₦airaland Forum

lol.. this one is strong o



Yoruba adage be like - gbaya gbaya ojebi Aya Eni ni ka bawi

meaning in nutshell

wife snatcher isn't at fault na ur wife u go caution

hmmm

k, I love u sir how I wish u av full autonomy when u dey there











note- Nigeria's wealth is more than enough for all Nigerians but is not enough for the greediness of our politicians


note :- am responsible for what I say nd u re responsible for what u understand





on the contrary
� Fenerbahce vs Besiktas
� 11 yellow cards
� 5 red cards
⚽ 3 goals
� 2 penalties
�� The Istanbul Derby
*_Ex Madrid Pepe played 90mins in a game that registered 11 yellow cards and 5 red cards but he (Pepe) was never booked_*
Isn't this a sign, the end of the world is near ��

Boltam:
beautiful write up...i cannot be suffering all my life to prove that am a wife material

yes beautiful write

but the op steal am ni

Florblu:
Brilliant write up
But I think what brought about the shaming is because of some girls that sees being in a relationship or married is an opportunity to escape poverty.
To whom much is given much is expected.

Boltam:
beautiful write up...i cannot be suffering all my life to prove that am a wife material

yes beautiful write

but the op steal am ni










https://www.nairaland.com/4072818/wife-material

Tasued:
The wife material

The other day, there was no water in my hostel, so, I went outside to fetch. Now, I have very fragile bones, I can't be messing with my arms, I decided it would be safer if I put the keg of water on my head(advantage of having a big head, shey?). Well, I found someone and together, we balanced the keg on my head. Some dude saw me and sent me a message afterwards saying: Keji, you're a wife material o. If it were to be other girls, they would be forming.
Me (feigning ignorance): what did Keji do o?
Him: I saw the way you put keg of water on your head nah
Me: In your mind now, you would be thinking you're making sense o. Mtchew...
************************

Why does our society still justify a good wife qualities by the amount of suffering she passes through?
Ideally, with the level of civilization the world is experiencing, someone in Africa is thinking a woman is a better wife material because she can put keg of water on her head. Is suffering synonymous to being a wife?
A girl says she doesn't like grinding stone, you shame her for it, a girl says she likes using washing machine, you shame her for it. A girl says she doesn't like pounding yam, you shame her for it. You see, with my level of education and all the stress I am passing through in school right now just to be successful in life, if I cannot afford to make like easier for myself, if I cannot afford a blender, a washing machine, a pounding machine, then, I would be a disgrace to myself, to my family, and to my struggle!
I've read stories of how a man 'tested' his fiance by asking her to sleep in kitchen and she obeyed and he was convinced he could marry her... ... An argument was on on social media few weeks ago saying a woman that cannot cook soup with 500 naira is not a good wife material, so, I ask, how many of you men can build a duplex with 10,000 naira? Would you date dangote's daughter and be testing her with Poverty? You see, some ladies know what they want in life, it is not pride, it is not gold digging, it is called standard. Test a rich lady with Poverty and watch her leave you, not everyone can cope with Poverty.
I have heard a pastor say if his son brings a lady home, he will pack all his dirty clothes outside and if the lady doesn't come to wash them, his son will not marry her. In my mind, I was like, daddy, you will marry your son at last, sir. Whose daughter do you want to turn to your slave? Y'all want to be pampered and your egos massaged by ladies but you keep testing someone's daughter with Poverty and ill treatment and expect her to stay with you. You will be alright at last.
Keep judging a good wife with how well she can absorb Poverty and suffering and Poverty and suffering will keep following you, since that is what you want.
Please, a good wife is someone who will love and support you not necessarily someone who can put up with Poverty and stress.
Yes, we know our mothers suffered, used grinding stones, went to the river, pounded yam and all. But this is the life of baby girls, we have the money and sense to make life comfortable for ourselves, stop shaming girls who seek comfort. Except you have the ambition to be poor, you should have no reason compulsorily searching for a lady who can cook soup with 500 naira.

Oga y would u copy this post without reference


fear God o

how I wish people understand the fact that Russia and China are looking for any slight opportunity to clear people's emotion and doubt on US

Desyner:
OP is defense lawyer for ølò$hô$ and lazy people.

lol.....

but come to think of it



Make beds of Roses for your wife when and where u can . They are someone's daughter.
If God provides for you why should you test his creature given to you on trust with poverty.

?


am not saying endurance and perseverance should be left out but if u av the money to foot d bill please y not?

newyorks:
u'ah safe but the op is a feminist

but I think she is right to a larger extent

newyorks:
finally u vented ur anger and impression on nl? :-(

is this all you av to say
hmmm

Evaberry:
hmm.

newyorks:
finally u vented ur anger and impression on nl? :-(

is this all you av to say
hmmm
are we save madam?

