Stats: 3,165,419 members, 7,861,179 topics. Date: Saturday, 15 June 2024 at 06:00 AM |
Nairaland Forum / Ochason's Profile / Ochason's Posts
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Too much weed. 18 Likes 1 Share |
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Since the act was only between both of you, then just act normal if they confront u deny it and act as if ur just hearing it for the first time. If u accept that you did u will loose everything that you have worked for and the Truma of it will disturb for years. 29 Likes 3 Shares |
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My answer is 3: B. My acct. Num ber. 2107648228.uba 1 Like |
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Don't worry my brother university life go open ur eyes by second semester. |
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I have sim cards for sell and they are all registered with NIN. Contact me if ur interested. |
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Hi, My story is an embarrassing one but also deeply emotional for me. Its about falling in love with the wrong person and not knowing what to do about it. Please do not judge me. I was weak and caught up in a messy and toxic marriage. I wish I could turn back the hand of time, I wish I never went to stay with my sister and her family. I wish I was never born…I wish for a much easier life to make a much easier decision but right now, my life is so complicated and I don’t see any easy options for me to make an easy decision. I pray God to forgive me my sins and I pray you that is reading will help me with some advice. Two years ago, after I had finished my university and was looking for a job without success, my elder sister who lives in South Africa invited me to come to SA to find opportunities. She was able to find me a job as waiter which was supposed to be a temporary job until I found a better one. Living with my sister exposed who my sister really was. My sister was a terrible person I never knew. She is married to a pastor, known by everyone to be a very strict and religious minister. But beneath the public display of a perfect Christian family, their marriage was a disaster. My sister was abusing the husband. She called him names, treated him with disgust even in front of the children.As a result, the children have no respect for their dad. They never respond when he talks to them and they see him as a weak man. They are always playing video games when they are at home from boarding school. They are so spoilt and can do no house work or show any respect for elders. You can imagine my shock at the way my sister was treating her husband. I asked her why all these and she told me to mind my business, that its a married peoples’ matter that does not concern me. I felt so ashamed of my sister and so sorry for her husband. I was afraid of reporting back home what was going on cos my sister warned me sternly to mind my business. I quit my job as a waiter because I found out the pay was not worth the work and stress involved. I convinced my sister to employ me as the house chef because the chef they had was not doing any better than me. She agreed and paid me. I was both chef and house manager. My sister was happy cos I cooked all the home meals she missed in Nigeria. My sister works in one of the big banks in SA and she is quite wealthy. Most times, she is hardly home and anytime she was around, it was always fighting with her miserable husband. One day, I could not hold it anymore. The man was in his study and heard him crying. I knocked and asked him if I could come in. He was ashamed I had seen him crying. I asked him what was really going on? Why is he allowing my sister treat him like this? He said he does not know what happened but its majorly because my sister has so much money and power and does regard him as a poor pastor. That my sister knows that he is against divorce and as such, treats him with such disregard. He said they do not even sleep together for the last two and a half years. So ashamed, I apologized for my sister and told him he is a good man but he does not need to hide in a bad and abusive marriage under being a pastor. He said he is praying for God to change his wife. Being at home as their house chef, we began to get closer and he saw me as a friendly face in the house away from his trouble. I was in my room one day when he knocked on my door, I allowed him in cos I thought he needed something and he looked at me with such fear and weirdness. I asked him what happened and he said : I don’t know but I need your help. I said how can I help, he said: can I kiss you please. I am running crazy. I cannot cheat on my wife cos I am a pastor but I am tired of masturbating that I feel like committing suicide right now. What I saw in his eyes was a man that was not playing about committing suicide. He seemed like he was so scared and was about to end it once and for all. I told him its ok. He can kiss me. I just wanted him to calm down. I hugged him and he began to cry and shaking so hard. It was like the weight of the world was upon him. After he cried a bit, he said, I am so sorry…I am so weak but please bear with me. I told him its alright and then he kissed me. I didn’t stop him cos I thought that was what he needed. He kissed me so good that I knew this was a road of no return. But surprisingly, he stopped and got up and thanked me for being there for him. That was how, I started allowing him to kiss me. I began to long for his kisses. He was such a good kisser and he always stopped when we were both getting carried away. Until I couldn’t help it anymore. I told him not to stop and he asked me if I was sure. I told him yes. I was in love with