₦airaland Forum

Inishalom:
Mr Op, if this actually happened, I must say you lack Wisdom. I understand you want to take 'charge' of your new home, but taking it out on your MIL disrespectfully, is totally way off The district of Proper reasoning.

As long as she never disrespects your authority as a man, maybe she influences her daughter to do ungodly practices such as infidelity or maybe guide her into acts of fetish practices, your action when put up for survey would never get the applause of any sane and Noble audience.

This unreasonable act of yours comes with serious consequences which may not show forth now, but probably in the future.

My advice is you have to;
First and foremost, beg your wife and thereafter take her with you to meet your MIL and ask for her forgiveness, (not empty-handed o, with expensive gifts that costs you a lot of money). Kneel and possibly lie flat on the ground.
(Note: You need to be genuine about this)

Finally, Ask for her blessings on your marriage.
Also, drop that mentality of barring her from entering your home. Remember she's not just your wife's relative, she's her mother. Any other relative such as uncles, aunts, cousins etc could have such restrictions.

I pray you come to Wisdom and act appropriately.

God bless your new home

You just typed nonsense Sir. The OP should not apologise for taking charge of his home.

thesilentman:
Because we live in proximity-same town, she wouldn't quit checking up on her daughter virtually every day or at least every other day.

I felt a deep intrusion on my privacy so yesterday I summoned the gut and asked her if she didn't have a house. Before she could reply, I told her, 'learn to stay where you belong! I did not marry daughter and mother!`
She has since disappeared into thin air.

This evening am thinking whether i bleeped up or not.

I think you're a little bit harsh, you would talk to her in a polite manner, or betterstill use her daughter to talk to her.

G00DHardDick:
All these emotional pussy ass niggars on nairaland sef. Dude what is harsh and rude? Oga the op was blunt and direct to his demands and that's how it should be as a man. Men are getting weaker and emotionally this days, I understand they're called simps but dude stop saying harsh and rude because the op did well.

You’re a kid, if i wana show my masculinity i wont need to show it to a poor woman, only my influence a enough!

ZIMDRILL:
ok lets say he wasnt trained well
to address issues, but what do we say about the mother in law? wasnt she also trained well too, everyday visit i wouldnt like them too

The way i see, the fact she is now a mother in law, age and mature wise she should know better. The only reason i would accept for mother in law doing regular visits is when the son in law is loaded and she is coming to enjoy the life style

You have been saying nonsense throughout.
Even in real life I’m sure you wouldn’t talk to your own mother-in-law that way.
That’s even if the story is true.

Olril18:
You have been saying nonsense throughout.
Even in real life I’m sure you wouldn’t talk to your own mother-in-law that way.
That’s even if the story is true.

Answer me this question

Who is supposed to be more mature and well acknowledge of life ? son in law or mother in law

ZIMDRILL:
Answer me this question

Who is supposed to be more mature and well acknowledge of life ? son in law or mother in law

Does that justify the approach he took in addressing the matter?

Olril18:
Does that justify the approach he took in addressing the matter?

and the mother in law everyday visits ?

ZIMDRILL:
and the mother in law everyday visits ?

Don't mind them. What will the MIL say she is going to do there everyday if not amebo. The man married the lady and not her mother or sister.

eben97:
hello ma, what is bad will always be bad, despite your generation seem to be upturning evil for good. W all need be well cultured and mannered on in the public pls.For the fact you do not have direct contact with a person shouldn't make you mannerless and careless with words.Words are powerful you sure know that,and the way and manner you manage them depict who you truely are, whatever you have not counting .

The OP was wrong, the man was wrong and you were also wrong. You were all wrong.

ZIMDRILL:
and the mother in law everyday visits ?

You still do not get it. If your boss wrongs you at work, do you talk to him/her anyhow? It also doesn't mean that you can't show your displeasure either; that's where diplomacy comes in. Some people have put themselves into trouble physically and spiritually because of lack of tact.

As a Christian, the Bible says, "let your words be seasoned with salt" and I am sure that other religions will be of the same belief. Nabal (Abigail's husband) was smoten by God because he spoke stupidly to David. David wanted to destroy him by himself before but stopped. Unfortunately, nowadays, some will not stop at any length to destroy people, all because of the way those people addressed them - which could have been avoided with just being diplomatic (saying the very same thing in a much different and subtle manner).

