comers unit (those who come to service 5mins before closing time just to share the grace), there are so many things worthy of note in Living Faith Church (LFC) aka Winners’ Chapel.

1.There is a deadline for your prosperity: If you are a first timer in LFC, you must hear the resident pastor saying “if your life doesn’t change after 3 months of joining this church, feel free to leave”.........at first, I didn’t believe but after listening to several testimonies of fellow members, I keyed into the prophesy, and my life changed from EDGE to 3G!!!..... I give God all the glory.

2.A true LFC member is a giver: If you are a member of winners’ chapel and your surname is STINGY, it’s either you are a CHINA-PRODUCT or you are a cousin to BUHARI. My bishop, David.O.Oyedepo, has a passion for giving! And as a son of the prophet, I have followed his footsteps for the past 9years and all I can say is that “Life is Good(LG)”

3.Praises/thanksgiving are traits of true winners: I’ve never seen a church that praises God like Winners’ Chapel!!! So many members have received instant healing on a Sunday service, during praises...... Indeed, there is God in Living Faith Church.

4.The announcement before the benediction: Before the benediction is said, there is a very important announcement that is made. The pastor would say “in case you came late after the offering/tithe has been collected, please do not take it home; make sure you drop it before you go; for thou shall not appear before the Lord empty” A member without spiritual insight will think that the pastor is trying to hustle but the truth is that, whether you give or not, God will still bless the church and don’t forget that you are the primary beneficiary of every seed you sow in the house of God.

Conclusively, we serve one God and as Christians we are free to fellowship with any church, but as for me and my household, we have pitched our tenth with Winners’ Chapel Worldwide because God resides there. I’m very sure that in heaven, there must be winners’ street for the winners’ family to reside.
SHALOM!!!

http://infongr.com/2016/07/14/4-reasons-why-you-must-leave-your-church-start-attending-winners-chapel/

Op, with all due respect, I can't find the main purpose of the church (salvation and eternal life) in ur write up!

I respect Baba Oyedepo but the above is one reason for me to stop attending LFC!

Also, last I checked, my widowed neighbour(Sanctuary keeper in LFC) could not afford the fees for her son to be in LFC sec. Sch which was supposed to be missionary school, I don't even want to mention Convenant Uni!!

I think the church need to re-evaluate her purpose and vission!!

STOP PREACHING DENOMINATION, PREACH SALVATION!!!

