Lee99:
Hey Nlanders, I'll be as brief as possible. So I met my current gf mid October 2021, she's sweet and loving though very stubborn and has an I don't care attitude. I'm trying to change her and she's a work in progress.

But lately, all she talks about is having a baby, she wants to be pregnant so bad, and I'm not ready for fatherhood or the challenges with it. I like her a lot but mehn I don't understand her again, she's hellbent on this pregnancy stuff.

According to her, anything that makes her take in she's gonna keep the baby whether I like it or not, when she saw her period last time it was a huge sigh of relief from my part, now I've nutted more times in her than I care to count and I hope they were blanks because I honestly don't want to deal with it, tho if it happens that way I'll have to man up and take charge of things, I only hope she gets her period soon then I can start using protection whenever we have sex, whether she likes it or not.

Bashing is allowed but try to make small sense please.

One of the reasons why I don't blame men looking for virgins!! Lost count of number of sex with someone you met in less than 3months?? the word relationship really has no value in this part of the world!
Well I only see an idiot who will soon become a babyfather to a retired olosho.

Lee99:

So I will wait for years before shaping her into a woman I want her to be?

Oga, you can't change a woman..
If she is stubborn with I don't care
Attitudes then I promise you it will only get worse...

An elder once said "the red flags we ignore in the early stage of a relationship are the very same reasons we quit later, after so much unnecessary tolerance.."

Never wish to change a person..
Instead, date or marry a person that you wouldnt need to change anything in them..
The onlybthing u have to do tonur woman is package her with goodies..
Let her attitude be pure from the foundation

Who've nutted in her more times you can count, yet u don't want her to get pregnant, it's like saying you want to enter rain without umbrella and u don't want to get wet. Abeg dey wear condom o, apart from pregnancy, STI dey o because 4 months is too short

Please depart from your devilish act destroying people's daughter, if you don't want to have a family why sex. This is just a sign that you're playing with your life. This girl might harm someday, due to the feeling of her being used.

HarunaWest:

You met a lady october and you are talking about pregnancy. Oga are you sure all is well

na wa o just 3months, something is wrong

Please depart from your devilish act of destroying people's daughter, if you don't want to have a family why sex. This is just a sign that you're playing with your life. This girl might harm someday, due to the feeling of her being used.

Does she have yansh?

Lee99:

It means there are certain character traits she exhibits that I'm not comfortable with and rather than abandon her and move to the next available girl I'd rather work on her to change because those traits are changeable

Hmmm, I like the way you think.

But why is fathering a baby not in your plan?

Is it going to be only you that would be financially responsible for the baby? If yes, I support you not wanting to impregnate her.

Lee99:
Hey Nlanders, I'll be as brief as possible. So I met my current gf mid October 2021, she's sweet and loving though very stubborn and has an I don't care attitude. I'm trying to change her and she's a work in progress.

But lately, all she talks about is having a baby, she wants to be pregnant so bad, and I'm not ready for fatherhood or the challenges with it. I like her a lot but mehn I don't understand her again, she's hellbent on this pregnancy stuff.

According to her, anything that makes her take in she's gonna keep the baby whether I like it or not, when she saw her period last time it was a huge sigh of relief from my part, now I've nutted more times in her than I care to count and I hope they were blanks because I honestly don't want to deal with it, tho if it happens that way I'll have to man up and take charge of things, I only hope she gets her period soon then I can start using protection whenever we have sex, whether she likes it or not.

Bashing is allowed but try to make small sense please.

Her desperation could be secretly born out of fear of Infertility.
If you know you know.

Lee99:

That last part really hit me, you've spoken well, I guess I'm feeling trapped at the moment and my biggest concern is the fact that she doesn't care about my opinion on the issue, as for taking care of the child she's very hardworking and runs her own business and I'm aware of the savings she has, also she's not the demanding type, financially she's independent and hardly asks for money from me, I give her when I feel like and she doesn't complain, aside from the whole pregnancy issue she's cool. But at the same time you can't force or blackmail me into something as serious as having a baby

OP, you mentioned that she was born in July. That makes her Cancerian or Leo. Either way, she probably has strong Cancerian aspects somewhere in her makeup.

The point in all of these, is that Cancerians have really strong maternal instincts, stronger in fact than the average, which means that the whole concept of mothering and being a mother matter very strongly to her. Which also means that she may not actually be trying to blackmail you; she is simply wired that way - to want to have a child.

That said, be very careful how you interprete and apply all the advice you are getting online. The shoes you wear are yours and nobody else's so tread carefully.

