₦airaland Forum

chika98:
This chic. . Odika imaro na men LOVE their space!! Just think about this little bit

Oh yeah mayne, you have just proven me wrong. That is so much of a compromise for a man. I mean giving up his space for his wife, is utterly breath taking. He deserves all the world. Nonsense. Like women don't like their space.

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834423#msg2834423 date=1222040856]Exactly!
He has given up a lot of his own personal comforts for our sake too.
That's the only a marriage can survive.
Anyone not willing to give up things should stay single.
Marriage is not compulsory.[/quote]Na lie. Gini has he given up? Nothing.

[quote author=Gucci_Babe link=topic=173975.msg2834412#msg2834412 date=1222040596]i feel you on that one, but i guess thats the way it is,  this thread is such an eye opener,  ***sigh****[/quote]I mean seriously it baffles me how much a woman endures in a marriage. It utter surprises me. I mean this marriage thing just puts me back. Cause I don't want to be second hand to anyone. I like being in control. That is just me.

davidylan:
I feel for you . . . next time come as a man.  

But seriously, men do compromise a lot too. If you find a man who loves you with all his heart, you can get him to worship the very ground you walk on if you are intelligent enough.

You claim men compromise, but you have yet to give atleast one example.

chika98:
Compromise isn't a one sided thing. Men do compromise as well

Example please.

StephenP:
*sigh* Onyinye, I got the prefect boyfriend for you https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-171263.0.html

Gini? Are you implying i have a nasty attitude?

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834390#msg2834390 date=1222040139]david leave Onyinye alone.
Wait till she finds her Okonkwo, her type will be kneeling and serving him his foo foo [/quote]Yeah. . . . right. The day im kneeling for another fellow mortal. . . . I must be at gun point.

Seriously. . . all this marriage talk got me wondering. Cause you are lawfully stick with this one sole person for the REST of your natural born life. And like folk are over her talking about "Compromise" but it seems like the whole "compromise" thing is one sided. Like the wife has to compromise [/i]everything so that as stated [i]"there will be peace." I mean how does one keep their sanity with that. I mean Day in and Day out, you have to compromise so that your husband is happy, and your kids are happy. So what the hell am I? Cause I thought im going to be happy.

StephenP:
It not selfish but realistic. You can say all you want to say about it but in the end, we all know that many times, the woman does it the man's way, not because she's weaker but because she knows that is the best way for there to be peace.

na lie. It is selfish. You are just looking from a Man's point-of-view, so of course it won't sound selfish. You are in favor.

davidylan:
eyah. Sorry o. 
Queenisha, our resident counselor, will soon knock sense into your head. Pay attention . . . people pay good money for the kind of advice she is giving.

Well you must not knw, I follow the Gospel of Onyinye and she does what is best for her and her husband.

StephenP:
Goodness, did you really ask that?
Please lecture Onyinye.

Yeah. . . . I did. I was hoping for a different answer, but I got the same selfish answer as the rest.

davidylan:
you have plenty of growing to do. _{*shakes head*}

And you my friend, have alot of EVOLVING to do.

davidylan:
Sorry, No.

Well well well. . . . . I guess I'm going to have to do some changing with that statement. Because a marriage is GIVE na TAKE. Not the wife does ALL the GIVING and the so called loving husband does all the TAKING.

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834351#msg2834351 date=1222039048]But major things like the name for the kids,their schools,the home we buy, business ventures etc, we discuss it and thankfully most of the time, we have same opinions but[b] when they differ,I  go with his.[/b]
His thoughts for our family are good thoughts and I have no problems with it.[/quote]Maka gini? Why would you go with his? Why not your own?

davidylan:
Sorry, no.

Excuse me? Come again. . . . . .

Hannibal:
May God help Onyinye's hubby.
He might have to carry a gun with him always.

Sharrup Dia.
May Gawd be with the woman that you marry. She is going to be one heck of a woman. It aint easy being a puppet to someone.

davidylan:
when Bush talked about someone doing "one heck of a job" we all know what followed.  
Onyinye2, sorry but get set to face painful facts . . . when you get married your desires and wishes become subordinate to that of your husband. Even the most domesticated, gentlest of all men. Such is life . . . the best wives know how to deal with such situations.

So what of her husband? Does his wishes and so called desires become subordinate to that of his wife?

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834308#msg2834308 date=1222038147]My sister for an opinionated person like myself, I still see my strong self rising up every once in a while but I hate the aftermath so I have learnt over the years that some things are just not worth it.
I know deep down in me that my husband loves me and is not out to make me miserable.
When we disagree in issue,I let him know my opinion but I don't push it if it differs wih his.
Men love to be respected even when they are talking rubbish
[b]make your point,calmy and with explanations and leave it there[/b]and I can assure you, he'll pick the better option when he lays down to think it through.
That is my secret weapon.[/quote]But why does he have to make the decision? That is what baffles me. We say that we are in the 21st century, yet I feel that we live like does of the Medieval Ages. If he makes all the decisions, what is the point of me then? Just to sit back and accept it?

I'm going to be one heck of a wife. Submission ko, guidelines ni. I will do what I feel is right for me and him.

Hannibal:
Sip tea ALL DAY??
u gotta be kidding me.
Keep getting busy(eat more, dance less, add weight).

Oka, I dont every minute of the day
Hey, you live in England don't you? Yes, and yal just love your blessed tea

davidylan:
minus one . . . who's chickening out next? 

Sharrup dia, nonsense boy.  Who said I was chickening out?