him. I wanted him so bad and he felt the same way. And we made love and continued to make love to each other anytime we could behind my sister’s back. He began to be happy again. We knew it was wrong but it felt so right at the same time. I also thought I was helping their marriage, at least, he was no longer miserable and suicidal. We even likened our situation to the bible when Jacob worked to marry two sisters (Rachael and Leah). I mean, if it was a sin, why did God allow that? My sister’s husband was happy and he began to do well in everything. My sister even noticed that the man didn’t care about her and her abuse anymore. She tried to be nice to him but her bad behavior didn’t take long to show up again. And so, my relationship with the husband continued until I got pregnant. I was so scared but when I told him, he was so happy. He said he would get me an apartment to move in and he would take care of me and the baby. I told him no. My parents and my sister would never forgive me. Having an affair is one thing but having a child for my sister’s husband is another. But he has been begging me. Telling me that this child was conceived in love. That the child would seal our love which he will remember and keep him happy for the rest of his life. He wants me to have this child and tell my family that I was impregnated by a random boyfriend who is denying the pregnancy but I want to keep the child. He says my family will be upset but in the end, its my decision to keep the child and they will eventually accept. Because of religious belief that abortion is a sin. But they will never know the child is for my sister’s husband. That plan feels so exciting to him but I am worried. I know abortion is a sin but can God not make an exception in this case? will he not be more angry that I had a child for a married man? He is ready to marry me because he said polygamy is allowed in the bible but even if he marries me ,it will be in secret cos if my sister finds out, there will be world war. I pray God to forgive me. I have been praying for answers to my prayers. What do I do? Please advise me. Thank you. 1 Like 2 Shares |
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My name is Jolade (not real name). I am 26years old , just finished my HND, awaiting service cos my school had some issues and so we are delayed. I decided to get a job in the town. My friend told me a new restaurant was opening around August last year and so I applied. I got a job as sales. The IT manager was transferred from the restaurants head office in Lagos. Lets call him Vincent. Vincent is a very handsome guy. Every girl had their eyes on him. He was also very intelligent and friendly. I usually just say hi to him, that is all. After some weeks, he called me to say he has been watching me. That he sees that I am a decent girl and he would like for us to be friends. I wondered why me of all the girls in the office? He just said something about me is different. Dating Vincent was a secret because of office policy. But it was a very nice relationship.. He genuinely cared about me, always checking on me…asking me if I was ok…I tried to fix my off days with his own duty off days . We spent alot of our free time together. He was very surprised I was a virgin. Vincent spoke to me about my future, he seemed very interested in my welfare. He talked about his future plans with me and I was really happy to be in love with such a smart kind and ambitious man. I felt God had answered my prayers. All was well until towards end of December last year. Vincent all of a sudden started giving me attitude…and before I could figure out what happened, he sent me a message that we should break up with each other. I was not myself…what did I do? I kept asking him,he said nothing at first but he later confessed. He said he does not want to pressure me but that he had s*x with someone else. That he feels bad for cheating on me cos he knows I want to keep myself. So, he felt it was best to break up with me. I cried and cried cos I thought I could not live without him,….I called in sick for several days cos I was an emotional wreck for days. One night, I took matters into my hands. I went to his place and begged him to give me a chance. I was ready to give him my virginity. He deserves it…he has been a great guy to me and I am helplessly in love. I told him he can have me cos I cannot bear to loose him over my virginity. Vincent made love to me. A very painful experience but I guess that is how first time is for some girls. I was happy again. Things were going to be like before with Vincent. But alas, something else happened. I started getting into trouble with our manager in the office. This woman started picking on me for flimsy reasons. She insulted and humiliated me at every opportunity. I shared my concern with Vincent. He promised to talk to her. I wanted to move in with Vincent during the December period but he said his brother would be coming to visit him from Lagos. So I decided to surprise him with food on Saturday after new year. I made fried rice and chicken.When I got to his place, I noticed his windows were opened but door was locked. So, I went in through the back door,from the Kitchen. I dropped the food in the Kitchen and went to the bedroom. That was when I saw Vincent and my manager having s*x. I ran out…heartbroken and betrayed. I could not believe I was naïve to give myself to someone who was playing me. Now, I understood why the manager was always picking on me. And the worse is this manager is married with children. Vincent has been begging me to hear him out. That he is only sleeping with her to get something from her. A car. She promised to promote him and give him a car if he slept with