₦airaland Forum

JacksonD7:
Could you please stop advertising this porn movie on nairaland.

He suck hell outta her B***s

miriamchi:
Please can someone help me with how to get a euro account and swift at ecobank Nigeria.?

Just visit any of their branches closer to you na, or send mail to their enquiry at engcontactcentre@ecobank.com I believe this should help. *winks*

ektbear:
Watching season 3 episode 1 now.

What on earth must Tyrion do to earn his father's love? This sh1t makes me sad.

Seun says, "please note that anyone who posts spoilers will be permanently banned from Nairaland.
To discuss the books, please visit this page: https://www.nairaland.com/1548262/questions-theories-trivia-asoiaf-game

i haven see any of the season at @ all

gidimasters:
OK nice for that... Been long I used my ecobank for that...

BTW, how to you fund his account? You change the naira to dollar or you go to the bank with its equivalent in naira?

I have 1 Aboki i changed dollar from (Naira to Dollar), and pay the dollar into his Ecobank account for him to use his foreign currency denominated card in Yankee.

yedidiah:
Certainly not eco bank. They deduct more than they pay so at the end of the month, your balance doesn't go up but down.

Are you sure you do not withdraw more than 3 times a month?. I was told by the Bank officials that Interest can only be paid to me if i did not withdraw more than 3 time in a month.
You can ask them in your Bank for the % of interest paid, am not sure if is fixed of negotiable.

Lagos State Government
Latest Vacant Job Positions
Neighbourhood Safety Corp Member
Closing Date Friday, February 3, 2017
The Board of the Neighbourhood Safety Agency hereby invites application from suitably qualified candidates for enlistment into the Neighbourhood Safety Corps.
Special Requirements:
i. Applicants must be a citizen of Nigeria
ii. Applicant must be certified physically and mentally fit by a Medical Practitioner from a Governmental Health Institution
iii. Applicants must not have previous criminal record(s)
iv. Applicants must not be less than 1.67meters in height for men or 1.63meters in women
v. Applicants must not be less than 86cm (34 inches) expanded chest measurement for men.
vi. Applicants must present 2 verifiable references, one of whom must be either a Traditional Ruler from that locality or a Top Government functionary.
General Requirement:
i. Applicants must not be below 18years or above 40years of age
ii. Applicants must attach photocopy of LASRRA registration card.
iii. Applicant must have a minimum of West African School Certificate or its equivalent with credits in at least five subjects including English Language
iv. Any candidate who submits more than one application will be automatically disqualified
v. NB: the training may be strenuous, therefore, candidates must have not only passion and commitment for the job but also the physical and mental agility that it requires.
Method of Application
Interested Applicants must apply online. Visit - http://jobs.lagosstate.gov.ng
Application Opens, Friday, 27th January,2017 and closes on Friday, 3rd February, 2017.

princessfmo:
[url]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwf4qp2Jz5Y HERE[/url]
They started chanting Phyno's name after they spotted him at their school. Do they really look alike?

That can only happen in the eastern

blazer234:
Defend yourself mr. God gave you hands, legs and brain for a reason

Mr. Accomplice. I don vex

gidimasters:
Who told you Nigeria cards are no longer working?


Use GTBANK, FCMB, ECOBANK

I know Ecobank Naira master card is temporarily not working. My cousin came back in November, and we went to one of their branch to collect Foreign currency denominated card on his domiciliary account.
Since then, I just went to Bank to fund his domiciliary account for him while he collect it over there.

lola024:
Read carefully and follow the instruction dearly.... then thank me later.

So, you're in love with one of your friends, but she has a boyfriend and probably wouldn't have sex with you anyway.

What you will need: 1 x knife, 1 x ring, access to a sunbed, the ability to grow a beard.

Step One: Place the ring on your wedding finger and avoid contact with your friend for a month.

Step Two: Stop shaving and use the sunbed to gain a tan.

Step Three: After a month when your beard is full and your tan is noticeable, remove the ring from your finger.

Step Four: Remove all your clothes and break into your friend's house.