IamAsiri:
You still do not get it. If your boss wrongs you at work, do you talk to him/her anyhow? It also doesn't mean that you can't show your displeasure either; that's where diplomacy comes in. Some people have put themselves into trouble physically and spiritually because of lack of tact.

As a Christian, the Bible says, "let your words be seasoned with salt" and I am sure that other religions will be of the same belief. Nabal (Abigail's husband) was smoten by God because he spoke stupidly to David. David wanted to destroy him by himself before but stopped. Unfortunately, nowadays, some will not stop at any length to destroy people, all because of the way those people addressed them - which could have been avoided with just being diplomatic (saying the very same thing in a much different and subtle manner).

if my boss wrong me personal level, i will respond on personal level, if its about work it would be different

lets not try to protect bad habit of in laws and suffer simply becoz you are daughteor or son i law period

on the bible that one keep to yourself or fellow christians, not everyone uses the bible as a general guidance like you i dont

i will ask you again who supposed to
be more mature to avoid such talk irregardless that the message has been passed on nicely or not ?


Even married people, sometimes hubby or wife s/he will go and see friends. Meaning even married couple they give each other space

Learn to be missed so that u will be always welcome and to be always there and people end up being tired with u

ZIMDRILL:
if my boss wrong me personal level, i will respond on personal level, if its about work it would be different

lets not try to protect bad habit of in laws and suffer simply becoz you are daughteor or son i law period

on the bible that one keep to yourself or fellow christians, not everyone uses the bible as a general guidance like you i dont

i will ask you again who supposed to
be more mature to avoid such talk irregardless that the message has been passed on nicely or not ?


Even married people, sometimes hubby or wife s/he will go and see friends. Meaning even married couple they give each other space

Learn to be missed so that u will be always welcome and to be always there and people end up being tired with u

Hence the reason why I wrote "other religions". I am a Christian, so that is the only thing I can quote. See, I have tried making you see light of what I am talking about. No more abeg! If you so wish to beat up your parents/in-laws in future because they are disobedient and disrespectful, then... .

IamAsiri:
Hence the reason why I wrote "other religions". I am a Christian, so that is the only thing I can quote. See, I have tried making you see light of what I am talking about. No more abeg! If you so wish to beat up your parents/in-laws in future because they are disobedient and disrespectful, then... .

am not a religous person

You how we differ, i dont resolve issues by beating people, i talk and irregardless of who you are, i rather say what i feel and dealt with, that dying inside with anger


one of the reason why black africans we suffer from things like BP its becoz of anger we not
allowed to talk simply becoz this person is an elder this and that

ZIMDRILL:
am not a religous person

You how we differ, i dont resolve issues by beating people, i talk and irregardless of who you are, i rather say what i feel and dealt with, that dying inside with anger


one of the reason why black africans we suffet from things like BP is anger not being allowed to talk simply becoz this person is an elder this and that

Okay

IamAsiri:
Hence the reason why I wrote "other religions". I am a Christian, so that is the only thing I can quote. See, I have tried making you see light of what I am talking about. No more abeg! If you so wish to beat up your parents/in-laws in future because they are disobedient and disrespectful, then... .

He is not talking about beating up his inlaws. He is talking about calling a spade a spade. What is bad is bad. There is no reason a MIL will choose to choke her daughters home. You can only try this with broke men.

thesilentman:
Because we live in proximity-same town, she wouldn't quit checking up on her daughter virtually every day or at least every other day.

I felt a deep intrusion on my privacy so yesterday I summoned the gut and asked her if she didn't have a house. Before she could reply, I told her, 'learn to stay where you belong! I did not marry daughter and mother!`
She has since disappeared into thin air.

This evening am thinking whether i bleeped up or not.

Oh! Sometimes I wonder who raised people like you

What a tackless mugu you are.
A man that lacks communication and diplomacy skill is a ruined man. Tueh for you and sorry for that woman whose mother you treated like garbage.

234GT:
He is not talking about beating up his inlaws. He is talking about calling a spade a spade. What is bad is bad. There is no reason a MIL will choose to choke her daughters home. You can only try this with broke men.

