Joavid:


you sure it's easier? can you compare the postpartum pains?

also, does the tummy ever get back to the way it was?

do the scars fade?

The scars may not fade but I can assure you that the tummy will certainly go back to the way it was. Both processes involve pain, it is left for one to choose the type of pain she wants to handle.

A friend of mine who gave birth to twins with an emergency CS said she will opt for elective CS next time.

Personally, I really don't think it matter. As long as mother and baby are alive and well after the whole process, the method of birth does not matter.

wadetaw202:




I still repeat it, your wife will never know how to cook or do anything in the home. May she come from a spoilt home where house helps do everything, while she only plays with her smartphone and watch telemundo.

And if you are a woman, may this be the portion of your son. In Jesus Name, Amen!

Lol.

If I am a woman, I will not choose a wife for my son. If she can't cook or clean and he accepts her like that, I will also learn to accept her like that.

Your wife will know how to do everything in the home but will discard you like trash once your experience tough times. Pray you are never short of money or else...

wadetaw202:


May you end up with a wife who can't do anything. Please say amen!

I will end up with a wife who loves me enough to be the woman I want her to be. (This is if I happen to be a man)

I will end up with a man who loves me enough to be the man I want him to be. (This is if happen to be a woman)


And may you end up with a woman who is the best cook and home maker in the world but leaves you immediately your money stops flowing. Say Amen to that!

wadetaw202:



Marriage is not just about the man and his wife; it is more or less about your children.

What precedence are you laying for your kids when their mom can't cook or wash or do simple things a woman should do in the home?

You claimed someone learnt. Well, I have seen someone who never learnt. She is still in her husband's home today unable to cook or take care of the home. She is using her younger sister, who is living with her, as free maid.

That her sister is the one taking care of the home and the children simply because the elder sister wasn't taught how to do it when she was younger. She is so useless that she can't even prepare custard even after 10 years of marriage. All she does is to come back from work, take her bath and go and rest or watch tv or play with her husband.

In the morning, she will take her bath and head for work without touching any work in the home.

And it may interest you to know that she is a teacher in her kids' school, yet she will not take the kids to school in her car; she will ask her younger sister, the "free maid", to bring the children to school, just because she couldn't do "kids' wahala". She could give birth, but couldn't care for the children.

The story above should tell you that when a woman doesn't know how to cook, she will also lack in several other ways. A woman who can't cook is a half-baked adult. She will also have problems in several other ways.

Because you Dont want a free maid, is that an excuse to marry someone who doesn't know how to take care of the home? Someone who had house help working for her while she was growing up and never had to do anything? Someone who never had the opportunity to take responsibilities for the home as a teenager?

I Dont want that kind of woman in my life. You are free to make such your wife if you are a man, since you Dont want free maid.

And if you are a woman, you are free to allow your male child to marry a woman who can't cook or care for the home.

It is your choice.

Nobody created by God is useless. Note that yet again.

You are also missing the whole point of marriage my dear. It is not more or less about children. It is about the two people involved. Some couples may choose not to have children. Even if you do have children, at some point, they will leave and it still boils down to the two people involved in the marriage.

Yes, the woman in question cannot cook or clean or take care of children, she is still living with her husband and they have been together for 10 years and he does not regard her as useless. If you do not want that kind of woman in your life, it doesn't mean that those kind of women are useless, note that.

Men are supposed to provide for their family. Many men today are not providing for their families, yet they are not regarded as useless by their wives. They are still living happily with their wives. Does that mean they are providing a wrong precedence for their children? I don't get it. If a man is not living up to expectations, his wife is supposed to cover him. If a woman is not, her husband should send her packing because she is useless. Na wa ohh.

Apparently, the day your wife becomes incapacitated, the so called love you have for her will disappear and you will start looking for another good cook who can keep a home. This is the very reason why men discard their wives when she is diagnosed of a terminal illness after many years of marriage. May God help us all.

zicoraads:

I think it does. See, I don't want to go into the sermon of how many marriages are packing up due to one reason or another. But as you mentioned earlier, a wife's knowledge of how to cook doesn't guarantee a happy marriage. Agreed!

But then, why don't we look it the present society of ours and ask why so many marriages are packing up? Why wasn't it so bad during the times of our parents and their parents before them? We have had to sacrifice some of the things that created a special bond between a man and his wife on the alter of 'civilization.' Forget western culture. An African man is still an African man. And nothing is truer than the saying, 'the way to a man's heart is through his stomach.'