Step Five: Use the knife to cut your body in various places. Avoid the face. If possible, focus on your back. The more blood the better.

Step Six: Enter your friend's bedroom and lie face down on the floor. Wait for her return.

Step Seven: When she enters the room pretend to be unconscious. Allow her to turn you over and try to wake you for a few seconds before you open your eyes. The injuries to your body will serve as a distraction to your unclothedness. She will be more concerned about your wellbeing instead of fearing the naked man in her room.

Step Eight: When she asks you what's happened you should ignore her questions. Instead you must act confused and ask the date. If it's September 15th she will say 'September 15th' to which you must reply 'No, what year is it?'

Step Nine: Upon hearing the year say the words 'It worked.' Pretend to lose consciousness again for a few seconds, implying that whatever it is that has worked took a great effort.

Step Ten: If your friend is a curious person she will probably ask 'What worked?', even if she doesn't ask this question it is important that you now say the words '(Insert Friend's Name), I'm from the future' in your most deadpan voice.

Step Eleven: Pause for ten seconds to allow the incrediblness of the situation to sink in. There will be no reason for her to doubt your claim, because your beard will make you appear many years older and your cuts would add weight to the idea that you've come from a post-apocalyptic future where a war is currently taking place.

Step Twelve: Raise your left hand to your face. All women are very observant, so your friend will immediately notice the tanline on your wedding finger. If she is educated to a decent standard she will realise that you are married and your ring has simply disappeared, because clothing and other items cannot travel through time. Your nudity will support this.

Step Thirteen: Now comes the hard part - The monologue. In your own words you must give a speech in which you mention all of these key points:

a) You are married to each other in the future

b) Her current boyfriend is dead

c) The world is coming to an end. It's up to you to pick a reason, but I would recommend a war against machines. This whole situation will be backed up by the Terminator franchise

d) In the future your relationship is not going well

e) You've come back in time because you can't help but feel that she would have been happier with her current boyfriend if he hadn't been killed

f) Her current boyfriend is going to be hit by a bus on a day six months from her present. She should stop him going to work that day

g) If she does exactly what you say this current version of yourself will be erased and you will never get married. If she questions this flaw in your time travel logic, because you cannot change the past, simply reference Back to the Future

Step Fourteen: Unless your friend is made of stone she will now be overcome by emotion, especially at your selflessness. Get to your feet and go to kiss her goodbye. It is important that you do this with the confidence of a man who has done this to her many times.

Step Fifteen: There is now no possible way that you aren't about to have sex with her. You're naked, kissing her, in her bedroom, agreeing to erase a version of yourself from history to make her happy. And as far as she knows you've had sex many times in a future that will no longer happen, so she thinks to herself that maybe she should have one memory of it.

Step Sixteen: After having the sex, ask to borrow some clothes then leave.

Step Seventeen: Shave off your beard and coat your wedding finger in fake tan. Carry on as if nothing has happened. There will be three possible outcomes:

1) During the sex some feelings that she didn't know existed are awakened and she will leave her boyfriend for you.

2) Life will carry on as normal.

3) You will be filled with guilt because of this moral grey area where you aren't entirely sure if what you've done counts as some kind of low level rape. You will take your own life by hanging, overdose or wrist cutting.

Obviously, this nonsense must be copied from somewhere.

You better use your precious time wisely

ChangeIsCostant:
According to a Facebook report, a man identified as Emma from Emu Ebendo, in Ndokwa west local government area of Delta state, was attacked by Fulani Herdsmen while working in his farm yesterday...He was allegedly left in a bloodied state by his attackers as shown in the picture....

Source; http://www.nationalhelm.net/2017/01/man-allegedly-attacked-by-fulani.html

May God save us from those cows

Compliant:
Greetings all and happy Xmas

I wonder if we still have regulatory body in this country

Banks are now scammers

Yesterday I went to a nearby ATM point of ecobank here in abuja , queue was very long but decided to wait .