*The wife material*

The other day, there was no water in my hostel, so, I went outside to fetch. Now, I have very fragile bones, I can't be messing with my arms, I decided it would be safer if I put the keg of water on my head(advantage of having a big head, shey?). Well, I found someone and together, we balanced the keg on my head. Some dude saw me and sent me a message afterwards saying: Keji, you're a wife material o. If it were to be other girls, they would be forming.
Me (feigning ignorance): what did Keji do o?
Him: I saw the way you put keg of water on your head nah
Me: In your mind now, you would be thinking you're making sense o. Mtchew...
************************

Why does our society still justify a good wife qualities by the amount of suffering she passes through?
Ideally, with the level of civilization the world is experiencing, someone in Africa is thinking a woman is a better wife material because she can put keg of water on her head. Is suffering synonymous to being a wife?
A girl says she doesn't like grinding stone, you shame her for it, a girl says she likes using washing machine, you shame her for it. A girl says she doesn't like pounding yam, you shame her for it. You see, with my level of education and all the stress I am passing through in school right now just to be successful in life, if I cannot afford to make like easier for myself, if I cannot afford a blender, a washing machine, a pounding machine, then, I would be a disgrace to myself, to my family, and to my struggle!
I've read stories of how a man 'tested' his fiance by asking her to sleep in kitchen and she obeyed and he was convinced he could marry her... Oya, gbefun������... An argument was on on social media few weeks ago saying a woman that cannot cook soup with 500 naira is not a good wife material, so, I ask, how many of you men can build a duplex with 10,000 naira? Would you date dangote's daughter and be testing her with Poverty? You see, some ladies know what they want in life, it is not pride, it is not gold digging, it is called standard. Test a rich lady with Poverty and watch her leave you, not everyone can cope with Poverty.
I have heard a pastor say if his son brings a lady home, he will pack all his dirty clothes outside and if the lady doesn't come to wash them, his son will not marry her. In my mind, I was like, daddy, you will marry your son at last, sir. Whose daughter do you want to turn to your slave? Y'all want to be pampered and your egos massaged by ladies but you keep testing someone's daughter with Poverty and ill treatment and expect her to stay with you. You will be alright at last.
Keep judging a good wife with how well she can absorb Poverty and suffering and Poverty and suffering will keep following you, since that is what you want.
Please, a good wife is someone who will love and support you not necessarily someone who can put up with Poverty and stress.
Yes, we know our mothers suffered, used grinding stones, went to the river, pounded yam and all. But this is the life of baby girls, we have the money and sense to make life comfortable for ourselves, stop shaming girls who seek comfort. Except you have the ambition to be poor, you should have no reason compulsorily searching for a lady who can cook soup with 500 naira.

*MORENIKEJI NIGHTINGALE*

hmmmm these are serious cases o



lalasticala

are they OK? this are Nigeria friendly now

abeg how I fit ship am in go sell scrap for asomenta ooooo na money be this o

Thursday, September 21, 2017
OPPOSITION TO SUKUK: CAN IS PLAYING ‘DOG IN THE MANGER’
21st September, 2017
PRESS RELEASE:
OPPOSITION TO SUKUK: CAN IS PLAYING ‘DOG IN THE MANGER’

The Christian Association of Nigeria (CAN) issued a press statement yesterday to protest against the Federal Government’s first ever
sukuk (noninterest lease assets facilities) which was announced last week. The statement which was dated 19th September, 2017
was signed by CAN’s General Secretary, Rev. Dr. Musa Asake.
The Muslim Rights Concern (MURIC) considers CAN’s position demeaning. It is not only infantile, petty and overbearing but also
spiteful and egocentric.

Our position is based on the fact that CAN has all it needs in Nigeria today because the whole system is Christo-Western: education,
the judicial system, the economy, everything. Muslims who were deprived of all their Islamic landmarks and ways of life by the
colonialists are constrained to start the struggle all over again by demanding Shari’ah, use of hijab in schools, Islamic banks, sukuk,
etc. It must be made clear ab initio that Nigerian Muslims had all these before the advent of the British colonialists who changed
everything in favour of Christianity.

There is nothing the Muslims are demanding now that the Christians don’t have already on a platter of gold. It must also be stated
that the Christians do not need the things that the Muslims are asking for. Why should somebody keep blocking his brother from
getting his own share when he already has his own?

The fable of the dog in the manger is quite didactic in this regard. A British dog in the 13th century was fed with meat until its belly
was full. Then the owner took hay (dry grass which only the horse needed and it is useless to the dog) and gave it to the horse. The
dog had eaten and it was now the horse’s turn. Surprisingly, the dog started barking. It jumped on the hay and kept the horse at
bay.

‘Dog in the manger’ has since become an English idiom. We must now ask CAN why it is playing dog in the manger. Shari‘ah is not
for them but CAN screamed until the roofs nearly came down. OIC does not hurt any Christian but CAN shouted to high heavens.
Hijab is for female Muslims alone but violent envy pushed CAN to shout itself hoarse. Islamic bank is for Muslims alone but CAN
labeled it Islamisation of Nigeria. Can CAN give us a list of those who have been Islamised since Islamic banking started in the
country? CAN leadership has become a professional false alarmist, a dog in the manger.

To reject the existence of sukuk pari passu with Islamic banking is like demanding that the agricultural sector should operate without
bringing harvests to the markets or that hospitals should exist without pharmacies and laboratories. Having fought rigorously and
bitterly against the establishment of the Islamic bank in Nigeria without success, our Christian neighbours seek to strangulate Islamic
banks in the country.

