mrjojo:
can you expatiate more on this please? with a scenario if possible, and how do you raise kids in this environment? if you as an adult is subtly made aware of your blackness, and it can sometimes be draining , how do you prepare your kids for this? and also been wealthy and physical attribute(height, fit, cute) can also be a "redemption "

My experience with what the OP described was during my time as a student. During group work, and also during internships working with other interns. So from a professional setting, I don't have it, since I run my own business and have formulated my life in ways that those nonsense have no place in it.

Then, we can all be in a group, but unbeknown to me, they share a subgroup where they do things without the awareness of those they deem undesirables.

And it's also not clear-cut racial. Their so-called clique can have a minority in it, also referred to as ''token black person'', to give it a multiracial flare, but the token minority in the group is a beech in that group. He has to lose his self-respect to fit in.

So you might also be facing disenfranchisement from the in-group black person, which may annoy you further because you may be expecting solidarity based on race. But mind you, the token person suffers, he just hides it.

As for kids, it's mostly bullying, and the above doesn't apply, but Western schools are increasingly becoming accepting and multicultural, so black kids don't feel left behind, and in many cases, black kids are novelty, and the love of the town. It is not always a bad story.

As for redemption based on physical attributes, it's a two-way thing. It can also be a source of jealousy. A short white racist guy will not treat you better because you are taller, instead, your presence will boost his insecurities.

The only redemption is not to play like I said earlier, and operate from a position of strength. So do not need anything from them, and know your turf very well. Be smart as hell. After they finish fooling themselves with their cliques, they all know that you're a boss on your own, and you only relate with them out of courtesy, not necessity.

If you understand female biology, you will be angry at God for not giving you a clitoris.

The sexual pleasure that things give women, I don't think a man can comprehend it, after all, he will never experience it.

That Ctoris is the single unfair sexual advantage women have over men. The orgasm that comes from that place eh? walahi its unfair.

Silentgroper:
is kissing on the mouth that important .. I mean kissing me on the cheek or forehead would but which one be mouth ...

Btw, you just might be right..

Make I spoil your mood small

There are more bacteria in the mouth than in the anus. Yes, you heard that right. The misconception that bacteria are infested in dirty places is always not true.

Everything that goes out of your anus enters through your mouth. The tongue is the dirtiest part of a human's body.

So if you don't like kissing for health reasons, you probably are correct. And if you prefer to kiss the anus instead of the lips, you are probably healthier than those who kiss through the mouth lol

FreeSpirited:
Plan a fake travel or conference together with ur wife...tell them ur family have to travel....they should have sense with this scope and fly out of ur life. Ur wife has to support u on this or else it won't work...
.
2nd scope is to tell them directly that, your ability to take full responsibility of the house is becoming unbearable in this hard economy that ur earnings can not support more than 2 mouths at the moment coupled with expensive baby food, that u are resorting to borrow.......If u can do this second trips... they will respect ur manliness or boldness and won't take u for granted cos they know u wont take rubbish.

3rd scope......If the above 2 don't work,,,,,,then reduce the quality of food they cook and eat drastically...This scope is a silent scope....u dont need to explain to ur wife, just cook a fake story of how u no longer have enough cash...maybe work related or project related...make ur wife believe the fake story....
.
E.g if they use fish for stew, cut it to only egg.....reduce soup to once a week or once in two weeks....let them eat more of beans( give them garri with the beans instead of dodo+bread) cook vegetables soup without meat, instead use Shawa fish...lol....this may cause quarell with ur wife,,,don't shy away from the quarrel, infact welcome it and use the avenue to voice out on ur wife so that everyone will hear ur complain of lack of fund and have sense.....
.
Economy is hard, they are using u to chop free food..... ...u have to be smart or die in silence

He should do number two. Why lie?

Tell them straight up that they are a burden on your family and they should leave. If them vex, that's their problem. Every person have a right to dump unwarranted burden as he deem fit.

Silentgroper:
I've got no fear for it. It just feels awkward and ignites no passion in me ..

All the while she was doing it .. my mind was just like "Wtf" ... She was getting intense with it, I was just there doing nothing waiting for her to finish .. I felt her tongue and this mild nausea almost engulfed me ..

Omoh French kissing go really make me puke oo ..

You don't like her, that's why.

This is common when you are horney, but not into the person in front of you. Its why prostitutes don't kiss their client. Shew will be like, ''just nack me and get out jare''. Lol

For those who don't understand what the OP is saying, let me put in another way.

There is racial hierarchy the world is built upon, and most Africans who haven't left Africa don't know about it. Ngozi Chimamanda spoke about being aware she is black after she left Nigeria. She never knew it was a thing.

You might not know about it, but the world will show you where they think you belong, and it can be dehumanizing if you don't know how to navigate these terrains.

It's like how a bank manager may single out a millionaire standing in the queue, even if you all are customers. Or in a church, the big boys hang out with themselves, forming cliques.

You never thought your poverty could be used against you, after all, you didn't bother anyone with it. it's the same for race. I am black, but I didn't trouble you with my blackness, so why this treatment?

