₦airaland Forum

May God be with you and your 3 children...

Johnnyjohnnyman:
She is her bio mother the child looks exactly like her colleague she cheated on me with but she has denied that they were still together by the time she conceived. According to her the test result is wrong she claimed that they had breaks up in July 2020 we got back together in September 2020 she conceived that same month which is right according to the child birth date. I believed she was few days pregnant when we got back together or she had slept with both of us at the same during conception. If I am not the father the other man is surely the father .

Time of break up is irrelevant.if that DNA says he is not the father and says she is the mother.then it is what it is

wirinet:
Is the suspected father still her colleague at work? Has he been informed of the situation? What's the current relationship between wife and co-worker like now? Have you ever snooped on the text or WhatsApp messages? You need to if you have not.

She had quit the job due to childbirth complications . She didn't informed him ( her words not mine) because they had break up before she conceived there is no way he could be the father. Ever since we got back together I haven't suspected her and I don't have any reason I am free with her phone and she is also free with mine and our relationship has been stronger than before unfortunately this dna things has messed up everything and our family will not be the same way again

Williams150:
May God be with you and your 3 children...

Amen thank you

Williams150:
May God be with you and your 3 children...

You sure say the three is his own

baralatie:
Will it change the outcome of what has happened on ground?

Yes it will. First the guy and his family must be made aware so they know how to handle the situation. If he his married, the wife must be made aware.

Then the guy needs to know the extent the wife has been gaslighting him. How long has she been fùcking the colleague and if they were others. I wonder what she would have told the other guy concerning the husband. The excuse for the separation was as flimsy as it's stupid.

baralatie:
You sure say the three is his own

Yes they are mine

mariahAngel:
It is the married person who owes their spouse faithfulness, and therefore should be blamed for cheating.

Perfectly said. Whether man or woman, you owe your spouse faithfulness as long as you are legally married to him or her. The woman is clearly at fault here.

But unmarried people should try and fear God small

Sweetplum:
People change. It's a mistake the woman ll regret for life. I know she pinned the pregnancy on the man which is bad.
But what v we not done to God that God didn't forgive us?
Everyone deserves a 2nd chance!
If she apologize and promised to be a good wife, she deserved a second chance. But the issue of the illegitimate child need to be resolved amicably. Either she's returned or they claim her for life.

.
We're human being that's Good for u ..
Humanbeign can forgive but not forget..
Just imagine u being at work and be thinking if ur wife is still cheating on you with another man when you are away.Nah HBP Go kill person

Johnnyjohnnyman:
She had quit the job due to childbirth complications . She didn't informed him ( her words not mine) because they had break up before she conceived there is no way he could be the father. Ever since we got back together I haven't suspected her and I don't have any reason I am free with her phone and she is also free with mine and our relationship has been stronger than before unfortunately this dna things has messed up everything and our family will not be the same way again

Had you been free with each others phones before or after the reconciliation? Before the separation if she was free with each others phones, how come she was not aware you got N300,000 or you sent N200,000 to your sister for business purpose? Why was she annoyed you sent N200,000 to your sister for business?
How did you learn of the cheating? Why did she cheat? How come you never suspected anything before?

Finally, what's the state of the relationship currently? When was the last time they spoke or texted?

MoneyMustBMade:
I don't know how so men feel to be fucking peoples wife and be ok with it, since you know that if she is pregnant tomorrow now you not still accept her
How will the person feel if is the other way round?

I taya

Johnnyjohnnyman:
Yes they are mine

Okay then Thank God for That

So what we have a complication that arose due to a miscalculation!

So how you go about it matters!

But the problem is mistrust and suspicion is now rife

HRMK:
NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY:A FOOL ALWAYS REMAIN A FOOL!HE BLVS HE HAS THE MONOPOLY OF WISDOM!HE IS BETTER IGNORED!GOOD DAY!!

You're the f00l here sir!

wirinet:
Had you been free with each others phones before or after the reconciliation? Before the separation if she was free with each others phones, how come she was not aware you got N300,000 or upu sent N200,000 to your sister for business purpose? Why was she annoyed you sent N200,000 to your sister for business?
How did you learn of the cheating? Why did she cheat? How come you never suspected anything before?

