Poswahala:
Guys I genuinely need some advice
Because of the state of my mental health I have decided never to get married or have kids.

I suffer from intense depression and anxiety and other mental health problems. I'm unsure of my own future talk more of a child.

I do love being in relationships but I do that only for companionship and sex.

I don't know if I will regret my decision. The guys I have dated have been cool with my no marriage proposal but I don't think any Nigerian man will not want kids.

I'm thinking of moving to another country, buy a house, take care of my community and neighbors then when I'm old, I will move to a retirement home.

If I change my mind I can adopt a child, am not against adoption as I am with marriage, it depends on if my mental health improves.

The problem I have is that will I be lonely without a child, like I said I'm not into marriage despite being a woman trained in traditional home, it's not that I hate it or anything, it's not just for me. I will be unhappy being married.

But the child thing is bothering me, I always wanted a child, but i don't want my mental health to prevent me from loving and caring for the child.

Please advise.

Your problem is psychological meet a councilor!

Poswahala:
Guys I genuinely need some advice
Because of the state of my mental health I have decided never to get married or have kids.

I suffer from intense depression and anxiety and other mental health problems. I'm unsure of my own future talk more of a child.

I do love being in relationships but I do that only for companionship and sex.

I don't know if I will regret my decision. The guys I have dated have been cool with my no marriage proposal but I don't think any Nigerian man will not want kids.

I'm thinking of moving to another country, buy a house, take care of my community and neighbors then when I'm old, I will move to a retirement home.

If I change my mind I can adopt a child, am not against adoption as I am with marriage, it depends on if my mental health improves.

The problem I have is that will I be lonely without a child, like I said I'm not into marriage despite being a woman trained in traditional home, it's not that I hate it or anything, it's not just for me. I will be unhappy being married.

But the child thing is bothering me, I always wanted a child, but i don't want my mental health to prevent me from loving and caring for the child.

Please advise.

the decision will cause nothing but regrets. It is okay if you choose not to get married, nobody can be forced to, but having kids of your own should be considered either through surrogacy or simply adoption at a very young age..

Poswahala:
Guys I genuinely need some advice
Because of the state of my mental health I have decided never to get married or have kids.

I suffer from intense depression and anxiety and other mental health problems. I'm unsure of my own future talk more of a child.

I do love being in relationships but I do that only for companionship and sex.

I don't know if I will regret my decision. The guys I have dated have been cool with my no marriage proposal but I don't think any Nigerian man will not want kids.

I'm thinking of moving to another country, buy a house, take care of my community and neighbors then when I'm old, I will move to a retirement home.

If I change my mind I can adopt a child, am not against adoption as I am with marriage, it depends on if my mental health improves.

The problem I have is that will I be lonely without a child, like I said I'm not into marriage despite being a woman trained in traditional home, it's not that I hate it or anything, it's not just for me. I will be unhappy being married.

But the child thing is bothering me, I always wanted a child, but i don't want my mental health to prevent me from loving and caring for the child.

Please advise.

Lower your expectations in a relationship. That's when it becomes sweet. When u need too much n have high expectations relationship is hell. That rich j handsome guy has 100 people that wish to be his. So that's competition. Embrace life the way u see it. If u short that's doesn't mean u much marry y'all guy. No kill your self ontop tall guy. Marry who like u

amnesty7:
Do what will please you.

Believe u in me. That's not pleasing there. Is better u marry n divorce than not to marry at all. Just like not going to school at all. U will never fill satisfied

Carcholce:
Why not start from a mental home first. Take care of the problem.

A lot of Nigerian women have mental problem but they call it “mood swings”

You are very right!! I just spoke to my pastor about this issue

Klass99:


Ehn ehn, tell me something! Are you one of these men? How do you know they are a lot? I only know a few, about 5 to be precise. Including you, that would be 6.

That you don't know, doesn't mean there isn't. I also don't see the need of kids. At best, I adopt orphans(twins to be precise) at old age.

I have a couple of friends on this also. Nigeria is not as myopic as it use to be.

Poswahala:
Guys I genuinely need some advice
Because of the state of my mental health I have decided never to get married or have kids.

I suffer from intense depression and anxiety and other mental health problems. I'm unsure of my own future talk more of a child.

I do love being in relationships but I do that only for companionship and sex.

I don't know if I will regret my decision. The guys I have dated have been cool with my no marriage proposal but I don't think any Nigerian man will not want kids.

I'm thinking of moving to another country, buy a house, take care of my community and neighbors then when I'm old, I will move to a retirement home.

If I change my mind I can adopt a child, am not against adoption as I am with marriage, it depends on if my mental health improves.

