₦airaland Forum

dyabman:
onyinye what up everybody is on You
can i help?

Help with what. . . . .

superstan:
onyinye is feeling the vibes.

Yesir, ya got it on the straight way. Ya feel me.

idupaul:
@ onyinye
must You always insult? i knew You were being sarcastic, but by the time i knew twas supposed be to sarcastic i had hit the reply button

Just shut up already, jeez you is a pest. WTF do you mean by insult, it was your dumb ass that insulted me so you can stuff that up your idiotic brain.



[quote author=Ruby_Pearl link=topic=175745.msg2855312#msg2855312 date=1222382058]Oyinye, stop talking like that
ugh, you sound like naweed [/quote]Oka o. . . . sorry. You know Naaweed, reps that N.T.T.G. for lyfe. It is all about "Negros Thinking They Gangstas"

Pilgrim, your story is just so touching. . . . i mean I can barely soak it all in. It just touched me where I have never been touched by a story sense. The way you stuck it through, enduring all those hard times just puts me in awww. You are true Superwoman, cause i bet not many ladies would have continued on with all the things you endured. I must admit, that after reading this, I'm surely not walking away the same person.

superstan:
are you naawee's sibling?

As i said mayne, it bout them N.T.T.G. ya feel me. They fittin na go to the top mayne. It bout being fake to the day Osama wake, ya digg.

tope2000:

LMAO!!! It bout them N.T.T.G. For Life Shawty. All day, Every day. Ruff Ryders.

idupaul:
You just too fake, wetin bring American revolutionary war history enter here now, am sure You were the one nawee met and quickly concluded on naija women.

Efulefu si ebea zuzupu nwanzuzu. I bu ewu. Go and clap for yaself. Stupid idiot. Want go and insult me you stupid ass illiterate. Go back to your yard, pick up a dictionary, you do know what a dictionary is, or are you too stupid for that. Take that dictionary, and look up the word sarcasm. Study the word, then come back and read my post you tonto. Continue to zuzu around agadi awoke.

tope2000:
@post
OK this naawee or na 'were' dude is getting on my last nerve .

Hey yo yo yo. . . . shawty yall besta hop off mi boi Naawee. Ya heard me. He the O.G. of Boston. Na saying. He was the negro ova there who instead of having a Boston Tea Party, shiz. . . . brotha man went had Boston Palmwine Festival. Yeah yeah yeah, ya na whut I'm saying? Negro Reppin for that N.T.T.G all day every day. Ya heard me. Can I get a whut whut from somebody, you know it is that N.T.T.G. up in this peace. We fittin na break yal off will a little sum n, sum n. Ya know, show yal whut it all bout. It all bout them N.T.T.G. "[b]N[/b]egros [b]T[/b]hinking [b]T[/b]hey [b]G[/b]angstas". Yeah yeah yeah, yal heard me straight. So don't get twisted, because we iz about being fake to the day Osama wake. We Ruff Ryders in this peace and ya besta recognize. Ya digg.

Naawee, give it a rest already. DAMN!!!! If you don't think Nigerian women are pretty, fine. We don't need your approval. Especially your approval. In fact, I doubt any of us give a damn if you date us or not. We rather you not because, you are the reason why wonderful enchanting Nigerian men are given bad names. Because little bad eggs like you, just walk around like you have the RIGHT to speak of anyone else's beauty status. So please, do us all a favor, and leave this forum and your outrageous posts.

tpia:
ok- once and for all, my question had nothing to do with tithes. I don't see how you're inferring I meant Igbo men don't pay tithes, from that particular post. na wa for sensitivity!
And is not paying tithe a sin, in any case, for you to get so defensive?
if you notice, I asked if her boyfriend was Igbo after I mentioned the pastor's sermon. it was an afterthought.

tpia:
@ topic: if you say you're a Christian( Huh), then your husband is supposed to have the authority to cancel some of your decisions if he's so inclined, after you marry. Any married couple from different religious backgrounds will tell you that.