Finally, what's the state of the relationship currently? When was the last time they spoke or texted?

Even if the last texted 20 years ago
It does not matter
There is a child on ground connecting them(ifdna proves him to be)
The only problem is if DNA proves another person as the father of the child
There is where the problem is now volcanic

baralatie:
Even if the last texted 20 years ago
It does not matter
There is a child on ground connecting them(ifdna proves him to be)
The only problem is if DNA proves another person as the father of the child
There is where the problem is now volcanic

To me it matter. I would want to find out why she cheated in the first place for there to be any hope of reconciliation. Marriage should be built on trust and love. If any is missing the marriage will not worth it.

I'm never getting married.

Do you want to spy on your partners WhatsApp?? DM me.
Number in s8ggy

Johnnyjohnnyman:
Good day all. I have posted exactly 2 months ago concerning my fourth child I went ahead with the DNA test unfortunately I am not her father.

Right now a lot of things have been going through my head i am shattered and depressed.

I don't know yet what is going to happen in my marriage I just don't know if the marriage will work or not.

I just wanted to keep you updated about the DNA.

Previous thread:

you self who as you to do DNA test

Maynman:
So how are men taking advantage of her body?
She was walking on street and they raped her, or she was the one that choose those randy men?
Have you heard of “my body, my choice”?

She open to him legally to chop sir

Small issues and women don spread leg. What rubbish

cliqtips:
Going by your first statement, does that mean women can keep bringing bastards to their husbands since tradition says any child born while a woman is still married to the man is his ?

And you think the side dude will keep her as wife?

Know this and know peace *If you forgive a lady/woman for what she suppose not to be forgiven for such as cheating, she would do it again and later blame you"

You are confusing your emotions with western values.
In Igboland, there is nothing like a bastard. Human life is well valued. Even if you puck a child from the street and call him son. The society regards him as your son irresedctive. In our African value susytem, a father is not just a man that sired a child, but a man that raised a child. From the the cgilds perspective, a father is the man you are trancending in his stead. Stop confusing it with crappy religious morality and impractical emotions

Well!
Op I sympthasize with you .
It is a problem married couples do not want to ever find themselves in
This problem is as a result of a miscalculation that arose from another miscalculation

So we need solution to save
1:your own blood pressure and heart(mental, physical, financial health),
2:a child(not yours),
3:3 kids (that was birthed by the woman for you),
4: a woman (who is living with you but has two baby daddy's)..

God will give you strength and wisdom

Bombeverybody:
Na this surprise you? My mother duped me of 500k I gave her to get me a plot of land. I gave her because I believe she was more experience than myself in land dealings and because she quite popular....na voicemail the money enter till tomorrow. I gave her in January 2017. Our relationship have never been same afterwards. She just dey answer my mother ni while I be answer her son for mouth.

Do you give her money for upkeep regularly before that day you give her 500k to buy land for you?

the truth is our parent struggle to train us to some extent before we come of age whereby we take care of ourselves. you suppose add like 100k to that 500k for her own needs as well maybe she won't have reason to touch your own 500k meant for land

all is well, hope you later got the land and forgive her by still sending her money because she is still your mother

StainlessCup:
That's not how Igbo culture works. Igbo culture doesn't tolerate adultery from the women. The first paragraph is true when a daughter gets pregnant for a man who is yet to perform the traditional rites or gets pregnant out of wedlock, then the child belongs to the father.

That is exactly how Igbo culture works. If you do not pay bride price as a sign of marriage. The child is not yours even if heaven falls. Go ask your elders. Thats why you should be careful getting women pregnant. Cause traditionally, your only way out is to find a way to marry the woman.

This must be a woman talk! Women oooo! Why?

Pells:
If you the rest of your kids are yours then your 4th child was exchanged at the hospital by the nurses
Your wife is innocent
Don't be a stupid

Helpout12345:
With current technology and the boyfriend has documented evidences ? And in this OP case, the wife affair was not a secret affair. Even her children knows the boyfriend, neighbors know and even their other colleagues might know as well. Plenty witnesses also.