The best way to navigate such a scenario is not to play. You can only lose if you play. Just be in the group if you have to be there, but be mute, don't view their comments, mute the chat, and only respond and reply where it is NECESSARY.

Don't exit the group, to avoid giving a wrong impression, but you need to operate overtly since they are also operating overtly. You act like you don't know their game, and when they hope to catch and beat you somewhere, you are not there.

But make sure you are good at whatever you do, your competence is your redemption. Let them feel superior, or disenfranchise you from whatever, but when they are done operating in deceit, they will know deep down that you are good, and them no reach.

icenti:


Mumu

I happy say na you reply am. Be like say him dey eye your 2500 USD

This is why being straightforward pays. You might sound harsh, but people will know where you stand, and your mind will be less burdensome.

Only negotiate with someone that also has a stake, or carries equally your responsibilities.

Even if your wife starts feeding them, probably it would be from your money, and also, you are paying for the house I assume, and also, the inconveniences.

How tough are you? Can you ask them about their plans on leaving? Your questions should make them feel uncomfortable staying longer.

If they didn't give a tangible answer, then tell them to leave. Don't respect people that do not respect themselves. Any self-respecting human knows when he has overstayed his welcome. If they don't know, its not your problem.

You carry the load, and you have the right to dump the load, especially loads that does not serve you.

Silentgroper is suffering from philemaphobia. sorry

Haaa, that beans with a strong smell, that is used to make ofada sauce (ayamase). You get mind chop that thing in large quantity. Damn

What you wrote seems logical, but there is no wisdom in it.

If men operate on the mindset of the women you described, then there would be no more committed relationships, and at best, women will be sex objects.

Or baby factory, where a man will marry her, make babies with her, and dump her for a younger, less jaded woman. Two can play this game. Men can be cruel too.

Men's refusal to operate on the jungle law should be a testament to their virtue, not a sign of being ripe for exploitation or being a mumu.

And if a woman leaves you for a richer man, then be happy that she left.

Feel sorry for the man who has privatised a gold-digger, and if he knows about her monkey-branching and still keeps her, he is an idiot and deserves whatever she brings.

Propaganda.

The west have lost any shot at truth or legitimacy. I don't believe anything from that source, and their slaves like the poster.

descarado:

I replied you thinking your post was logical. My bad.
Social media is awesome.
It has made so many act as demigod and judges.

The egotistical nature of a Nigerian man will always manifest. Even those who depend on women for daily need.

The court is all yours

The price you pay for frolicking with people without character (weak people) is that you will punished for it.

Iron sharpens iron, but wood blunts an iron. Weak people will only punish, not reward your good deeds. It is a natural law. Try to save an injured snake, and it will bite you. The snake's mind is too dull to reward your good deeds.

I don't know how you will do it, but if you will help people, either a friend or babe in any way, make sure you can attest to their character and values, otherwise, your good deed will be seen as idiocy, and their betrayal seen as them been smart.

I will only respect this man if he can come out honestly and tell Nigerians the truth, which is that he is the gatekeeper of Western hegemony in the country, and Nigeria is still a British colony.

That the independence they got in 1960 is false, and just a mere transition from a dying method of colonialism to a more sophisticated, self-sustaining, well-hidden method of exploitation, aka, imperialism.

That our future will be worse than the present, and the good times that Nigerians will ever know will be in their memories of the past. That our current political method will not lead Nigeria out of this mess or to the promised land, since it was imposed by the British.

If he didn't say anything that resembles the above, then in my view, he is still doing the works of his masters.

descarado:

It's a circle.
We a gradually going back to this, believe me.

I have gowns like these.
Watch Nigerian movies and see that these are returning back.

Even afro wig is more on the rise now.
Most women like 70% rock natural hair.
They just use wig to cover it as it's mostly difficult to tame.

That hair style is jerry curl.

The ones that will gradually go back are those that are mature already and have experienced the corruption, then they learn and find out there is no gain there.

But after such repentance, they have lost the value men held in high esteem. There will always be consequences to our actions, that even repentance will not save us from.

It is like telling a promising young man to wife a prostitute because she has repented. Most men won't. They will applaud her repentance though. Prevention will always be better than cure.

Furthermore, modern culture is like a strong tide that is difficult to swim against. Most impressionable young girls will first get corrupted, and the number of the ones getting corrupted is like a tsunami to the ones who didn't.

The channel to be discreetly corrupt is in our hands (smartphones). I respect any woman who can resist the urge not to participate in corruption. The temptation to show their ass via manipulatory poses on social media is so strong, I see even Christian women doing it.

You don marry? otherwise, accept my condolence

davidhobo:



Hehehehe..hunger na hin go khee u here o.

Na only Runz girls full here, those are the ones you can access. They dont have money, just enough for skimpy clothes.

The women that have money, you cant even access them. You only see them drive by in flashy cars, you cant go to their offices or homes, and you wont even be able to meet them in churches either.

Abuja is by connect and network,.someone must hold you by the hand and drsg along into a place, clique or gathering.

Perhaps in conferences amd exhibitions only, you can meet women who.have luxuty taste. But, problem is-you/yourself cant even be near those places, you wont even know such events held at Transcorp or Sheraton till you watch the highlights on TV.