It was then I realise that the reason for the long queue is that the maximum you can withdraw is 5000 with a charge of 65naira when you make use of other bank ATM . this is against the normal 65 naira on every 3rd use of the ATM imposed on us few months ago

Meaning if you are withdrawing 20000 you will have to do that 4 times and you will also be charge 260naira

Now imagine the number of people that will be using ATM this festive period

No notice whatsoever from ecobank to the effect that you will be charge 65naira on EVERY USE

IS THIS CHANGE OR WHAT ?

Are you sure of this?, because i used my card to collect 10k yesterday on their ATMachine.

Probably you have done more that 3 transaction for this month.

saints2:
All Progressives Congress (APC) member in Niger, Alhaji Kabiru Rijau, has lauded the efforts of the Nigerian Military in the ongoing fight against insurgents in the North east.

Rijau told the News Agency of Nigeria (NAN) in Minna on Sunday that the Military had demonstrated professionalism by directing terrible blows on insurgents in the Sambisa forest of Borno.
He also commended President Muhammadu Buhari for the political will to fight the insurgents and other criminal activities in the country.

Rijau called on Nigerians to continue to support security personnel deployed to fight the insurgents with prayers for successful military operations to end the insurgency.

He also appealed to Nigerians to take the advantage of the Christmas and New Year festivities, to seek God`s intervention for solutions to the current economic recession and insecurity challenges in the country.

The APC member said that prayers among Nigerians were essential at this period for God`s special intervention in the nation’s socio-economic and political activities.

Rijau advised businessmen and women against rampant increase in prices of food items before, during and after the festivities.

He also called on Nigerians to support the President Buhari-led administration to enable it implement its laudable programmes for the development of the country.

He expressed confidence that the nation would be great under the present administration and urged Nigerians to continue to be patient with the/MTM government at all levels.

Source:
http://www.ajayiwrites.com/2016/12/boko-haram-apc-commends-military.html

Thank God.
We won the battle with the extremist.

otee42:
i am not happy that i am going to spent this chrismas in a low key...................indoor tins,No lale

This isn't nice at all
I learnt that's after verification
Let's hope it will be paid before New Year.

Mtcheeewfree:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zLR8CR-U4-I

I can't wait to see this FF8

supaphlymee:
This man is sick in the head and deserves to be stoned to death

hmmmn

Ama80:
Ecobank is doing bvn update n I don't have any required identity cards and they have denied me access to withdrawal. None of id card is easy to process. Pls advice me for I need d money badly

Have you been in contact with your Banker for assistance?.
I don't think we Nairalander have solution to issues like this.
I will advise you to contact your Bank or send them email at engcontactcentre@ecobank.com with your account details

iwatch:
Yeah, I am aware of that.

Our Economy is in disarray

Ijebulogic:
I come from a generation of Nigerians that protested against injustice and oppression from the Military that gave us the democracy we have today. But guess what? Apart from the military rule, the economic and infrastructure challenges were not as bad as they are today. But for some reason, today's weak social media, blog, internet influenced youth do absolutely nothing but abuse each other online like cowards.
Last night a very hungry looking but extremely well-spoken youth approached me at the ATM asking for money. He said "I just got out of prison" .help me "pastor" ..I don't know why he thought I was a pastor. I engaged him to know his background. Degree holder, smart, no job, wrong place at wrong time, got arrested, no big man connections, now released , homeless, no future. He has been failed by Nigeria and the leadership. I asked him how his fellow graduates are doing and he said they were all on the streets "hustling" apart from a few who were connected.I asked him why there isn't a youth movement to challenge all the injustice that his generation his facing? He looked like me like I was talking Greek and said, "Pastor , please just 1k for food". That's the story of todays youth. They lack vision to see that 1k today for food is nothing. They must challenge the injustice and seek equity in this nation. The smartest youth are too busy on nairaland abusing tribes or setting up gossip blogs. Gone are the Nigerians that took charge of the country in their 20s and 30s. Now we just have weak, spineless cowards , led by their grandfathers like babies. Nigerian youth ...wake up.

