......

What do you need a man for actually

Stop getting yourself worked up over nothing. The right man hasn't come yet. If he does, things will naturally fall in place and before you know it you're in.

Now, you're not alone. So many of us are being faced with this dilemma of settling down with the right person and who's actually serious or not serious. Just that only a few like you can muster the courage to come open with it. But instead of blaming yourself unnecessarily for something that is beyond your control, I'll advise you take a break from relationship matters for your own sanity! What will be will be.

Lastly, don't ever think you're not good enough. Be good to yourself. Love and pamper yourself. If there's anything you can do to give youself joy, never withhold it from yourself.
Don't look on others having it all good or compare yourself to anyone. Depression is real.

Surrender all to Jesus. For the bible says, its not by power, nor by might but by my Spirit says the Lord. And he'll make things beautiful in His own time.

Ngozi... I feel your pain...life is just so cruel.... Everyone isn't in love these days, just fighting for self interest. Me too I fear you as you fear me, cuz we all are liars....

One might get into relationships with you and you will make den see hell..... Most of all. I fear ladies who boost about not wanting anything from men financial, cuz ego later ruins the party..

Wish I know you better dou

Such a guy isn't into you. He is just lusting after you.

ok

not talked here for long. but the truth is relationship is the most confused thing in our present world. if that guy is calling u baby and has not asked u out two things are involved.. it's either he likes u but does not know how to switch from being a friendly person to being as lover.... or he is hoping things will just flow in naturally cos this days some people are even playing the role if babe and Bobo without definite asking out which is very dangerous.....

Quite true

madone:
not talked here for long. but the truth is relationship is the most confused thing in our present world. if that guy is calling u baby and has not asked u out two things are involved.. it's either he likes u but does not know how to switch from being a friendly person to being as lover.... or he is hoping things will just flow in naturally cos this days some people are even playing the role if babe and Bobo without definite asking out which is very dangerous.....

Kingsasian:
Such a guy isn't into you. He is just lusting after you.

You won't understand.

bigpicture001:
Ngozi... I feel your pain...life is just so cruel.... Everyone isn't in love these days, just fighting for self interest. Me too I fear you as you fear me, cuz we all are liars....

One might get into relationships with you and you will make den see hell..... Most of all. I fear ladies who boost about not wanting anything from men financial, cuz ego later ruins the party..

Wish I know you better dou

This is how it begins and the cycle continues.

It's not by seeing it as an opportunity to jump at just because she presented it and so you think you are different therefore you can make it work. You might just be another guy wanting to take her on a rollercoaster ride only to drop when the ride is getting very exciting.

On a good day, would you go for her? Can you approach her?

Not trying to spoil show here but this is how the merry-go-rounding starts.

I know her PM will be popping with DMs by now.

AsherAmari:


This is how it begins and the cycle continues.

It's not by seeing it as an opportunity to jump at just because she presented it and so you think you are different therefore you can make it work. You might just be another guy wanting to take her on a rollercoaster ride only to drop when the ride is getting very exciting.

On a good day, would you go for her? Can you approach her?

Not trying to spoil show here but this is how the merry-go-rounding starts.

I know her PM will be popping with DMs by now.

I only laff...you are very correct though to b sceptical.... If u follow most of my recent comment you realise I just lost a relationship dear to me... But only those who dare can count wins....

Didn't say am diving at her even. But am open to new persons in my life.....

bigpicture001:


I only laff...you are very correct though to b sceptical.... If u follow most of my recent comment you realise I just lost a relationship dear to me... But only those who dare can count wins....

Didn't say am diving at her even. But am open to new persons in my life.....

Ok. Sorry for the attack though. Never knew you were hurting. Hope you've gotten over it though.

Good luck then.

AsherAmari:


You won't understand.

I have had similar experiences and worse due to the fact that I am an introvert and most relationships I have been into started online and distant as well,so I quite understand.

Op, e mean say your cup don full con dey overflow & by the time e overflow finish, then u will see shege shege. I think u understand that.

ngoziwrites:
My relationship life has been hell! Trust me, it's been crazy and unfortunately, I am a sucker for love.

Why do guys keep leaving or hurting me? I would ask myself so many times. What made it worse is the fact that I was Loyal, Honest, Committed, Supported & Loved these people with my all. Zero demands, just someone to grow with and smash goals with.

Finally, I realized my mistake, I was going for the wrong guys! I ignored the ones I am very sure are ready to take bullets for me but one can't force love yeah?

Sometimes being quite beautiful is something else because plenty guys just LIE & PRETEND.

Questions Arising:

1 . Is it sane to meet a girl online and ask her out without seeing her? When a guy does this is it real?

Personally, I think before agreeing for anyone to travel down to see me, then whatever we have should be defined. I.e Definitely, we should be friends for weeks or months as the case may be, build something good, ask me out and then I can accept, then he can visit as a boyfriend or I visit as a girlfriend.

But I think it's lame to just accept someone to visit or vise versa when we haven't made it official yet or am I being too hard on myself?

Like why stress yourself to travel to visit or even stress me when you know you don't want a relationship? I will rather wait and save all that energy for someone sensible.


2. When a guy doesn't asks me out, yet keeps calling me baby and says I love you and wants to travel down to come see me and we lodge (We haven't seen). Note, he didn't talk about relationship or anything serious, he is just babying me up and down and wants any of us to travel to visit, he also painted sexual images of what may happen.

Is this the way players behave? Can any meaningful thing come out of this kinda scenario? Note, he isn't asking me out or hasn't asked me out, so why the baby or saying love you?

Note: I work from home. I am an introvert and rarely go out, which means, I respond to messages online.

Note, I constantly make the mistake of thinking people can't purposely lie and hurt you just to get whatever they want. Because, I won't do that.

So, the question again:

Can a guy who just starts calling you baby, my baby, love you or making it look like y'all saying without necessarily asking out be serious or want a meaningful relationship in the long run? Is this the player thingy?

I am tired of being lied to.

Any tip to help?

You're the cause of your problem.

The one Wey like you una go say he too Boring he no Sabi toast

The one Wey wan chop and clean mouth na them you go follow dey gum body

Shiloh will solve you and your fellow girls problem

Babygirl, I wish there was a manual to these things.. I really wish

In recent times, "love" is the most used word, grossly misconstrued too.. Lies and deception have become the order of the day, we're all woke afterall lol.. I don't intend to make you feel worse than you already are, no dear, not at all.. Just as AsherAmari has said, please stop worrying your pretty lil head, stop beating yourself up over this Ngoo.. Just keep being amazing, do you, love you, pamper you, you matter, you're enough, you're beautiful, you deserve all the good things of life and more, don't let anybody make you feel less than a Queen okayy

Your knight in shining armor is not sooo far away as it may seem, you both will definitely cross paths soon.. Don't dull your shine hun

@Ngoziwrites , awwn. Why did you wipe out the post?

I guess you were all up in your feelings when you created it, and modified when you snapped out of the mood.

You shouldn't have wiped it out, though. You'd have gotten some sound insights that could have provided clarity on what you're experiencing, and how to approach situations better.