₦airaland Forum

Nancee4love:
I AM INLOVE WITH A GUY I AM FAR RICHER THAN.
I need a candid, serious and matured advice. I am a lady of 28yrs I stay in Abuja and work here. I am from south south in Nigeria. I recently moved to an area in Abuja and was thinking of a church to go so I went to a church closer to my house and I enjoy the service and I met this cute dark handsome guy in the church. Althrough the service my attention was on him, his personality and dress sense attracted me to him. I like slim guyz and tall guys because I am tall. So after service I went home, thinking about him and looking forward to Sunday morning to go to church to see my crush. I love the fact that this guy true loves God. One thing led to another we had to start talking and I fell even deeper inlove with him, he is a graduate and works in an IT Media firm. It's been 18 months now we have been talking and we are so fond of ourselves and absolutely we are catching feelings for each other but he has not said anything about relationship yet. I am super convinced that he has no relationship, I asked our pastor stylishly and he told me the guy is not in any relationship. This guy is a keeper, has character, treats me with uttermost respect and value. The way he looks into my eyes makes me know he has a thing in his heart for me. Note I have been to his house severally, he stays in a single studio apartment while I stay in a flat and still he is not intemidated at all. He has never asked me for money at all and never pushed for sex, and we have not had sex. We buy things for each other occasionally, like he reciprocates and appreciates my efforts.
Recently we were discussing and he Opened up to me that his salary is 80,000 and he is seriously thinking of how he can settle down with that and that's his major source of Income apart from other stuff he does. He has a registered company that he is working on already. I can see him pushing and making all efforts to improve himself. Me on the other side I make 250,000 monthly though I have not told him. I truly love this guy and I want to settle with him but on 80,000 naira income monthly. I was thinking could it be the reason why he has not asked me out yet after 18 months.
I told my girlfriends about it not relating or referring to him, my girlfriends, they said I should not settle for less I should look for a man who earns higher.
Please people here are my concerns.
1. I love this guy but he has not said anything about relationship yet, how do I make him ask me out
2. Am I settling for less with 80,000 as his salary, will he abandon family responsibility to me in the future.
3. Should I tell him how much I earn , will he not take advantage of me
4. Should I move on its been 18months but truly my heart is peaceful with him, we laugh we smile we encourage each other and we build each other.
5. Should I follow my girlfriends advice to look for someone who earns higher.
6. There is a guy who has been on my neck for 9 months now he works in NNPC, DPR has a car and comfort but I see a toxic red flag in him that's making me scared of him, yet he won't give up he is from south south as well
7. I spoke with my aunt and she said to me if she has her way she will make sure I never have contact with my girlfriends who don't understand life and who are not ready for marriage. My aunt told me that she feels the guy in my church is my God ordained husband. My mom also said the same thing that the guy is ok but she would have preferred someone from south south. My church guy is from middle belt
8. Many things are running through my mind I know I love him.
THIS ARE THE QUALITIES I LIKE IN HIM
1. He loves God and genuinely Born again Christian
2. He is sincerely and honest person
3. He is sacrificial and gives me listening ears.
4. He is very mature he seniors me with 6-7 yrs
5. He just a calm person and very organized and visionary
Please help me make the right decision by airing out your opinion.
Right now he is the only not too rich guy in my life who I expect him to ask me out and he has not. Other toaster's are super rich and they are on my neck trust me I am pretty beautiful light skin girl.

CsRockefeller:
You broke another man's relationship and you are happy?

Lol. Hope it ends well with you two.

Gravity56:
You are not sure about settling down with a man with 80k salary because you are scared he might push responsibility to you in future.

You are protecting your lean change (250k) monthly.... but a man can comfortably marry a woman without handwork, no education, no job with virtually no economic importance with his 80k salary without looking back ?


Who did this to men ??


I met a girl I did nearly everything for..... even fed her little step siblings....remain small I for dey pay their school fees.

Every time I complain of money she will lend me either ...she will follow me bumper to bumper until I pay back.....


Recently saw her bank balance over N1.6m, savings from her late dad's business she's managing...

Na there I match break , I no go give her shi shi again... Dem no swear for me.

samwash:
I will not advice you, but you already know that you want, you are only looking for options to confuse your self the more.
Remember is only constant thing in life is change, 80k salary is not forever.
Moreover, why not seek God in prayer & ask for His assistance, then also meet someone that is genuine of God to also assist you to pray over it.