Wake up call for Nigerian youth

livingg:
Misplaced priority....... Love not the world

Ja ra e

badassProdigy:
Just showing off her Calvin Kleins...

http://www.certifiednaija.com/2016/12/lady-puts-panties-on-display-at-party.html?m=1

This isn't show off, It's called Madness

Yabiola26:
Please did anyone know of Enaruna Ferguson with this account number 5503010618 ECOBANK...he just scammed me of 3500... He is supposedly into data transfer biz and we agreed on 3500 for 15gig...He promise to send the data before payment but on a condition he will not activate it till he got confirmation of payment..I send him the money since 8am or so in the morning till now he keep posting me...0814 162 9384 is his number... Someone should please tell the right forum to post the devilish act so as to wade off others who might wanna fall into his trap..

This is sad in this recession?. My advise to you is to send an email to them at engcontactcentre@ecobank.com or call 07005000000

hankkk:
my guys, who's up for glo airtime in exchange for funding my bet9ja account.. merrybet, ecobank and interswitch no wan fix me with my 3k oh.. abeg epp!!

I don't think anyone here has something to do as regards this. Why you no kukuma call their contact centre on 07005000000 or email them engcontactcentre@ecobank.com with your complaint rather than waiting for Nairalander's [color=#000099][/color]

AbuMaryam1:
What a shame less than 2mins man u 0 - 1 westham

Ope ooo

Onyemadonald:
The Federal Government has agreed to ban unqualified and unregistered teachers from classrooms nationwide, the Registrar/Chief Executive of Teachers Registration Council ofNigeria, Prof. Josiah Ajiboye, has said.According to him, the government will not consider teachers without registration certificates and TRCN licence for its 500,000 teachers’ recruitment scheme.

He stated that already, the decision had beenjointly endorsed by President Muhammadu Buhari; the Minister of Education, Mallam Adamu Adamu and Minister of State for Education, Prof. Anthony Anwukah. Ajiboye said this on Wednesday in Abuja during the 10th Education Conference organised by the National Association of Proprietors of Private Schools, with the theme, “Improving Education standards and emulating the global perspective and practices.”

He said, “Presently, it has been accepted by the Federal Government; the President, and ministers of education have agreed that no one again that is not qualified and is not registered with the TRCN will stand and teachin our classrooms.“I can assure you that no one will be employedas a teacher by the Federal Government without licence and registration certificate.
We are calling on all teachers to register, if you know yourself and you refer to yourself as a professional teacher, you must be registered with the TRCN. You must carry ourcertificate and our licence. “At the last induction ceremony that was conducted last week in OAU (Obafemi AwolowoUniversity), Ile-Ife, six professors registered with the TRCN and 14 other academics were also inducted into the teaching profession.
”While calling on teachers both in public and private schools to ensure they were duly registered and licensed by the TRCN, Ajiboye said the Kaduna State Government, had directed its teachers to obtain their licences and registration certificates before they could be promoted.He said, “Teachers in private schools are also expected to be registered and licensed by theTRCN.

According to the law establishing the council we are the ones who can talk about whois a teacher in this country.“Currently, teachers in private schools are responding to TRCN’s call for them to register. Now we are in the level of persuasionwhen we move beyond this level we will go to the enforcement of the law.”The President of NAPPS, Dr. Sally Adukwu-Bolujoko, called on the Federal Government toinvest 50 per cent of the budget in education every year for the next 20 years to revamp public schools. He added, “From 2012 to date, all the budgetsin education have just been about 11 per cent, whereas you know that UNESCO’s benchmark for developing country is 26 per cent. Countries like Senegal and Ivory Coast have started to give more than 26 per cent. With our large population, and the biggest economyin Africa, we have not reached half the mark of UNESCO.

