₦airaland Forum

I believe

culf:
you're not broke my friend, you may not have enough now but it will all change soon

Unfortunately I do not know anyone residing in Nigeria. But we are in communication with someone at the moment. Thank you

meetme01:
I wish it was anywhere in the Southwestern state, I'll walk straight into the matter and see it resolved amicably pro bono. I don't know anyone in Abuja that works in their welfare Agency. However, I'd see if any of my colleagues can link me with any in Abuja.

Or do you know where there Welfare Agency is located in Abuja?

Well done. It will end in praise.

I'm assuming because the in-laws wouldn't let her leave with the child. I wasn't there, just know that she went with people to get her child but returned to South Africa without him

BRATISLAVA:
Why?

I think the family is in Abuja. The boys mother is my elder so I can't "interrogate" her, Ive asked her questions and I'm going off of what she's told me. She doesn't have to be 100% honest with me, but if I can connect her with the right people and she is honest with them then that's cool with me. As long as she gets her child back

meetme01:
Which state do the inlaws reside?

Don't involve the lawyer or police again, they will continue to collect her hard earned money.

If you answer the question,I'd guide her properly.

But please, let her tell you the truth and nothing but the truth on how her child was collected from her. I can assure you, she has a case but if the other party mention stuffs that are not known before hand, it will not be easy. Whatever that transpired, either sweet or ugly, did something bad or sent wrong people or anything that you believed hurt the family should be known. She shouldn't hide anything.

Will do, thanks again

BigIyanga:
Good luck and keep us updated

Broke people don't have cash

culf:
It will definitely change by God's grace. What if I want the payback in cash not laughter

Soo true, we pray to God that it may FINALLY be done

Chinny024:
Hoping to see him being reunited with his mum...Every child deserves to be with the biological mother.. The bonding goes a long way...

Thank you for the suggestions

BigIyanga:
Start from home country. File a missing/kidnapped child report. Have your country police and lawyer lodge complaint with Interpol.

Then get an experienced lawyer that is versed in this or an International NGO that can help. Your Interpol case should filed with Naija Police in Abj.. then have your lawyer take the case down to the state involved.
You need solid legal and law enforcement paperwork before moving to Naija. You’re going to spend money to get this done.

I hope it changes! Can only pay you back by making you laugh also

culf:
Though I was joking, you got to pay me for making you to laugh?
Why are you broke friends? its OK though, its a
phase of life, it will all change soon.

Thank oo, we have contacted them

culf:
try googling and calling brekete family. This is what they do and its for free. After speaking with them, then she can come. that will be faster.

I guess it's cause she loved him

BATified2023:
only igbos do that shit

Y marry an Igbo in d first place?

Noted, thanks for the heads up

TheboyGhost:
If they are from my Tribe then you need to sort it amicably....


In my land, issues like this will not be sorted out by force and violence because we are all violent and stubborn out here....

The catch is this...

We are also a lot Emotional about things....

So if you wish to get the kid just try to workout everything amicably and Emotionally ..

Don't move by Aggression....

Move by wisdom and calmness....

100% true, Aunty and my Mother were talking about getting a contact in Nigeria who would somehow steal the child( or take him with police escorts) then put him on a plane back to South Africa on his own. That is what prompted me to write on the forum. I'm sure the neighbor is being subtle when approaching the boy cause she now knows that the family does not want her communicating with him. She already has all his birth certificates, old passport and clinic card. Hopefully God willing, things will fall into place and she will finally get assistance and it will be easy when it comes to getting photographs for passports and all that jazz

jmichael259:
I understand. No matter what, DON'T GET FIRED!
Well, she has to make do with multiple 3-day visits as her job permits. 1)get a clean photograph to process a Nigerian then SA passport for him. 2)apply for visa 3)book travel tickets, driver/guide, security escort.

1)Always carry birth certificate & baby photos. 2)The boy has to be made compliant for smooth travel operation. Police, immigration etc dont play wt trafficking, they'll notice any discomfort.

Meanwhile, try and get the neighbor to make more contacts for her incase the neighbor becomes indisposed. People not related to the family. Talk to Noone again about taking the boy because a secret known by more than one person has become a news broadcast.

Time is money & money is tight these days. The 4-5 times she's been to Nigeria she's spent a lot of resources that ended up not helping in any way whatsoever. So I made a promise to her that before she goes to Nigeria (and possibly come back empty handed AGAIN). It's better to subtlety put her story out there and we can maybe get leads and people that would be able to assist without alarming the family or angering them in any way. Then from there she can travel back to Nigeria with a renewed hope that this time she has a 90%chance of returning with him. She can't travel to Nigeria and break into their home and steal her son

culf:
let her come down and get her. He is her child, she has every access to her child. if they refused get a good loyal or Human right group involved and get your child or alternatively, stylishly moved him out without them knowing, though the official way is better.

I don't know whether you're joking or serious : . I'm as broke as a church mouse

culf:
how much are you going to pay for the laughter?

Eish I'm sorry, I've been reading Nairaland articles for soo many year as a guest. I'm trying to navigate the forum. Slowly getting a hang of things. At first I was focusing on trying to respond to as many responses as possible. But I saw that we were on the same ship :-))

Missionaire:
You're quoting the wrong person.
Your question should be directed to the guy I quoted.
We are saying the same thing.

Thank you, we will also try them

TheMostComplex1:
Which State? Report your matter to National human rights Commission in that state. Google their phone no or let me know the State so that you call them.

NOTE THEIR SERVICE IS FREE

Very true, but somehow with all the necessary paperwork in hand, both countries embassies, Nigerian police and a lawyer, she did not return home with her child

Mindlog:
This is more of a custody issue. The South African High Commission in Nigeria would be involved as the child is also South African by birth through his mother with a South African issued birth certificate.

