MichaelUde:


No comment to make on the current trending topic?

lightest:


Men, only if u guys know what I do to make my wife happy ehn. But its not my case to say as it will look like I am praising myself.

But my question is what would make a woman bring a man to UK and refuse to put her name on the bills, house rent, electricity, water and Co only for her to say I should be paying into her acct even when I pointed it out to her that in case of visa renewed in the nearest future?.

MichaelUde:


Sunderland and Newcastle are virtually the same city, very possible to live in one and work/study in the other. I took a course in Northumbria Uni once and I think a couple of my coursemates used to come from Sunderland.
In London, some boroughs are farther apart from each other than those two ciities are.

Owlette:
I would definitely do what your wife did if I had a financially irresponsible spouse that would come and mess things up for me by not meeting up with bill payments or messing up my credit score if we were to have a joint account. Some people are very bad with money management.
Disclaimer: I am not saying you’re financially irresponsible.


So what are you saying then?

Owlette:
I would definitely do what your wife did if I had a financially irresponsible spouse that would come and mess things up for me by not meeting up with bill payments or messing up my credit score if we were to have a joint account. Some people are very bad with money management.
Disclaimer: I am not saying you’re financially irresponsible.

justwise:


Another strange post…so how did you arrive at the conclusion that his wife kicked him out because he is financially irresponsible ?

Bronzedigger:
Good morning from U.A.R

lightest:


Men, only if u guys know what I do to make my wife happy ehn. But its not my case to say as it will look like I am praising myself.

But my question is what would make a woman bring a man to UK and refuse to put her name on the bills, house rent, electricity, water and Co only for her to say I should be paying into her acct even when I pointed it out to her that in case of visa renewed in the nearest future?.

what will make a woman open an account for her children without her husband knowing when she knows I can contribute to it without any argument?

So many hiding thing going on that when talked about resulted into argument.

Anyway, I really appreciate the love on this forum as I have learnt a lot from everybody including the person that wants to hear from my wife side of the story.

if I say, I have being stylishly enslave I won't be wrong with some things I have seen. But I have open up a conversation channel and hope to resolve this as quickly as possible and I will be coming back with resolution and proposal of having a better home in the nearest future.

Once again, God bless u all for ur wonderful contributions.

jtech17:

Exactly my thoughts... abi na she be the wife of the man ni.. wey come nairaland dey follow up on a case that seems similar to hers...LOL

Owlette:
I would definitely do what your wife did if I had a financially irresponsible spouse that would come and mess things up for me by not meeting up with bill payments or messing up my credit score if we were to have a joint account. Some people are very bad with money management.
Disclaimer: I am not saying you’re financially irresponsible.

justwise:


You can see how some people are trying so so hard to come up with made-up excuses to justify why the wife kicked him out?

They say maybe....

He is overweight and not attractive to the wife again, he is not developing himself..

She worked sooooo hard to bring her husband here.

She is doing 12hrs shift and should not be expected to come home to cook for the husband and kids

He is financially irresponsible

One asked men to explain why a nice and loving woman will suddenly changed...

Remember they are all waiting to hear the wife's side of the story ? SMH

lightest:


I have being trying to engage her in talks, and I think most of her grievances have being the issues we have dealt with over and over in Nigeria.that I felt it has being erased in her mind was never erased. Not adultery issues o b4 bash me.

I believe communication gap has being created for a long time which I believe most part was my fault I wil say but nevertheless, there is no way u can read minds even when u tried to ask what is wrong all the times

She is a kind of woman that wil rather bottled up issues rather than say it out.

In what she has being saying so far, she said I should give her time to think.


Though I am proposing we walk more on our communication but she believes am doing that because of my visa.

I will soon conclude what to do if ADR does not work.

The worst that could happen is going back to Nigeria but the fate of our children is my fare right now.

Please note, she is a good woman that would rather bottled issue up than say it out untill it explodes

I believe a thread on living in marriage should be open so that we can all learn from the good, the bad and the ugly of marriage in UK.