We are constrained to ask, “How Christian is the Christian Association of Nigeria?” Every good Christian wants to be like Jesus and
he turns this idea of emulating Jesus to a song. We have no doubt that CAN leaders also sing the song. But how sincere are they
about emulating Jesus? Jesus says, “Love your neighbour according to thy self” (Mark 12:31) but CAN leaders do the exact opposite.
There are lots of good Christians in Nigeria and we interact very well but why must the petty ones always lead them? They are a
belligerent lot, warlike and aggressive. Have they ever seen Muslims opposing a benefit going to Christians? We did not protest when
you started going to Jerusalem even though we know that it is not mandatory for Christians. You enjoy Western banking system,
Western education, common law, etc without any protest from us. Why is it that CAN always cries foul each time we seek parity?
CAN’s claim that sukuk is unconstitutional is false, baseless and misleading. How can laws made by the Federal Government be ultra
vires? CAN is misleading Nigerian Christians. CAN should know what to do if it is unconstitutional. We challenge CAN to go to court
today. It should not wait till tomorrow.

This was how CAN deceived Nigerians in 1999 when it said Shariah was unconstitutional and MURIC challenged it to go to court.
They went to court of course but they beat a quick retreat. They withdrew the case when they found out the truth. But why heat up
the polity all the time when you have the means of finding out the true status of sukuk? CAN likes making noise and we are enjoying
our garrulous neighbour.

CAN calls sukuk a sectional religious financial policy but it forgets that the stock exchange has hitherto been monopolized by
Christian-oriented bonds for decades and the Muslims did not complain for once. CAN loves to permanently marginalize Nigerian
Muslims yet it is CAN that shouts ‘Islamisation’.

If it is true that sukuk implies Islamisation, then the stock exchange is imperialistic Christianisation. But almost the whole of Europe
has embraced the sukuk industry. This includes France, Germany, Italy, Ireland, Luxemburg and Britain. Paris EUROPLACE established
sukuk as far back as 2007 and France has since established the Islamic Finance Commission. Germany issued its first sukuk in 2004.
That was 13 years ago. Ireland’s sukuk assets amounted to 180 trillion euros by 2010. Luxemburg started using sukuk in 2002.
Britain has been using Islamic banking since the 1990s and the Sanctuary Building Sukuk was launched in 2005. The United States
Office of the Comptroller of the Currency recognized the ijarah and mubarahah more than 30 years ago! But has America been
Islamised? According to Bloomberg LP, KFH Research, the global sukuk issuance as at 31st December 2013 was $135 billion but
grew rapidly to $2.004 trillion by 2016.

These are verifiable facts if CAN would eschew its armchair leadership style. Even Google alone is enough but CAN leadership will not
search. They are just interested in rabble-rousing and cantankerous razz-mataz. CAN should seek education. The Bible says “My
people perish for lack of knowledge” (Hosea 4:6). CAN should stop misleading Nigerians and inciting Christians against their Muslim
neighbours.

MURIC calls on Nigerian Christians to either ignore CAN or find out the truth by themselves each time CAN cries wolf. Afterall the
Bible asks Christians to “Investigate everything but hold onto that which is the truth” (I Thessalonians 5:21). Don’t allow anybody to
push you into violent behavior. Don’t allow anyone to make you hate your Muslim neighbour.
Let us eschew primordial sentiments. Sukuk is purely business. We advise Christians to take their destiny in their own hands instead
of allowing warlike leaders to lead them into unnecessary confrontation with Muslims every time. We invite CAN leaders to eschew
bitterness. We should be partners in lending the voice of reason to the national debate instead of constituting clerical nuisance to the
Nigerian nation.


Before we round up, we advise CAN leadership to desist from giving religion a bad name. The word ‘religion’ is from the Latin word
‘religio’ meaning ‘to link’, ‘to tie’ or ‘to bind’. Therefore religion is about linking people together in love and sharing. It is not about
dividing them. Religion is about love, forgiveness, tolerance, giving and taking. Let us be good examples for the young generation.
Our constant bickering has led to too many religious crises. It has pushed our followers to the precipice of war and instigated them
against one another. Why must we live together like two envious wives of the same husband when we should see ourselves as two
sons of the same father? This is the etymological essence of religion.


Professor Ishaq Akintola,
President,
Muslim Rights Concern (MURIC)

WhiteSoup:
But they does not knows the financers of the boko haram but they knows the financers of ipob that is France and France say they does not understand what the inefectual kunu drinker told lie Mohamed to tell the whole wide world as his information minister and spokes man

Confusion government full of people what cannot even speak queens english accusing France of thier stupidity!

ur English self

he said they get most of their finance from France (people contribute towards d agitation mostly from France) nt France govt

olaolu39:
Lol.. Im just a freelancer.. I dont work for them, but i know them since i was undergraduate

lol.... OK just curious with d details given ni

Yampotatocarrot:
Would b better if I was, don't u think? I even had to call Olaolu today to ask about them

Yampotatocarrot:
Would b better if I was, don't u think? I even had to call Olaolu today to ask about them

Oga take am easy, y re u sounding frustrated haba, which kain statement is "don't I think"

am meant to quote olaolu nt u and my comment is a question not an insult..... abeg tk am easy oga I no be ur junior brother now

Yampotatocarrot:
Would b better if I was, don't u think? I even had to call Olaolu today to ask about them

Oga take am easy, y re u sounding frustrated haba, which kain statement is "don't I think"

am meant to quote olaolu nt u and my comment is a question not an insult..... abeg tk am easy oga

are u sure u re nt working for the tutorial?

olaolu39:
Greymatters is not in any way affliated to the school. They are only helping hands in delivering people out of failure through tutorials. They might have gotten your contacts through an internal staff by sharing unilag database to them.