Elporo:
She thinks she's in love with some guy. But dem neva Bleep. Another guy dey wey get moni too..

I think she should Bleep both guys first

Who knows ... she might be the type that likes sex... and the one that can go for hrs will win.

I seen it happen.. walahi

Fiscus105:
After your aunt(ur blood) had offered you her candid advise about reality of life, marriage inclusive, why comming to public forum to update us about new supper story series again?

Going by your episode, if I have my way ,I will advise 80k guy to run as fast as he could from you, ......I can see a wife who won't respect her huband after marriage.....
.......I can see a wife whose her friends and other 3rd party will be controlling her marriage from outside.

...............and I can see a marriage that won't last cos wife may abandon the marriage if things refuse to improve on the side of husband.

Nancee4love:
I earn more than that, 250k is my basic salary. I have other business I do dt bring in another 150-200k steady for me making it almost 450k or 400k monthly
I am truly in an emotional state now I need mature advice.

Nancee4love:
I AM INLOVE WITH A GUY I AM FAR RICHER THAN.
I need a candid, serious and matured advice. I am a lady of 28yrs I stay in Abuja and work here. I am from south south in Nigeria. I recently moved to an area in Abuja and was thinking of a church to go so I went to a church closer to my house and I enjoy the service and I met this cute dark handsome guy in the church. Althrough the service my attention was on him, his personality and dress sense attracted me to him. I like slim guyz and tall guys because I am tall. So after service I went home, thinking about him and looking forward to Sunday morning to go to church to see my crush. I love the fact that this guy true loves God. One thing led to another we had to start talking and I fell even deeper inlove with him, he is a graduate and works in an IT Media firm. It's been 18 months now we have been talking and we are so fond of ourselves and absolutely we are catching feelings for each other but he has not said anything about relationship yet. I am super convinced that he has no relationship, I asked our pastor stylishly and he told me the guy is not in any relationship. This guy is a keeper, has character, treats me with uttermost respect and value. The way he looks into my eyes makes me know he has a thing in his heart for me. Note I have been to his house severally, he stays in a single studio apartment while I stay in a flat and still he is not intemidated at all. He has never asked me for money at all and never pushed for sex, and we have not had sex. We buy things for each other occasionally, like he reciprocates and appreciates my efforts.
Recently we were discussing and he Opened up to me that his salary is 80,000 and he is seriously thinking of how he can settle down with that and that's his major source of Income apart from other stuff he does. He has a registered company that he is working on already. I can see him pushing and making all efforts to improve himself. Me on the other side I make 250,000 monthly though I have not told him. I truly love this guy and I want to settle with him but on 80,000 naira income monthly. I was thinking could it be the reason why he has not asked me out yet after 18 months.
I told my girlfriends about it not relating or referring to him, my girlfriends, they said I should not settle for less I should look for a man who earns higher.
Please people here are my concerns.
1. I love this guy but he has not said anything about relationship yet, how do I make him ask me out
2. Am I settling for less with 80,000 as his salary, will he abandon family responsibility to me in the future.
3. Should I tell him how much I earn , will he not take advantage of me
4. Should I move on its been 18months but truly my heart is peaceful with him, we laugh we smile we encourage each other and we build each other.
5. Should I follow my girlfriends advice to look for someone who earns higher.
6. There is a guy who has been on my neck for 9 months now he works in NNPC, DPR has a car and comfort but I see a toxic red flag in him that's making me scared of him, yet he won't give up he is from south south as well
7. I spoke with my aunt and she said to me if she has her way she will make sure I never have contact with my girlfriends who don't understand life and who are not ready for marriage. My aunt told me that she feels the guy in my church is my God ordained husband. My mom also said the same thing that the guy is ok but she would have preferred someone from south south. My church guy is from middle belt
8. Many things are running through my mind I know I love him.
THIS ARE THE QUALITIES I LIKE IN HIM
1. He loves God and genuinely Born again Christian
2. He is sincerely and honest person
3. He is sacrificial and gives me listening ears.
4. He is very mature he seniors me with 6-7 yrs
5. He just a calm person and very organized and visionary
Please help me make the right decision by airing out your opinion.
Right now he is the only not too rich guy in my life who I expect him to ask me out and he has not. Other toaster's are super rich and they are on my neck trust me I am pretty beautiful light skin girl.