I have been there before. That feeling of utmost satisfaction and fulfillment when you have finished eating a sumptuous meal. It's indescribable!

Why most marriages are packing up today is simply because of selfishness. Like it or not, times are changing. It is no longer the world of our parents or the of their parents before them. Civilisation has come and it is here to stay. We can never go back to that time. It won't be possible even if we try. Some things cannot remain as it were in the time of our parents. Western culture has nothing to do with this. Even oyibo men like their women to cook for them.

A man who loves a woman unconditionally, won't see her shortcomings as an issue. She will also not see his shortcomings as an issue. If the way to man's heart is truly through his stomach, why do we have men who cheat on their 'perfect' wives who can churn out meals similar to those prepared by professional chefs sporting the Michelin awards? Why do we have women who can serve cordon bleu but are being constantly abused by their husbands? Why do we have women who are broken beyond repair because of the psychological torture they had to endure from their husbands despite the fact that they always aim to please in the kitchen? Does it mean that those men don't have stomachs?

I totally agree that a woman that cooks for her husband is not totally insulated from a divorce or an unhappy marriage. But then, except we want to deceive ourselves, one that cooks good meals for her man would most likely have her man in a better place than the one who doesn't.

Ermmm....No. Not at all. One who is loved by her husband unconditionally would most likely have her husband in a better place. The man will eat her crap and appreciate her for making an effort. He will gently urge her to improve. Enrol her in a catering school if possible so she can learn. We are not deceiving ourselves here. A Close family friend of mine has been married for over 30 years to her husband. I can tell you that that woman does not know how to cook. No matter the amount of ingredients she uses, her food always tastes bland. She has daughters who are married now and they cannot cook but they are with their husbands...Not divorced.

zicoraads:
Are you divorced?

Once again, I respond politely, my marital status is none of your business.

zicoraads:

Of cos it doesn't guarantee a happy marriage, but it goes a long way in helping to. The probability that it does is greater than.

And your last paragraph, are you divorced?

The probability is not in any way increased my dear. Lol

It all depends on what both partners want from each other.

And we are not discussing me here. My marital status is really not your concern.

wadetaw202:


If their cook did the cooking, then their house help would also do the washing and the sweeping and the fetching of water and virtually everything. Consequently, she would grow into a halfbaked and useless adult.

A lady who can't cook will also lack in other aspects of life that makes a woman useful in a marriage.

So, what manner of daughters do you expect such a woman to give birth to? Halfbaked daughters I'm certain!

Because women who can cook end up being divorced does not give excuse for a woman to be useless in the kitchen.

It is your choice anyway.

Pray that God will send a woman who can't cook to you as wife, so that you can learn from experience how useless such a woman can be.

I also pray for you to wake up and realise you are not marrying a free maid but a help mate. And by the way, God has never created anything that is useless. Who are you to call God's creation useless?

I have seen the so called 'worthless' women change overnight and learn. Yes! Learn! Even as adults! One lady I know grew up without a mother and guess what? She learned how to wash her clothes and clean in boarding school. She also learned how to cook from her husband! She had the interest but was not opportuned to have someone teach her.She is still with her husband today after 5 years of marriage. He never for one day berated her for not knowing how to cook. He understood and taught her instead.

From everything you have listed here, you are simply looking for a housemaid disguised as a wife. You are obviously not looking for a friend or for someone you can love wholeheartedly. There is more to a woman than a cook, cleaner, maid fused in one.


Learn not to judge people too quickly my dear, it will help you in this journey called LIFE.

jabojafa:
my dear leave grammer for Prof Soyinka and Hon Ogbayabon... Go learn how to cook in u nor sabi oooh. Go ask Ngozi Okojo Iweala whether she nor dey cook for her husband upon all d degree she get. Hw wud u guys cope in d first few months of marriage jst u n ur hubby if u cnt cook? Hw long wud u b eating outside or for how long wud ur caring and luving hubby continue cooking if probably he knows hw to cook? Cooking primarily a woman's duty in d family.

Man: It is pathetic to see women who don't know how to cook.

Woman: Yeah. You know what is even more pathetic? Seeing a man who decides not to learn how to cook because he feels a woman will always do it for him.

Moral of the story: Every 'grown' adult should know how to cook. You will one day move out of your parents' home so you need to know how to cook to survive, especially in a harsh economy.

'Grown' because some adults today are just babies in disguise.

wadetaw202:


Yes, it does.