Goodluck.

are u sure u re nt working for the tutorial?

we discussed why you urgently NEED to stop backbiting. In this part, we discuss some practical tips to actually help you stop, and help you deal when others are backbiting in front of you.

If You Are The One Backbiting, What To Do?

Beg Allah for Help. Beg Allah desperately to save you from this sin. Make Dua to Allah to enable you to control your tongue. No one can progress in this path without the help of Allah. Remember and remember and remember “You alone we worship, and You alone we ask for help,” we repeat 17 times a day in Surat Al Fatiha. So do your part of asking Allah for Help as He commanded. WAllahi if you ask Allah sincerely to purify you from this, He will help you and will heal you from this and replace it with light in your heart and peace in your life. So Ask Allah. This is The MOST IMPORTANT STEP. Ask Allah sincerely.
Whenever you feel tempted to say something bad against someone, remind yourself that if there is something wrong with them, there is something even worse with YOU for you are the one who is bringing out the ugliness in others and spreading them. Even if this person is flawed, you bringing out the flaw could lead to your own flaws being exposed in front of all mankind if Allah willed it. So fear Allah.
It was narrated from Abu Hurairah that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said:

“Whoever covers (the sin of) a Muslim, Allah will cover him (his sin) in this world and in the Hereafter.” [Sunan Ibn Majah]

We should be eager and actually compete in hiding the faults of others, not exposing them.

I remember clearly a lady who was speaking to her relative and then telling her “but your sister is fat. You’re beautiful and in good shape. But your sister is fat.” I swear to God, within a month or so, this lady got a disease which led her to take medication that has cortisone and it made her really oddly fat! It was very strange subhaAllah that this lady became so fat so quick out of nowhere. So, don’t mess with people! Allah hears you and every word has its consequences.
You may be messing with someone that Allah loves, and Allah says: “Whosoever shows enmity to a wali (friend) of Mine, then I have declared war against him.”

So don’t get yourself into this. Fear Allah and don’t harm His slaves, these are His slaves, no matter how much you dislike them, they are His. You may be harming yourself or preventing your rizq or covering yourself with unnecessary sadness as a result of this without you even knowing or paying attention…. sins have consequences.

Now, if you really don’t like someone and this leads you to talk about them…etc, then thank you, but please keep your opinion for yourself inside your mouth, don’t bring it out, the world doesn’t need it. What you can do instead is this: Ask Allah to replace whatever bad things you don’t like about this person with something better. Make dua for them, ask Allah to give them guidance and light and love from His love so you and others may love them too. And you are the winner when you do that because: 1- Angels will make the same dua for you 2- you have turned the ugly feelings you have into worship and earned yourself rewards instead of sins.
What to do if you have done backbiting already?
If you have done this, then you have to hurry up and do Istighfar and tawba, if you know the person you’ve backbitten, then either go apologize, or if he doesn’t know you’ve done that, then don’t tell him but do good to him in the same place and with the same people you’ve backbitten him with. Also do istighfar for him.

Example: if you have backbitten Sarah with Mona, then go tell Mona good things about Sarah and say that you regret speaking badly about her.  If you’ve spoken badly about someone in a platform, use the same platform to bring them their right back as much as you can, while doing sincere tawbah and istighfar.

If Someone Is Backbiting In Front Of You, What To Do?

Single. Time. Anyone says something bad about someone else, IMMEDIATELY say something good about this same person. Keep doing that until those who backbite hate talking to you/or backbiting around you.
Here is an example:

Them:  “This girl is too loud. She gets on my nerves.”

You: “Oh subhanAllah, I really feel she is very sincere in wanting to bring her point across. May Allah accept from her and guide her to the best in this life and the next. Ameen.”

— (You see how you turned them off from further backbiting? Keep doing that!)

Another scenario:

Them: “I wanted to tell you something?”

You: “Does it involve talking about someone by name, or referring to them clearly that I would know who they are?”

Them: “Maybe”.

You: “Then, please, may Allah reward you, I don’t want to know.”

Them: “But I’m not saying anything wrong. I just wanted to tell you a story that really happened. I don’t mean anything.”

You: “I know may Allah reward you. You’re amazing. But please I do not want to talk about anyone in their absence. I really don’t want to know this story. Thank you.”  Then change the subject and talk about anything else.

Simple.

Just kill the backbiting before it evolves.

It only evolves because you accepted it and allowed it to evolve.

Have strength and pride in your religion and its beautiful teachings that guide us to what’s pure and forbid us from what’s harmful. You don’t have to be weak and submit to people when they are doing something wrong.
Change the subject.

Talk about the person in a very good way instead until they stop.

Tell them you will leave. Go sit somewhere else.

Wear a T-Shirt/sticker that’s says: “I don’t backbite and I like it”

There are so many ways. Be creative, save yourself and others from this sin. Jannah is worth it, and the major consequences that come out of this sin in this life and the next deserve fighting against them with all your heart, mind and creativity.