Nancee4love:
Nope I won't disrespect him in pls, but I am also working on myself to actually be the best for him through thick and thin, but I truly love

CsRockefeller:
Yes

Nevertheless, the few who are ok like this lady here can find love.

Nancee4love:
Please this not a lie I am the person involved, I know his office I stumbled on his employment offer letter.
Please if you don't have much to say kindly keep mute. This is not a lie please I beg u.

AbujaCitiBlog:
Please dump him and completely cut off from him for the following reasons:
1, You don't love him, if you did, you won't be worried about his income.
2, With the kind of friends whom you have, you will always think that you did him a favour by marrying him.
3,
4, Your first consideration is money, so please go for who has the money because that is the only thing that can make you truly happy. And from what you have written here you must be from Edo, Delta or Rivers. Their women worship money.
5, Finally, in marriage nobody needs to prove any point to anybody. I must commend you for coming out openly and boldly to state your state of mind about your relationship. It takes a lot of courage.

zexy2030:
Follow your peace of mind. Chaos and conflicts leads to a disastrous marriage. As you have met your pastor and you have been informed he is not in any relationship atleast known to the pastor..just go for the guy through your pastor. Tell the pastor to give him a gift on your behalf, wait for his birthday or the so called val. Day, give him a call. Or try know his family like a friend not as one who needs him. Those are at subtle ways ladies make moves especially in churches.

Nancee4love:
I earn more than that, 250k is my basic salary. I have other business I do dt bring in another 150-200k steady for me making it almost 450k or 400k monthly
I am truly in an emotional state now I need mature advice.

Amotolongbo:
Still baffles how salary earners in Nigeria myopically think they are rich and that will continue till death.

You decided looking only at the 80k salary of this hardworking man and closed your eyes on the company he is working on registering and how you can key into it to raise yourself and the man

luvmijeje:
In this day and age you are waiting for a man to ask you out. What if he doesn't know how to woo a babe, you will just wait till eternity.

Babe, buy 2 tickets to a show. Tell him someone gave you these tickets free of charge and you don't mind if he tags along. When going out dress sexy. Dress to kill. Hmmm okay, you are religious, dress beautifully. Go to a professional makeup artiste, tell her to do natural make up for you.

After the show, tell him you are hungry. As you are eating in a fast food, that is when you will begin the story of your life. The first thing you will ask him is why he is not asking you out. Babe go straight to the point. Doesn't he like you. If he is a time waster, you will get to discover it that day.

Most Importantly when you start dating show him your true character. Don't pretend to be who you are not

BiggyB242:
I know someone who earns such an amount when he got married to a medical doctor earning over 250k. Now with the help of his wife, they started a business. Now he is doing so well. This is the reason I don't like ladies with so many female friends.

Nancee4love:
Thank you for this.. I will have conversation with him tomorrow after church, we are in the same unit in church so I will tell him I am coming over to his house later to talk with him, I truly don't want to appear desperate before him and my heart is beating fast what if he say I see u as a friend ... I don't think my legs can carry me out of his house to my house, I may end up crying my eyes out.

Nancee4love:
Please this not a lie I am the person involved, I know his office I stumbled on his employment offer letter.
Please if you don't have much to say kindly keep mute. This is not a lie please I beg u.

