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My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan - Romance (18) - Nairaland

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Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by diplomat058(m): 11:18pm On Jan 03, 2022
Biglittlelois:



Learn to read and comprehend.
There is nothing to read and comprehend. What's the fuss about chores that you are comparing with the financial overloads? Lol. You are funny. Like you said, an housemaid can even sort the 50-60% of the chores @ the considerably affordable cost. The Husband is the Head, agreed, but the wife is also a partner. That the Husband is a senior partner does not confer a financial suicide on him. Abegi !
Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by NoToPile: 11:18pm On Jan 03, 2022
Nwachi22:


Op, since you’re sharing the bills, I hope you will also share the house chores with her and assist her to carry pregnancy. I don’t know why men of nowadays now run away from their responsibilities.
Marriage is about what each partner will benefit not love anymore.

If women were running away from homemaking the way they run from provison I wonder what will happen.

Chores ke, lailai, he wont answer you.

Let the lady sef share 20 perent of chores for him, all hell will let lose. You will begin to hear the male ego, ego this ego that.

Provide wahala
Oya do chores now double wahala,they will say it's no big deal oya do it Na, wahala will start, they will start opening thread on NL about how they can't take care of children when the wife traveled to visit her sick mum.

Some women are even providing 80percent and doing all the chores and they won't make noise, simply because he want to be dropping chop money he must make a case out of it and share percentage

8 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Validated: 11:18pm On Jan 03, 2022
bigpicture001:


Do u know I removed health insurance cover which only me will open an account for and it will cover every member of the household including herself .?

300k is not a big money
Is that not covered on your employment insurance? You are not ready to marry. You want be saving N50k for house, good plan. Do you have land?
Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by SoapQueen(f): 11:20pm On Jan 03, 2022
pompeiimagnus:
As someone who works, I’m sure you know the mental and physical stress it takes to earn a decent living in Nigeria. Men and women don’t have it easy as you clearly know. It is a smart decision to have financial discussions with your man before even getting married.

Number of kids and finances are discussions that must be had, else you guys are going into that marriage with deception. If you intend on staying at home to look after the kids, I think you should be honest with your man about your this too. If you and your man cannot have these discussions before getting married, do you really think marriage and kids would make it easier



I think you've said it all!

Yes, it's pivotal to have these discussions - finance is such a big issue in marriage. And that's why it's best if the Op and his lady go their separate ways if things don't work out. No ill feelings.

He would get a perfect woman, and maybe she would get her perfect man.

You see, there are women who have made plans in place for when they have children and how they plan to cushion their families.

Sadly, some haven't
And some would never

Why? Because everyone cannot be thesame.

It is well

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Nobody: 11:21pm On Jan 03, 2022
bigpicture001:
My girlfriend whom I have planned to settle down with simply started acting cold and eventually stylishly slide out of our relationship because I sat her down and made a family financial support proposal to her in which she will be financially committed to running the proposed family we intend to raise...

These are the proposal...

1. She earns about 80k wile I earn about 300k.. I asked that we jointly contribute for all the children's Career funding starting from when we get married even before any of their birth.. I proposed 10k monthly from her and 40k from me to a trust account. From it we plan to fund all the children's Career from kiddagatten to varsity or which ever path they choose..

2. That sh choose between Nepa bill or DStv or gotv sub monthly..just one for her

3. I will be responsible for rents

4. We pay into another joint account for vacation once in two years..like sh puts in 20k I put in 50k monthly..

5. I provide all the heavy food stuffs required in the house in large quantities including gas ND change of electronics, but sh provide all the daily food supplements to mk mine complete.

6. She buys her clothes ND I buy mine but we can both surprise ourselfs with gift to the other..

7. I will buy the family car ND maintain it. If she buys no p.

8. I didn't rule out surprise gifts once a while and outting which I bankroll ND expect her to do same occasionally..

Plz oo nairalanders are these responsibilities to a wife too much for her, I mean one who works and earn over 50k...?


Wat cam one do with 80k in this harsh time. Ur girl is wise to have left abeg...30k from 80k in savings while she pays dstv bill and buys her clothes...damn niggar..ur broke lol...go and hustle pls

16 Likes 5 Shares

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Nobody: 11:22pm On Jan 03, 2022
Ammishaddai:
Bros, God just saved you from the greatest mistake you would have made in this life. In fact, you should go to the altar and roll yourself like 7 times for letting her leave you in peace . And my advice for you is that you still stick to this plan with the next girlfriend you have . Anyone that does not want it should go and find the nearest Simpson or ATM machine that can dispense cash and carry all the burdens of their financial problems at once

Poor man talk

5 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by pompeiimagnus: 11:22pm On Jan 03, 2022
albankubi:
This is unrealistic. You are obviously not ready for marriage. If you can't foot the household bill 100 percent you have no right to claim a woman. Imagine if she gets pregnant and you still want her to keep working and spending on the family.