So if your guy says no tithing, then don't tithe, because if you do so secretly, then its at your own risk. There's a bible verse which applies to this kind of thing. Something about a girl's father and husband being able to cancel her vows. Old testament though, so you can ignore it if you feel like, i guess, or if your pastor pulls up a different verse to counteract it.

Anyway, after marriage, your husband can even order you to stop attending your church and you're supposed to obey or at least pamper him into an agreeable state of mind.

I once listened to one pastor’s sermon where he described how he used to order his wife to start pounding yam as soon as he saw her getting ready to go to church. He was a muslim then and very anti-Christian.  The lady obeyed even though it made her sad - that’s one thing that touched his heart, and he later changed his mind about letting her go to church.


None of the above reflects my personal views. Am just stating what I've heard, since you've suddenly decided to go religious.


Something tells me your b/friend may be Igbo and am wondering if you met him via nairaland in some way? Just curious.

You must not be reading what I am reading. If you weren't trying to imply that Igbo men don't pay tithes or what have you, why did you mention them? In fact, it was basically out of context and off topic. It had absolutely nothing to do with the Original post, but you felt it needed to be added when it didn't. Good job my friend.

tpia:
what in the world are you and onyinye gonig on about?
I don't like Igbos because i said Deepzone's boyfriend may be igbo?
Someone please explain what I'm not getting here.
and while you're at it, pull up the post where I said I don't like Igbos.  Though I fail to see what liking or disliking igbos has to do with my post sha. And whether i like or dislike, does it affect your salary?

I wasn't trying to come off as defensive but you were implying that Igbo men don't pay tithes. Which you have no evidence to prove and is a disrespectful assumption. If I were to say that Yoruba men don't pay tithes watch wahala and WWIII start. Mentioning Ndi Igbo had nothing to do with the original post and it was basically you trying to start trouble.

[quote author=Ruby_Pearl link=topic=175124.msg2844584#msg2844584 date=1222213425]you too?[/quote]I'm sorry, just wanted to make a point clear. Udo.(peace)

tpia:
Something tells me your b/friend may be Igbo and am wondering if you met him via nairaland in some way? Just curious.

What does Ndi Igbo have to do with eh? Nothing so stop starting unnecessary trouble. In fact eh, you will be the main one to go and rant about how people are so tribal, but look at yaself. Agadi nwoke.

@Lady T,

Your picture looks gorgeous. I really like the braids in your hair.

LadyT:
P.S I don't believe in joint accounts its best everyone has their own personal AND a joint account.

HELL YEAH!!!! [/b]I'm a strong believer that married folk should resist have only one sole account. They should have a joint account and their personal one. Just having one sole account is asking trouble, in fact you are past asking for trouble. You invited it to come and relax in your house. Pull up its feet and watch its destruction begin.

Anyways. . . . . tithing is a [b]PERSONAL thing. If you choose to tithe, oya then tithe. If you choose not to tithe, then don't. But just don't belittle those who do. I personally tithe, and have been since i was like a child. I mean I just feel that it is right to give back to what the Lord has blessed me with. But if my partner choose not to tithe, so be it. I aint going to cross him out of my life. That is [b]HIS [/b]decision and choice with God. I mean I might try and persuade him but if he feels that it is not what he believes in, who am I to try and confirm him into doing so? I wouldn't want him doing such to me, so I should I do to him? So just let life be life, and let him do whatever. It is [b]HIS [/b]relationship with God, not yours.

It depends. . . .

I remember this one guy that all we did was clash all the time, but didn't mean that I didn't love him. Just that we didn't get along.
Of course that relationship didn't last that long. . . . but we remain some what of friends. I mean we civil towards eachother.

Oka. . . . oka, I have returned. Yes, I know what happened to the Texans, don't need any reminders. If you want to remind me . . . . . well prepare for a Sport Debate.

