I've noticed how family convergence in the sitting room is quickly going into extinction. Despite that I had a playstation and personal computer while growing up, it was deemed disrespectful to remain in the room at night while everyone was in the sitting room.

Mum would make us watch Yoruba movies with her and harness those moments to bark life lessons at us, citing the moral lessons in each movie we watched. Dad, on the other hand, would ask how school went, ask after our friends, and stuffs like that. You must go out to welcome him at the sound of his car horn.

Today, you see kids whiling away on social media with the door to their room locked, not minding the presence of their father in the house. Not even the reality shows playing in the sitting rooms interest them anymore. How then will they bond with the rest of the family?

Kids nowadays can stay in their room all day and would only come out to eat, then they go back inside.


Being together in the sitting room is a great opportunity for family bonding. Some parents even allow locked doors in their house. You can't be my child and have your door locked. That's a privacy you won't be privileged to have under my roof. You must come to the sitting room to bond with your siblings and we your parents.

What do you think guys? Is social media the sole reason for kids locking themselves up in their room these days?

It's not always about the sitting room where parents struggle to remember morals.


There should be an organized family meeting regularly.


Parents are failing woefully in their responsibilities..most parents even make their children feel if they don't hustle and become rich like neighbour James’ son, they'll be nothing to write home about.

What do you think guys? Is social media the sole reason for kids locking themselves up in their room these days?

In a sense, perhaps. Though, in my day, books served the same purpose. I mean, imagine my parents sitting me down in front of Nollywood when I can be reading a good book, I know which I would prefer, just as I am certain I would prefer coming on here to read intelligent posts like yours instead of Nollywood.

I was lucky. There was no Nollywood in my days, to start with, and telly even was no more than one single NTA channel, so my dad and I got quality time discussing books and world events courtesy of the BBC World Service and Voice of America and other radio stations from around the world as received on our Blaupunkt (see photo), while ma, a nurse, was busy doing shifts

If parents listen to their kids more their kids might talk to them more, is what I think.

chatinent:
It's not always about the sitting room where parents struggle to remember morals.


There should be an organized family meeting regularly.


Parents are failing woefully in their responsibilities..most parents even make their children feel if they don't hustle and become rich like neighbour James’ son, they'll be nothing to write home about.

Exactly.

I spoke with a mother some time last year, and what she said shocked me. She said she wouldn't mind her kids doing internet fraud as long as it brings them money. She said, after all, they are only helping Nigeria to collect back the wealth our colonial masters stole from us. Such disgusting mentality.


I wonder what parents teach their kids these days, no morals whatsoever. Have you noticed how kids just walk by you these days and don't greet? I personally don't mind that as the greetings don't feed me; however, it makes me reminisce the times when we greeted every elderly person we came by, not minding if we encountered as many as 20 before getting to our destinations. We never got tired of greeting. Up till now, I'll greet you as long as you're older.


All in all, I still feel the sitting room is the right place parents can leverage to instill manners into their kids. Let siblibgs bond together and spread love. I've seen brothers and sisters who hate each other's guts, and I believe it's their parents who failed to help them bond.

OKAY

budaatum:


In a sense, perhaps. Though, in my day, books served the same purpose. I mean, imagine my parents sitting me down in front of Nollywood when I can be reading a good book, I know which I would prefer, just as I am certain I would prefer coming on here to read intelligent posts like yours instead of Nollywood.

I was lucky. There was no Nollywood in my days, to start with, and telly even was no more than one single NTA channel, so my dad and I got quality time discussing books and world events courtesy of the BBC World Service and Voice of America and other radio stations from around the world as received on our Blaupunkt (see photo), while ma, a nurse, was busy doing shifts

If parents listen to their kids more their kids might talk to them more, is what I think.

You've raised a solid point.


But just as you've said, you and your dad spent quality time discussing various things. That's the kind of bond I want families to share, and I believe it can't be built from the sitting room. Being in the sitting room doesn't mean you must watch TV. Most of the time there can be spent having a discussion with the People whom you love.

Some fathers feel too big to talk with their kids. They prefer drinking beer with friends, thus affording the kids the leniency to while away in their rooms doing God Knows What

You just mentioned one of the causes of crime as postulated by the famous criminologist, Travis Hirschi, in his "Social bond theory". Socialization from the family is key to eliminating very many juvenile delinquency.

LordIsaac:
You just mentioned one of the causes of crime as postulated by the famous criminologist, Travis Hirschi, in his "Social bond theory". Socialization from the family is key to eliminating very many juvenile delinquency.

I've read this somewhere, and, yes, moral and societal decadence we see today sprung from families' failure in socialization.

Morals and standards are getting Ffucked day by day. And it ain't social media.

We all know that gadgets are the core reasons for this. Separate teens from their cell phones or gadgets occasionally and try educate them about the importance of bonding.

Never feel sleepy or weak to indoctrinate them with the essence of family bonding.

Let them eat at the dining table
Let them watch TV as a family
Let them pray/sing with the family

This will cause them to bond emotionally and will become a part of them when they're older.

Remember they can only learn this when they're young.

The generation that invented the internet, the Smartphone, and the iPad all played outside as children.

Mustiboy:


Thereby helping them bond well. The same cannot be said for today. Your smartphone can be your best friend as you withdraw from the society gradually

All in the name of trying to relax, we spend a lot of our working hours punching our phones to our own loss, miss a lot of opportunities and moments just because of this addiction.

We avoid cigarettes and alcohol because we know they are addictive and harmful to us but we feel right about é-cigarette and é-alcohol which is more harmful to so many aspects of our lives.