Where do you intend to set up shop by way?

You can come and sell okrika or OK or used clothes in maraba, nyanyan, kubwa, one man village, dei dei, to women and you will see good money, but luxury items?

Which luxury item you wan come from Calabar come sell Abuja woman? Alhaji wife wey dey go Dubai every week? Or Senator girlfriend wey dey go Malay? Or women who have contacts in Lagos and Joburg?

You go trek tire,o,. Maraba, Nyanyan, Kubwa, Gwagwalada na hin sure for u pass

No joy

StreetFight:


Na so una dey cover drugs traffickers and baby factory merchants in your region

1 + 1 = ?

A time when decency was the ultimate sophistication.

Sorry for the man stressing himself over a woman who is making herself easy for the man she truly likes.

EmperorCaesar:
Keep deceiving yourself

Its still as it used to be, maybe a few are now more stoic in their approach to women, but a larger percentage of Nigerian men are still thirsty and obsessive psychos around their women and it wont get better anytime soon as Nigerian women knows how best to condition and control these men into what they want them to be

They are not Nigerian women

topatee:

You have never been in such a situation, that's why you dey yarn, (or maybe you are like her ), some girls can be impossible especially for a man struggling to make the ends meet for his family. When the man divorce her now, una go beging talk nonsence.

Oya explain to me how putting your wife's fault online solves anything. How it will make her change, respect you and love you

pharmagba:

I disagree with you
Had it been they are in Nigeria I may agree but in Europe who will ever talk to them that they will hear!
They become lords unto themselves especially like this one the man married that brings nothing to the table thinking it is her private part that is most important to a man.

This video could be the saving grace that will recalibrate her brain and her attitude in her marriage.

Explain to me how putting such a video online solves anything.

Willed042:

You guys just yawn nonsense atimes. I guess u are single. Do u know how many times the man could have been trying speaking senses to her about her inherent habits. Most of this girls of nowadays are very dirty. House chores they can't do. Food no...only g choping and be online 24 hours daily.

Oya explain to me how videoing her fault for the world to see solves the issue.

HellVictorinho6:


Noise in my head

Plus so much stress


Av tried paracetamol,pain reliever, even malaria drugs.


I dont know whether 2 continue with the paracetamol


Am just tired

What i will eat is another problem

See if you can sell your strength and time. So stand on a busy market and refer customers to vendors. Then they give you your cut. This one needs zero capital to start.

Look for a busy place in your area, make things that are cheap to produce, such as zobo, and tiger nut, plantain chips, etc, mount a table, and sell it. Just to get started, and be eating and earning. It will also help you avoid boredom that will make you think and think.

See if you can sell your strength and time. So stand on a busy market and refer customers to vendors. Then they give you your cut. This one needs zero capital to start.

Look for a busy place in your area, make things that are cheap to produce, such as zobo, and tiger nut, plantain chips, etc, mount a table, and sell it. Just to get started, and be eating and earning. It will also help you avoid boredom that will make you think and think.

See this man o.

Making a video to disgrace his wife, but ends up proving that he doesn't have sense. She is your wife. You don't make a video to disgrace her. Solve your issues without a camera.

All he just did is give strangers the license to insult his wife, the mother of his kids, and a woman he has sworn to be one with.

LordAdam16:


I get the sense that the West is more conservative than their election results and liberal policies suggest.
But their elite go to great lengths to rein in conservatism.
For the most part, they're extraordinarily successful at this.
However, occasionally, there are these spurts like the recent EU parliamentary elections that sort of pull the curtains back a little.

-Lord

That is very true.

It's not far-fetched if you consider facts such as Western demographics, hot topics such as immigration, LGBT, and the lack of unison of opposing entities within the bloc.

Western demography is quite old, and old people in general tend to be conservatives. Also, liberal people tend to be conservatives as they get older. Liberalism thrives in lack of depth, and someone else will pay the price, not you.

Liberal folks that support open-door immigration policies for example usually tilt towards conservatism when immigrants start committing crimes, won't integrate and rape becomes rampant.

Liberalism sees the good and positive in things/people, minus the dark part of it. Aka refugee needs help, lets open our homes for them, which sounds good, but conservatives would prefer that the root cause for migration be solved, so they stay in their homes.

Specifically about the EU, the bloc is fed up and depressed. In anonymous channels such as forums, one can read the minds of Europeans and how they feel about different issues.

Many of them, even the young ones are tilting towards conservatism in opinion in mass, because they see clearly that liberalism of the past hasn't done any good.

Take London and Brussels for example, these capitals' demographics have been changed for life. There are more non Ethnic British people in London, and there are more non-Ethnic Belgians in Brussels.

It was liberal policies that changed all these, and Europeans are really powerless, you see their anger through the voting poll, where they vote in leaders that will reverse it, like the Netherlands and Geert Wilders

LordAdam16:


Talking about the EU parliamentary elections.
What are your thoughts about the results?

-Lord

Honestly, I don't know. I didn't follow up.

I quickly did some research about it, and don't have any data to give any concrete opinion.

What do you think about it though?