Dont just look art it from my narrow perspective of "ordinary cooking".

If a girl can't cook, it means she lacks home training. Cooking is part of the things your mother (or people you grow up with) should teach you.

If you didn't learn how to cook when yuou were a teenager, then it means you also lack knowledge on how to care of the home. It also means your parents were irresponsible.

A woman who doesn't know how to keep the home is a liability; no more no less.

No it doesn't. A thousand times 'No it doesn't guarantee a happy marriage'.

She may not have learned how to cook as a teenager because she had no one to teach her. She might have lost her mother at a very tender age. Her father, too busy looking for money to raise her, may not have bothered to teach her because he did not even know how to cook. Their cook did her job everyday and went home.

I can tell you that there are many women out there who are great cooks yet divorced. I am telling you this with certainty.

Döppelganger.

goodnewscliff:
if anyone dont get to know 60 percent of his/her in less than 2years, then he is not even investigational...u get to know smone by the way he or she speaks, talks act in some situation..if u the careful type , his or her action will leave a trace of who the person really is....if sum1 is reasonable, HOW CAN U DATE SOMEONE FOR 2,3,4 YEARS AND STILL NOT KNOW THAT PERSON WITH THE EXCUSE OF PEOPLE PRETENDING TO BE GOOD AT FIRST AND BAD AFTER MARRIAGE Such a person ought to go to REHAB....A GOOD OBSERVER CAN KNOW GENIUNE 70PERCENT INFO ON HIS/HER SPOUSE.....TALKING 4RM XPERIENCE

100% right. You will always know. Just that there is this false hope that the person will change...lol

Donald7610:
I was unlucky
It's my stupidity called love
No be God's work, God has given us the power to choose what you want
Be prayerful then God will help you out
Don't mix love with sentiment
Delay might be blessing

It was not love.

Flyingngel:
Marrying today is by the grace of God especially now where our morals has been eroded. I am a married man, pls don't marry because of beauty. Because when the two are together for atleast 5 months if she is not good that beauty will fly away and u will get annoyed at any slight provocation.

The word 'good' is very relative. What is not good to A, may be good to B. If a man does not love a woman, the slightest thing she says or does will make her a bad woman to that man. It doesn't mean the woman is a bad woman.

Waspy:
Yoruba folks will say... .Oja okunkun ni igbeyawo i.e Marriage (Choosing a life partner) is black market. What you see is not a always what you get

Abi ohh?

Mom will say it's like a package. You get home to open it, whatever you see inside you accept it. Though I don't quite agree with her. You CHOOSE whether to accept it or not.

Basically, you just told us now that being successful is equivalent to acquiring riches.

Kangol99:
WHY MOST PEOPLE WILL NEVER ACHIEVE THE SUCCESS THEY DESIRE
=============================================

I was hanging out the other day with a few friends and neighbors and somewhere along the line our discussion shifted to money and success.

I was of the opinion that all human beings have the capacity and capabilities to achieve all we desire in our hearts but the problem most people have is that they do not “PUSH HARD” & Never think of WORKING SMART as enough to achieve what they desire. Others disagreed with me (my neighbors actually, because I don’t make friends with negative thinkers). They opined that some people actually have more capabilities to succeed than the others. I don’t agree with this in any form whatsoever.

I Don’t Believe God Created Any Inferior Human Being! I strongly believe that He created us with maximum potentials to achieve all we can conceive with our minds.

I like the way Joel Osteen made an illustration to explain this point. I’ll use my own words though. Imagine you have just bought a new car, maybe a Toyota Corolla. You get on the third mainland bridge and you’re speeding at 120km/hour. You’re going past all the other cars and you are feeling like Michael Schumacher and Lewis Hamilton combined. Then all of a sudden, another Toyota Corolla with the same model, age, colour and everything you can think of goes past you like you were standing still. The car was going at 160km/hour and it zipped past you in flash. Now, think about this. You’re driving the same type of car and he moved faster than you. Did the manufacturers of the car produce a faster car for him and a slower car for you? Of course not!

The difference between the two of you is that the other guy pressed the accelerator harder than you did. That is the way it is with human beings. Because one person is moving ahead in life faster than you are does not mean that person is better than you.

It simply means you need to step on the accelerator harder so you too can catch up with him and achieve the success you crave.