“The state of our public schools is appalling. Itis not a place where value is given. It is a placewhere the values children acquire from good homes get eroded. We are asking that as a matter of strategy, focus on education by funding it and having the political will to driveand to monitor our money till it delivers results.“We are bothered that the Nigerian child’s education is poor, under the threes, dilapidated houses, sitting on bricks and on the floor. Every child should be captured in school. No longer should a Nigerian child be at home or hawking when others are in school.”


http://katsinapost.com/2016/11/24/n-power-fg-to-disqualify-those-without-teaching-qualifications/

Watch out for the second batch name, to be release on Monday

tokuboeric:
Pls, I will like to know what TB rates in the recent past with Ecobank, because I av an investment (Fixed Deposit) with the bank at 10.75%, But every now and again I discuss TBills with my account officer she always confuse me that Fixed deposit is better, and I believe all this is for her own advantage, Pls house, I will like to know the past rates. Thanks

This is beyond this forum. I will suggest you liaise with your Banker or contact them for more enquiries. I also have investment with them (Fixed Deposit) and thee rate is kinda cool.

EdifiedCEO:
PHOTOS: VP Osinbajo, Bayelsa gov Seriake Dickson, Emir of Kano, Oba of Lagos, others at the wedding of Awujale of Ijebuland's daughter

Sidikat Motunrayo Adetoun, the daughter of the Awujale of Ijebuland, Oba (Dr.) Sikiru Adetona wedded her heartthrob, Olanrewaju Oladiran recently. Vice President Yemi Osinbajo, Emir of Kano Muhammad Sanusi II, Oba of Lagos Rilwan Akiolu, Bayelsa state governor Seriake Dickson attended the wedding.

http://www.newshelm.com/2016/11/photos-osinbajo-oba-of-lagos-emir-of.html

cc lalasticlala

Money speaking !!!

naijanewsmag:
Agai Joshua who stole the red carpet with his yellow colour outfit at the Africa Fashion week explained that studying Theatre Arts at the Igbenedion University, Okada, was to mold him into who he is today.

He stressed that the society has not been fair to him as he has been tagged with all kinds of name but he is happy that his family loves him the way he is and his girl lover who never abandons him.

“I am a model and an upcoming designer but as a model, I have faced a lot of challenges because if you really want to be a perfect model and a very creative one at that and you are walking on the street and you want to portray a look called mannequin and the next thing people will begin to wonder if you are normal, this can be so annoying but we thank God for everything.

Read more at http://naijanewsmag.com/2016/08/nigerian-model-agai-joshua-says-he-feels-sad-when-people-describes-him-as-gay/#pebDmcBulJdLRp3l.99

Hey Kpele

You too try get yourself together, you facial appearance isn't cool for guy. However, that doesnt mean you should be wrongly accused.

Sorry

murmee:
Especially Lagos to Ibadan to Ilorin. That train route in long overdue!

From Ilorin to Lagos takes almost forever.

itelMobileNG:
A. Position: Content Writer and Online Communities Executive

Job Description
1. Should be creative
2. Collaborate with designers, product marketing, sales, and external influencers and industry experts to produce relevant content that meets the needs of our audience.
3. Should respect the intellectual property of others and should be able to develop original content
4. Should have a good command of descriptive, persuasive and narrative writing
5. Should be good at reporting
6. Should be able to develop subject ideas
7. Should have the ability to captivate and engage audience with words
8. Should be self-motivated and be able to work under minimal supervision

Candidate Requirements
1. Curiosity and passion for Telecom and Mobile industry (a must).
2. Candidate must be fluent in English.
3. Strong ability to achieve result
4. Can work with minimal supervision
5. Must be very articulate and highly focused individuals with a strong desire to achieve set objectives.
6. Ability to think outside the box and generate unconventional ideas.
7. Ability to use various Microsoft office packages
8. Must have worked in Advertising or Public Relations Firms
 

B. Social Media Executive

Job Description
1. Build and manage the company’s social media profiles and presence, including Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and potentially additional channels (Snapchat, LinkedIn, Google+).
2. Generate, edit, publish and share daily content (original text, images, video or HTML) that builds meaningful connections and encourages community members to take action
3. Set up and optimize company pages within each platform to increase the visibility of company’s social content
4. Moderate all user-generated content in line with the moderation policy for each community
5. Continuously improve by capturing and analyzing the appropriate social data/metrics, insights and best practices, and then acting on the information
6. Collaborate with other departments to manage reputation, identify key players and coordinate actions.
7. Listen and engage in relevant social discussion about our company, competitors, and/or industry, both from existing customers and leads and from brand new audiences that don’t yet know us.
8. Run regular social promotions and campaigns and track their success
9. Explore new ways to engage and new social networks to reach our target buyers.