And besides, this was an off week, you know Hurricane Ikechukwu displaced somethings so we have some off a excuse.

KarmaMod:
Sex is the least he can do for being a loser.

I agree. What else is the guy useful for? You might as well just make him a lock-a-away man. Just have your fun with him, then lock him away. I mean there is no way in hell I could even be in the presence of such a lazy human being. I mean utterly a disgrace. How do you call yourself a man when you behave like a teenage boy? I mean this just baffles. I mean you aint even married yet, he acting like this. God forbid I married a guy like this. Might as well set up a room for me in the asylum cause im going to go insane.

[quote author=Gucci_Babe link=topic=173975.msg2834751#msg2834751 date=1222049222]@oyinye
I said that years ago , and believe me one day you would have to think about it. The most stressful part of not marrying yet, is when your parents are like,  your friend so so so, just got married,, or remember your friend from childhood . " she has a baby" . I remember when i used to hide my relationship from my parents. Now its like the Talk, so who is your fiance, blah blah blah, and when you are in a long relationship you have to think about it sometimes. i used to be so Naive, thinking " i don't know why people always think of  if this person going to settle down with that person vice versa, until now. then its like an eye opener for me. and its such a serious issue. we really need to learn.  i promise you,  its coming at your door pretty quick![/quote]But I don't want to be married anytime soon. I don't want to be thinking about hubsands, kids, submission, sex,compromise, arguing, letting things go, wedding bands. . . . . so on and so forth. I just want to be me and be free. I mean i'm barely into my life, yet im suppose to start a new with someone? that just doesn't seem logical.

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834741#msg2834741 date=1222049036]OSANOBUA!!
a marriage is spiced up by the parties not taking each other for granted.
I still dress up good.
I'm usually the best looking wife at the parties
not because I'm the prettiest but because I take good care to look my best
WE still cuddle and smooch at corners, at the movies if it's almost an empty theatre, in his office
we are still as spontaneous as we were before the kids came
He would still come home for lunch and a "session" on my days off.
We would still do it in his home office,living room,bathroom and shower.
Try new things
That's the way to keep it spiced up and makes us look forward to it[/quote]Oh lawdy lawdy. . . . unu niile di freaks!!! Ahhhh. . . . . don't if i could do all that, i mean dang I'm just too conservative for this jive.

davidylan:
I would add nagging and selfishness on this list too. nothing turns me off faster than a "me-me first" woman.

But wait. . . . don't men put themselves first. . . .

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834709#msg2834709 date=1222048074]He needs to know that his wife is in this with him.
and never ever ever rub it in that you're the main provider or compare him to other men
You will kill him emotionally and those who can't handle that feeling may  gun you down[/quote]Damn (sighs). . . That is what I fear about marriage and men. I mean we take it for granted how strong they are, but actually they are fragile. And i aint going to lie, i would be the chic that would remind a guy that i was the breadwinner in the family in spite of a heated argument.

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834734#msg2834734 date=1222048656]I don't know for other people but for me the day I set my eyes on my husband I knew he was the one.
That's why I believe in love at first sight
I had the qualities I needed in a man and he fit them all.
and moreover I prayed to marry the right spouse
Mine was also easier because I didn't date a whole lot and had never had my heart broken by anyone so I have no man horror stories.
That's why I believe girls should marry young when there are men coming in droves asking for yourhand.
If you wait till the lock begins to tick,desperation may set in and you settle for anyone that comes along just to answer mrs.[/quote]Oh mayne. . . . Then my youth clock is ticking according to your post. I don't want to marry anytime soon and i don't want kids anytime soon. I'm enjoying being Onyinye and free. Marriage is so far down the line, Moses would even shake his head at the journey.

[quote author=Ruby_Pearl link=topic=173975.msg2834693#msg2834693 date=1222047548]When the sky opens and an angel flies over your head and sings "He's the one, the one the one. He's the one" [/quote]And angels come with their harps singing "Hallelujah, Hallelujah. Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hal le lu jah!!!"

davidylan:
Whatever you can or cannot do please don't be frigid o abeg . . . i want you to be happy.

