₦airaland Forum

Biglittlelois:
Learn to read and comprehend.

Nwachi22:
Op, since you’re sharing the bills, I hope you will also share the house chores with her and assist her to carry pregnancy. I don’t know why men of nowadays now run away from their responsibilities.
Marriage is about what each partner will benefit not love anymore.

bigpicture001:
Do u know I removed health insurance cover which only me will open an account for and it will cover every member of the household including herself .?

300k is not a big money

pompeiimagnus:
As someone who works, I’m sure you know the mental and physical stress it takes to earn a decent living in Nigeria. Men and women don’t have it easy as you clearly know. It is a smart decision to have financial discussions with your man before even getting married.

Number of kids and finances are discussions that must be had, else you guys are going into that marriage with deception. If you intend on staying at home to look after the kids, I think you should be honest with your man about your this too. If you and your man cannot have these discussions before getting married, do you really think marriage and kids would make it easier

bigpicture001:
My girlfriend whom I have planned to settle down with simply started acting cold and eventually stylishly slide out of our relationship because I sat her down and made a family financial support proposal to her in which she will be financially committed to running the proposed family we intend to raise...

These are the proposal...

1. She earns about 80k wile I earn about 300k.. I asked that we jointly contribute for all the children's Career funding starting from when we get married even before any of their birth.. I proposed 10k monthly from her and 40k from me to a trust account. From it we plan to fund all the children's Career from kiddagatten to varsity or which ever path they choose..

2. That sh choose between Nepa bill or DStv or gotv sub monthly..just one for her

3. I will be responsible for rents

4. We pay into another joint account for vacation once in two years..like sh puts in 20k I put in 50k monthly..

5. I provide all the heavy food stuffs required in the house in large quantities including gas ND change of electronics, but sh provide all the daily food supplements to mk mine complete.

6. She buys her clothes ND I buy mine but we can both surprise ourselfs with gift to the other..

7. I will buy the family car ND maintain it. If she buys no p.

8. I didn't rule out surprise gifts once a while and outting which I bankroll ND expect her to do same occasionally..

Plz oo nairalanders are these responsibilities to a wife too much for her, I mean one who works and earn over 50k...?

Ammishaddai:
Bros, God just saved you from the greatest mistake you would have made in this life. In fact, you should go to the altar and roll yourself like 7 times for letting her leave you in peace . And my advice for you is that you still stick to this plan with the next girlfriend you have . Anyone that does not want it should go and find the nearest Simpson or ATM machine that can dispense cash and carry all the burdens of their financial problems at once

albankubi:
This is unrealistic. You are obviously not ready for marriage. If you can't foot the household bill 100 percent you have no right to claim a woman. Imagine if she gets pregnant and you still want her to keep working and spending on the family.

Holluwhakemmy:
This story sounds somehow. It shows you are not going to be a responsible husband.

excuseme please, how do you define someone who is responsible


As one who would runaway whenever he or she's presented with a task which in turn is of the irinterest too

Kai ! Nawaooo lots of kidson this forum nowadays !

DrFunmisticGlow:
continue waiting for handouts from a woman. Weakling

pompeiimagnus:
Do you know many family women in Nigeria don’t even earn up to 50k? Do they also not contribute to their family upkeep? This guy is a salary earner who can lose his job at anytime. Moreover this was only a “proposal”….

If she could not sit down and discuss with him now, then their marriage is doomed already. What’s the point of dating if she cannot have an educated discussion with her man Una funny sha

lifenija:
she is selfish period. dust hand comot.

Killermamba:
That is too much na, at least 20k from her is enough, she nor dey pay transport go work? She nor go eat or buy things for herself? Abi na u wan dey buy pad too? Or she nor get family to support? Guy this your plan be like say u nor wan her to progress at all.

zedegit:
I don't think you were considerate to be honest with you.

She has her own financial plans and would likely wish to have savings for her personal use and family upkeep because girls still uphold their families after marriage.

You just want to subdue her unnecessarily. It will take you time to marry and if any girl should agree to that Sharia law, it's only a matter of time before she calls off your bluff especially after child birth.

Olatara:
I know lots of women that take care of the family's bill, their husbands are either jobless or deadbeat, yet they don't make noise.