her. He showed me their chats….its just s*x cos her husband is not satisfying her. He said its just temporary…that he wants me to be his wife… Getting to work two days later, I was fired. I knew this manager was only trying to silence me. I was so angry, sad and upset. Vincent asked me to calm down that he will help me look for another job. This woman took my man and my job away. I want nothing but to revenge her. I want to expose her to her husband and on social media but Vincent is begging me that he may loose his job if I do anything stupid. Now, I have been mocked and betrayed and abandoned…why should I care if Vincent is fired? I am sure he is still sleeping with her cos she has not given him the car right? Even though I love Vincent…I think the only way for him to show me he loves me is to leave that woman and even resign from that job to be with me or he is lying to me and I will expose both of them, their affair. I will even write to our head office that Vincent took advantage of me, lied to me and caused me to loose my job because of his affair with the manager. My reason for writing you ma: please help me share my story. I want to know what people think is the best way to deal with this matter. Do you think Vincent is telling the truth? Will he be with me after he gets the car? I know he cant marry her cos she is already married…should I be patient and see what Vincent will do after he gets the car or should I go ahead and expose them the way I want to? Please advise me. I was fired unjustly and on top of that…she is stealing my man when she is supposed to be happily married…I cant just sit back and do nothing…. |
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Oktane:please sir can you tell me about egg distribution business. I have been trying to get into that business but I have little knowledge of it. I will be glade if you could reply me and give me the link also of the thread you mentioned here( BLACKY) thanks as I get a response from you. |
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A friend needs your advise. My wife and I are having issues for over six months now. We live in the same house but she does not sleep with me or barely speak with me. And that is because she found out my indiscretion in March. I have been married for four years now. We were both virgins when we married. So, she is my first and I hers. Along the line, I got tired of having s*x the missionary style and wanted to try new things to spice up our life. That was when my wife shocked me and refused to try other s*x styles like doggy or oral s*x. I was very disappointed but I love my wife, so I did not bother her. She say doggy style is painful for her and oral is against her beliefs. But,as a man, I desire these kind of exciting ways of making love and I watch films and I really get aroused seeing other people do it. One day, I gave two ladies from my office lift after work. I noticed one of them was trying to be close to me…I used to give both of them lift. Then, one day, only one of them waited for me cos she could not find transport. We closed late that day and on the way, we got talking and it was getting interesting. I asked her if she was in a relationship, she said she just broke up with her guy. She wanted to know why I asked her and I said nothing just curios. However, she went further to say that she likes me and she wish I was not married. I smiled but then she also went ahead and said she miss her s*x with her boyfriend. All these, I know she was telling me because she wanted me. I told her lets hangout. She agreed. I took her to a hotel, paid the bill. That night …it was wild. All the imaginations I had wanted with my wife..I had with her…she was wild and gave me all the styles. For the first time,I felt I made a mistake marrying my wife. That was how my affair with this lady started…until my wife noticed I was not bothering her again for s*x. She checked my phone and saw messages between me and this lady. She went crazy but I told her she pushed me to it. That her refusing doggy or oral pushed me to cheat. This almost broke us up but after much counselling, we agreed to work things out. My wife agreed for the doggy but not oral. She maintained its still a sin. Even the doggy,she just make me loose interest cos she will be behaving uncomfortable…not enjoying it. I decided not to bother her again. When she noticed I am quiet… she will start making trouble…saying I am selfish and all I want is s*x and I don’t care what she feels. I don’t know what is so strange about a man wanting doggy or oral from his wife. This is one reason a lot of men cheat on their wives. Side chicks are ready to give what the married ones don’t want to give. I feel so bad but since the situation is not getting better, I been thinking maybe its time to end the marriage. There’s nothing I have not tried. I gave her books to reach, videos to watch…even paid for an online coaching class for her to watch but she still maintain her stance. I really do not want to divorce…I cannot bear to see my children go through this but if you were in my shoes, what will you do? This has drawn me and that lady close. I am getting tempted to continue the affair with her…I really do not wish to…but my wife is being inconsiderate and I really feel she does not care about me as much as I care about her. Please advise me…its almost end of year…I cannot continue in a marriage where we hardly speak to each other or enjoy s*x with each other…if she cannot compromise…I will continue cheating cos divorce is not an option… What else can he do? 5 Likes 2 Shares |
