₦airaland Forum

Good morning house. I need your opinion on this issue.

Around May last year, my husband and I went with my 4 year old daughter to visit my sister in-law (hubby's elder sister). They insisted they wanted her to stay some days with them, that I should return for her in two or three days time.

After much persuasion from my oga, I left her. But my heart wasn't settled because I've never stayed away from her for that long.
I just noticed that when we called her on video call the very next morning, she looked and sounded depressed, telling us to come take her home. I just thought she was missing me.

I returned the next three days to pick her up. It was even the oldest cousin, a 15 year old girl, who was actually very fond of my daughter that helped me carry her on her back and saw us off to the bustop.

Two or 3 months later, at the end of a Bible study I had with her, my baby said she wanted to tell me something. Hubby was lying on the couch. My baby said the period I took her to that house, the 15 year old girl was always sucking her vagina. My brain shut down immediately. Her dad jumped from the couch and told her to repeat what she just said. She did. She also said that the girl usually holds her mouth close during the act, and that she beats the girl on the head to stop what she was doing, but the girl refused and beat my daughter back.

I broke down. Hubby had never become so mad at his family to the extent of turning his back on them, to the extent of shutting his dad up, but he did all these because his only child was involved.

The family, they all said my daughter was lying. My question is: can a four year old lie about such? The nature of this supposed lie. I don't think so. But all the family members said my daughter lied. And even the girl denied it.
They are totally refusing to address this. They even after some weeks have codedly believe such happened and have called my husband to beg, hubby said so, I don't know if it's true or not. But me the wife, NOBODY, I REPEAT, NOBODY CALLED ME. Like I am nothing in their eyes. Not even the evil mother that insisted my daughter spent some days with them. It's not like if they called me to apologize it would change the past, no, but I might have some tiny relief.

My daughter talks about that experience till date. Even up till yesterday. I am beyond heartbroken. I can't forgive.

The family all turned their face away. Nobody cared to address it, even his parents. I'm thinking of going to their church to expose her because I hear the 15 year old girl is getting baptized next week. Hubby told me to forget about it, his brother told me not to try it. But anytime my daughter remembers this incident and brings it up, I become very disturbed. I don't know what to do.

Please advise me.

UnusualEmissary:
Madam! Madam!! Madam!!!

You are a grown woman and a married one for that matter. You should only relate with men in matters that are important and under defined conditions and proper manners.

There should be nothing special. Your husband should be enough for you and if you want to have more friends, they should be female. Keep other men at a distance lest you become victims of wolves waiting to devour you and destroy your marriage and life.

Why should you even be bothered that a man stopped talking or playing with you? What's the purpose of the talking and playing?

For your own good, be careful around men. Be careful around men!

God help you.

thanks daddy

Hahahahaha, hello people, thanks for the comments, I get you all. Truth is I no longer work at that place. But I came across Mr B yesterday on the street, he didn't even act like he knew me, just walked pass. The hatred is just too much. Seriously I'm kind of outgoing, vivacious and funny person, I can't help but say some people actually love being my friend, both male and female, because I talk and laugh alot ���my bad. I'm not attention seeking, just that we all worked in the same department so I found it quite difficult to relate with dem after that incident. But me and Mr A, we're good. He's not that kind of person that would encroach into someone's marriage. Not every man thinks that way.
But at my new workplace, I try not to make male friends. To avoid such from repeating itself. Thank you all, most of you cracked me up.

Hello uncles and aunties. Please I need your opinion on this issue.
First of all, I'm a married woman. Where I work presently, I have two colleagues i relate the most with. Mr A and Mr B. Both single. These two men are quite close, they go to bars at night to drink. I'm actually closer to Mr A than Mr B because he's facing some serious life challenges and has stepped in to help settle some issues I had with my hubby. Hubby even knows Mr A. Mr B is always complaining about my close rapport with Mr A, always asking Mr A if he wants to marry me. Mr B at one of our discussions told me that I'm attractive and someone would like to profess their love for me but would hesitate because not only was I married, I'm a strict, principled character. I can't help being that way. He likes dancing in front of me so much that I find it funny lol.
We were having a discussion one-day at work about the best sex education to give youngsters. I was on the side of abstinence but Mr B was insisting on teaching youngsters to use contraceptives. Mr A remained neutral. I never condemned anyone's opinion and I'm entitled to mine also. Mr B got so angry and walked out on us. Since that day he has been keeping serious malice with me. It would have been ok if he did it with only me. But he also extended it to Mr A. Innocent Mr A oooo.
Mr A and I kept wondering what exactly we did to offend him but no response. I kept asking him, but he said nothing. After like a month, he resumed talking to Mr A, but he dey bone me till date. Almost 6 months now.
My question is: what reason can make a guy just bone a lady like that, because I still try to replay the events but it doesn't still make any sense to me.

Hello house, I need a very clean Nigeria used car for sale. State Price and specifications. Preferably AUTOMATIC. Thanks.

Please i need a safe link to download beauty and the beast walt Disney cartoon, for my daughter. I CAN'T FIND IT ON YOUTUBE. Please help.

What could he mean when he says he wants to gun you down? You asked if he wanted to kill you, but he says no, he just will gun you down. What could he mean?

Please guys in the house, when a guy tells a girl he wants to gun her down, what does it mean? She asks him if he wants to kill her, he said no, that he just wants to gun her down. I don't know if its a slang or literally. What could he mean?

