uthlaw:
DSC7
Bukolaberry
Hungerbadoo
Haakeem
Rick9
Athemisia
Marvellously
Success1991
Jaydasilva10
Zeel007
Young brymo
Quadri956DSC7
Abeg make ena start pack our chairs and canopies let move to CHRONICLES OF A PASTOR THAT ORDAINED HIMSELF!

uthlaw:
DSC7
Bukolaberry
Hungerbadoo
Haakeem
Rick9
Athemisia
Marvellously
Success1991
Jaydasilva10
Zeel007
Young brymo
Quadri956
Abeg make ena start pack our chairs and canopies let move to CHRONICLES OF A PASTOR THAT ORDAINED HIMSELF!

dodoatirice:
Na that day i know say mad men dey waka, we trekked for like forever, worst part was, people were looking at us. These mad people, they picked trash, gave me bread that they kept in their dirty Coffers and made sure i ate it. At night, we went to an uncompleted building where they slept and waited till the last one of them dozed. I tiptoed from the number of mad sleeping bodies scattered around the space they slept in and off i ran into the night! I trekked and trekked first i located the prayer center, thankfully, it was opened perfect. I went inside and slept on one of the prayer maths.. i was really spent and all my body was encircled with pain from the whips of mad men.. it didn’t take long, i dozed off completely. I then transitioned into the dream world. In my dream, i was in a court room and the judge was the only person I haven’t met or seen in my life in reality. The rest of the room too consisted of other faces I didn’t know. Baba was there too but in a separate dock. Then the judge who i thought his voice was a little too loud started proceedings.

Judge:
And why have you come before me??
(He asked gesturing at me)

Me:
Hum Sir, I don’t know, do i have any business here? And what is this place?

Judge:
This is the midway point between life and death, tormented souls bring their cases here when they want revenge for the brutal murder of their bodies and forceful takeover of their destinies by barbaric human-people that the Almighty created but went astray. Your being here is no coincidence and here you have no lawyer/attorney to stand your case for you or talk for you, you do the talking and defending by yourself. So i ask a question, you give the answers because you were there, you know if you did it or not do you understand!!

Me:
Yes I do.

Judge:
Very good, you learn so fast..
Shall we start?
(Gestures to someone in the open courtroom)
Bring in all the souls that lodged a case against this man)

Then the door opens and people trooped in in their numbers, all the people i used

Mumsy
Jago
Shade
The albinos
The corpse i was sleeping with their dead bodies
Etc

(You all know about it as i mentioned in previous updates)

All the people i used they filled the long dock and i looked back at Mr judge and his mouth was wide agape!!

Bukolaberry:
like seriously, everywhere is set, chairs arranged, canopy set even pop corn and zobo dey available, yahoo boy story dey learn for that pastor mather, we don start the story since, you are all welcome DSC7 please usher them.

dodoatirice:
Judge:
Wait you mean to say only you used all of these people?

Me:
(I was going to answer in the affirmative, i just sight baba!! In the courtroom looking unbothered and unworried)
I didn’t know it will get to these numbers, but it was me and him (pointing to Baba that perpetrated the act, He told me what to do and i agreed to getting it done.

Judge:
You don’t come before me and shift blames. When it gets to (pointing at Baba) he will answer.

Then the said judge gave everyone me and Baba used a fair hearing and one by one they narrated the gruesome murder from the hands of me and Baba. The last to talk was a kid, a baby that could talk?? He introduced himself and narrated how i connived with a nurse to steal is placenta thereby causing his demise the same day he was born. Getting to my mums Turn,
She just couldn’t say a thing, she spent the whole time the judge gave her to stare at me and even at that, she tried to say a word but just couldn’t find the words.

Judge:
(Looking in my direction) What do you have to say to yourself now stupid)

Me:
Nothing.

Judge:
okay, let me get to you in a bit!!
World best Babalawo?
World best Babalawo??