The problem I have is that will I be lonely without a child, like I said I'm not into marriage despite being a woman trained in traditional home, it's not that I hate it or anything, it's not just for me. I will be unhappy being married.

But the child thing is bothering me, I always wanted a child, but i don't want my mental health to prevent me from loving and caring for the child.

Please advise.

My dear there is nothing wrong with you. It's just normal. When a 9ja babe starts doing well financially, there is a spirit of " I don't need a husband" that enters her. So it's an endemic issue n not your issue. My gal did same thing. Now she's single.

Poswahala:
Guys I genuinely need some advice
Because of the state of my mental health I have decided never to get married or have kids.

I suffer from intense depression and anxiety and other mental health problems. I'm unsure of my own future talk more of a child.

I do love being in relationships but I do that only for companionship and sex.

I don't know if I will regret my decision. The guys I have dated have been cool with my no marriage proposal but I don't think any Nigerian man will not want kids.

I'm thinking of moving to another country, buy a house, take care of my community and neighbors then when I'm old, I will move to a retirement home.

If I change my mind I can adopt a child, am not against adoption as I am with marriage, it depends on if my mental health improves.

The problem I have is that will I be lonely without a child, like I said I'm not into marriage despite being a woman trained in traditional home, it's not that I hate it or anything, it's not just for me. I will be unhappy being married.

But the child thing is bothering me, I always wanted a child, but i don't want my mental health to prevent me from loving and caring for the child.

Please advise.

My dear there is nothing wrong with you. It's just normal. When a 9ja babe starts doing well financially, there is a spirit of " I don't need a husband" that enters her. So it's an endemic issue n not your issue. My gal did same thing. Now she's single.
That's y linda ikejie will not want to marry self. If a white lady has money, that's when she will be Happy to have a husband. Nigeria is opposite of U.K in everything

judedwriter:


Anyways... Life remains the best teacher.

Life will teach you that polygamy is the best. Now go get ur self 12 sidechicks and enjoy urself. Such their nipples. Yummy

Hmm.
If you don't choose to get married, that is normal because a lot of women end up not being lucky to find as soul mate. Most marriages even don't workout.
The issue of having a child might be more important.
I chatted with an my ex months back. She was just thanking God for her life that she married early, though divorced. That all her friends female classmates in university were all accomplished consultants etc at the peak of their medical profession in the US, UK, etc, but the only regret thay all have is that while chasing carriers, they did not have time to have kids or did not deem it important. Now it is too late! They have money and all that comes with it, but have no kids. Some call her at night have a shoulder to cry on. Loneliness tins
If you can, have 1 or 2 kids.

vickydevoka:

My dear there is nothing wrong with you. It's just normal. When a 9ja babe starts doing well financially, there is a spirit of " I don't need a husband" that enters her. So it's an endemic issue n not your issue. My gal did same thing. Now she's single.
That's y linda ikejie will not want to marry self. If a white lady has money, that's when she will be Happy to have a husband. Nigeria is opposite of U.K in everything

What your girl did to you is all mammalian.....

Just know that you're going on a road of becoming unhappy for the rest of your life. There's beauty in having a family.

that is your headache

Poswahala:

I'm thinking of moving to another country, buy a house, take care of my community and neighbors then when I'm old, I will move to a retirement home.


Please advise.

You think say na as them dey show retirement home for movie e dey/
It will shock you sha

Klass99:


Okay, the last sentence made me smile. It's good to know there are more of us on this table.

If you don't see the need for kids, why consider adoption at old age again?

As a quoted, it can only be orphans. Just to put a smile on their face before I kick the bucket. It's the most priceless gift in life.

Poswahala:
Guys I genuinely need some advice
Because of the state of my mental health I have decided never to get married or have kids.

I suffer from intense depression and anxiety and other mental health problems. I'm unsure of my own future talk more of a child.

I do love being in relationships but I do that only for companionship and sex.

I don't know if I will regret my decision. The guys I have dated have been cool with my no marriage proposal but I don't think any Nigerian man will not want kids.

I'm thinking of moving to another country, buy a house, take care of my community and neighbors then when I'm old, I will move to a retirement home.

If I change my mind I can adopt a child, am not against adoption as I am with marriage, it depends on if my mental health improves.

The problem I have is that will I be lonely without a child, like I said I'm not into marriage despite being a woman trained in traditional home, it's not that I hate it or anything, it's not just for me. I will be unhappy being married.

But the child thing is bothering me, I always wanted a child, but i don't want my mental health to prevent me from loving and caring for the child.

Please advise.

whatever!

Same way lot of Nigerian men have mental problem , the call it ego, it is men world ,a man can rape, a man can get angry a man can ,beat his wife if she is stubborn, serious mental illness that needs attaention.










uote author=Carcholce post=112893806]Why not start from a mental home first. Take care of the problem.