Apart from not been aggressive for success enough, a lot of people are easily satisfied with what they have achieved. They get to a stage where they look back and begin to say things like
-I’ve done better than most people
- I’ve done better than my friends -
I’ve achieved more than my parents achieved They forget that if they relax, their momentum will stop and people will begin to pass them by.

You must have the attitude that no matter how far you’ve gone, the best is still in front of you. You need to keep pressing on so you don’t become a man of yesterday. I’m sure you have seen or heard of people that made a lot of money for themselves many years ago but now live in penury.

Most people will blame the Nigerian economy for such a downturn. Some others will blame the witches in their villages. While these factors and others are possible factors, I have found out that resting on ones laurels is a chief reason for stagnation.

Take a look at the lives of successful people, especially entrepreneurs. They are always coming up with new products, new ideas, new businesses and lots more. If those that are already made are stepping on the accelerator really hard, why in the whole world will you take it slowly?

My message to you today is this.
Keep pushing on.
Never accept average.
Be the best!

JoeCutie:
To those who put all their hopes in marriage, thinking that marriage is the ultimate source of happiness, you might wanna have a rethink. If you always want and wait for someone to come and make you happy, then you're really not living...just existing. Find what makes you happy and do it to the letter. Be happy, that's the ultimate thing you owe yourself. And for the records, marriage hasn't always brought about that happiness. Going into marriage is like admitting to yourself that "Yes, I'm now ready to compromise (everything)". If you're not ready for marriage, do not get married. Do not get married because "all my mates are married". And for what's worth, love isn't the most ideal reason to get married. I, for one, will never marry for love. Why? Love alone is not enough.

In an era where divorce is the order of the day, a couple - a very old one - are seen here doing their thing: married, living and loving. If you really wanna get married, stay married and happy, and grow old with your partner, be ready to tolerate and compromise. Imagine a divorce free generation...it begins with you (not your partner).

Love is enough. Infact, love is all you need to make a marriage work. I agree with every other thing you have said here 100% except for that part. If you have ever lived in a loveless marriage, you will understand what I mean. Love is everything in a marriage. It is love that will make both spouses tolerate, understand, work together, be selfless, respect each other and compromise. It is love that will make both spouses go the extra mile for each other. The love I am talking about is TRUE LOVE. It is not based in money, beauty, intelligence or success.
Mind you, the love has to come from both spouses, not from one.
Funny enough, I used to think like you that love is not enough...lol

Greatzeus:
Posts like these is another opportunity for bachelors and spinsters to learn and prepare and make necessary adjustments.
No.8 though must couples fight ?

'Fight' in this sense is not exchange of blows or physical violence. It is more like exchange of words, arguments, outbursts, venting.

Greatzeus:
Posts like these is another opportunity for bachelors and spinsters to learn and prepare and make necessary adjustments.
No.8 though must couples fight ?

'Fight' in this sense is not exchange of blows or physical violence. It is more like exchange of words, argument's, outbursts, venting.

Seeeeeeee:
I think so.

L O L

[quote author=Seeeeeeee post=47155496][/quote]

She was sexually harassed! Oh wait! Maybe she should have waited to be raped first before complaining. *mtchewwwww

Seeeeeeee:
Please i have told you i don't have your time, check the number of likes on the post then you will realize that your stup.idness is 100%

Are you kidding me? So you think that the number of likes you get means that what you said is in order? If I post naked pictures of myself will I not get many likes? Does that make it right?
Have you not heard stories of reverend sisters being raped? Children of 6 years and below being raped. Were they also indecently dressed or acting indecently?

Yes! Gbam! Fini!

*hugs*

Coldfeet:
A cheat indeed will always be a cheat!

Theres this lady who's very pretty, portable and "shapely" still after 3kids, her fitness regimen is like that of a sports person! You name it she goes the extra mile so as to remain attractive and sezy looking for her husband.

The husband did cheat on her with an over weight woman.

He said he just wanted to have a feel of what its like to do a big woman! And he kept that relationship for years!!! Till he got caught! Lolz.

He loves his wife trim( after all she's the one people see him with) but his mistress "big" the secret one that satisfies his urges.

Likewise most men that say they like their women big! The curiosity to explore the other size will also make him cheat.

Point is don't lose weight or gain it because of a mans acceptance and approval! Do it because you like it and loves who stares back at you from the mirror.

Our 5 fingers are of different sizes and length for a purpose.

Life will be such a bore if we are all tall, all short, all fat, all slim, all pretty or all ugly.

Variety is the spice of life.

Love yourself, be healthy, be happy.

