₦airaland Forum

A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:

Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
Hand Job: $5.00

Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks to an eager-looking group of men.

"Yes?" she enquires with a knowing smile, "Can I help you?"

"I was wondering", whispers the man, "are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?"

"Yes" she purrs "I am."

The man replies "Well wash your fucking hands, I want a cheese sandwich!"

razo , Money is not everything you can have all the money in the world and be miserable.

Well Seun you have a point. I just think It is time for all Nigerians to wake up and quit following the paddy wagon of the Northerners. They run every thing in Nigeria from day one.

isn't that we all men says when we see boobs? LMAO

Well Explain that to the Northerners. How many presidents has Nigeria had ? How many head of state has Nigerian had ? and of all the numbers, how many came from the North or are Muslim ?

I wish they have those shows on DVD I will wait inline to get copies.

I remeber that show can't remeber the name too. damn you make me feel old GOds are not to blame nice book

yes, you will not believe, I just read that book too.

My fav are Garuba and Chief Eleyimi hope I spell his name right

OKEKE I think is the guy you refering to.

What do you remember about 'Village Headmaster'? Tell all the youngster what your remeber about Village Headmaster.

IBB Because <snip>

there is nothing wrong with hanging out.

Well that vision ws only declare to him. I dont think that is what Nigeria need.

A man walks into a bar, sits down on a bench and orders a cold one. He swigs down the beer, looks in his pocket, cringes and orders another.

He gulps down that one, looks in his pocket again, cringes and orders yet another one. This goes on for at least an hour and a half.

Finally the bartender, bursting with curiousity, says, "I know it's none of my business buddy, but I have to ask. Why the whole "drink, look in pocket, cringe and order another one" routine?"

"Well," slurred the man, "There's a picture of my wife in my pocket.

When she starts to look good, then it's time for me to go home."

A man stops off at a bar after work to have a couple of drinks. He starts talking to this woman, and even though the guy is married, he thinks she is so fine that he agrees to go back to her place.

When he gets to her place, he finds out that she is a prostitute and that she wants $75.

"Forget it," the man says, "you never told me you were a prostitute." "But I do have $10 on me, will you take that?"

"You won't get any decent prostitute for that," the hooker says. She throws the guy out.

Later that night, the man and his wife go out to dinner. While they are eating, the same prostitute who happens to also be eating there recognizes the guy.

She comes up to him and says, "See, I told you." "Look at the kind of trash you'll pick up for $10."

After a really good party a man walks into a bar and orders a drink.

Already drunk and delirious, the man turns to the person sitting next to him and says, "You wanna hear a blonde joke?"

The person replies, "I am 240 pounds, world kickboxing champion and a natural blonde. My friend is 190 pounds, world judo champion and is a natural blonde. And my other friend is 200 pounds, world arm wrestling champion and is also a natural blonde. Do you still want to tell me that blonde joke?"

The man thinks for a while and replies, "Not if I have to explain it three times."

A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy's and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, "I'd like to buy a bra for my wife. What type of bra?" asked the clerk. Type?" inquires the man, "There's more than one type? Look around," said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size, color and material imaginable.

Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only four types of bras to choose from. Relieved, the man asked about the types. The saleslady replied: There are the Catholic, the Salvation Army, the Presbyterian, and the Baptist types. Which one would you prefer?

Now totally befuddled, the man asked about the differences between them. The Saleslady responded, "It is all really quite simple...

The Catholic type supports the masses. The Salvation Army type lifts the fallen, The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright, and The Baptist makes mountains out of mole hills.

Have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes? If you have wondered why, but couldn't figure out what the letters stood for, it is about time you became informed!

(A} Almost Boobs...
{B} Barely there.
{C} Can't Complain!
{D} Dang!
{DD} Double dang!
{E} Enormous!
{F} Fake.
{G} Get a Reduction.
{H} Help me, I've fallen and I can't get up !

Send this to all that will appreciate it!

They forgot the German bra.

I no come work today!!!

Hung Chow calls work and says, " hey, boss i no come work today, I really sick. i got headache, stomach ache and my leg hurt, I no come work."

the boss says, you know Hung Chow, I really need you today. When I feel like that I go tell my wife give me sex. That makes everything better and I go to work. You try that.

Two hours later Hung Chow calls again. Boss I do what you say and I feel great. I be at work soon. You got nice house.

damn greatpeter, easy on that man, he just dont see our point.

nana what does tufia kwa means?

by getting the word out and getting more people to read your journal.

I think her death is a wake up call for all the politicians, tomorrow is not promise to anyone, so treat people with Passion and respect while you are here.

Joftech if you have the means,and you start aging, you will do the same. why are all American politicians going for botox?

Jacumo tell him please. New Orleans got flooded and they believe in Voodoo. How come they can't predict the hurricane Katrina will kill thousand of people and save us the agony .

is it true Donald Duke is messing with all the young girls there?

Wish I can comment on this issue. I am clueless dude.

NANA you and I know, if that was Laura BUSH or TONY Blair's wife, it would have gotten allot more attention than we are getting.
No one cares because she is an African 1st lady, and she is black

The only functional juju that I know is JUJU music

are you Kiding me. SADAM thought he had JUJU when GORGE bush rain 5000 pound bomb on his ass. How come all the JUJU people are not stinking rich, don't let all this people fool you men.

NO WAY ATIKU WHO? he stole too, retired civil servant with all that money, where did he get it.

That is a litlle too personal .