Some of us gain depression, health issues and other problems solely due to our time spent on the phone and the Internet which we can't deny.

We need to do more things that makes us put our phones down. It's just that.

SportsHD:
Morals and standards are getting Ffucked day by day. And it ain't social media.

It's 80% social media.

People are getting exposed to nonsense these days.

Your observation is true, nowadays everyone just minds his own business.

When I was growing up I remember we used to converge in the living room to watch television especially those NTA soap operas and dramas of those days

Kobicove:
Your observation is true, nowadays everyone just minds his own business.

When I was growing up I remember we used to converge in the living room to watch television especially those NTA soap operas and dramas of those days

The availability of smartphones. Many would rather watch all that on their smartphones alone now, thus affecting communication within families

Mikester:
We all know that gadgets are the core reasons for this. Separate teens from their cell phones or gadgets occasionally and try educate them about the importance of bonding.

Never feel sleepy or weak to indoctrinate them with the essence of family bonding.

Let them eat at the dining table
Let them watch TV as a family
Let them pray/sing with the family

This will cause them to bond emotionally and will become a part of them when they're older.

Remember they can only learn this when they're young.

The generation that invented the internet, the Smartphone, and the iPad all played outside as children.

Thereby helping them bond well. The same cannot be said for today. Your smartphone can be your best friend as you withdraw from the society gradually

Most people talking here are mostly adults with kids, now you're saying u were all in your living rooms growing up, bonding etc. The kids that we have these days won't bond unless they're told to do so. If their parents grew up bonding with their siblings while growing up, what changed? One thing I believe is most of the irregularities we see today are due to the parents we have these days. Most of them were trained but didn't adhere to such training.

Our parents didn't spare the Rod, but these days you will hear a parent saying if you touch my child, you will be in trouble for it.

My neighbour is one funny woman, she'll tell her kids to do something, they'll scream back at her that they won't do it, the next thing I'll hear is DO YOU THINK I'M PLAYING WITH YOU? She'll say it repeatedly and they still won't do what she told them to do. Is that one training? Kids that are not up to 10 yet.

Parents are the major cause of the rot in the society.

growing up, I wasnt dt exposed to social media, the only fun back the was for nepa to bring light n we all rushed infront of t.v to watch cartoons, movies n play games..

Now that you know I believe when you have your own family you will put your house in order and won't allow such to happen because it all boils down to the parents in the end.
The only problem is that social media and negative societal influence is making parent job a hard one
But all in all one need to give kids more attention

Parental negligence is what I call it. That bonding or things that bring that bonding is obsolete.



Even in the family group chat, many wouldn't want to comment or say something. Since the instigation of social media, highly advanced Internet accessible devices came out, the bond has reduced drastically.

Some mothers no longer find interest in communicating with their children, nor fathers too.

I have promised to embed wisdom into my children and make them civil and useful to the society.

Mustiboy:


It's 80% social media.

People are getting exposed to nonsense these days.

my son and daughter in the university don't even bother to come out to watch dstv in the sitting room,they will press their phone until it runs down and they will plug power bank until it runs down,then you see them out from there rooms

What do you expect in an era of computer technology where every one has access to and the sole control over movies and programs of their choice without having to be saddled with what every other person is watching even when its sore boring.

Technology has made us lose the bond we had and some common interests which shared which brought us together as a family like the days of Robbin hood, Telematch, Center Ring and those homely movies, with the invention of mobile phones and Data bands. Giving them the monopoly to watch whatever they like at anytime without interference. And now all everyone wants is to be on their own without any "disturbance" from family members or anyone.

I really miss those days. Even when you converge these days as a family, you'll still see two or three people getting drifted away right there and getting so engrossed in their devices. while they are physically with you, their mind is far away. So what's the point? Better to be secluded. lol...
I'll blame it all on technology.

Though, I won't encourage that in my own home and the change has to start with me by Immediately giving up social media life once I get married.

So help me God.

Let the new world come in peace and stop basking in old euphoria

True, more like, more boredom then, lol, few tvs, programs, contents, electricity - I remember when we gather in a Neighbor's place to watch superstory, wrestling etc, when they put on that small gen

My bro, many families have lost that sense of bonding. Only the word of God can bring it back.

I Dont Notice, Am Always Watching Youtube Channels

Drabeey:
Let the new world come in peace and stop basking in old euphoria

Seconded

Stop resisting change.
Nothing in life stays the same.

CharisEleos:
What do you expect in an era of computer technology where every one has access to and the sole control over movies and programs of their choice without having to be saddled with what every other person is watching even when its sore boring.

Technology has made us lose the bond we had and some common interests which shared which brought us together as a family like the days of Robbin hood, Telematch, Center Ring and those homely movies with the invention of mobile phones and Data bands. Giving them the monopoly to watch whatever they like at anytime without interference. And now all everyone wants is be on their own without any "disturbance" from family members or anyone.

I really miss those days. Even when you converge these days as a family, you'll still see two or three people getting drifted right there and getting so engrossed in their devices. So while they are physically with you, their mind is far away. So what's the point? Better to be secluded. lol...
I'll blame it all on technology.

Though, I won't encourage that in my own home and the change has to start with me by Immediately giving up social media life once I get married.

So help me God.

You're intelligent

You are on point OP.

Even family members eating on the same dinning table, especially at night is already going extinct.

Family bonds and values are depreciating so fast in our society.
Should we call it civilization?

I think YES.

Social media is already reducing real life emotions.

Missing good old days.