Klass99:


This (the bolded in particular) just goes to show that you men cannot handle half the shit you do or dish out. But, we already knew that (some of us though)

cococandy:


I don’t know who’s really telling them that women don’t care. He thinks if I (for example) find out someone I’m with now, used to frequent brothels or was a miscreant, I won’t care?

Lying to themselves and reinforcing gender stereotypes that harm only women specifically.

I’m for keeping the same energy.

igbowoman:
I dont even know why young ladies feel the need to confess up and down to men things they would never know.
Ladies please learn to keep your mouths shut.
Stop telling boyfriends how many men you have slept with before you met them.
Stop telling them when you err
Stop seeking forgiveness up and down
Stop being needy.
Please stop it!!

If you've committed abortions ,tell it to God,repent and do it no more.
You don't need to tell your life stories to boyfriends.
Your past is your past,keep it there.
Stop getting too emotional ,not good for you.
These things only hurt you in the end
Many of these men have procured countless abortions for people,raped women, raped little girls,slept with people's wives and grandmothers,some have slept with their fellow men, paid and slept with prostitutes,done yahoo, were cultists on campus, stolen and done all manner of evil in their past, they don't tell those stories to every girl they meet.
They ask God to forgive and turn a new leaf and move on.
But females will let their emotions take over and be answering questions no one asked them.

This is a timely advice
Ladies please stop tarnishing your image with your own mouths.
Those same boyfriends will be sharing your conversations all over the place even on nairaland.
Zip your mouths
Pass on this timely advice to your friends.

cococandy:


I don’t know who’s really telling them that women don’t care. He thinks if I (for example) find out someone I’m with now, used to frequent brothels or was a miscreant, I won’t care?

Lying to themselves and reinforcing gender stereotypes that harm only women specifically.

I’m for keeping the same energy.

Acidosis:


But we have seen a lot of women come here to say they don't want a virgin man. We have also seen a lot of men say it's team virgin or nothing - something a lot of women have never confessed. Virginity isn't even in a woman's top 10 list of what she wants in a man.

I think the difference is crystal clear when it comes to sexuality. When men brag about lasting 1 hour in bed and having a huge manhood (something that comes probably from experience with multiple women), a woman listen in anticipation not disdain. On the other hand, men don't want to hear such from a woman.

cococandy:


Everyone should speak for themselves last last.

As for the “differences that are crystal clear”, it’s not because of any magical phenomenon that no one understands. It’s simply because you people shame women’s sexuality and some women end up buying into it.

Acidosis:


The biology of a woman already made her the receiver. For men, we are the giver. Whilst the man and woman want satisfaction, the mode of satisfaction differs. One aiming to receive would rarely go after the sexually-poor. That's why women blush over these things rather than show disdain.

igbowoman:
I dont even know why young ladies feel the need to confess up and down to men things they would never know.
Ladies please learn to keep your mouths shut.
Stop telling boyfriends how many men you have slept with before you met them.
Stop telling them when you err
Stop seeking forgiveness up and down
Stop being needy.
Please stop it!!

If you've committed abortions ,tell it to God,repent and do it no more.
You don't need to tell your life stories to boyfriends.
Your past is your past,keep it there.
Stop getting too emotional ,not good for you.
These things only hurt you in the end
Many of these men have procured countless abortions for people,raped women, raped little girls,slept with people's wives and grandmothers,some have slept with their fellow men, paid and slept with prostitutes,done yahoo, were cultists on campus, stolen and done all manner of evil in their past, they don't tell those stories to every girl they meet.
They ask God to forgive and turn a new leaf and move on.
But females will let their emotions take over and be answering questions no one asked them.

This is a timely advice
Ladies please stop tarnishing your image with your own mouths.
Those same boyfriends will be sharing your conversations all over the place even on nairaland.
Zip your mouths
Pass on this timely advice to your friends.

Acidosis:

If you have to lie to keep a relationship, that relationship will crumble anyways. So you're merely postponing the evil days o.

pocohantas:
That is how they end up with Tuface 2.0 then start crying on social media. By not caring if he is a brolosho. Same Nigerians will now ask you “didn’t you know when you entered?”

