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Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? - Family (5) - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumNairaland GeneralFamilyWhy Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? (30816 Views)

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Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by Greenfusion: 6:04am On Nov 05, 2023
Bigchristo:
You see the double standard of some people? Let’s say if the man was to be running up and down stressing himself to provide for the family and still come home the woman will then claimb on top him and knack herself Abi? First as a man nor allow woman feed you because dem be parrot, she must have probably been getting angry that the man is not doing enough and that’s why she denied him sex, one thing I can tell is that in my lowest I pay attention to how people around me treats me when I finally have the money I know how to treat them back, I don’t pray for any woman to feed me but if situations of life struck some men doesn’t even have choice but to accept all the insult throw at them but you know the shocking thing? When they finally made it they can as well do away with such woman, that’s when you will hear some women saying as I help am reach after he make am he dump me, common your character and how you treat the man matters he never wanted to experience such that’s why he run away, i grow up seeing our neighbors wife feeding her family till date they are still together because after she struggles for some years taking care of the family the man finally got a huge contract that changes his life I do been the woman was misbehaving he wouldn’t be with her today make una try Dey understand that life is full of upside down
Nor mind them, many grown up infants with lack of understanding.....life is unpredictable.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by Greenfusion: 6:24am On Nov 05, 2023
This generation seem to have a serious problem, alot don't know the meaning of marriage, see comments !
this is why the west has gone alot into contractual marriages, divorce everywhere. It has become a place of benefit instead of solace, support, love, care and understanding. All these mentioned eludes when the subject no longer offers the expected benefit. If your man or woman is down in any area, instead of working together n supporting each other as a team to solving the issue you would be looking for another option, if that other option fails, what do you do next?....your guess is as good as mine. Its terrible.

Although the current reality is that as a man try not to depend on your woman, but if you find yourself in that situation, try not to loose your respect, be firm.
Sometimes i try not to believe that woman are designed like this, i just feel it's a personal decision.
As a man, hustle legitimately, don't commit crime or kill yourself because of any ungrateful and foolish woman, its not worth it, always guide yourself and plan/prepare for the worse. Same goes to the woman.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by MyAmericandream(f): 6:27am On Nov 05, 2023
Dainy1:
So, you're justifying it?
But a man work, provide and still give s e.x without complain. Why is a woman's own different?
There's a huge difference, she'll clean, wash, shopping, cook, take care of kids, pray and still hustle. And you still want her to satisfy you, she'll be so exhausted na

A working class man won't do all the aforementioned, after work he goes straight to the bathroom take a shower- dinner would have been served already, he eats and perform his night duty.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by Akalia(m): 6:39am On Nov 05, 2023
Oloki:
After she might have run up and down from morning to evening in search of daily bread, you want her to come lay flat for a lazy man who probably didn't have anything doing from morning till evening except dreaming about which style he will teach his woman tonight?

Sex is wire to a woman's head in such a way she can switch off at will. So you need love and attention to unlock it.
Stop defending women in this regard. What about we men that hustle fucking hard to provide for our family, do we then deprive our wives sex because we are the breadwinners?
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by maasoap(m): 6:50am On Nov 05, 2023
Oloki:
After she might have run up and down from morning to evening in search of daily bread, you want her to come lay flat for a lazy man who probably didn't have anything doing from morning till evening except dreaming about which style he will teach his woman tonight?

Sex is wire to a woman's head in such a way she can switch off at will. So you need love and attention to unlock it.
So, a man who's providing for his family doesn't run up and down from morning till night? Or, if we agree that he runs up and down too, he's free to deny his wife sex? And you made it looked like women don't demand for sex
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by maasoap(m): 6:51am On Nov 05, 2023
Akalia:
Stop defending women in this regard. What about we men that hustle fucking hard to provide for our family, do we then deprive our wives sex because we are the breadwinners?
His logic was flaw
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by alizma: 6:57am On Nov 05, 2023
Dainy1:
But why?
Once she starts providing everything for the family, the se.xua.l attention becomes zero.

What's your opinion about a woman working hard to feed the family and depriving her husband intimacy?

Especially in a situation where she sees her man as a lazy man who is not putting on more effort to take on his responsibilities.

Does it mean she don't feel Hot some times as well?
😂😂, Even the ones wey no dey provide still dey deprive their husbands at times
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by Edusouls(m): 6:59am On Nov 05, 2023
oglalasioux:
Women see sex as a commodity. They give it to the person that pays.
you don talk am finish
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by Faposky95: 6:59am On Nov 05, 2023
Except the man's SIMP....
You just give IT to her.....
....she brings in bread...she takes in banana
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by IamMobisola(f): 6:59am On Nov 05, 2023
Dainy1:
But why?
Once she starts providing everything for the family, the se.xua.l attention becomes zero.

What's your opinion about a woman working hard to feed the family and depriving her husband intimacy?

Especially in a situation where she sees her man as a lazy man who is not putting on more effort to take on his responsibilities.

Does it mean she don't feel Hot some times as well?
When God created MAN(Adam), the first thing he gave man to do was WORK. The God decided he needed an HELP MATE(WOMAN).

By nature, MEN are providers while women are help mates. If roles are switched, things would go wrong.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by Ashawoman82: 7:03am On Nov 05, 2023
MyAmericandream:
There's a huge difference, she'll clean, wash, shopping, cook, take care of kids, pray and still hustle. And you still want her to satisfy you, she'll be so exhausted na

A working class man won't do all the aforementioned, after work he goes straight to the bathroom take a shower- dinner would have been served already, he eats and perform his night duty.
can u compare hustling at work to domestic chores?
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by Ishilove: 7:05am On Nov 05, 2023
From their comments you shall know the unmarried ones and they are the ones who are usually the most opinionated about marital affairs.