Requirements:
1. Curiosity and passion for Telecom and Mobile industry (a must).
2. Past experience producing content for channel-specific audience (blog, Nairaland, Facebook, Twitter, etc.)
3. Deep knowledge and a passion for social media marketing is a must.
4. Active and well-rounded personal presence on social media, with a command of each network and their best practices.
5. Excellent communicator and creative thinker, with an ability to use both data and intuition to inform decisions.
6. Proven working experience in social media or related field
7. Demonstrable social networking experience and social analytics tools knowledge
8. Knowledge of online marketing and good understanding of major marketing channels
9. Positive attitude, detail and customer oriented with good multi-tasking and organizational ability
10. Excellent written and communication skills for internal & external correspondence is essential.
11. Strong understanding of current online marketing concepts, strategy and best practice.

 
C. PR/ Communications Executive

Job Description
1. Develop comprehensive and detailed communications and PR strategies for Brand /Product and execute them in a timely and effective manner (Internal and external).
2. Supervising and liaising with agency to develop and execute the communication contents/articles/events.
3. Analyze the effectiveness of these strategies by looking at relevant metrics such as ROI, CAC and CPO as necessary.
4. Build relationships with local and international media on behalf of the company including both conventional (newspapers, radio, TV) and digital (bloggers, e-channels) media.
5. Organize and coordinate events such as press conferences, exhibitions and conferences.
6. Responsible for building and sustaining the company's reputation for quality, reliability, and customer satisfaction.
7. Monitoring media and consumer sentiment and follow up with agency for actions as necessary
8. Crisis and issue management, including gathering facts, drafting /statements and announcement
9. Prepare report for top management on regular basis.

Requirements:
1. Curiosity and passion for Telecom and Mobile industry (a must).
2. Willingness to work in a fast-moving, dynamic company with fast changing targets.
3. Strong project management skills and ability to manage several projects simultaneously.
4. Strong editorial skills with an eye for attention to detail
5. Proficiency in Microsoft Office tools (Word, Excel and Power Point) and Google Office productivity tools.
6. Proven communicator with excellent written and verbal communications skills
7. Willingness to take challenge and meet deadline under pressure
8. Work experience in PR agency, multinational company, or media is highly preferred
9. A Master’s degree is an advantage
10. Professional certification in Marketing or related field is a plus

 
D. Creative Graphics Designer

Job Description
1. Determine the scope of a project
2. Advise on strategies to reach a particular audience
3. Determine the message the design should portray
4. Create images that identify a product or convey a message
5. Develop graphics for product illustrations
6. Advise and Incorporate changes recommended by the Digital Marketing manager into the final design

Requirements:
1. At least 1-2 years’ experience in graphic design, web and media graphics
2. Creative and innovative in graphic design
3. Excellent skills on infographics, after effect and Photoshop
4. Good in motion graphics
5. Must be proficient with the Adobe creative suite (Photoshop, Illustrator, Indesign, and After Effect).
6. Photography and video editing will be an added advantage
7. Must be able to look at their work from the point of view of consumers and examine how the designs that’ll be developed will be perceived by the consumer to ensure they convey the client’s desired message.
8. Must be able to communicate with employer and other designers to ensure that designs accurately reflect the desired message and effectively express information.
9. Creativity. Must be able to think of new approaches to communicating ideas to consumers, and develop unique designs that convey a recognizable meaning.
10. Time-management skills. Must be able to work on multiple projects at the same time, each with a different deadline.
11. Proficiency in Sketch is an added advantage.

Interested candidates should please send their resumes to oke.umu@itel-mobile.com stating the preferred Job role as the subject of the email.
Application Closing Date: 4pm on Friday, 26th August 2016.

For real