Final comment: by Allah, this act of backbiting brings nothing but ugliness, sadness and darkness to you without you even knowing. I have seen this with my own eyes. If you are frustrated and you start backbiting thinking this will calm you down or take away your frustration, then I swear by Allah that this will only add to your frustration and worsen the situation and bring a dull gloomy feeling to you and everyone involved in backbiting with you. It is never the solution. There is no way that a sin that automatically comes with darkness would bring you light, ease and healing into your life. No way. So get yourself out of this mess. You’re better than this, and with the help of Allah and your free access to speak to Him about anything whenever you want, you really don’t need to indulge in talking about other people.

May Allah help us and make us among those who set things right, and call to righteousness. Ameen.



http://hadithoftheday.com/how-to-get-rid-of-backbiting-once-and-for-all-part-ii/

This is a sin that people take so lightly and commit so easily, but it’s in fact one of the major sins that have grave consequences in this life, in the grave and in the hereafter!

So what is backbiting exactly?

Abu Hurairah (RAA) narrated, ‘The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) asked, “Do you know what backbiting is?” They replied, `Allah and His Messenger (ﷺ) know best.’ He said, “It is saying something about your brother which he dislikes.” Someone asked, ‘Supposing that what I said about my brother was true?’ and the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said:

“If what you say about him is true you have backbitten him and if it is not true you have slandered him.” [Related by Muslims.]

But why do we need to get rid of this sin?

This sin is a reflection of having diseases in the heart. Allah Almighty wants to purify us from sins as sins are darkness and we cannot approach or see the Full Light of Allah when we are buried in darkness. We do not approach the Beauty of Allah with the ugliness of our hearts. Remember, a sound purified heart is our ultimate goal and salvation.

“The Day when there will not benefit [anyone] wealth or children

But only one who comes to Allah with a sound heart.” (Qur’an 26: 88-89)

So, we are now going to understand why backbiting (gheeba) specifically is a big sin, how we can stop it, and what to do when someone is backbiting in front of us.

Why Is Backbiting Such A Big Deal?

Those little words we are uttering mindlessly thinking they are not a big deal are in fact considered by the scholars among the major sins and they could lead to punishment in the grave and punishment in the hereafter.
Anas (May Allah be pleased with him) said:

The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “During the Mi’raj (the Night of Ascension), I saw a group of people who were scratching their chests and faces with their copper nails. I asked, ‘Who are these people, O Jibril?’ Jibril replied: ‘These are the people who ate flesh of others (by backbiting) and trampled people’s honour.”‘ [Abu Dawud].

Also…

It was narrated that Ibn ‘ Abbas said:

“The Messenger of Allah passed by two graves and said: “They are being punished but they are not being punished for anything that was difficult to avoid. One of them used not to take care to avoid getting urine on his body or clothes, and the other used to walk about spreading gossip.’ Then he took a fresh palm stalk and broke it in half, and planted one half on each grave. They said: ‘O Messenger of Allah, why did not do that?’ He said: ‘May it be reduced for them so long as this does not dry out.”‘ [Sunan an-Nasa’i]

Those little words we are uttering could easily transfer the reward of our good deeds we worked day and night to earn to the person we’ve spoken about, or give us his/her evil deeds on the Day of Judgment, and what a major loss  that would be!!
Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported:

The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “He who has done a wrong affecting his brother’s honour or anything else, let him ask his forgiveness today before the time (i.e., the Day of Resurrection) when he will have neither a dinar nor a dirham. If he has done some good deeds, a portion equal to his wrong doings will be subtracted from them; but if he has no good deeds, he will be burdened with the evil deeds of the one he had wronged in the same proportion”. [Al-Bukhari].

Remember that the Noble Prophet taught us:
Narrated `Abdullah bin `Amr:

The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “A Muslim is the one who avoids harming Muslims with his tongue or his hands. And a Muhajir (an emigrant) is the one who gives up (abandons) all what Allah has forbidden.” [Sahih Al Bukhari]

And Allah clearly forbade us from this act. He Almighty says:

“O you who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin. And do not spy or backbite each other. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his brother when dead? You would detest it. And fear Allah; indeed, Allah is Accepting of repentance and Merciful.” (Qur’an 49: 12)

Remember that when Allah forbade us from this act, He said “and fear Allah” this means to be mindful and conscious of Allah with our hearts, minds tongues, eyes, ears… This means to fear Allah in what our tongues utter and what our ears hear and what our hearts contain. And if we accomplish this, we reach the love of Allah. “indeed, Allah loves those who fear Him (are conscious/mindful of Him)” (Qur’an 3: 76)
So be afraid of Allah, but also be thankful that He is leading you to earn His Love, and if you have the Love of Allah, you have indeed earned the ultimate goodness in this life and the next.

Remember that what your tongue utters is a reflection of what your heart contains. And if our tongues are corrupt, it may be that our hearts are corrupt… and what a destruction it is for us to meet Allah with corrupt hearts when we were asked to purify them!
Basically allowing ourselves to fall into backbiting and slandering and gossip essentially means that our hearts may have jealousy, hate, heedlessness, resentment…. and all of this is among the diseases of the heart. And we were commanded to purify ourselves and engage in purification of the self.

“He has certainly succeeded who purifies himself” (Qur’an 87:14)

Remember to never take a word lightly. We enter Islam with a word the the shahada and we have from Allah His Words and this is the everlasting miracle. Words are heavy in Islam, and they are heavy on the scale and they are heavy to Allah
Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported:

The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “A man utters a word pleasing to Allah without considering it of any significance for which Allah exalts his ranks (in Jannah); another one speaks a word displeasing to Allah without considering it of any importance, and for this reason he will sink down into Hell.” [Al-Bukhari].

