₦airaland Forum

ChurchillStorm:
I put it to you that you have maasturbated up to two times this week. Don't bother quoting me to rebuff my statement.

LOL apparently you know me better than myself....
it's been more than a year now....And I thank God for saving me.
Btw I have someone I can always do things with if I have the urge,
so why should I chase shadows.

.



just in case

Thats the price you pay for wanting to sleep with her I guess.....
Cuz if you don't really want anything from her. "No I can't take you shopping is a very simple answer"
but since you want a bite of that cake,
be ready to pay for the ingredients
don't complain

I thank God for Saving guys from that guise called Mbation......
But I'll rather degrade maself and pay for the real thing than self service.

How can I see cake and start eating icing

weitn bring me come hia sef

n

A woman went to a Wal-Mart service counter and told the clerk she wanted
a refund for the toaster she bought because it won't work.
The clerk told her that he can't give her a refund because she bought it on special.
Suddenly, the woman threw her arms up in the air and started screaming,

'PINCH MY N*pple$, PINCH MY N*pple$, PINCH MY N*pple$!!!!!!'

The befuddled clerk ran away to get the store manager In front of a growing crowd of customers.
The manager comes to the woman and asks,'Ma'am what's wrong?'
She explains the problem with the toaster, and he also tells her
that he can't give her a refund because she bought it on special.
Once again, the woman throws her arms up in the air and screams,

'PINCH MY N*pple$, PINCH MY N*pple$, PINCH MY N*pple$!!!'
Which begins to draw an even bigger crowd!
In shock, the store manager pleads, 'Ma'am, why are you saying that?'
In a huff, the woman says,
'BECAUSE, I LIKE TO HAVE MY N*PPLE$ PINCHED WHEN I'M BEING SCREWED!!'

The crowd broke into applause and her money was quickly refunded!!

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says,
'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'
I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'
She responded to my puzzled look by saying,
'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her.
We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store.
I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits.
She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all.
She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'
We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.

Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.
I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.
I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier.'

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out,
'No honey, I don't feel like it.'
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'
I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,
'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that b*tch knows I'm smarter than her.

OP please summarize...
and Kindly use paragraphs.
thanx

Simple!
I have this trick I use,
Picture the person paralysed/disabled or in a very bad state
Check the reaction within your soul
would you still have the same feelings you have at moment...
If your answer is anything less than yes.

I can safely say,
You're not in Love.

wait I thought they both the same thing

hmmmmmm

OP, ''I've'' not ''Have''...
thank me later.

haba nah,wetin she do una
btw english hard o......chai

I approve this Post.....
where are those Mods again??
Fp please

Nairalanders don suffer
Kai

I won't be surprised if this makes FP
btw op,your story sounds too fictitious

women shaaa

thank God for you

gjvk

If you had sai M.I and Kendrick atleast I for gree
Look at the nose difference and head size

with the way I'm commenting on threads these days,
one will think I have no wedding to cover @ 150k with a complementary photobook
video not included.

Blackfire:
my short deeper life uncle prayed and got a shorter sister as will of god,he refused and married a tall fair lady...u want to know what happened?

Yes what happened....