Let’s be real here, many pregnant women work even until labor day. This keeps them in peak physical condition for child birth. Y’all are trying to make it sound like pregnancy is such a surreal experience. The last time I checked, even our grandmothers went to the farm and market so they could financially contribute to raising their children, no matter how small that contribution was!!! This guy just proposed a plan and she ran away because she wanted an imaginary lifestyle when she clearly knew she was marrying a regular guy.
Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Nyenatetan(m): 11:22pm On Jan 03, 2022
Holluwhakemmy:
This story sounds somehow. It shows you are not going to be a responsible husband.

excuseme please, how do you define someone who is responsible


As one who would runaway whenever he or she's presented with a task which in turn is of the irinterest too

Kai ! Nawaooo lots of kidson this forum nowadays !

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by diplomat058(m): 11:23pm On Jan 03, 2022
DrFunmisticGlow:
continue waiting for handouts from a woman. Weakling
"Weakling," you say? That's how you opportunistic lots end up with narcissists who will pay all the bills (out of irrational ego), but always use heavy punches to redesign your facial architecture in the houses. Continue your search for the traditional macho man. Lol

3 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Olatara(f): 11:23pm On Jan 03, 2022
pompeiimagnus:


Do you know many family women in Nigeria don’t even earn up to 50k? Do they also not contribute to their family upkeep? This guy is a salary earner who can lose his job at anytime. Moreover this was only a “proposal”….

If she could not sit down and discuss with him now, then their marriage is doomed already. What’s the point of dating if she cannot have an educated discussion with her man Una funny sha
I know lots of women that take care of the family's bill, their husbands are either jobless or deadbeat, yet they don't make noise.

My aunt is an example (she earn more than her husband) and she carries almost all the bills yet she doesn't make a fuss about it

Guys of this generation eh especially some nairaland.

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Nobody: 11:23pm On Jan 03, 2022
lifenija:
she is selfish period. dust hand comot.

Untop 80k??kai poverty has ruined ur life

5 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Idamond: 11:24pm On Jan 03, 2022
Killermamba:


That is too much na, at least 20k from her is enough, she nor dey pay transport go work? She nor go eat or buy things for herself? Abi na u wan dey buy pad too? Or she nor get family to support? Guy this your plan be like say u nor wan her to progress at all.
So the man own come small bah, wat if house rent na 800k, car fueling enko, if u wan count the money they guy man wan spend I no think say him go get reach 50k monthly to use take care of himself.

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by MuteMute(m): 11:24pm On Jan 03, 2022
���
Op u no dey caring at all you suppose use this to test her first
You for allow her choose the cross she go carry and hear her view

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by enonche85(m): 11:27pm On Jan 03, 2022
zedegit:


I don't think you were considerate to be honest with you.

She has her own financial plans and would likely wish to have savings for her personal use and family upkeep because girls still uphold their families after marriage.

You just want to subdue her unnecessarily. It will take you time to marry and if any girl should agree to that Sharia law, it's only a matter of time before she calls off your bluff especially after child birth.
he never said she should spend all her salary on the family. She earns 80k, is 30k too much to contribute?. He earns 300k and will be responsible for house rent, car, all the hard food stuffs, contribute 4x of what he's asking her to bring on their children's education. By the time you do all the calculation of his contribution he will have little or nothing left for himself not forgetting that he may have siblings who are in school that he might be paying tuition fees for.
Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by pompeiimagnus: 11:27pm On Jan 03, 2022
If you conduct a real life survey of marriages, 7 out of 10 times, the man is the breadwinner. Your aunty and the women you know are the exceptions. That’s reality. Women get married to men who usually make far more than them.

Olatara:
I know lots of women that take care of the family's bill, their husbands are either jobless or deadbeat, yet they don't make noise.

My aunt is an example (she earn more than her husband) and she carries almost all the bills yet she doesn't make a fuss about it

Guys of this generation eh especially some nairaland.
Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by frankson1(m): 11:27pm On Jan 03, 2022
bigpicture001:


Thanks man.. heard from her friend that sh said am too stingy,.

Honestly I didn't make her spend up to 50k from her wage.. 300k is not big and can be exhausted soon..

The weight will be too much if I form the normal Nigerian guy who likes to carry load on their head



You didn't make her spend 50k indeed undecided
She will end up spending over 50k for family and what would be left for her personal use

You should be happy that she left instead of getting married and then renegade from your plans.