harrysjones:
SOME KITCHEN TRICKS YOU MIGHT FIND HELPFUL...
°
(1). Mistakenly added too much salt to your food? Just drop in one peeled potato or yam. The potato helps absorb the excess salt.
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(2). Angry over cracked boiling eggs? Add a pinch of salt to keep the shells from cracking.
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(3). Burned a pot of rice? Place a slice of piece of white bread on top of the rice for 5-10 minutes to draw out the burned flavour. Be careful not to scrape the burned pieces off the bottom of the pan when serving the rice.
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(4). To clean iron cook-ware, avoid using detergents. Alternatively, scrub them with salt and a clean dry paper towel.
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(5). When storing empty airtight containers, throw in a pinch of salt to avoid having that damp smell.
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(6). When making gravy (stews) and accidentally burn it, turn your mixture it into a fresh pan and continue. Add a pinch of sugar, doing that takes out the burnt taste. P.S watch the quantity of sugar though.
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(7). Never put citrus fruits (Oranges, Lemons, limes,etc) or tomatoes in the fridge. The low temperatures degrades the aroma and flavor of
these fruits.
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(. Before you chop fresh red peppers, rub a little bit of vegetable oil into your hands and your skin won’t absorb the spiciness.
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(9). If you aren’t sure how fresh your eggs are, place them in about four inches of water. Eggs that stay on the bottom are fresh. If only one end tips up, the egg is less fresh and should be used soon. If it floats, it’s past the fresh stage.
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(10). To banish ants from the kitchen, find out where they are coming in and cover the hole with petroleum jelly (Vaseline). Ants won’t trek through the jelly. If they are coming under a door, draw a line on the floor with chalk. The little bugs also won’t cross a line of chalk.
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(11). Don’t store your bananas in a bunch or in a fruit bowl with other fruits. Separate your bananas and place each in a different location.
Bananas release gases which causes other fruits (including other bananas) to ripen quickly.
Separating them will keep them fresh longer.
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(12). To keep potatoes from budding in the bag, put an apple in with them.
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(13). If you manage to have some leftover wine, cocktail drinks at the end of the evening, freeze it in ice cube trays for easy addition to sauces (white wine works wonders in sauces.)
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(14). After boiling pasta or potatoes, cool the water and use it to water your house plants. The water contains nutrients that your plants will love.
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(15). When defrosting meat from the freezer, pour some vinegar over it. Not only does it tenderize the meat; it will also bring down the freezing temperature of the meat and cause it to thaw quicker.
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(16). Always keep an aloe vera plant in your kitchen. It’s invaluable when you scrape your arm or burn your finger. Just break off a leaf and rub the gel on the injury.
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(17). Too much fat or greese in your stew? Drop in an ice cube. The ice attracts the fat, which you can then scoop out. This works wonders.
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(18). To reuse cooking oil without tasting whatever was cooked in the oil previously, while heating the oil, drop a small piece of fresh ginger. It absorbs any flavors and odors.
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(19). If your milk always goes bad before you can finish it, try adding a pinch of salt to the carton when you first open it. It stays fresh for a few more days.
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(20). If two drinking glasses become stuck together after stacking, it’s not impossible to separate them. Just put ice in the inner glass and dunk the outer glass in warm water. The warm glass will expand and the cold glass will contract, making the glasses separate easily..
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pls dont for get to support my real gee #ADEWUMIOPEYEMI#.. PLS CHECK MY SIGNATURE THANKS # HARRYJONES CC LASTICALA

Ok

Are you Nigerian president?

If not, Pls contact the president and commander in chief of the Federal Republic of Nigeria!
He is experienced in ear defects!!

Pls see a professional and stop this trial and error of eardrops before you worsen the situation!!

Wish you quick recovery In Jesus Name!!!


#saynotoselfmedication#

When did that become NPF/Mopol uniform


What we have there is one of those "defending the defenceless"

CIVIL DEFENCE!!!

I dated a girl some yrs back in Jos. She was beautiful and well decorated by God

But

When she visits my corner, she will cook, eat and then leave all for me to clean!

Today she is above 35 and single!!

Ladies, pls be wise cos men ar looking for PROBLEM SOLVERS NOT PROBLEM CREATORS!!!

rockyh:
A girl once had two guys she was dating simultaneously one is based abroad with a good life n the other an undergraduate who loves n cares about her With the little he has. The guy abroad treats her with disregard yet she still stayed with him cos he disvirgined ha n da have bn dating for abt 8 years her problems started after many years of bn away n back the guy abroad gave her the shock of ha life that it's over. She's now trying to devise a plan to be with the guy she left years ago by asking him to come n flex ha. If you are the guy will you be ready to flex ha for free without asking for sex

Op! Sorry she treated that way!

Pls help take care of her pending when another abroad guy will show!!

Once again, Very sorry she TREATED U THIS WAY!!!

One of the dangers of the new madness in town called EARPIECE!!!

Zealoy:
hello Nlanders pls I need help n if possible suggestions, I had unprotected sex with my girlfriend yesterday n I even went to the extent of releasing inside of her, but the problem is that since den she has refuse to take the post pills I bought for her, am scared of her getting pregnant cus am not yet ready to father a child n d worst is that she told me today that if I leave her that she is going to kill me n kill herself n
she meant every single word she said.

U know what I love abt U?

1. U are not ready to be a father
2. U had unprotected sex with her
3. U went as far as releasing inside her
4. U are AFRAID SHE WILL KILL U!

Pls Sir, start buying baby things now!! Otherwise consult a lawyer to prepare ur will cos the lady U ar messing with IS NOT INTERESTED IN BOY/GIRL FRIEND POO BUT MARRIAGE!!!