You mean you don’t envy these women with chaste husbands? Not the one you will be fighting for all over social media? I hail una wey no care o.

greenie77:


A clear reflection of the fragile nature of the male ego.

cococandy:


Lol. What are we receiving? (joke)

But on a serious note, all these theories don’t mean anything. Women receive? men give? You’re just talking about spermatozoa in this case.
When the sexual intercoursè isn’t done with conception in mind and as such the man wears a condom, then that theory of giving and receiving falls apart as the couple both give and receive pleasure.

And even if the theory stands, it still doesn’t mean anything. One doesn’t deserve to be vilified while the other is glorified, when both of them are absolutely necessary to come together for it to be successful. Unless men engage in sex with only themselves henceforth.

By subscribing to such beliefs, we inevitably tell women that they are to be in constant state of shame. It doesn’t sit right with me.

cococandy:


Women keep getting told over and over that they should care about men’s sexual wildness as long he “provides” and they start believing it from a young age.

But when the man carries it into the relationship and steps out during the marriage or even a mere boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, it hurts the woman (who supposedly shouldn’t really care as much as the man). Now we have confused women who are hurt but feel guilty about their hurt feelings. Like they have no right to be hurt by a faithless man.

And all because they truly believe that they are selfish for wanting a man who commits to them in the same way he expects strict commitment.

Acidosis:


The receive & give theory simply means that more women want to receive the best sex More men want to give the best sex.

I agree with you that shaming isn't a right thing to do but this thing also affects men.

In our society today, it is almost a taboo for a man to come out to claim virginity at 25 because men in this category believe that women don't want them. Men, most of them time, have to lie about how long they last in bed just to get the woman blushing. If more women can show some level of admiration towards virgin men (as well as 2-minute men); show them that they're open to growing and learning with their man in bed, the era of shaming will ultimately fade.

Men are the reason women lie. And women are the reason men lie.

elantraceey:


The point is not really about lying but just saying less than necessary. I have no such past to discuss any way but I have a friend who drew apart from his babe because of her past, he loved her but just couldn't look at her the same way after she told him some things she had been through, most of which weren't totally her fault but it changed nothing. Ladies generally talk too much and a lot of these things, the man would most likely never find out in his lifetime.

greenie77:


Who is more likely to shame a man who is still a virgin at 25, women or his fellow men?

Acidosis:


Both.


Who is more likely to shame a 2 minute man, women or men?

greenie77:


Both. At least you saw some guys who mocked the OP whose thread on genital wart made front page, days ago. Mocking the size of his genital based on the pictures of the affected area he posted.

On a serious note, a woman is more likely to open up to a fellow woman on her struggles with her sexual performance and not feel judged but a man will less likely as he.needs to validate himself before other men, bragging he is a stallion while in reality, he is 120 seconds!

pocohantas:
That is how they end up with Tuface 2.0 then start crying on social media. By not caring if he is a brolosho. Same Nigerians will now ask you “didn’t you know when you entered?”

You mean you don’t envy these women with chaste husbands? Not the one you will be fighting for all over social media? I hail una wey no care o.

I'm more worried about those who see sense in this.

Instead of encouraging everyone to come to a relationship with all honesty, you are telling them not to care, and not to be honest.

Mercychen:
As if they disclose theirs.

Some girls need to wise up.

I used to do that in the past but discovered they end up using it against me. So I've gotten wiser.

Now, don't come asking me if I've aborted in the past, that's not what I'm talking about. I don't have such past. Biko.