Nancee4love:
I AM INLOVE WITH A GUY I AM FAR RICHER THAN.
I need a candid, serious and matured advice. I am a lady of 28yrs I stay in Abuja and work here. I am from south south in Nigeria. I recently moved to an area in Abuja and was thinking of a church to go so I went to a church closer to my house and I enjoy the service and I met this cute dark handsome guy in the church. Althrough the service my attention was on him, his personality and dress sense attracted me to him. I like slim guyz and tall guys because I am tall. So after service I went home, thinking about him and looking forward to Sunday morning to go to church to see my crush. I love the fact that this guy true loves God. One thing led to another we had to start talking and I fell even deeper inlove with him, he is a graduate and works in an IT Media firm. It's been 18 months now we have been talking and we are so fond of ourselves and absolutely we are catching feelings for each other but he has not said anything about relationship yet. I am super convinced that he has no relationship, I asked our pastor stylishly and he told me the guy is not in any relationship. This guy is a keeper, has character, treats me with uttermost respect and value. The way he looks into my eyes makes me know he has a thing in his heart for me. Note I have been to his house severally, he stays in a single studio apartment while I stay in a flat and still he is not intemidated at all. He has never asked me for money at all and never pushed for sex, and we have not had sex. We buy things for each other occasionally, like he reciprocates and appreciates my efforts.
Recently we were discussing and he Opened up to me that his salary is 80,000 and he is seriously thinking of how he can settle down with that and that's his major source of Income apart from other stuff he does. He has a registered company that he is working on already. I can see him pushing and making all efforts to improve himself. Me on the other side I make 250,000 monthly though I have not told him. I truly love this guy and I want to settle with him but on 80,000 naira income monthly. I was thinking could it be the reason why he has not asked me out yet after 18 months.
I told my girlfriends about it not relating or referring to him, my girlfriends, they said I should not settle for less I should look for a man who earns higher.
Please people here are my concerns.
1. I love this guy but he has not said anything about relationship yet, how do I make him ask me out
2. Am I settling for less with 80,000 as his salary, will he abandon family responsibility to me in the future.
3. Should I tell him how much I earn , will he not take advantage of me
4. Should I move on its been 18months but truly my heart is peaceful with him, we laugh we smile we encourage each other and we build each other.
5. Should I follow my girlfriends advice to look for someone who earns higher.
6. There is a guy who has been on my neck for 9 months now he works in NNPC, DPR has a car and comfort but I see a toxic red flag in him that's making me scared of him, yet he won't give up he is from south south as well
7. I spoke with my aunt and she said to me if she has her way she will make sure I never have contact with my girlfriends who don't understand life and who are not ready for marriage. My aunt told me that she feels the guy in my church is my God ordained husband. My mom also said the same thing that the guy is ok but she would have preferred someone from south south. My church guy is from middle belt
8. Many things are running through my mind I know I love him.
THIS ARE THE QUALITIES I LIKE IN HIM
1. He loves God and genuinely Born again Christian
2. He is sincerely and honest person
3. He is sacrificial and gives me listening ears.
4. He is very mature he seniors me with 6-7 yrs
5. He just a calm person and very organized and visionary
Please help me make the right decision by airing out your opinion.
Right now he is the only not too rich guy in my life who I expect him to ask me out and he has not. Other toaster's are super rich and they are on my neck trust me I am pretty beautiful light skin girl.

Nancee4love:
Please this not a lie I am the person involved, I know his office I stumbled on his employment offer letter.
Please if you don't have much to say kindly keep mute. This is not a lie please I beg u.

AntiSimp:
It's strange for a guy of such age and experience of 30yrs+ to not ask you out, or tries to trick you into sex for 18months despite being close to you, since u say u are pretty. Is he as naive about gals issue? I doubt since he had previous relationship according to you.
Question is, how does he get sex? For the past 18months u can't tell me he dint have sex..just as u
Please respectfully he is not like that he is not after sex. We have not had sex and he has been a virgin for 3 decades this he told me not up till 2019.
These are my guess

1. He may have a lady whom he's observing from afar, probably younger than 29

2. He may be fixated on marrying someone younger than 29

3. He might have seen your greenlight and feels u will come too hard on him if he asks u out, so he's probably preventing that, keeping his option open, and facing his financial goals than entangling with u.

4. He may have certain notion or misconception about you, making him not to consider you as a serious option. Yes get him to talk about his notion about you....

Raise questions about wanting an honest opinion from him about what he thinks about her in terms of career, attitude, marriage, taste, and life philosophy, that u are trying to appraise and change certain things abt ursef.

Such open ended question as this is enough to make him vomit everything he feels about u...also observe his body language, tone, excitement and emotions as he talks..make him talk..and listen..urge in on with further questions...u will get many clue. Best place to do this is at a bar after 1 or 2 bottles of beer
.
5. Get him to talk abt his sex life and sex interests jsut to know how he gets sex...and don't flirt in that moment so he won't think u are trying to seduce him. Just be neutral.
Now my advice for you.
At 29, if u are serious about marriage, don't let ur 250k get into ur head. Be humble..many guys are passing through alot. If u meet a humble one who earns over 70 or 80 or 100..stop stigmatising his pay.. You don't know his history, or how much he had earned in the past. Be humble.
A man focused on his goals and vision is worth more than u can imagine. Stop being shallow.
A man earning 80k above in this current Nigeria of joblessness is not a joke.

Tohsynetita1:
bottle of bear? Christians?