My aunt is an example (she earn more than her husband) and she carries almost all the bills yet she doesn't make a fuss about it

Guys of this generation eh especially some nairaland.

bigpicture001:
Thanks man.. heard from her friend that sh said am too stingy,.

Honestly I didn't make her spend up to 50k from her wage.. 300k is not big and can be exhausted soon..

The weight will be too much if I form the normal Nigerian guy who likes to carry load on their head

pompeiimagnus:
If you conduct a real life survey of marriages, 7 out of 10 times, the man is the breadwinner. Your aunty and the women you know are the exceptions. That’s reality. Women get married to men who usually make far more than them.

UyaiIncomparabl:
You're not serious. Never split bills with a woman. Let her decide to pick up bills that she can afford. You seem very irresponsible.

AmericanDad:
Poor man. You will remain poor in Jesus name

He shall forever swim in wealth, he shall see and reap the harvest of his Labour's , in the mightyName of God who created all things above and beneath, the God of truth, who created Eve ( the first woman. ) to be a helper to a man and not another responsibility to the list of a man's responsibilities through Christ ourLord Amen.
You're not representing your Moniker @AmericaDad

ImaIma1:
This op is a joke. This is something both of you should come up with together. You can't just create a plan and expect her to follow it. What kind of marriage will you have? You making the decisions first and telling her later?

bigpicture001:
My girlfriend whom I have planned to settle down with simply started acting cold and eventually stylishly slide out of our relationship because I sat her down and made a family financial support proposal to her in which she will be financially committed to running the proposed family we intend to raise...

These are the proposal...

1. She earns about 80k wile I earn about 300k.. I asked that we jointly contribute for all the children's Career funding starting from when we get married even before any of their birth.. I proposed 10k monthly from her and 40k from me to a trust account. From it we plan to fund all the children's Career from kiddagatten to varsity or which ever path they choose..

2. That sh choose between Nepa bill or DStv or gotv sub monthly..just one for her

3. I will be responsible for rents

4. We pay into another joint account for vacation once in two years..like sh puts in 20k I put in 50k monthly..

5. I provide all the heavy food stuffs required in the house in large quantities including gas ND change of electronics, but sh provide all the daily food supplements to mk mine complete.

6. She buys her clothes ND I buy mine but we can both surprise ourselfs with gift to the other..

7. I will buy the family car ND maintain it. If she buys no p.

8. I didn't rule out surprise gifts once a while and outting which I bankroll ND expect her to do same occasionally..

Plz oo nairalanders are these responsibilities to a wife too much for her, I mean one who works and earn over 50k...?

Nyenatetan:
excuseme please, how do you define someone who is responsible


As one who would runaway whenever he or she's presented with a task which in turn is of the irinterest too

Kai ! Nawaooo lots of kidson this forum nowadays !

Biglittlelois:
Man provides, woman helps

Division of labour;
Husband---- financial security
Wife-----household chores
Equation balanced

On no ground is anyone obligated to assist the other, it is a choice

If you want equal contribution, contribute in household chores and the kids

If you say house maid, no problem, get a work/financial help for yourself.

Animegirl:


You don't even know "woman's need", that's why you did that rubbish list. That 80k, isn't enough as a lady talkless of family. Unless you want her to look like an hag, in her husband's house.

Worst, you haven't even settled down yet, you're placing small responsibilities on her head. Be calming down na.

If you want something like this, better find another woman who is willing to contribute to the family with higher earnings.

Holluwhakemmy:
who is your kid? Please mind your tongue .

Alright,
So how do you define Marriage ,

or

what do you understand when they say a man has found his missing rib.

AmericanDad:
Untop 80k??kai poverty has ruined ur life

bigpicture001:
Thanks man.. heard from her friend that sh said am too stingy,.

Honestly I didn't make her spend up to 50k from her wage.. 300k is not big and can be exhausted soon..

The weight will be too much if I form the normal Nigerian guy who likes to carry load on their head

bigpicture001:
Well, u might be saying the truth with this number 4, but I made her understand that marriage without traveling vacations will mk it very boring.. ND wen I say travel I mean within Nigeria resorts or very good African countries like Egypt, south Africa, Kenya Namibia etc.. if income increases we start trying over seas...


I huzle, she works with the FG ..