3 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by SoapQueen(f): 11:30pm On Jan 03, 2022
pompeiimagnus:
If you conduct a real life survey of marriages, 7 out of 10 times, the man is the breadwinner. Your aunty and the women you know are the exceptions. That’s reality. Women get married to men who usually make far more than them.


Untrue.

You'd be shocked to see the number of women picking up bills in their homes. Funny thing is that they don't even complain.

4 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Idamond: 11:31pm On Jan 03, 2022
UyaiIncomparabl:
You're not serious. Never split bills with a woman. Let her decide to pick up bills that she can afford. You seem very irresponsible.
You sound like someone with failed future marriage..
This one doesn't signify good Akwa ibomite at all

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Nyenatetan(m): 11:32pm On Jan 03, 2022
AmericanDad:


Poor man. You will remain poor in Jesus name

He shall forever swim in wealth, he shall see and reap the harvest of his Labour's , in the mightyName of God who created all things above and beneath, the God of truth, who created Eve ( the first woman. ) to be a helper to a man and not another responsibility to the list of a man's responsibilities through Christ ourLord Amen. angry angry angry angry angry
You're not representing your Moniker @AmericaDad
Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Idamond: 11:33pm On Jan 03, 2022
ImaIma1:
This op is a joke. This is something both of you should come up with together. You can't just create a plan and expect her to follow it. What kind of marriage will you have? You making the decisions first and telling her later?
Abeg pack one side read the post well..
Na propose, na for d lady to add her own remove the one she feel she no like

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by efosky1246(m): 11:36pm On Jan 03, 2022
bigpicture001:
My girlfriend whom I have planned to settle down with simply started acting cold and eventually stylishly slide out of our relationship because I sat her down and made a family financial support proposal to her in which she will be financially committed to running the proposed family we intend to raise...

These are the proposal...

1. She earns about 80k wile I earn about 300k.. I asked that we jointly contribute for all the children's Career funding starting from when we get married even before any of their birth.. I proposed 10k monthly from her and 40k from me to a trust account. From it we plan to fund all the children's Career from kiddagatten to varsity or which ever path they choose..

2. That sh choose between Nepa bill or DStv or gotv sub monthly..just one for her

3. I will be responsible for rents

4. We pay into another joint account for vacation once in two years..like sh puts in 20k I put in 50k monthly..

5. I provide all the heavy food stuffs required in the house in large quantities including gas ND change of electronics, but sh provide all the daily food supplements to mk mine complete.

6. She buys her clothes ND I buy mine but we can both surprise ourselfs with gift to the other..

7. I will buy the family car ND maintain it. If she buys no p.

8. I didn't rule out surprise gifts once a while and outting which I bankroll ND expect her to do same occasionally..

Plz oo nairalanders are these responsibilities to a wife too much for her, I mean one who works and earn over 50k...?


she dodged a bullet. a mule is what you're looking for. not a wife.

this is 80k for goodness sake. If at the barest minimum she spends 1K everyday on feeding and transport. 30k is gone. the contributions you demand of her will definitely finish the remaining 50k. she has nothing left to spend on herself as a woman or on miscellaneous expenses she doesn't want to bother you about. And in addition to all that she'll also be the one to cook and clean.

on top wetin?

what kind of a man are you? would you wish this on your sister?

You can't tell me you love that woman. this is a marriage of convenience for you. If you were earning a million you will not choose her. so let her be abeg.

Marriage is not by force, you're clearly not ready to create the lifestyle you want for your family hence why you need to depend on a woman. hustle more or find a woman earning 200k+ to work with this your budget.

N.B: If any alpha male wannabe devoid of common sense and cursed with a brain that can only formulate the word simp quotes me I will swear for you and your generation. this is a new year.

5 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Holluwhakemmy(f): 11:36pm On Jan 03, 2022
Nyenatetan:


excuseme please, how do you define someone who is responsible


As one who would runaway whenever he or she's presented with a task which in turn is of the irinterest too

Kai ! Nawaooo lots of kidson this forum nowadays !
who is your kid? Please mind your tongue .

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Talkamasebe: 11:37pm On Jan 03, 2022
bigpicture001


Bros listen!

1* You committed the greatest mistake, let me tell you the truth, in Africa and Nigeria as a Case Study, It is a Man who marries a woman. On your wedding day, you will promise to take good care of her, sitting a woman prior the marriage is telling her, she will take care of herself.

2* From 80k Salary... How reasonable it is for a sensible woman to drop 50k out 80k.... Say she wan marry. Am sure if u marry her and she became pregnant, and about to deliver and you were told is CS, your wife in pain will contribute abi! Listen u never reach age of marriage, enjoy your bachelorhood Wella.

