₦airaland Forum

cruzita:






I will quietly go the stream get some clay and mould my ideal man myself

L-O-L




Shey na all these Yoruba, or Indian deity you wan go mould for stream ni

Fabulocity:
Can cook Intelligent Loyal

Are you f**king kidding me??


Which guy go wan cook for you??

herbie27:
Won't you rather build yourself.

Mtcheeeeew!!! Wetin that one con mean??

Who crushing epp??



Crush kor, Candy Crush ni




Well my answer is none of dem cos dem puna go be too wide for me to contain

Freeze?? No be this same Freeze wey Ruggedman talk say he wan arrange beatings for??





If na him, then it just showed that common sense ain't common

mizzbouqui:
Love is a beautiful thing Go and love Abeg

Shey Love Don Baff??

L-O-L





They Won't Listen To Be You Dear. BTW, Who love Epp??





Some Ladies Are Just Better Off Being The Lord Of The Rings

Onahsundaymark:
whenever l'm bored,nairaland has always been handy.

Lol, at your service Bruh

[b]Difference Between Delivery Room And A Labour Room


Americans call it delivery room WHILE Nigerians call it Labour room.


So This Is What Happens In A Delivery Room


Delivery room (Americans)

Mid wife/Nurse: Madam you have to take it easy breath out slowly, open wide (caressing her hair) push easy. U can do this, come on? your husband is here,

Husband: You can do this honey Look at me. U can do this, breath slow. I love u babe! Woman pushes out (successfully)



So This Is What Happens In A Labor Room


Labour room (Nigerians)

Mid wife/ Nurse: Madam biko push, no waste our time, plenty women dey way ready to born...( slaps woman legs pkaaa), when you dey do am, e dey sweet you o. We no follow u enjoy am ooo. Abeg madam push make I dey commot here joor. See your husband self dey wait for you.

Husband: Nwanyi ogini? No be u don born 5 children before?? Why u come dey do like say u just start and if you born girl again. No bother come that house.


And when the woman put to bed, the 1st thing u hear is, ehya d baby resemble him papa ehhh



Nigerians No Dey Carry Last[/b]



cc: lalasticlala, seun, mynd44, Fynestboi, Dominique

Yampotatocarrot:
Loooooooool, u no well
Make I call your mama, tell am

L-O-L



Go ahead Bro. You can call her and tell her

Thebachelor:
There's a term for that in Economics; the multiplier effect.

Can you humour me please sir/ma??

Countrygirl:
What is this one saying?

Relax dear cos all I'm trying to say is that I think I like you

A guy sent Recharge Card of N1500 to the girlfriend and the girlfriend forwarded the card to her boyfriend without recharging it, the boyfriend loaded the card and transferred N1000 to his girlfriend, and the girlfriend transferred N500 to her boyfriend and the boyfriend transferred N200 to his girlfriend and the girlfriend transferred N100 to her boyfriend and the boyfriend transferred N50 naira to his girlfriend.


Go On...........

Guys please wish me good luck as I'm helping my mum in finding her 5k I took yesterday

Countrygirl:
Nice one OP!
That no:1 is like a pest, am just hapi my next door neighbour has graduated cos she is a perfect example of number 1.

The perfect example you can relate her with in her face



Girls And Backbiting Are Like

lolaluv1:
.
It's just bad what you wrote about the poor lady. she has already gone through alot. You guys don't need to call her names or shame her. Life is more than all this....

It's not bad cos you suppose know say na Nigeria we dey now and the Nigeria blood dey run in our veins so all this one wey we dey yarn na norms




BTW, I think I like you

lolaluv1:
Whether it is or not, is non of your damn business.

[s[The world would be a better place if people like you kept their enquiring noses out of sniffing people's asses.[/s]

Mama PO, Abeg make una no vex ooo




Na just curiosity dey do me. And I would like it if you can take back those texts you just posted. Me no dey poke nose for your matter or someone cannot play with you again

lolaluv1:
And so what?
Isn't an engine meant to be lubricated and serviced.

L-O-L



Attagirl!! Hope your own engine is serviced and lubricated well enough and efficiently??

All I Can Say Is That She Just Won Herself Another Nigga That Will Be Lubricating And Servicing Her Engine Henceforth





And All These Black Skin Guys No Dey Get Joy For Bed At All

niggi4life:
She didnt just start, it's obvious she has been cheating on her hubby before the guy too ported.
A woman with party freak mentality can not stop seeing other men.
The Ex husband no loose at all, at least im own cheating give am better pikin, the reward of hers will definitely be fck and troway

Bad Belle

One Word . . .

Who She Epp??




She Don Baff??




Who She Serve??

MadCow1:
Meanwhile in UNIBEN dem for don tear shirt, pour each other palm oil and gutter water like say them dey initiate them into witchcraft.
Do not attend UNIBEN and call yourself a graduate cos you are not.

MadCow1 And Hatred For UNIBEN Be Like

Congratulations, Bruh




Now The Struggling Continues

OK

Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work, Work!!!

That was how a lecturer was dragging a babe have been chyking since our first year and after she don gree for our second year, the f**king lecturer con dey tell me make I offload the babe for him. I just simply told him Mtcheeeeeeew!!! Kolewerk!!!




May God Punish Some These Nigerian Lecturers

The IQ Testing Lecturers: These set of lecturers will come to be class and will write a long question on the board like:




A guy sent Recharge Card of N1500 to the girlfriend and the girlfriend forwarded the card to her boyfriend without recharging it, the boyfriend loaded the card and transferred N1000 to his girlfriend, and the girlfriend transferred N500 to her boyfriend and the boyfriend transferred N200 to his girlfriend and the girlfriend transferred N100 to her boyfriend and the boyfriend transferred N50 naira to his girlfriend.
Go On...........




Funny, Ain't it??

O

policy12:
And all the girls treating men like ATM ur time too is coming like a thief in the night.
If you don't want man to see as sex object dress decently:
Stop making unnecessary demand from ur man:
Stop seeing a man as ur burden carrier:

If a lady can gladly collect money from me, then I guess it's natural that I chop her kpomo too as per say all things being equal




Na True Talk You Yarn Bro!! You deserve a bottle of cold Orijin for such a wonderful comment

Serves His Lazy Ass Right





As A Player, You Must Be Wise Enough Not To Get Caught So I Guess The Man Ain't Wise After all