Remember what the Messenger commanded:
It was narrated from Abu Hurairah(RA) that the Messenger of Allah(ﷺ) said:

“By the One in Whose Hand is my soul, you will not enter Paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Shall I not tell you of something which, if you do it, you will love one another? Spread (the greeting of) peace among yourselves.'” [Sunan Ibn Majah]

How can we spread peace, if our tongues are spreading hate and dispute and sarcasm and mocking of others, and injustice against others and we let our tongues loose with no monitoring or controlling? How can this lead to peace?

Bottom line, it’s not worth it. It isn’t!

Shaitan wants us to fall into this sin because it is so easy. Just Little words uttered in a matter of seconds but their outcome is destructive in this life and the next.

So, don’t give him that.

Just control your tongue!

Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) said, “Whoever can guarantee (the chastity of) what is between his two jaw-bones and what is between his two legs (i.e. his tongue and his private parts), I guarantee Paradise for him.” [Sahih al-Bukhari]

Now for the Action Plan…

People are difficult sometimes. Right? If you had an argument with someone, and then you try to talk to them again, you’ll feel like things are not the same anymore. They might not meet you with the same open arms and complete acceptance like before. And if you had several problems or downfalls with the same person, then that person might black-list you and make sure not to accept you back in his/her life because of your mistakes.

This is how we treat each other sometimes.

But this is NOT how Allah treats us!

Allah’s Name is ArRahman ArRaheem (The Continuously Merciful, The Especially Merciful), and He is indeed uniquely and exceedingly Merciful than any of His creation.

Look at this hadith…

Anas b. Malik reported that Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) said:

“Verily, Allah is more pleased with the repentance of His slave than a person who has his camel in a waterless desert carrying his provision of food and drink and it is lost. He, having lost all hopes (to get that back), lies down in shade and is disappointed about his camel; when all of a sudden he finds that camel standing before him. He takes hold of its reins and then out of boundless joy blurts out: ‘O Allah, You are my slave and I am Your Rubb’.He commits this mistake out of extreme joy”. [Sahih Muslim]

This is actually saying that if you want to turn to Allah in repentance and you are embarrassed or ashamed of your sins and mistakes, Allah will never meet you with rejection or lack of trust. On the absolute contrary, He will be in extreme joy and He will be more pleased for you turning back to Him than you could ever imagine. Allah is telling you to never be embarrassed to come back to Him again and again and again, no matter how many times you have fallen or how long you have been away.

Remember this hadith?

Anas (May Allah be pleased with him) reported:

Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “Allah, the Exalted, has said: ‘O son of Adam, I forgive you as long as you pray to Me and hope for My forgiveness, whatever sins you have committed. O son of ‘Adam, I do not care if your sins reach the height of the heaven, then you ask for my forgiveness, I would forgive you. O son of ‘Adam, if you come to Me with an earth load of sins, and meet Me associating nothing to Me, I would match it with an earthload of forgiveness.”‘ [At- Tirmidhi]

This is part and parcel of this religion. No matter how many times you have sinned or how gravely you have sinned, you can ALWAYS come back to Allah in repentance, and He will always accept you…

“And it is He who accepts repentance from his servants and pardons misdeeds, and He knows what you do.” (Qur’an 42: 25)

Now, this doesn’t mean that we should abuse this mercy and this kindness. This does not mean that we should indulge in wrongdoing, sinning, heedlessness and being completely distant from fulfilling our purpose in life.

Allah Glorified and Exalted created us for a purpose. He created us and honored us with the ability to learn about Him, so much so than any other creation; He honored us with the ability to love Him more so than any other creation.

To learn, love, worship Allah and fulfill our relationship with Him and our purpose in life, we need to be consciously following the perfect plan He provided for us.

We need to be consciously engaging in a relationship with Him. It doesn’t make sense to ignore Him for the most part of our lives and then meet Him suddenly on the Day of Judgement and expect to be popped into Paradise while we haven’t fulfilled our purpose of creation. Right?

The Ultimate Mercy of Allah is granted for those who are sincerely making an effort to rectify their affairs. You just have to be consciously and sincerely seeking Allah and His path.

Allah says:

“But indeed, I am the Perpetual Forgiver of whoever repents and believes and does righteousness and then continues in guidance.” ( Qur’an 20: 82)

So the point is for us to be serious about our relationship with Allah and bettering ourselves.

If you do have this desire, but still engaged in sins, then what to do?

1.         First thing is to stop the sin. Do not persist on committing the sin or going back to it. Make conscious, serious effort to stop and quit the sin.

2.         Second, sincerely regret the sin. Regret is essential in showing sincerity. If you truly regret a wrongdoing, then you understand why Allah told us that it is harmful and you desire to make things right and find the halal and pure means that Allah subhanu wa Ta’la prescribed instead.