You sound young, probably still in your twenties and you haven't stated the levels of education of both yourself and your girl. That said, you describe her as someone who who has her head screwed on right.

If she feels right, and she shows she is willing to learn and change, and most importantly [/b]you both go well together[b] and you are both comfortable with each other take the relationship for a spin and see how things go.

Give it your all, and try to verify she is also giving it her all. You will want to test how compatible you are in areas, but, one thing I can tell you for sure is, when a cancerian woman loves you, you will stay loved.

If however you feel it isn't going right, don't string her along - let her go.

I've gone through comments page by page and I cannot answer all my mentions but I will put it all out here.
1. She is willing to be financially responsible for the child whether I choose to be or not
2. She is financially stable
3. I am also financially stable, I have a Job, I have an apartment I rent and I have a car
4. I can take care of a child no doubt what I am saying is I prefer to not have one at the time because I'm working on myself
5. I guess with time she will change for the better because I see some of her acts as immature
6. She told me today that she's too in love with me but is willing to accept if I don't want to be there in the event that she is pregnant
7. God has nothing to do with this for those masturbating about fornication and the likes

Uncle96:
Dont sweat it, its normal to shape a woman into what you want her to be , a few courses can be corrected ... you put her on the right tracks where shes wrong.

See delusion!

elganzar:
EVERYONE should be open to change (in certain areas of life), rigidity is an all mark of foolishness...

Working together requires compromise__ still change

Being open to change is one thing, but trying to change another to suit your personal taste is something altogether foolish!

SmartPolician:
Forget that nonsense we were often told: People change people. In fact, if a girl genuinely likes you, changing her can happen with a speed of light.

However, one mistake that nobody should make is marrying someone with an attitude they hate in the hopes that marriage would change them. It's a no-no.

Again, being open to change is one thing but trying to change someone else you suit your taste and desire is an entirely different and foolish endeavor.

Kobojunkie:
And who told you that a woman is changeable? She is an adult like you so why do you believe you are meant to change her to suit your taste?

You are instead supposed to both work together as a team not change each other.

Sorry but you're refusing to make sense. Two people together changes each other.

Be careful make she no carry person belle come give you oh
Just make her understand why you don't want a child for now and if she's not working to assist you then Bruh just sack her in a respectful way and move on. Leave the shaping to another.

Lee99:
Hey Nlanders, I'll be as brief as possible. So I met my current gf mid October 2021, she's sweet and loving though very stubborn and has an I don't care attitude. I'm trying to change her and she's a work in progress.

But lately, all she talks about is having a baby, she wants to be pregnant so bad, and I'm not ready for fatherhood or the challenges with it. I like her a lot but mehn I don't understand her again, she's hellbent on this pregnancy stuff.

According to her, anything that makes her take in she's gonna keep the baby whether I like it or not, when she saw her period last time it was a huge sigh of relief from my part, now I've nutted more times in her than I care to count and I hope they were blanks because I honestly don't want to deal with it, tho if it happens that way I'll have to man up and take charge of things, I only hope she gets her period soon then I can start using protection whenever we have sex, whether she likes it or not.

Bashing is allowed but try to make small sense please.

Oga you be bricklayer? Which one is work-in-progress? Don't come and do 'hide my identity' later o

Heterodox:
Sorry but you're refusing to make sense. Two people together changes each other.

Again, being open to change is one thing but trying to change another person to suit your taste and desire is an entirely different and foolish endeavor

Lee99:
Hey Nlanders, I'll be as brief as possible. So I met my current gf mid October 2021, she's sweet and loving though very stubborn and has an I don't care attitude. I'm trying to change her and she's a work in progress.

But lately, all she talks about is having a baby, she wants to be pregnant so bad, and I'm not ready for fatherhood or the challenges with it. I like her a lot but mehn I don't understand her again, she's hellbent on this pregnancy stuff.

According to her, anything that makes her take in she's gonna keep the baby whether I like it or not, when she saw her period last time it was a huge sigh of relief from my part, now I've nutted more times in her than I care to count and I hope they were blanks because I honestly don't want to deal with it, tho if it happens that way I'll have to man up and take charge of things, I only hope she gets her period soon then I can start using protection whenever we have sex, whether she likes it or not.

Bashing is allowed but try to make small sense please.

You don't want a baby but you are busy nutting inside her, are you a special type of clown?

Kobojunkie:
Being open to change is one thing, but trying to change another to suit your personal taste is something altogether foolish!