No response from Baba as He seemed lost in thoughts then Judge produced all those long flexible whips and from where he sat, he weaved the whip and twaiii.

Baba:
Yeeeeeeeeeeeee! Yeeeeeeeh!
Ahn, una don sentence me?

Judge:
I know say you know where you dey sha?
I hope say you know say this no be merr dream sha?

Baba:
I know i know chai!!

Judge:
Very good, oya explain why you use a whole football team fo juju.

Baba:
Chaaaaaaaaaaiye!!
Na him come meet me…

Judge:
(Cuts in sharp)
Abi na him friend wey you first do ritual for bring am
Which one??

Baba:
I forget.. na true.. na him friend carry am come!!

Judge:
Oh so wan take me play small?
Raises the whip again
(Twai! twai!! twai!!!)

Baba then goes about crying out a rap album of wailings. Chai maybe this whip was different from the one Spiritual Dss used on us both, or Spiritual sars!! I no know i sha know say, that whip no go touch me for here as i gat speak the truth!! But the thing touch Baba well well even for my dream. Baba weeped uncontrollably like a kid, and i felt like buying him a candy to keep quiet.

uthlaw:
DSC7
Bukolaberry
Hungerbadoo
Haakeem
Rick9
Athemisia
Marvellously
Success1991
Jaydasilva10
Zeel007
Young brymo
Quadri956
Abeg make ena start pack our chairs and canopies let move to CHRONICLES OF A PASTOR THAT ORDAINED HIMSELF!

uthlaw:
DSC7
Rick9
Abeg make ena start pack our chairs and canopies let move to CHRONICLES OF A PASTOR THAT ORDAINED HIMSELF!

Rick9:
I dey oh. I don refresh tire.

dodoatirice:

Chai!!

Rick9:
you are blessed my boss. I greet you.

dodoatirice:
I slept off again in the prayer center and this time i saw my mum hovering around our family house, the. She caught me staring at her and asked me to come. I obliged and then we both sat in-front of her old shop and spoke to me. She wanted me to go to her family members, her brothers, sisters, uncles and aunts and tell them the atrocities i committed and how i used her for money. The same people that almost lynched me when Mum died?? Then i woke up because Big Alfa was already around in the center and tapping me to wake up. I was about telling him my dream when He beat me to it! He repeated the same thing as my mum told me in the dream and it had to be done like asap or else….I explained to Big Alfa what happened the last time out i went there when the shit was still very fresh. The same way i went there that they almost lynched me was the same way I’d return there and take whatever came out of it he said. the last time i went there, i went as a big boi. But now I’m supposed to go there to go and beg for forgiveness, not as a big Boi as regards the last time out, but as a broke boi. Cuz i had no access to cars like i did before and no cash to carry around except the single btc wallet i hid somewhere in my mind. I just couldn’t wrap my head around the thoughts of going to beg these people made me more sad. Like i dey go my former hood, hood wey i don do beeza beeza there, hood wey be say so many parents don use me do case example for their pikin them.

“mama call me say Chinedu is balling”

Parents that saw how i flunged money from the rooftop of my Benzo and wished their children would follow suit in the game and eradicate the poverty wey don hold their generation for decades of the family linage. I hope by the time i get to my hood and they see me, their kids would still remain grounded if not, egungu gat be careful because express no dey respect anybody.