And DNA is a new technology to Nigeria, it has not been court tested yet. That's why we don't have precedence in court yet.

Yes, witnesses, but you have not factored going to jail before you finish calling your witness to even qualify for dna test. The same evidence you submitted will be used to counter sue you for Adultery in a lower court for faster judgment. Then you head to jail. Whether you survive two years in jail to continue is another issue. That woman you are tormenting could very well pay someone for your life in jail and to be free of you.

Hassanmaye:
She open to him legally to chop sir

It was never by chance then, she didn’t slip on a banana and landed on a d.ick lol

wirinet:
To me it matter. I would want to find out why she cheated in the first place for there to be any hope of reconciliation . Marriage should be built on trust and love. If any is missing the marriage will not worth it.

They have already reconciled before this issue of DNA arose!

Now concerning why she cheated let me try to explain why a miscalculation reared its Head
In this case an excuse to cheat was created .it was created when the separated , unfortunately there was nobody to modulated the then wife to first seek reconciliation first with her husband by observing a reasonable time pause before she gets into another relationship .
But she miscalculated got into a relationship thinking of like she is now single but it did not come the way it sounds.
Now another miscalculation has erupted with its own st of problems
We now have a woman with two baby daddyzs

wirinet:
Had you been free with each others phones before or after the reconciliation? Before the separation if she was free with each others phones, how come she was not aware you got N300,000 or upu sent N200,000 to your sister for business purpose? Why was she annoyed you sent N200,000 to your sister for business?
How did you learn of the cheating? Why did she cheat? How come you never suspected anything before?

Finally, what's the state of the relationship currently? When was the last time they spoke or texted?

We have been free with each other phone after the reconciliation it has nothing to do with hiding things from each other because I have never cheated on her for the 10 years we have been she marriec it just that we both believed that when there's trust and there's no need to be checking each other phones.
She was annoyed because my sister duped me and I was broke she had to carry all the responsibility all alone.
I learned about the cheating from neighbours and my cousin brother who lives few doors away from our old house and she had admit to have cheated because the responsible was too much for her and the guy were taking care of her and the kids when I was broke. I asked her how long they have been dating she said it started in 2019 few weeks after i got duped and i asked her if she was sure she said yes they were not together before I got duped.
According to her the last time they spoke was July 2020 after the break up and I asked her what caused the break up. She said the guy was taking advantage of her he didn't fulfil all the promises he had made to her and she had to quit and cut her coats according to her size. She moved to a smaller house and change the children school after she came begging me to return back home. I asked her if she was using protection with the guy she said yes but on few occasions the condoms has broken up and I have told her I didn't cheat on her but before we reconcile we should both go and do all the stds test, I didnt have to because i was clean but i have done because we wanted to start wverything afresh which we did the test it came back clear and we got back together. I hope I have answered all your questions.

Get married first

zrocky:
yes I'm not

All this talk of men take care of yourself no the reach your side, in this hard time that a man has to hustle like tomorrow no dey, then he will still live with a woman he can not trust and be suffering heartaches. Have you not heard of peace of mind. Even marriage is not compulsory. Make una dey deceive yourself

NezzyMike:
You don't know if he's writing out of experience, there are broken men that suffered in life cus of their parents' mistake.

The problem here, is d man would always remember how his wife fuvcked another man whenever he sees sat kid, he would always be angry with d kid & lash out easily...I have seen dis kind of thing B4, d best thing is to let d woman & d kid go to her cheating mate... Remember she was drilled by another man & still trying to pass it off to d husband even after a DNA test

I am seriously cracking my brains out on what sustainable solution is!
I just keep have issues with a gliche

God go help op

Elsueno:
The problem here, is d man would always remember how his wife fuvcked another man whenever he sees sat kid, he would always be angry with d kid & lash out easily...I have seen dis kind of thing B4, d best thing is to let d woman & d kid go to her cheating mate... Remember she was drilled by another man & still trying to pass it off to d husband even after a DNA test

Who holy pass? You think to be a single father or have a broken home is easy? Op shouldn't have gone for the DNA test, he's suffering it now.