3* Later same you will claim your wife is not submissive. But she contributes in every project or doings in the house.

Hear me, I have a wife and 4 Glorious Daughters, I av never share any family responsibility with her, yet she on her own buys d kids cloth, take them out on outing, she support in her little way.

Your wife is your help mate not Business Partner

Wake Up
3*









post=109048153:

My girlfriend whom I have planned to settle down with simply started acting cold and eventually stylishly slide out of our relationship because I sat her down and made a family financial support proposal to her in which she will be financially committed to running the proposed family we intend to raise...

These are the proposal...

1. She earns about 80k wile I earn about 300k.. I asked that we jointly contribute for all the children's Career funding starting from when we get married even before any of their birth.. I proposed 10k monthly from her and 40k from me to a trust account. From it we plan to fund all the children's Career from kiddagatten to varsity or which ever path they choose..

2. That sh choose between Nepa bill or DStv or gotv sub monthly..just one for her

3. I will be responsible for rents

4. We pay into another joint account for vacation once in two years..like sh puts in 20k I put in 50k monthly..

5. I provide all the heavy food stuffs required in the house in large quantities including gas ND change of electronics, but sh provide all the daily food supplements to mk mine complete.

6. She buys her clothes ND I buy mine but we can both surprise ourselfs with gift to the other..

7. I will buy the family car ND maintain it. If she buys no p.

8. I didn't rule out surprise gifts once again while and outting which I bankroll ND expect her to do same occasionally..

Plz oo nairalanders are these responsibilities to a wife too much for her, I mean one who works and earn over 50k...?

2 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Idamond: 11:42pm On Jan 03, 2022
Biglittlelois:
Man provides, woman helps

Division of labour;
Husband---- financial security
Wife-----household chores
Equation balanced

On no ground is anyone obligated to assist the other, it is a choice

If you want equal contribution, contribute in household chores and the kids

If you say house maid, no problem, get a work/financial help for yourself.

I'm very sure you only read bible index not the content
Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by JC2021: 11:42pm On Jan 03, 2022
Animegirl:
shocked

You don't even know "woman's need", that's why you did that rubbish list. That 80k, isn't enough as a lady talkless of family. Unless you want her to look like an hag, in her husband's house.

Worst, you haven't even settled down yet, you're placing small responsibilities on her head. Be calming down na.

If you want something like this, better find another woman who is willing to contribute to the family with higher earnings.
So running away is the right thing for her? I swear good women don too scarce to find nowadays.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Nyenatetan(m): 11:43pm On Jan 03, 2022
Holluwhakemmy:
who is your kid? Please mind your tongue .


Alright,
So how do you define Marriage ,

or

what do you understand when they say a man has found his missing rib.
Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Foscons(m): 11:44pm On Jan 03, 2022
Nice planning but you could have planned with her and let her be involved in the decision process herself.

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by Nobody: 11:44pm On Jan 03, 2022
AmericanDad:


Untop 80k??kai poverty has ruined ur life
u can try to help him out of the poverty, what do u think?
Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by NaijaCover(m): 11:45pm On Jan 03, 2022
bigpicture001:


Thanks man.. heard from her friend that sh said am too stingy,.

Honestly I didn't make her spend up to 50k from her wage.. 300k is not big and can be exhausted soon..

The weight will be too much if I form the normal Nigerian guy who likes to carry load on their head

What Is 300k In nigeria economy now? Spend More Than That In a Space Of One Week.

My Brother, Go And Thank God For saving you from that Lady
Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by GboyegaD(m): 11:45pm On Jan 03, 2022
bigpicture001:


Well, u might be saying the truth with this number 4, but I made her understand that marriage without traveling vacations will mk it very boring.. ND wen I say travel I mean within Nigeria resorts or very good African countries like Egypt, south Africa, Kenya Namibia etc.. if income increases we start trying over seas...


I huzle, she works with the FG ..

Oga, no let anybody guilt trip you. If she isn't comfortable, she should state it.

Let me teach you another method, agree to a percentage of income that should go into family wallet and what that means is everything is invested and bought from that account.
Re: My Girlfriend Ran Away Because Of My Proposed Family Financial Plan by brumie(f): 11:46pm On Jan 03, 2022
Well we are all humans with different mind-set . To me running was not the best solution she should have let you know that she can't do it or rule out some of the things she can't do. Thou it's annoying to even tell her all that at first. To me I don't tink any woman in her right sense will leave all the financial responsibility to her husband while she is earning. So I will say you both did not do well.

1 Like 1 Share

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