Big Alfa promised to give me the cash for the travel and early morning the next day, i set out on a one man army mission to alimosho in Ikotun from Omu Aran in Kwara state. As the bus traveled, naim we pass Oyedepo house, damn!! All the money wey i collect, my lekki house wey i buy for roughly 90m come be like security post if you put am side to side with Oyedepo’s infact make i add all the money wey i don collect join, i no fit afford this kind edifice. People get money oooo Chai. Took awhile but i arrived Lagos. Got in a bus headed for Ikotun and it moved. I alighted at ikotun market which was the last bustop. I was going to jump into a tricycle that was heading to Abaranje road when out of nowhere, one popular werey wey dey route ikotun market just show from nowhere come grab my jalabia say me i dey owe am money. This mentally deranged man held onto my clothing and even said if i failed to pay him his money, he will beat me. Then people gathered around asking the mad fellow to leave me alone. It was at that point i knew his name was Abayo. But this guy no gree at all, he was raving and raging. They asked him how much i was owing him and he said twenty kobo.. we don’t even spend kobo or coins anymore.. is this one mad? Oh he’s mad actually i forgot. Na so i change am for the werey, drag my jalabia forcefully from him but he wasn’t letting go naim i give am straight punch for mouth. Then his grip loosened on my apparel because he had to deal with the pain my fist inflicted. Abayo then grabbed a meat cutting knife from a meat hawker that stood to observe the unfolding drama. On seeing this, naim i tear race, market scatter. But bross, mad people sabi run.

dodoatirice:


Abayo take knife pursue me from ikotun market enter an area in ikotun called ‘agbo Ile’ the kings palace (oba ikotun) Oba Ashiwaju. I ran into the palace and surprisingly, Abayo didn’t. He just stood at the entrance trying to catch breathe. And after a while left threatening that if he sees me again, he will kill me. Chai!! Na beg them say make we come beg, na mad man dey threaten person. While walking awsy, he even added “that my money wey you owe me, you go pay” having explained to the palace guards how the interaction with Abayo started, they let me go and told me to be more careful. Outside the kings palace, i quickly stopped a bike that took me away from the palace area for fear of Abayo hanging around somewhere. The bike then dropped me off at the family house and the first person i saw outside was my sworn enemy in the family. The Olori Ebi.

Bukolaberry:
like seriously, everywhere is set, chairs arranged, canopy set even pop corn and zobo dey available, yahoo boy story dey learn for that pastor mather, we don start the story since, you are all welcome DSC7 please usher them.

uthlaw:
DSC7
Bukolaberry
Hungerbadoo
Haakeem
Rick9
Athemisia
Marvellously
Success1991
Jaydasilva10
Zeel007
Young brymo
Quadri956
Abeg make ena start pack our chairs and canopies let move to CHRONICLES OF A PASTOR THAT ORDAINED HIMSELF!

Epeegee:



Tell us the name of your family House,I wan know who u be today today,all this place nah my hood inside Ikotun


Lucifer 03 noSalary squad inside Ikotun

Epeegee:



Tell us the name of your family House,I wan know who u be today today,all this place nah my hood inside Ikotun


Lucifer 03 noSalary squad inside Ikotun

DSC7:


...
You go wait tire

uthlaw:
DSC7
Bukolaberry
Hungerbadoo
Haakeem
Rick9
Athemisia
Marvellously
Success1991
Jaydasilva10
Zeel007
Young brymo
Quadri956
Abeg make ena start pack our chairs and canopies let move to CHRONICLES OF A PASTOR THAT ORDAINED HIMSELF!

DSC7:



...

You go wait tire

dodoatiricetwo:
Nairaland mods and controversy.. how can i be spamming my own thread?

Guys they banned dodo

Bukolaberry:
like seriously, everywhere is set, chairs arranged, canopy set even pop corn and zobo dey available, yahoo boy story dey learn for that pastor mather, we don start the story since, you are all welcome DSC7 please usher them.

uthlaw:
DSC7
Bukolaberry
Hungerbadoo
Haakeem
Rick9
Athemisia
Marvellously
Success1991
Jaydasilva10
Zeel007
Young brymo
Quadri956
Abeg make ena start pack our chairs and canopies let move to CHRONICLES OF A PASTOR THAT ORDAINED HIMSELF!

Hungerbadoo:
Please can you reserve three bags of pop corn and ten liter of zobo for me. Na coaster i carry the come and people choke inside.

Epeegee:



Comrade no bring violence o,Abeg nah play o,but he dey mention my hood,