Lai Mohammed Masquarade business Advert!!!

Y not? So long as I'm buying rags!!

thowbie7ven:
Bros, have you ever been a victim of "one chance"?...have you ever lost someone/something so precious to thieves/armed robbers?...if you've not, I pray u won't experience one of these scenarios I mentioned...coz the day you'll, that's the day you'll start wishing them "Jungle Justice"....

Tnx bro for ur comments and in response, yes!

8/10/15 is still fresh on my memory cos of the trauma my kids got from those armed bandits who shot at me ryt in my sitting room.

But no! I don't wish no one JJ!!!

doskie:
Nigeria is not ready to grow honestly. What is the meaning of beating a phone thief.

Quite appalling!

The poor steals maggi and get lynched, the rich steals billions of dollars, we sing their praisese!!

kingthreat:
This is Africa where you get humilated for stealing. If you dont like it, go to the nearest embassy. Its like you haven't been a victim of thieves before. Reminds me of a friend who started supporting jungle justice when his passport with US and UK visas was stolen.

I will support jungle justice only when we start metting it out to our politicians who steal billions while our youths go about chanting their praise and killing for them!!

Apelex:
Seconded

But just braze up for impact cux people will quote you.people who don't want Nigeria to grow..

People who prefer to live in the jungle forever.

People who want their children to experience such horrific site .

People who have no humanity...

People who are still barbaric in thinking.

..let us change our ways Nigerians.
The change starts from you and I.

Say no to acts of violence and inhumanity....


Say no

Hahahaha!

U ar a good prophet!! Surprised to see 10 mentions on this thread alone though some are from toddlers who quote their fathers to rant nonsemce!!!

All the people in the pix ought to be jailed especially those subjecting him to all that humiliation cos its not their duty to declare him guilty! Rather they were expected to hand him over to law enforcement agents!!

#saynotojunglejustice#

Quite agreed bro tnx!

Looks like the lady is a profe....!

Seaman EE, sorry for the loss of ur sis! May God grant the entire family the fortitude to bear this great loss!

That is to say the ships ladden with petroluem products that disappeared under the watch of one of Nigerian security arms will soon come out!!

After 90 yrs the ship is still floating, Abeg tell me another lie abi na

Lai Mohammed discover the ship?

Kashamu wants to be in PMB's good book by all means possible!!!

Will our politricians ever learn from this?

Op, I feel lyk slapping that ur guy ryt now!

Bt wait! D problem is dat he bedded ur sis abi? Wat about other random gals u don't know?

Maybe I will advice u to kil dat bi. Ch of a sister(I will become ur sister after dat)

Na who holy pass?

I know I'm sounding insensitive, yea its intentional!!

I know u ar seriously bruised, yes!

But pls
NEVER THROW THE BABY WITH THE BATHING WATER!!

Listen to your sister,

find out why she decided to come clean after four years, she may know more than you think about that spouse of yours

Now to save face, your guy will claim your sis wants to blackmail him with the incident between them. That is not to say ITS NOT HER INTENTION! I don't know!!

Find out if you can manage this two people for the rest of ur life cos their part will continue to cross if the marriage should hold!

Convince yourself that your guy will not relapse(he might cheat again) bt be sure he will never bed ur sister again if you are not convinced....

QUIT THE RELATIONSHIP.

UR sister will always be ur sister no matter what!

He was silly to sleep with your sister just because you stepped out to the market! What if you travel? I'm in d north east for 5months now and my wife is nt panicking haba!!

What happened to self control

Funny memes op!

Great!

Op remain blessed!!

11 Surelly!

Op! Dat last pix, no be orji uzo kalu be dat?

The same kidney wey people dey find up and down??

This guy don make am sharp sharp!!!

Boko haram?

Was that the only reason we voted for APC? Where are the Chibok girls?

Where is the millions of job per year?

Where is the 24hrs electricity fashola harped on?

Why is the dollar still above #1?

Really Nigerian politicians are worse than court jesters!!!


Mod, please move this to jokes section or better still NL thrash bin!