Iceberg3:
Oh dear,I nolonger work there,I work @ sea now

Just try and go there and ask to see the human resources manager.

okay

Iceberg3:
@ msjackson,I saw you sent me a mail.. sorry,I can nolonger access my email.
Do have a great weekend.

okay. I wanted to go to that address u mentioned, at ogba. Krones I think. I thought I could meet you there, don't know.

SMJay:
ignore him. Keep pushing try online lesson ulesson is one

alryt thanks

Theaffiliatehub:
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ifeanyi

okay sir

edoman2016:
Because I am a graduate of OAU 2011. I was very sure a chemical engineering graduate from OAU can not be so bad to settle for 20k teaching job after 11 years of graduation. OAU is a top university in Nigeria with good products.

Next time, choose the University name to lie with carefully.

are you for real?

edoman2016:
Then your story is fake. Were you not the one that said you were a graduate from OAU before you got married. Liar.
Happy sunday to you all. I have a problem. There is this young man i just met 2yrs ago. I'm yoruba, he's delta by tribe. We've been just platonic friends but now he wants my hand in marriage. I am a graduate of OAU but he only stopped sch at sec sch.

what is ur aim of doing this pls?

edoman2016:
Then your story is fake. Were you not the one that said you were a graduate from OAU before you got married. Liar.
Happy sunday to you all. I have a problem. There is this young man i just met 2yrs ago. I'm yoruba, he's delta by tribe. We've been just platonic friends but now he wants my hand in marriage. I am a graduate of OAU but he only stopped sch at sec sch.

I lied, was trying to hide my identity on that post because my husband is a nairalander. Scared of his finding out.

edoman2016:
I doubt you are a graduate of chemical engineering from OAU ife. OAU is a prestigious university in Nigeria and it shouldn't have been so bad for you to get a good job 11 years after graduation rather than 20k teaching job.

I never said i graduated from OAU

paulGrundy:
Do you base in Lagos?

No but my hubby drives to the island to work every morning, just in case u have any opportunity for me

I appreciate you all, plus those that yabbed me lol. Ur advice and encouragement meant a whole lot to me. I honestly feel abit better now. Will try my hands on new things.

opabs1:
Very touching story. Too bad you had to settle for a low paying job for 11 years after graduation. Well, you need to work on your mindset seriously now. You deserve better. I can teach you how to earn from the comfort of your home, all you need is your mobile phone and Internet. You don't even need to have a computer. It is legitimate and not a ponzi. Private Message me.

Dem no gree me to pm you oooo, nairaland said av sent too much anonymous mails, will try again later thanks

Uranium222:
Send a message to my email for job placement

I don't know how this email thing works on Nairaland. I tried sending it but don't know if it'll deliver. But my email address is blessojohn1818@gmail.com.

Cutehector:
Zero emotional intelligence

U want me to cry abi

Uranium222:
contact me for a job in Benin city zero, nine, one, 2.8.8. 1.3.8. 3.6

thanks but I am not based in Benin City but in Ogun state. Thanks for the offer

Advision:
exactly ....teaching in a school that sounds almost like it operates from a 3-bedroom apartment 11 good years after graduating is bad.

He should be glad he was fired, God is telling him, he has denied his greater destiny for too long.

I doubt he earns up to 60k a month
there

20k. Me sef done see say I messed up badly. No yab me join pls

firstbornson:
Chemical Engineering? Haaa!

Apparently, "nice girls" do exist too, not only "nice guys".

Stop trying to please people. Stop trying to keep the peace. Don't be quiet just so that the matter will die off or so there will be peace.

Don't play the "mature" person. Speak your mind.

DON'T BE NICE. It doesn't make people like you. Instead, it's irritating. Stop being perfect. Be human!

Stop accommodating.

You have a major psychological issue to work on.

Even if you get a big job in an Engineering firm today, 6 months to come, you'll still go home depressed and sad because your predator colleagues will still prey on your innocence and niceness.

BTW, you were not teaching to "Hold body" You were only uncertain of the future if you stopped teaching.

The worst has happened anyway. Don't rush to another teaching job. Learn a skill. Do something scary and intimidating. Have faith.

This advice is to me because I'm like you.... Working on myself anyway.

I realized that being nice doesn't end well most times. It actually cheapens ur worth in people's eyes. How ironic. Not supposed to be.

bsalawu:
Where’s your location? If Lagos what part?

Sango Ota side oooo. Anything for me?

godfrey02:
you are a woman I guess. go start up a trade and treat your customers well. if hobby have money tell him to open a biz for you. provision, look for a market, sell something and leave those schools alone. by the way school in a flat, how many student them get? and which state is that?

Located at Ogun State

HornyTave:
are You in Benin? hit me up on hornytave@gmail.com if you're interested in farming.

I no dey Benin oooo, I'm at Ogun State. I really appreciate the offer

Peaceagain:
First and foremost, you don't need that job. You should be happy because moments like these ones you have had only push you to destiny. God is trying to tell you that your destiny is big. Don't settle for less. And you don't have to bend over and let people f*** you in the back. You deserve respect and you should demand it from whomever, whenever. Cry today if you must, but go out there tomorrow and tell the world you are not one to be messed with.

You need to see me smiling sheepishly. Honestly the comments here are making me feel hopeful. Love you all �

MadamExcellency:
Do worry, I was sacked or resigned four times, all from multinational companies but at the end I landed as a manager in oil company.

You have been much longer than necessary in that demeaning rather comfort zone of yours and nature wants to elevate you to where you belong.

It's not the end, it's the beginning of better things.

Hello my future Madam, I hail ooo. Thanks for the uplifting words. As an oil company manager, God is telling me you can employ me �