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I will share mine first. There was this firm I applied for a job. So when I went for the interview one of the staff I met there we chatted for some minutes so she ask me my tribe I told her she said that she is not sure if I would get the job cos the madam only takes yoruba tribe. When I went in for the interview the first question she asked me was which tribe from I told her. So after the interview she said she will get back to me but 2yrs now yet to hear from them but 3 of the people I went with for the interview were taken cos they are from yoruba. I have had of relationships that has ended cos of tribe issue. Feel free to share your own experience. |
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Sirmwill:Pls come and continue am enjoying this your story |
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Have you ever had this kind of experience in a bus or at a night class either with a stranger or your partner. Share your experience. 1 Share
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Mine was very disappointing. Was going out with this girl for about 7months only to discover that she was busy having sex with a close friend of mine. And she can lie very well even if you catch her redhanded she will still deny it and find an excuse to tell. I had to end everything immediately before someone gives me STD. 2 Likes |
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I met my ex husband at the market while trying to get soup ingredient. He assisted in picking few things and we later exchanged numbers. We started with being friends and I believed he was a nice guy and so I started going to his place, he would also visit me and from there everything went well and we got married after 8 months. Before we got married we had a little Issue. We were at an hotel that day having some time out beside the swimming pool when he proposed to me publicly. I was shocked and so didn’t immediately accept his proposal but rather left him there at the hotel and looked for a quiet place to think about it. After about a month of getting myself, I had to go back to him and apologize of which he accepted me and we then got married. After about 3 months of marriage, my husband changed from the sweet loving man I knew to a woman beater. I was shocked but I endured it hoping he will change but it was obvious he wasn’t planning to change and so I started planning to move out. But after about 6months of marriage I became pregnant and so could not pack out of his house anymore but had to endure the beating even during pregnancy. One night I had to summon courage and asked my husband what my offence was for him to be treating me like trash and he said because I publicly declined his proposal. I was so shocked and thought he was joking but I still apologized once again. He accepted the apology but still moved on with the beatings. One day he beat me so badly that I started bleeding, obviously it was a miscarriage. I couldn’t tell anyone so I flushed my stomach quietly. After I flushed my stomach he begged me for forgiveness and then gave me a shocker by asking me to leave his house that his revenge on me was over. That night he actually came in with another lady and two Lovely kids which he claimed was his and that was his wife. People have been advising me to revenge, while others has been saying I was at fault for trusting him and being so cheap. Please advise me I really want to know if truly I was at fault? Because right now I am on the look out for assassins who can delete him for me. |
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I wanted to post my story for advise and opinions on this matter. My wife and I have been married for 8 years and we really have not had any issues until now. The whole situation started about 5 months ago. I think it was early January. We just launched our second business branch and my wife threw a party for us.I am into real estate and other strings of businesses. Last year was a good year for us. Our business grew and we expanded by opening one more branch office here in Port Harcourt (not real location). My wife,who is our Business development strategist came up with an office opening party so we can invite dignitaries and celebrities to come and even invest more in our businesses. My wife decided to engage her friend that is a top event planner to handle the event. The event was successful no doubt,everything was just glamorous. Then,there was another part of the event that moved to the club that night. We were all having fun. And then,my wife’s friend who planned the earlier event showed up looking really well dressed..more like very s*xy outfit. Of course,lot of people were dressed to kill at the party. In a lit party like this,one should expect some serious drinking and some inappropriate behaviors. It was clear,my wife’s friend was getting a little more than tipsy. She was doing a little too much and my wife was concerned. I tried to call my Driver to come take her home but the foolish guy was drinking somewhere and didnt pick my call. My wife agreed that I escort her friend to go sleep in our SUV until the Driver shows up. I guided her friend to our car and tried to get her inside to sleep but things took a different turn. She was drunk and started to pull me to kiss her. she was rubbing on me and telling me she wants me. I knew it was the alcohol talking but she kept on and on. Begging me to kiss her so she can sleep. No one was looking and I gave her a small kiss just to let her feel she got what she wanted. Of course she wanted more but I didn’t oblige her. I put on the AC for her and pulled the seat back for her to rest. As I walked away,I finally got through the Driver and he came to take her home. I thought that was the last I would hear of what just happened but I was wrong. Two days later,this