The birth father of the child is now late, his relatives have no legal basis to have custody of the child when his birth mother is still alive and involved to an extent in the child's life.

Could be, since she has been to Nigeria Embassy twice and been in contact with South African Embassy numerous times, even contacted a lawyer in Nigeria and went there with a man from a neighboring village but she had to leave without her child

BRATISLAVA:
They believe in culture, but the law supercedes these heartless customs.

It's obvious the woman has not legally looked for redress. Unless the people she's meeting at the Nigerian embassy are cultural stooges. Likely men from his tribe.

A very serious problem that really should even exist

BRATISLAVA:
@Kobonaire234

Can you see what the problem always will be?

How can men 100% own the children they didn't even birth ?

These are troublesome and useless cultures. Any foreigner who gets tangled in this sort of culture is in for it should something happen to their Nigerian man partner.

Amen, thank you for the advice

mannyjoe2002:
get a God fearing contact in Nigeria who would link you up with a lawyer.you must use legal means to get your children free and relocate them.may God's grace, goodness and mercy be with you.Amen

We have seriously advised her against doing that. Two wrongs have never made a right, Aunty would be no use to her son if she's behind bars for kidnapping her own son

thesmallgod:
Don't follow this advice. All else you will end up jeopardizing d good chance of getting d kid legally. Kidnapping is a serious crime

We hope that's the case, though the lawyer & Nigerian police that were involved previously did not phase them much

BigIyanga:
Dont follow this advice. Villagers think they havd an upper hand in a case like this until you get law enforcement and lawyers involved.
They dread police and lawyers like Covid19. They’ll run.

Thank you

PeaceJoyLove:
And what is the international convention law Mr Law. Una go just dey write rubbish. If you dont know about it, shut the crap up. Dont confuse the victim asking for help.

We have contacted them, thank you

Xkale1996:
Call brekete family

Yes a relative of mine was coerced into leaving her 9 month old son in Nigeria by her husband & father-in-law, she tried begging her mother-in-law and gripping the baby but the mother-in-law just looked away and told her her plane is leaving and they took the baby. Yes she may have done things differently and taken the baby by total force. I wasn't there, not 100% sure what took place, but whatever it was it doesn't give the sister-in-law or anyone for that matter to withhold the child from her [quote author=Father254 post=118714888][/quote]

Very well said PeaceJoyLove

PeaceJoyLove:
You no well. You are not ok with this your useless and disgusting advice. I am sure you are the kind of people who kidnap children cos they are first sons. I like this case cos I like jailing people like you. Yes...you will say the meaning of witholding a child who is not yours cos of first born.

Mind you...you will refund all the money you have collected. Very useless thing. You need to be beaten.

Yes some things in life are sometimes are grey but some are just black and white. Yes they were married in South Africa and Aunt had submitted all those documents to people attempting to help her over 5 years ago. No she has not lived in Nigeria for 1 year (why would she need to? The child was born in South Africa and has her listed as his birth mother on his South African birth certificate and his passport). The sister-in-law who is withholding the child is the one who has no ground to stand on because if my Aunt had been another kind of woman, she could say the child wasn't her late husband's child, so all this time they're re busy hogging a child who isn't even related to them. But even if the child has no relation to them, he will always have his mother's blood.
No we do not have pictures of him selling water, a neighbor who is in contact with my Aunt is the one who has seen him leaving the house or returning home carrying water plastic bags on his head & she (neighbor) has asked the boy about the Water and he's said he was selling and hadn't gone to school. The father-in-law didn't exactly say they (his wife and daughter) would kill her. But he did say "if she keeps pushing, she would never return to South Africa cause she might end up like her husband (what does that mean when someone is in a foreign land, visit a family they don't know for the second times to fetch a her child after her husband just passed away?) Yes she has proof of sending money and all the correspondence with different people/organizations over the years. She sent money just last week. She's nt going to wait 7 years, 11 years has been long enough

Father254:
Something is missing in the story.
Do you have marriage certificate either court or church marriage?

If they do,go to court but if not the case will be difficult to handle.


Have you been in your husband country for at least one year ? To build relationships with family and contact if you really came for marriage

How do you know the boy is selling pure water any pictures to confirm this ?

Do you still have evidence of sending money to them for child upkeep?

I don't believe the father in-law said that he will do her what he did to his son.

If he is wicked I don't believe he is stupid too to tell you his evil plan if he wanted the child badly than he grown up son you alleged he killed.

There are cases where the man's family takes care of the dead brothers son . If the boy is up to 18 he will decide in court to stay with his father's family or back to South Africa based on relationship.

There's more to this story.

Thank you so much to everyone for the helpful input. We are currently in contact with the organization

skedy1:
Good one!

Use this channel. This man has a way making things happen. He's going to place a call to whoever necessary, live on radio.
Please, try to visit the Brekete family.

Good luck

Thank you

Elidrisy20:
Shebi she know their address? She should just report them to iPod/ESN,Ameotekun,or BH,they will release the boy in no time

Exactly! Why can't she have children or she should. should have had kids with her brother then keep those for herself

Kentrasso:
How anyone can justify this senseless act is beyond me. Xenophobic what?? Irrant nonsense. Stupid tradition. A child belongs to his mom and dad. Relatives should go fin their own families and leave people alone

Eish! And if they were actually using the money to take better care of the child and they were letting mother and son communicate via phone call or video call as they used to before he started talking. And even allowing him to visit his mother in South Africa, maybe my Aunty might be somewhat okay with them living with her son. But as things are she wants him back as in yesterday

fluffybaby:
But the aunty is happy taking upkeep money from the woman shey? You people and your backward , disgusting lifestyle parading as culture. Vultures.