3.         Third, seek forgiveness of Allah and repent from the wrongdoing.

One of the ways to do that is to follow what was mentioned in this hadith:

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings upon him) says: “There is no one who commits a sin then purifies himself well (does wudoo’/ablution) and stands and prays two rak’ahs (two units of prayer), then asks Allah for forgiveness, but Allah will forgive him.
Then he recited this verse: ‘And those who, when they have committed Faahishah (illegal sexual intercourse) or wronged themselves with evil, remember Allah and ask forgiveness for their sins; — and none can forgive sins but Allah — and do not persist in what (wrong) they have done, while they know’ (Qur’an 3:135).” [Abi Dawood]

So perform this prayer of repentance.

4.   Lastly, have a strong, sincere intention not to go back to the sin.

When you do the above successfully, you’ll have a fresh clean start, insha’Allah.

Now, you need to remember one very important point. Allah is your Ultimate Helper. No one can progress in this path without the Help and Mercy of Allah. There is a reason why we repeat the verse ” It is You we worship and You we ask for help.” ( Qur’an 1: 5) in Surat Al Fatiha 17 times everyday during the five daily prayers.

It is Allah who ultimately helps us on His path. He is not a faraway Goal, He is our ally and Helper if we truly want to better ourselves.

Actually, the fact that you want to repent to Allah means that HE is The One who wants you to return to Him and He wants to accept your repentance!
He says in the Qur’an:

“Then He turned to them so they could repent. Indeed, Allah is the Accepting of repentance, the Merciful.” (Qur’an Surat AtTawba, Chapter 9: 118)

So always remember that so long as you are serious and sincere in seeking Him, He will facilitate and open doors for you.

Now, what are things to remember on this path as you start over?

1- Establishing prayer: this is the most important thing to work on right now. This is the daily connection and commitment you have with Allah Almighty. It keeps you focused and always link you with Him. Also prayer is the first thing that the person will be asked about on The Day of Judgement. So take it seriously and make sure you do it consistently and on time.
Remember that prayer and Qur’an are interrelated. Your knowledge of the Qur’an and understanding of it will increase your concentration and your presence in prayer and the degree to which you really feel connected to Allah Almighty. When we truly listen and concentrate on the words of Allah and the fact that we’re standing between His Hands in prayer, then we will feel the love of Allah, awe of His Power and Might, the fear of misguidance, remembrance of the Day of Judgment, the closeness of death… and all the experiences that Allah  lets our hearts and bodies experience upon listening to His words.

So work on establishing your prayers.

2- Connecting more deeply with the Qur’an. Reading the Quran is a pleasure, guidance, cure, relief and mercy for the sincere seekers. Try to learn the meanings of what you read in depth. This will truly fill your heart and mind with awe of Allah and it will keep you focused on the straight path.

If there are Quranic tafsir sessions in your area, attend them. If there is an institute that organizes sessions on tadabbur Al Quran (pondering on the meaning of the Quran), then seek this opportunity.

There are several institutions online as well that help greatly with that, like Bayyinah Tv and Bayyinah Institute, they have short and quite interesting explanations of the Quran that will help transform your relationship with it greatly. Try to look for the meaning and explanation and linguistic beauty of the Qur’an to enrich your experience and aid you in connecting further with the word of Allah. There are plenty of resources available freely online. (Check Quran Weekly on YouTube for example).

3- Seek righteous companionship. It is a very important aspect of this path to have righteous friends that aid you on the path, remind you when you forget and uplift you when you feel down. See if you can volunteer in a nearby masjid, find charitable projects to volunteer in and help the poor/needy and the orphans. These are all activities that shall fill your time with goodness and introduce you to pious friends.

And don’t forget that first and foremost, you must seek Allah’s Help. Make sincere dua (supplication) to Allah to really help you and guide you and show you the way, and most definitely Allah is The Responsive and The Most Near.

So long as your soul is still in your body, there is still hope and Allah is opening the opportunities wide open for you. Seek the path of Allah because in it you will find ultimate and true peace, completion and satisfaction. You will find soothing pleasure, hope, meaning, purification and light that you haven’t experienced before through any other means. Allah gives us the path and the cure and His own Help and Support. So seek the opportunity and don’t waste it. Start now. Make dua to Allah and He will hear you and He will respond and He will open doors. Pray to Him constantly, listen to His words and understand them, be in the company or those who remember Him and seek Him, do righteous deeds as much as you can…. and you will find you entire life uplifted, filled with hope, meaning and purpose.

Just start and keep going… there is no hopelessness in this path.








http://hadithoftheday.com/how-to-start-over-after-a-life-of-sins/

Certainty. It is what we seek as humans to offset the inconsistencies of our lives. Fortunately, when we experience anxiety due to the unknowns that occupy our minds and hearts, we have the necessary tool, the Qur’an, to navigate us in the direction of providence. Nearly 10 years ago, I began medical school in Grenada, the West Indies. I was not sure what I wanted to do with my life. I did not know what direction my life would go; whether I could complete my studies, whether I was ready for marriage, or whether my relationship with Allah, subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He), was something I was content with.

One of my favorite spots in Grenada was right outside the anatomy lab. The lab sits atop a cliff overlooking the Caribbean Sea, and I would stand there in awe, taking in the seemingly endless ocean as it met the horizon. The sea was characteristically still but its endless stretch into the horizon embodied the limitations of our senses. I could hear the waves beat the shore in a gentle, rhythmic drum.