To each his own. People do things for different reasons. Love goes a long way in determining how a woman behaves towards her man and towards others in a marriage. I am talking from experience. God uses people to change others. I have seen women who were razz in their youth become very calm when they finally meet one who understands and loves them properly. I have seen men who were players suddenly turn to Christ when they met a certain woman and you will hear these people say 'if not for my spouse, I would never have known the peace I do know today'

I am sure Tonto came across a lot of guys before she met this man. Why did she not 'mature' suddenly when she was dating those men? Time is not on her side again?....lol, is she the oldest woman in Nollywood who is yet to be married? Is she now the most famous actress for her to stop craving for fame all of a sudden?

Love can do all things my dear. Love can change anybody. It can make an immature person suddenly become mature. It can make an irresponsible person suddenly become responsible. It can make a wicked person suddenly become kind. I am talking real love not Zeeworld kind of love.

Never underestimate the power of love my dear.

nortcentrallord:


Lol. So how many 'v you loved correctly?

I beg to differ from your assertion, love or no love, a woman who wants to be matured will be. Tonto was childish in many ways in her crave for fame but I guess she knew time wasn't on her side anymore and she decided to scale down her excesses. Not many are lucky that way though. I pray she holds on to her new found love with family values and not tow the line of the T'z.. (savage and billz)

This is a perfect example of what happens when a woman is loved correctly by her man.

sukkot:
thats rubbish. she cant leave cuz she got no money of her own. if she had money she would have bounced lol. talk true. all these part time feminists sef.

It is not about having money. There are self made women who still stay and endure because the society expects them to. I also know many women who invested alot and yet left without a pin to start life all over again. Leaving is a matter of choice.

Even with all the money in the world, a woman still needs lots of reassurance and assistance from friends and family before she can take the step of leaving.

Built2last:
Abstinence from cheating is a function of self control.

man is innately promiscuous. It takes grace my brother.

you marry her a virgin and begin to Nyansh, after a while you will get tired.

The urge to try outside will be so strong.

what keeps you at that point is her character, Your fear for God and the vow at the altar.

For any man to start cheating, the woman must give the man a reason.

men don't cheat till they have a reason

Pure lie! A man who lacks self control will cheat. Even if his wife has the body of Kim Kardashian he will still cheat. From my little experience in life, when someone wants to do something wrong, he creates reasons backed up with facts, to justify his actions. Truth remains that anyone who cheats in his/her marriage has absolutely no reason whatsoever.

Well, I would say it depends on the product to you want to buy and how important it is to you to have the product.

Some of the products you can find online are not readily available in the usual stores around you. If you can find them online and you really need them, then you have no choice but to buy them and sacrifice the shipping costs.

My guide to online shopping
1. Check every store around you to convince yourself that the product you are looking for is not availablemor more affordable in any of those stores.
2. Go online and compare prices of the product from the must trusted/reputable online stores. Harness any discount/sales opportunity if available. (Do your research wella)
3. Consider the shipping costs, delivery time frame, payment method (some offer pay on delivery option so you actually get to see the product before you pay) and return policies as well.
4. Read reviews on the seller.
4. Give your honest review, if you can, once you receive your product

For me, you cannot compare the two because both have their pros and cons. Depends on the customer.

christopheru:

I think You are Sixes and sevens if you believe that this post is a serious one. This is just for fun but some numbers are actually correct but not all.. Why can't you for once reason?
Numbers 4,5,8,10,11,15 are for fun man. Cheer up and stop being un necessarily flustered.

Sorry op, apart from the last one, none of those points there make any sense. I actually thought the whole thing was a joke, that's why I initially commented that you are funny. Didn't know you thought....sorry, BELIEVE that some of those points are correct.

https://www.nairaland.com/1257507/post-abuja-jobs-here


Try this link

OP, you are so funny.

Omg!

ngoben:
Domestic violence:hv a frd who told me dat. Her bf beats her and there is nothing wrong with it after all her dad beats her mum.she said we women need it atymes€...I just answered hmmmmmmmmmmm

O dI egwu.

A man I once knew was admonished for hitting his pregnant wife. What he said was that he only did what everybody else does and it was called domestic violence, meaning that to him, what there was nothing wrong with what he did. This is the psychological effect of domestic violence on children and how they grow up with it to become adults.
That adult's parents stayed together so that their child will not be ruined by coming from a broken home. Ironically, he is already ruined by growing up inside that home.