Nancee4love:
I AM INLOVE WITH A GUY I AM FAR RICHER THAN.
I need a candid, serious and matured advice. I am a lady of 28yrs I stay in Abuja and work here. I am from south south in Nigeria. I recently moved to an area in Abuja and was thinking of a church to go so I went to a church closer to my house and I enjoy the service and I met this cute dark handsome guy in the church. Althrough the service my attention was on him, his personality and dress sense attracted me to him. I like slim guyz and tall guys because I am tall. So after service I went home, thinking about him and looking forward to Sunday morning to go to church to see my crush. I love the fact that this guy true loves God. One thing led to another we had to start talking and I fell even deeper inlove with him, he is a graduate and works in an IT Media firm. It's been 18 months now we have been talking and we are so fond of ourselves and absolutely we are catching feelings for each other but he has not said anything about relationship yet. I am super convinced that he has no relationship, I asked our pastor stylishly and he told me the guy is not in any relationship. This guy is a keeper, has character, treats me with uttermost respect and value. The way he looks into my eyes makes me know he has a thing in his heart for me. Note I have been to his house severally, he stays in a single studio apartment while I stay in a flat and still he is not intemidated at all. He has never asked me for money at all and never pushed for sex, and we have not had sex. We buy things for each other occasionally, like he reciprocates and appreciates my efforts.
Recently we were discussing and he Opened up to me that his salary is 80,000 and he is seriously thinking of how he can settle down with that and that's his major source of Income apart from other stuff he does. He has a registered company that he is working on already. I can see him pushing and making all efforts to improve himself. Me on the other side I make 250,000 monthly though I have not told him. I truly love this guy and I want to settle with him but on 80,000 naira income monthly. I was thinking could it be the reason why he has not asked me out yet after 18 months.
I told my girlfriends about it not relating or referring to him, my girlfriends, they said I should not settle for less I should look for a man who earns higher.
Please people here are my concerns.
1. I love this guy but he has not said anything about relationship yet, how do I make him ask me out
2. Am I settling for less with 80,000 as his salary, will he abandon family responsibility to me in the future.
3. Should I tell him how much I earn , will he not take advantage of me
4. Should I move on its been 18months but truly my heart is peaceful with him, we laugh we smile we encourage each other and we build each other.
5. Should I follow my girlfriends advice to look for someone who earns higher.
6. There is a guy who has been on my neck for 9 months now he works in NNPC, DPR has a car and comfort but I see a toxic red flag in him that's making me scared of him, yet he won't give up he is from south south as well
7. I spoke with my aunt and she said to me if she has her way she will make sure I never have contact with my girlfriends who don't understand life and who are not ready for marriage. My aunt told me that she feels the guy in my church is my God ordained husband. My mom also said the same thing that the guy is ok but she would have preferred someone from south south. My church guy is from middle belt
8. Many things are running through my mind I know I love him.
THIS ARE THE QUALITIES I LIKE IN HIM
1. He loves God and genuinely Born again Christian
2. He is sincerely and honest person
3. He is sacrificial and gives me listening ears.
4. He is very mature he seniors me with 6-7 yrs
5. He just a calm person and very organized and visionary
Please help me make the right decision by airing out your opinion.
Right now he is the only not too rich guy in my life who I expect him to ask me out and he has not. Other toaster's are super rich and they are on my neck trust me I am pretty beautiful light skin girl.

Gerrard59:
[b][/b]

Love doesn't exist in the world's poverty capital. A man isn't loved for who he is but what he has and can provide. That's a fact you people have to live with and it doesn't care about your feelings. A woman has the right to be concerned about a man's earnings prior to marriage esp in Nigeria's present state. This is how you folks encourage people to go into marriage, born plenty children scattered everywhere thereby worsening the poverty situation in Nigeria.

Talmbout Edo, Delta and Rivers women worship money. Maybe it's why the poverty rate is lower in those states compared to those who abhor money.

Nancee4love:
The story is true.. very true I have been so so emotional lately not concentrating on my Job. I want to get married before 30yrs next year I will be 29 and I can't marry any guy I have not dated over a yr or atleast a yr. On the scale of preference he stands out except the money aspect trying make him cold feet. He told me of how 4 of his exes humiliated him because of money.
So I figured out it was not character that ended his relationships just that e was constantly meeting the wrong ladies after his little money.