lady starts to chat me and saying she wants to see me. I thought it was a joke. She said things like she knows I want her too cos I kissed her at the club 2 days ago. She kept confessing her love for me and how she cannot control herself. To be honest,this is not the first time women would throw themselves at me but this is the first time,a friend of my wife would do such a thing. I asked her what if my wife finds out and she replied me with a bomb: she said..she does not care because my wife is also not a saint. What?!!!!..what did she mean by that? I asked her to explain and she said she cannot tell me because she swore never to tell anyone but that my wife has definitely been with someone else but me.At this time,I was getting really worked up. I told her she was bluffing and she said I was being naive. I told her I would ask my wife…she said she would deny but that does not mean its not true. She would deny because she swore to keep my wife’s secret. So,in order to play her game,I told her I would sleep with her if she told me who my wife was cheating with. She agreed. She sent me lots dirty messages and told me to meet her at a hotel that night. And then,I asked her: how do I know you are not trying to set me up and walking into a trap? My wife’s friend then gave details. She said my wife and I were having issues just a few months before our wedding,I said yes!…she said because of the issues…my wife was doubting my loyalty and she went back to her ex and slept with him. And that they were seeing each other even after we got married until like 4 months after marriage. I knew this woman is desperate but this information she just released scattered my brain. I drove straight to see my wife and straight up told her what her friend just told me. My wife began to act shocked and pretend that her friend was lying so I told her, I have recorded conversations (which I really didn’t have)and if she pushed me to release these conversations, it would be over between us. At that point,my wife broke down and started crying. She then confessed to having gone back to her ex when we were having issues weeks before our wedding. But she swore on her children’s’ lives that it did not continue after we got married. However,her ex went to tell her friend that they were seeing each other which was a lie. That her ex wanted her back by all means and was telling lies that I was not treating her well and that she misses her ex and wants to come back but she is stuck in the marriage. All these revelation was too much for me to bear. I told my wife to leave our home but she refused so I took a my things and went to the company guest house where I have been. I have been so angry and betrayed that I do not know what to do. I never planned to be a divorcee. I love my wife. She is very instrumental to the success of my business …but how do we work through this when she has betrayed me like this? And she is insisting the affair ended when we got married….the affair before marriage is hurtful because we were still engaged even at that time but if it continued after…I cannot live like this. How then,do I believe she may be telling the truth? Trust has been thrown out of the window. Our families have been trying to reconcile us but as a man,I have never been so hurt and emotional in all my life. I trusted my wife with all my life. I finally agreed for us to see our Pastor last week to counsel us but it ended up in a disaster. I recognize I was still angry and I was shouting and my wife was crying uncontrollably saying I do not believe her but I believe a woman who is trying to ruin our marriage. Well,if her friend is trying to ruin our marriage…she caused it..she allowed it. We both left distraught and later that night,the friend showed up in my guest house. She told me that she came to beg for me to forgive her friend. But you should have seen what she wore. The most see through outfit and as soon as I allowed her to sit down,she came hard on me. Pushing her away was my first thought. But I felt so angry that I also wanted to revenge my wife and I started responding to her. I was ready to make love to this woman but I stopped and told her to leave. Since then,she has been determined to make me sleep with her. I felt I needed space but the more space I need,the more s*xual temptations are coming my way. And yes,I would be justified if I give in right? After all…my wife did it first? Maybe if I did…I would feel better and maybe be able to forgive her after we are even. I miss my wife but how do I trust her….I feel tempted to sleep with someone else. Its not that hard for men…I do not know how much more I can resist the temptation. How can I be sure that my wife is telling the truth? How do I know the affair ended after our marriage? Will I be able to trust her again? Is there any hope for our marriage? 9 Likes |
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I think BUHARI is better than some people ooh if they are to be made the president. 1 Like |
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Which church do you attend and were is it located. I just love your description of ur church activities during service |
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josue17:brother repent ooohh na your destiny and your generation you dey wast for there ... |
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I miss also my girlfriend chai..... Mbuuari aabegi call off this lockdown cow my body wants to stand-up ooh ![]() ![]() 1 Like |
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As for me I'm miss church and football leagues. You are free to list down what you have miss the most cos of this lockdown..... |
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