I am happy waiting unit marriage to share that moment with the one i choose to spend the rest of my life with.

[quote author=Ruby_Pearl link=topic=173975.msg2834685#msg2834685 date=1222047177]Oyinye, again? [/quote]Like always.

@osisi
How did you know that you were ready to be married? I mean is there a feeling that one gets or do you just feel it in your heart? How do you know that this is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with? Who I can share all with, and see him as someone i can bare all burdens with?

davidylan:
it has no advantages at all o. please don't let onyinye2 go away with a wrong impression.  
No man wants to live with a log of wood.

Imecha onu kita. You don't know what I can or can not do.

Hannibal:
Stop deceiving yourself.
Every man knows something.
Whether u like it or not, men compare notes and if they every realise they are being short-changed, they seek help outside.
You won't hear anything TRUTHier than this from moi.

WTF!!! Who said i was speaking of a man Mufasa? I was talking about women. . . . agadi nwoke.

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834664#msg2834664 date=1222046592]Why not.
A man that loves you will love you with all the challenges.
I had a tough near rape experience as a teenager (but for God's grace )and it changed my life.
It took a kind, romantic and understanding man to undo what his fellow man did.
I actually do value the fact that my hubby loved me for me not for my bedmatic skills because I had none at first.
and he never made fun of that fact.[/quote]It is official Osisi. A choro m nwoke esi from Abia State. A nam lee anya ofuma for him.

KarmaMod:
I'm wrong for that ke? Did you not see that video of a 3 year old party and how those babies were dancing with grown ups applauding like idiots. Disgusting
Same difference. Actually no. Haitians are better human beings.

LMAO!!! I thought i was the only one who said that vid.

KarmaMod:
They think everyone is like the jamos who started when they were toddlers

ROTFLMAO!!!!
Ka Chukwu mere i ebere!!!
You know you wrong for that.
But them Jamos aint got nothing on those Jambalaya eating N. Orleans folk.

[quote author=Gucci_Babe link=topic=173975.msg2834628#msg2834628 date=1222045882]hmmm  you are a freak so we need sex education to please our hubby,  some Men tend to like Virgins, so i don't understand what can be so bad not knowing how to   [/quote]What is better than being with a person who knows absolutely nothing. It is a fairytale. They have no expectations, no prior wonderful sexual experiences, no ranked "height" of good sex they have gotten. So the guy is free to do whatever, she has nothing to compare to.

davidylan:
i didnt expect you to. You have a lot of work to do. Good thing you're learning here.

Ka Chukwu mere m ebere. Hapu m aka.

davidylan:
Sharrap! Women are talking teenage girls too are quipping . . .  

Not funny. Not laughing.

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834568#msg2834568 date=1222044176]Onyinye na wa for you o
perhaps if we had this conversation some years back,I'll be sounding like you too.
I had a mother who told me some hard truths and modelled it too and I'm grateful for that.[/quote]I'm just not cut out for marriage. I mean my mom told me some stuff too but I mean it just doesnt click to me. I still remember that conversation. She was all

"Onyinye, *shakes head* Onyi Bekee. . . . you and that onu of yours is nsogbu. And will always be. *laughs* You are just like your father. Headstrong. Amuta when to imecha it. A man is a man. How many times have you na nna crossed eh? Because I na think you are right. A man ego will never leave him,so you must learn to work around it. . . .

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834534#msg2834534 date=1222043491]Onyinye say God forbid!
3 times to that prayer.
Tufiakwa
You want a man that has the ego of a dove?
don't you know that's the same ego he'll carry to the outside even at the workplace and have everyone walk all over him?
You need at tiger LOL
You need a man that is fearless.[/quote]Not necessarily a guy who has and Ego of a Dove, but a guy who knows how to turn off that stupid ego. I don't want a guy who is weak, cause knowing me well. . . . . never mind.