You are saying this because you didn't follow our conversations right from the very beginning. Anyway, I am tired of over-flogging this issue. You all have the right to insult your MILs the way you like because she has "disrespected" you. Peace out✌️.

thesilentman:
Because we live in proximity-same town, she wouldn't quit checking up on her daughter virtually every day or at least every other day.

I felt a deep intrusion on my privacy so yesterday I summoned the gut and asked her if she didn't have a house. Before she could reply, I told her, 'learn to stay where you belong! I did not marry daughter and mother!`
She has since disappeared into thin air.

This evening am thinking whether i bleeped up or not.

Guy, you dey mean o

But I like as you take do am.

Better you do am now and face the consequences than to suffer in silence forever!

Na your wife I still blame!

She no see person wey get sense marry.

It is even more painful that she still stayed back after the demeaning insult you melted on her mum!

Romanoff:
If you're not ready to put your wife first, don't marry. God that instituted marriage said a man will leave his parents to cleave to his wife. If you're not ready to leave, don't cleave to anyone's daughter. Stay with your mother and build with her, let her birth your kids and also manage your finances.

You people marry out of the need to satisfy your urges. You don't look for value or substance in a woman, you marry nonsense and then come online to cry foul and corrupt the minds of young men due to your own marital frustrations.

I dey sure say you get sisters, no worry, e go reach them.

Brainwashed MooMoo.

Who told you God was the one who instituted that shiit.

Evolutionlove:
Brainwashed MooMoo.

Who told you God was the one who instituted that shiit.

A product of a failed marriage has spoken.

Romanoff:
I useless romanoff, the most useless foool on earth and A product of a failed marriage of usvless parents has spoken.

Oh No Wonder.

Well I have always known you to be useless.

Evolutionlove:
Oh No Wonder.

Well I have always known you to be useless.

It pained you so much, you took out time out of your unemployed situation to edit my comment.

Eya. Pele. Forgive your parents for doing you wrong.

thesilentman:
Because we live in proximity-same town, she wouldn't quit checking up on her daughter virtually every day or at least every other day.

I felt a deep intrusion on my privacy so yesterday I summoned the gut and asked her if she didn't have a house. Before she could reply, I told her, 'learn to stay where you belong! I did not marry daughter and mother!`
She has since disappeared into thin air.

This evening am thinking whether i bleeped up or not.

You and your wife now have an equal stake in your house. You should've left the talking to for her to do on your behalf.

zeuss:
Obviously a sweet lady.... Not the quarrelsome type, or else u would not get away with that wicked talk.... She is lonely wants to be with her friend and daughter... .. Have a heart u broke hers.... U2 will grow old...... U fuked up......call her and apologize.

The best advice so far.

thesilentman:
Because we live in proximity-same town, she wouldn't quit checking up on her daughter virtually every day or at least every other day.

I felt a deep intrusion on my privacy so yesterday I summoned the gut and asked her if she didn't have a house. Before she could reply, I told her, 'learn to stay where you belong! I did not marry daughter and mother!`
She has since disappeared into thin air.

This evening am thinking whether i bleeped up or not.

Continue. But uf your wife acted that way to your mum, you will clap for her abi

234GT:
Then you should marry that your child and be with him forever. My baby is just 16 months old. I love him to pieces and I am always with him when I am not at work. However, I won't choke his marriage and I won't allow my wife do same. When the time comes, I have to leave him and his wife to live their life.

OP, nothing do you. Don't apologise to anyone. Your mother inlaw does not respect you in the first place. If she did, she won't choke you guys. You are doing well. She will dey her dey now.

.

thesilentman:
Because we live in proximity-same town, she wouldn't quit checking up on her daughter virtually every day or at least every other day.

I felt a deep intrusion on my privacy so yesterday I summoned the gut and asked her if she didn't have a house. Before she could reply, I told her, 'learn to stay where you belong! I did not marry daughter and mother!`
She has since disappeared into thin air.

This evening am thinking whether i bleeped up or not.

When you men have successfully separated your wife from her family - next stage na shege promax. Una tactics. If I were your wife, nothing in this world can separate me from my mother oo...as you value yours, i value mine.