Hannibal:
Who knows?
Pumbaa looks the type that multi-tasks.
Pre Med + Food + Sports + makossa dancing.

LMAO!!! Of course now. Hehehehe. . . . . I've got to keep myself busy. Esp, in a place I live. Unlike you, who just sips tea ALL DAY.

davidylan:
After marriage - the woman is to submit and the man is to put his feet up on the couch. Chikena. If you don't like it don't marry.

Osisi. . . . i don't think i want to get married.

Hannibal:
Are u sure you don't own these restaurants??

LMAO!!! What is a pre med student like me doing with restaurants? Naw, i don't own them, i just know the owners well well.

Osisi, how did you get to the part where you give more and take less? Cause knowing me, that is something i truly don't grasp.

Hannibal:
Noted!!!

Also try to visit D' Village, it is another Nigerian restaurant.

Hannibal:
Pumbaa, money line stops because of the loose change one pays @ FingerLicking??
Do u know how much we pay for Naija food over here?
It's TWICE/THRICE as much as FingerLicking so i am used to it.

Well of course now, the Naija population in Houston is down right breath taking. I mean you have witnessed yourself. A whole chain of stores just dedicated to Nigerians. But on the real note, FingerLicking over charges on their food. Go to Suya Hut and you get a better deal.

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834206#msg2834206 date=1222036281]I'm sure you already know I'm not a door mat.
Submission does not mean being brain dead.
My mom says that it takes awhole lot of common sense to stay married.
A marriage will never ever work until the woman realizes that ther's no power tussle going on.
I had to learn that.
The fundamental thing is the kind of man one is married to.
Open your eyes during coursthip and be ready to call it quits at anytime if the man shows any signs of being unreasonable and abusive.
Respect is the key and being  Christian,I sought for a man na atu egwu Chineke (That fears the Lord)
And I have absolutey no problems in submitting to his authority.
A man who loves and respects your opinions is very easy to submit to[/quote]You see right there is my BIGGEST PROBLEM. I love to be in control. I know, yal know it, my family knows it, heck the whole world knows it. So when I lose that "control" I feel like I have no say in anything. That I am nothing but a puppet to your every move.

tRoOE:
Why does women Compromise more than  men it been bugging me lately

Seriously. . . . this is what makes me so apprehensive about marriage.

And about kids. . . . . . . . idk
I wanna enjoy life before i have to have responsibilities towards my own flesh and blood.

Hannibal:
FingerLicking till the day ma pulse STOPS!!!

Or till the day your money line stops.

Nwannem Stephen, hapu ya aka. He aint even worth it. Let him to continue to zuzu around.

rampagain:
osisi so ooo onye abia u marry?
onyinye im around ooooo,my house dey boring,soo mu no nu'no

You Abia staters. . . . geez louise. Ebe ka unu niile esi na Enugu State?

Osisi. . . . awotahum kedu isi mee ya I mean submission sounds like something that aint gonna fit me well

Hannibal:
Noted!!!

Next time you come to Houston, go to all the numerous Nigerian restaurants besides FingerLicking.

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834112#msg2834112 date=1222034827]e he now!
tiger si na abia state [/quote]Awww. . . . . mayne. Gini bu unu niile na these Abia State men? Gosh, I hope Jenny aint around. Anyways. . . . Nne si na Abia State.

Also, I really don't think a gam amuta to be that kind of wife
Something about submission. . . . scares me to death.

[quote author=A-40 link=topic=174126.msg2834059#msg2834059 date=1222034066]@onyinye
Your attention is highly needed on the NFL thread [/quote]LMAO!!!! I have been trying to avoid that thread.

Hannibal:
Eat and look like u are 8 months preggers??
Akpu and Eba makes the belly go POT!!!

I rather eat that than starve myself with tasteless salads.

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834045#msg2834045 date=1222033894]For me, I married my soul mate
a man who loves the Lord, loves me and would give his life for me
I married at the prime of my life  so I don't really know what it means to be single and live on my own.
I married a man who lets me be me and  the big change is me realising that my decisions affect him and our family
I've always been a homebody so marriage suits me well.
What I like best about being married[b] to the one I'm married to ([/b]who by the way, is a very intelligent man) is knowing that when I pick up the phone and call wherever he is, he'll drop everything and give me the attention required.
That's why I get mad when I see all the generalizations on Nairaland about Nigerian men.
There are still many good men out there and I have one of them nightly on my bed [/quote]Nwoke bu onye Igbo abi?

Hannibal:
Quality is expensive.
It's imperative u eat healthy foods so u can look super FIT in ur spandex.

LMAO!!!! hehehehe let me eat what i wanna eat jare.  

rampagain:
seriously onyi and ruby,u people should just ignore naawee,ignore him and let him continue wt his "yoh mehn " and so on

Oka o. Anyi ga hapu ya aka. But nwoke ahu na-eme ka onye isi adighi mma.

Hannibal:
Onyinye is in ma black book already.
We used to be very kool until she dumped ma favourite joint in Texas for an Igbo restaurant munching everything her snake eyes can see.

Don't come to me when ur BMI goes bazooka.

I'm sorry Mufasa. . . . . I still go to Fingerlicking every weekend, but I just go to the D'Village alot more. I still love Fingerlicking though. . . . its prices are high.

Cristalz:
Aw,sowhry hawney.   .   .   .   .  .uh,i mean sorry honey I'll be good

Its onyinye's fault sha,she taught me

Sawrey. . . . hehehehe

Unu niile{all}

Ka anyi gaa{Let us go} Onwerozi{ Nothing more}for us to say to this mugu.