A lot of Nigerian women have mental problem but they call it “mood swings”[/quote]

amnesty7:
Do what will please you.

Simple

LastProphet:
Nigeria is the wrong place to seek such advice as most people here are illiterates or fairly educated ones. There is nothing absolutely wrong with you, you are most likely a highly goal-driven person who would have achieved a lot if you were in a better clime but sown here you are going to be called all manner of things from ritualist, mammywater, spiritual husband, blah blah blah. Nigeria is a country of illiterates and dont let certificates fool you.
Condolezza Rice is still unmarried even after been a secretary of State in the US, you can find out how fulfilled she is. The current US VP same story, have you ever heard Angela Merkel talking about her husband? Only Africa especially Nigeria that you hear such nonsense.
Your migration plan is okay and you can adopt a child, ou may even feel like having a kid later and be single parent. All you need is look for something you have passion for and put in all your best, Get tp the very top of whatever you do and you will be fulfilled. Most black people only hope to be remembered by the product of their private part and not their brain.
I actually looked for a lady of this same requirement years ago but never found, all you meet are the ones convinced by pentecostal pastors that their lives are useless until they are married to a man even if he's half a man. You can see why africa will be hopeless for another 3-5000 years?

You just reek of self hatred. Pathetic.

If you are in a country like Nigeria, you'll be wooed and shamed to eventually marry, because marriage in this part of our world is a great achievement/accomplishment to a lot of people. Our society frowns at singleness. It is not a favourable environment for singlehood. I'm sure you're saying these because you're still young and haven't started getting pressures from family, friends, enemies and society. But if you intend moving to a saner society, then singlehood can be a possibility, as marriage over there is solely by choice. As for whether it is possible, it all depends on your motive and reason for not wanting to marry. If it's because you have the worng mindset about marriage, then it's laughable, but if it's a choice you've made because of health, religion or for whatever reason, then it's ok but just know that if you continue living in Nigeria, you'll be subjected to a lot of mockery and tongue-lashing.

Arsenate:

You just reek of self hatred. Pathetic.

Dull people always assume it's always difficult to overrate yourself, if yaya bello can think he can be president then you are not a surprise. Believe-in-yourself set of clowns. Go read about self-introspection mofo

LastProphet:


Dull people always assume it's always difficult to overrate yourself, if yaya bello can think he can be president then you are not a surprise

Blablabla, anyone who doesn't see life from my point of view is dull or an illiterate. You are a sad lost case and still have a lot of growing up to do.

Gentlerespect76:


This decision is self destructive.

How?
Just explain small.

Arsenate:

Blablabla, anyone who doesn't see life from my point of view is dull or an illiterate. You are a sad lost case and still have a lot of growing up to do.

A lost cause with 2 houses and a 3rd soon in a developed country, you will personally get the pictures just remain alive if your foooolishness permits

Klass99:


Ehn ehn, tell me something! Are you one of these men? How do you know they are a lot? I only know a few, about 5 to be precise. Including you, that would be 6.

Such Men exist.
I am also an anti-natalist.

I won't explain why, just watch the video.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9WoOQGOQ_w

Poswahala:
Guys I genuinely need some advice
Because of the state of my mental health I have decided never to get married or have kids.

I suffer from intense depression and anxiety and other mental health problems. I'm unsure of my own future talk more of a child.

I do love being in relationships but I do that only for companionship and sex.

I don't know if I will regret my decision. The guys I have dated have been cool with my no marriage proposal but I don't think any Nigerian man will not want kids.

I'm thinking of moving to another country, buy a house, take care of my community and neighbors then when I'm old, I will move to a retirement home.

If I change my mind I can adopt a child, am not against adoption as I am with marriage, it depends on if my mental health improves.

The problem I have is that will I be lonely without a child, like I said I'm not into marriage despite being a woman trained in traditional home, it's not that I hate it or anything, it's not just for me. I will be unhappy being married.

But the child thing is bothering me, I always wanted a child, but i don't want my mental health to prevent me from loving and caring for the child.

Please advise.

Your personal decisions is good for you and you alone...

Don't do anything to impress anybody
If you don't want kids... keep to it and focus on ur wellbeing...

As the year goes on...I pray you feel better... you can give a try with having a baby
If you too old for that...you can adopt..

Ypu priority is to stay happy and healthy

Same way lot of Nigerian men have mental problem , the call it ego, it is men world ,a man can rape, a man can get angry a man can ,beat his wife if she is stubborn, serious mental illness that needs attention.










uote author=Carcholce post=112893806]Why not start from a mental home first. Take care of the problem.

A lot of Nigerian women have mental problem but they call it “mood swings”[/quote]