Prophet Abraham’s (as) Encounter

Reflecting on Grenada’s ocean waves reminded me of a passage in the Qu’ran where the Prophet Abraham, alayhi as-salaam (peace upon him), is reflecting upon Allah’s (SWT) signs, such as the sun, the moon, and the stars. For him, the celestial structures gave him peace in a world that couldn’t always be understood; one riddled with people who didn’t share his values, primarily monotheism:

“And thus did We show Abraham the realm of the heavens and the earth that he would be among the certain. So when the night covered him [with darkness], he saw a star. He said, “This is my lord.” But when it set, he said, “I like not those that disappear.” And when he saw the moon rising, he said, “This is my lord.” But when it set, he said, “Unless my Lord guides me, I will surely be among the people gone astray.” And when he saw the sun rising, he said, “This is my lord; this is greater.” But when it set, he said, “O my people, indeed I am free from what you associate with Allah. Indeed, I have turned my face toward He who created the heavens and the earth, inclining toward truth, and I am not of those who associate others with Allah.” And his people argued with him. He said, “Do you argue with me concerning Allah while He has guided me? And I fear not what you associate with Him [and will not be harmed] unless my Lord should will something. My Lord encompasses all things in knowledge; then will you not remember?” (Qur’an, 6:75-80)

Abraham (AS) used Allah’s (SWT) signs to navigate through the questions of his existence. He utilized the tools of the seen world as a portal into understanding the celestial realm and directed his questioning as a guide towards understanding the divine. Allah (SWT) graced him with intuitive inquisitive thought; and He answered him in ways that he could understand. These signs exist for us well. They may be used as a spiritual compass so long as we realize that the path is ultimately to Allah (SWT).

However, in a full reversal of perception, it didn’t take too long for those gentle waves to turn into ferocious towers of water. I didn’t expect what happened during that first year on the island.

Having Faith in Allah’s (SWT) Signs

It was Autumn 2004. We were just beginning our medical studies, and we were completely engrossed in our work. Word came that a hurricane was brewing in the Caribbean Sea, but the likelihood of it hitting Grenada was slim to none. We did not pay much attention to the warning and went about our routine; studying followed by more studying. Later that evening, we were told that the next day’s classes would be canceled given the slight chance the hurricane would take a turn for Grenada. We took the rare opportunity to put down our books, hunker down in our dorms, and enjoy the night hanging out.

By early morning, we turned on the television and received a rude awakening. Ivan had changed course and his eye was heading for the center of Grenada.

Given the unexpected turn of events, my friend Taha and I drove over to a spot where we could grasp the power of what was happening. Waves were smashing into the coast ferociously, and the locals were busy protecting their windows with wooden panels. Feeling overwhelmed and knowing that we were in the midst of Allah’s (SWT) power, we did what felt natural. We stayed right where we were, and we prayed.

Once the hurricane struck, we spent an entire night challenged by window-shattering wind, sheets of rainfall, and a home flooded to our knees with water. We all felt an ominous vulnerability that night. When would someone come to help us? Did we have enough food to last more than a week? Could we protect ourselves from imminent danger? It is when you are alone in an uncertain world that you realize only Allah (SWT) is the Comforter. Praise Allah (SWT), we worked together to endure the night and the few days following, and we established a community to help ourselves and local residents recover from the storm.

Seeing Faith in the Stars

One of the main unexpected blessings that took place following the hurricane was the lack of light pollution. The entire island lost its power in the aftermath of the hurricane. I remember going down to the beach situated near our dorms the night before our departure from the island. The sand was characteristically black and silky, a far cry from the sandy beaches I was accustomed to back home. My friends and I had started a campfire, and we took time to reflect upon the days and nights we had gone through since the hurricane. As I lay down on the sand, without the artificial bulbs veiling the heavens, I was able to visualize something entirely unique and wondrous.

The sky above was a back-lit canopy of red, white, purple, and blue. Stars were clustered into perfected formations; branches extending from the trunk of the universe pushing the boundaries of what I knew existed. Feeling entirely vulnerable and insignificant within Allah’s (SWT) realm, I remembered an often-cited verse from Surat Noor in the Qur’an:

Allah is the Light of the heavens and the earth. The example of His light is like a niche within which is a lamp, the lamp is within glass, the glass as if it were a pearly [white] star lit from [the oil of] a blessed olive tree, neither of the east nor of the west, whose oil would almost glow even if untouched by fire. Light upon light. Allah guides to His light whom He wills. And Allah presents examples for the people, and Allah is Knowing of all things.  (Qur’an, 24:35)

I came to the realization that we are not so different than Abraham (as) in our quest. We all yearn for certainty, but that only comes to those who actively seek it. Muslims around the world are feeling uncertain and vulnerable, particularly at a time when the violent actions of others are heavily portrayed as the norm. But we don’t have to despair. We should look to God (swt) and His signs as our bearing point. We must continue on our journey, leading with good character and positive energy. We must be honest with our weaknesses and ourselves both individually and collectively. Only then can we improve.

Savoring that last night on the island, enamored by the stillness of the ocean, and the universe glistening above, l laid on the beach, and I closed my eyes. When I opened them, I felt some certainty in an uncertain world.

Original source: http://www.suhaibwebb.com/relationships/withthedivine/signs-of-certainty/.

singlessubway:
Yes, but is he still on, I heard the program was pulled off.

yes it as been stopped so painful

singlessubway:
Yes, but is he still on, I heard the program was pulled off.

yes it as been stopped