What I have realised so far is that I still love my wife and my family as a whole.

Thanks to all advices

lightest:


I have being trying to engage her in talks, and I think most of her grievances have being the issues we have dealt with over and over in Nigeria.that I felt it has being erased in her mind was never erased. Not adultery issues o b4 bash me.

I believe communication gap has being created for a long time which I believe most part was my fault I wil say but nevertheless, there is no way u can read minds even when u tried to ask what is wrong all the times

She is a kind of woman that wil rather bottled up issues rather than say it out.

In what she has being saying so far, she said I should give her time to think.


Though I am proposing we walk more on our communication but she believes am doing that because of my visa.

I will soon conclude what to do if ADR does not work.

The worst that could happen is going back to Nigeria but the fate of our children is my fare right now.

Please note, she is a good woman that would rather bottled issue up than say it out untill it explodes

I believe a thread on living in marriage should be open so that we can all learn from the good, the bad and the ugly of marriage in UK.

What I have realised so far is that I still love my wife and my family as a whole.

Thanks to all advices

justwise:


You are a good man, you haven't come here to bash your wife so as to gain sympathy despite all false accusations flying around here.

Keep working on peaceful and RESPECTFULLY resolution of this issue.

Keep your own side of your marriage vows to love her even as at this difficult time.

Give her time to decide as you keep constant contact with your kids

You will definitely find peace even in separation because you have played your part.

You have my respect.

fatima04:


Awwww, sounds like you are making improvement. Why not suggest Therapy so you can both have a professional help you work out your issues. And if she still can't overcome it then by all means it's fine.

Meanwhile what kind of job do you do? If its healthcare related go check the sponsorship list and start actively searching for an opportunity to sponsor your Skilled work visa. That way you can still be in the country to see your kids.

Wishing you the best as you navigate this period

fatima04:


Awwww, sounds like you are making improvement. Why not suggest Therapy so you can both have a professional help you work out your issues. And if she still can't overcome it then by all means it's fine.

Meanwhile what kind of job do you do? If its healthcare related go check the sponsorship list and start actively searching for an opportunity to sponsor your Skilled work visa. That way you can still be in the country to see your kids.

Wishing you the best as you navigate this period

justwise:


In addition to that @lightest if you are considering student visa route all you need to worry about is the tuition fees, you don't need to show maintenance money as you will be applying within the UK

lightest:


U make me cry bro.

justwise:


I have seen first hand what toxic marriage break up can do to a man.

A very close friend went through it and it almost destroyed him if not for intervention of city council and his work HR department who supported him and gave him time to return to work.

12yrs marriage with 3kids ended and he can't put his finger to what he did exactly.

He was kicked out and was sleeping in his car while the wife got council accommodation and child benefit from his work.

justwise:


I have seen first hand what toxic marriage break up can do to a man.

A very close friend went through it and it almost destroyed him if not for intervention of city council and his work HR department who supported him and gave him time to return to work.

12yrs marriage with 3kids ended and he can't put his finger to what he did exactly.

He was kicked out and was sleeping in his car while the wife got council accommodation and child benefit from his work.

lightest:


uhm, a lot going on in my mind. I know I am not the first person and would not be the last on this issues.

I really appreciate every one for dia contributions. Both the positive and the negatives comments are reshaping and making my spirit high.

I hope to have a good news in both ways sooner.

God bless Seun, the moderators and all the contributors because who knows if my brain would have reset to default.

this thread keeps is keeping mycompany for the time being

lightest:


Thank u, it's like u read my mind. I do care for now and I will start looking for sponsorship if ADR does not work out.

lightest:


uhm, a lot going on in my mind. I know I am not the first person and would not be the last on this issues.

I really appreciate every one for dia contributions. Both the positive and the negatives comments are reshaping and making my spirit high.

I hope to have a good news in both ways sooner.

God bless Seun, the moderators and all the contributors because who knows if my brain would have reset to default.

this thread keeps is keeping mycompany for the time being