It's the lady's call__it's up to her to decide if what they share is worth the compromise or not

Let me add; as fu!ked up as it may sound_ it's what we all do, for the one's we love...

Both of you are committing sin, if she wants to be pregnant, let it be legal, marry her.

elganzar:
It's the lady's call__it's up to her to decide if what they share is worth the compromise or not

Let me add; as fu!ked up as it may sound_ it's what we all do, for the one's we love...

That's instead the delusion that many of you confuse with love. Same as thinking of believing love will cause others to change on your behalf!

You can only change yourself, you cannot change anyone else!

Ticking time bomb..........

Kobojunkie:
Shape her into the woman you want? What in the world does that even mean?

A woman is not a suit you tailor to fit you. You either accept her as you met her or you move on to find another that best fits you as-is.

Op don't listen to this trash


It's either your way or nothing. They do worse when the tables reverse

Lee99:
Hey Nlanders, I'll be as brief as possible. So I met my current gf mid October 2021, she's sweet and loving though very stubborn and has an I don't care attitude. I'm trying to change her and she's a work in progress.

But lately, all she talks about is having a baby, she wants to be pregnant so bad, and I'm not ready for fatherhood or the challenges with it. I like her a lot but mehn I don't understand her again, she's hellbent on this pregnancy stuff.

According to her, anything that makes her take in she's gonna keep the baby whether I like it or not, when she saw her period last time it was a huge sigh of relief from my part, now I've nutted more times in her than I care to count and I hope they were blanks because I honestly don't want to deal with it, tho if it happens that way I'll have to man up and take charge of things, I only hope she gets her period soon then I can start using protection whenever we have sex, whether she likes it or not.

Bashing is allowed but try to make small sense please.

You never see anything

Once she has made up her mind, she will definitely trick you to get pregnant

No be woman, they don't miss their targets

Lee99:

That last part really hit me, you've spoken well, I guess I'm feeling trapped at the moment and my biggest concern is the fact that she doesn't care about my opinion on the issue, as for taking care of the child she's very hardworking and runs her own business and I'm aware of the savings she has, also she's not the demanding type, financially she's independent and hardly asks for money from me, I give her when I feel like and she doesn't complain, aside from the whole pregnancy issue she's cool. But at the same time you can't force or blackmail me into something as serious as having a baby

Nice potential baby mama you got there. Send her number

Lee99:

So I will wait for years before shaping her into a woman I want her to be?

4months is too early to study and understand her , Girls can pretend use condom to catch ur cruise

Lee99:
Hey Nlanders, I'll be as brief as possible. So I met my current gf mid October 2021, she's sweet and loving though very stubborn and has an I don't care attitude. I'm trying to change her and she's a work in progress.

But lately, all she talks about is having a baby, she wants to be pregnant so bad, and I'm not ready for fatherhood or the challenges with it. I like her a lot but mehn I don't understand her again, she's hellbent on this pregnancy stuff.

According to her, anything that makes her take in she's gonna keep the baby whether I like it or not, when she saw her period last time it was a huge sigh of relief from my part, now I've nutted more times in her than I care to count and I hope they were blanks because I honestly don't want to deal with it, tho if it happens that way I'll have to man up and take charge of things, I only hope she gets her period soon then I can start using protection whenever we have sex, whether she likes it or not.

Bashing is allowed but try to make small sense please.

maybe your income is good and ur environment is nice , ladies will always want to die there ,

Kobojunkie:
Again, being open to change is one thing but trying to change another person to suit your taste and desire is an entirely different and foolish endeavor

Is the mannerism. If it's cohesive it's bad.

Heterodox:
Is the mannerism. If it's cohesive it's bad.

Mannerisms?

As far as relationships are concerned, the one who is meant to compromise is the one who notices a a fault with the other, not the one with the fault. If you notice a fault in your partner and are unwilling to change yourself to accommodate that fault aka compromise your own standards, you should probably consider exiting the relationship to find someone you are better able to tolerate.

Attempting to change others to suit your taste is a very silly way to go at a relationship.

Kobojunkie:
Mannerisms?

As far as relationships are concerned, the one who is meant to compromise is the one who notices a a fault with the other, not the one with the fault. If you notice a fault in your partner and are unwilling to change yourself to accommodate that fault aka compromise your own standards, you should probably consider exiting the relationship to find someone you are better able to tolerate.

Attempting to change others to suit your taste is a very silly way to go at a relationship.

Read what you wrote again


Once you're done, if you make sense, then have a nice day.