Anyways, hey he can be fearless. But I don't want no man who feels he gotta be fearless all the time. That is just utter stupidity to me. Because they be the ones who are weak as hell. I don't want someone who has a huge ego and feels that just because he is among the male species he has some of authority over me.

joshjosh:
you will be marrying a dangerous man.  marraige is not that difficult. it is a beautifull institution. God meant it for good

The only thing about marriage that sounds remotely beautiful is the wedding ceremony. The rest is uhhhhhh. . . . .

Hannibal:
That mentality would change when in 3-4 years time.

Let's hope.[quote author=Gucci_Babe link=topic=173975.msg2834524#msg2834524 date=1222043233]Another question

  how is sex during marriage?  do you husband still look at you like he did before having a kid ( i mean when your body is tight n aall) how often do you lay down together. is it different after marriage.  when you ask for sex does he turn you down, cause maybe he knows he can get it when he wants[/quote]Ahhh. . . . . marriage is so difficult.

chika98:
Sounds like a push over to me. I don't think you'D like that very much.

Naw. . . . takes out all the fun of it all. I mean where is the challenge.

[quote author=Gucci_Babe link=topic=173975.msg2834486#msg2834486 date=1222042428]you will want day get married.  I see many ladies desperate of finding a husband. I think when love take over your heart, you may not have a choice[/quote]Hold Up! There is ALWAYS a choice to be made.

Marriage is hard work mayne. I mean serious work. With the Grace of God, I will marry a guy with the Ego of a Dove. Cause i know otherwise, there is going to be some serious collision.

[quote author=_Queenisha link=topic=173975.msg2834450#msg2834450 date=1222041642]Going to sports bars no I
he's a die hard sports fan.

secondly there has been business ventures he wanted to go it but I didn't feel good about them and advised him and he went with my opinion and later thanked me for the advice.
If he were a singl eman he wouldn't need anyone's opinion on that.

thirdly he recently went out and test drove and brought home a brand new car which they let him keep for 2 days to make up his mind,I talked him out of it and he returned it.
He calls me an intelligent woman and I know God has blessed me with that gift.
My earlier mistake when we were newly married was to say my opinions as a matter of fact and insist that was the way things would go and he refused them not because they were not sound opinions but because of the way they came out.
Why?
because he's a man
that's the way they are
they are wired differently and we can't do anything about it.
That's the way God made them.
They are go getters and don't care much about details like women do.
They are not emotional beings like us
It took me years to get this.
It takes a smart woman to know how to pass on the message without hurting their ego
Trust me
If your man acted like a woman, you wouldn't like it.[/quote]I guess you have a point about all this. Like seriously. . . . i don't think im cut out for marriage. Im just too headstrong and what have you for it. I like being control and I don't want to be second hand.

joshjosh:
i think one major problem this generation has is many are coming from broken homes or homes with step this step that relationships that takes ages to explain.  if you come from a home where you saw love and all this non rocket science respect and give and take here and there all this queenisha is saying here will not sound allien.

we all need God and His love to help us prefer our partners more than ourselves.  our natural flesh and mr and mrs flesh always only love itself and no other.

WTF!!! Like seriously. First off. . . . i don't come from a broken family, thank you very much. And second off, i am subjecting to my own beliefs and just because it doesn't abide by what you were taught to believe doesn't mean you go and tell me I have step this and step that.

[quote author=Gucci_Babe link=topic=173975.msg2834441#msg2834441 date=1222041455]Understanble.  Us Nigerians know how stressfull it is when you are being pressured by your parents to get married, and it looks like  somethig you "Have to do" no matter what,
i feel  you,   its so hard to know that there is no more you.  adapting to who you are not is a lot of work!  mehn!!! what about the family, the feelings, sex and all those thing that has to be put in place. its so   [/quote]Even though i have time before i think of marriage. . . . . i seriously don't think im cut out for it.