**Mouths sealed**

ImaIma1:


Get the message and stop spitting up and down.

cococandy:
Indeed. And they will tell themselves stories to convince themselves that their past means nothing. Only the woman has to be accountable



You’re gracious to think they ask for forgiveness. They don’t. They believe sin only applies to women. God exists to uphold their egos and wants. Anytime a woman does something that men are typically applauded for, then it’s time for Jesus to come back and destroy the world because “what an abomination!!”

bukatyne:
@OP:

Since the thread has naturally gotten to men vs women, I will say this:

1. Women do not care about a man's past (especially sexual) like men do about women's past. Even if a man 'confesses' that he has facilitated 50 abortions and slept with 500 women, more women would be willing to continue the relationship than vice versa. More men are willing to marry virgin women & teach them in bed than women. And according to myth, for a man to be good, he should have been with several women. There is a saying that 'every woman wants to be her man's last; every man wants to be his woman's first'.

2. Men & women are different and the area of sexuality showcases it the most; most things sexual, a man facilitates outside his body; for women, it is performed on them. For instance, if a man has paid for fifty abortions, he does not affect him physically nor does it affect his ability to father a child in future. Now compare to a woman who had fifty abortions. Same with numerous sexual partners.
> If a man says he has slept with fifty women, you think STDs, been promiscuous/sharp guy (depending on your ethical leanings) and experience in bed.
> If a woman says she has slept with fifty men, you think an overused body, been promiscuous, abortions (even of she doesn't disclose), if super smart to prevent pregnancies; you think thousands of pills and all sorts taken, you think ability to successfully carry a child to term.
There are two different pictures physically. I stress on physically because the spiritual effects are same (for people who believe sex is spiritual anyways).

I believe living a life where you don't need to hide or modify a colourful past is the best strategy.

Except you messed up on earth and migrating to Mars to settle down in life aka marry & grow up, someone would know someone that knows someone that knows your story.

This age of SM even makes it easy; imagine a lady on onlyfans/another sexual site or wearing pants on IG trying to reformat her past five years later.

That's why I am a fan of young relationships; you both are starting life together.

Klass99:


Their BS is astounding, it leaves me in shock and awe I swear. A woman won't care or won't care as much because we are inanimate objects with no mental, logical or emotional capacity, abi? I laugh in Swahili

Some years ago, there was a front page story of a guy who stole his late classmate's identity and used the deceased's stellar academic record to graduate and excel in life.

He got engaged to a lady and opened up to her about his secret. For days his babe wasn't interacting well with him, her whole disposition towards him changed and if I remember correctly she asked for some time out, after hearing his confession.

I have often wondered what happened to him, them and their plans to marry. The baba refused to respond to questions or update the house on his own thread.

His story didn't sit well with me then and it still doesn't sit well with me even now. If I was his fiancee at the time, no way was I going to proceed with that marriage - but it's different strokes for different folks, another woman won't mind but[b] some of us [/b]sure as hell do.

Klass99:


Lol , your mouth ehn!!!

That's how I read one post where you said some women will be dragging MC Olumo's gbola one day, the next day they are dragging a different person's own.

I think you missed your calling in life - comedy and providing comic relief to others.

larryjonze:




You call that illusion a message, since when did women start telling men their true past ...as much as i am into r/ship I'm shocked.

we all know if women disclose their past as much as these posts insinuate most wives won't even be married

igbowoman:
I dont even know why young ladies feel the need to confess up and down to men things they would never know.
Ladies please learn to keep your mouths shut.
Stop telling boyfriends how many men you have slept with before you met them.
Stop telling them when you err
Stop seeking forgiveness up and down
Stop being needy.
Please stop it!!

If you've committed abortions ,tell it to God,repent and do it no more.
You don't need to tell your life stories to boyfriends.
Your past is your past,keep it there.
Stop getting too emotional ,not good for you.
These things only hurt you in the end
Many of these men have procured countless abortions for people,raped women, raped little girls,slept with people's wives and grandmothers,some have slept with their fellow men, paid and slept with prostitutes,done yahoo, were cultists on campus, stolen and done all manner of evil in their past, they don't tell those stories to every girl they meet.
They ask God to forgive and turn a new leaf and move on.
But females will let their emotions take over and be answering questions no one asked them.

This is a timely advice
Ladies please stop tarnishing your image with your own mouths.
Those same boyfriends will be sharing your conversations all over the place even on nairaland.
Zip your mouths
Pass on this timely advice to your friends.