Marry first
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by Teymanhenry(f): 7:11am On Nov 05, 2023
oglalasioux:
Women see sex as a commodity. They give it to the person that pays.
I thought only prostitutes do that. Why generalize it then 😆
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by bigiyaro(m): 7:11am On Nov 05, 2023
Depends on the type of woman. Being the 'bread winner' means she is doing whatever the man is supposed to do to win the bread and bring it home, this gets her exposed the brutal reality of the saying 'its a man's world'
Anyway, in the course of 'working' to feed the family, she will meet the 'real men' out there.
We all know you have to give something to get something. Men give money most of the time while women give what they have. So in the course pursuing contracts, trying to get customers, closing business deals, making good sales, getting double promotion, getting good raises (especially unmerited ones) she may start giving to get, especially when the getting is hugely rewarding to her. Thus giving the 'lazy' husband becomes a waste precious resources. Better conserve that asset, that is what is feeding the family.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by jaxxy(m):
Dainy1:
But why?
Once she starts providing everything for the family, the se.xua.l attention becomes zero.

What's your opinion about a woman working hard to feed the family and depriving her husband intimacy?

Especially in a situation where she sees her man as a lazy man who is not putting on more effort to take on his responsibilities.

Does it mean she don't feel Hot some times as well?
If a woman was attracted to u only because u used to provide for her then any day u can't provide for her she looses attraction and interest in u.

Now if she's the one providing for u then she's see u as worthless to her and not deserving of her. The love transaction is over since u can't provide which was the main reason she she entered the marriage.

also note that is 1st warning. if u fail to provide after a certain time she will look for sm1else she's attracted to who is above her financially unless her faith or something restricts her.

This is why it's important for men to teach or get girls who are comfortable spending their own money on them not making only the man spending in that way the woman will be used to spending or providing while still attracted to u.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 7:31am On Nov 05, 2023
nototribalist:
una go dey talk rubbish with mumuu confident.

but a man( maybe a brick layer or mechanic) that is working all day should also provide food and he is still expected to have sex whether he has strength left or not. you see how ridiculous it is to think like that
Is this bricklayer also the one doing house chores?
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 7:40am On Nov 05, 2023
Myer:
Passion is every thing for a human being.
The source of her passion is dead. For many (male and female), that's money.
A dead-beat husband can kill a woman's passion fast.

Most Nigerian women were raised to believe their husband will be the sole provider in the marriage. And some men actially promised and assured their wives this. And words mean a lot to a woman.
So when for whatever reason tables turn and the Man isn't providing and she finds herself having to provide, the lady feels cheated, frustrated and out of her comfort zone.

If this festers for long beyond the threshold she can handle, the passion dies.
She may begin to reconsider her loyalty and might seek sex elsewhere especially in this generation where the fear of God is just a religious statement to so many.
We really need to take this weight and load off men. Parents need to train their daughters to be prepared to work. The irony is how you spend so much to send your daughters to school only to inculcate the virus of not working or providing in marriage.

God will continue to expose and deliver Nigerians from some of our cultural and societal norms that are negative and teach us the better and appropriate way.
The claim that 'most Nigerian women are trained to believe their husbands would be sole providers in marriage' if assumed true is only half of the equation.

Most Nigerian women are also trained to believe that they are solely responsible for housework.

So if you want the weight of sole provision taken off men, I also hope you want the weight of sole domestic chores taken off women.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 7:41am On Nov 05, 2023
Myer:
Passion is every thing for a human being.
The source of her passion is dead. For many (male and female), that's money.
A dead-beat husband can kill a woman's passion fast.

Most Nigerian women were raised to believe their husband will be the sole provider in the marriage. And some men actially promised and assured their wives this. And words mean a lot to a woman.
So when for whatever reason tables turn and the Man isn't providing and she finds herself having to provide, the lady feels cheated, frustrated and out of her comfort zone.

If this festers for long beyond the threshold she can handle, the passion dies.
She may begin to reconsider her loyalty and might seek sex elsewhere especially in this generation where the fear of God is just a religious statement to so many.
We really need to take this weight and load off men. Parents need to train their daughters to be prepared to work. The irony is how you spend so much to send your daughters to school only to inculcate the virus of not working or providing in marriage.

God will continue to expose and deliver Nigerians from some of our cultural and societal norms that are negative and teach us the better and appropriate way.
The claim that 'most Nigerian women are trained to believe their husbands would be sole providers in marriage' if assumed true is only half of the equation.

Most Nigerian women are also trained to believe that they are solely responsible for housework.

So if you want the weight of sole provision taken off men, I also hope you want the weight of sole domestic chores taken off women.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by maasoap(m): 7:47am On Nov 05, 2023
meobizy:
A provider role is an unnatural position for a woman. Her body is telling her to find a higher value male. A man can balance the equation by taking care of the children and helping with physical needs around the house. You can’t exercise your male pride when your woman is the breadwinner. The situation frustrates many men. They end up sleeping around or being abusive to the woman .
You are not far from the truth because, traditionally, men in this part of the world are not used to it.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by gidjah(m): 7:49am On Nov 05, 2023
Oh oh dear!!your choice of words is amazing I must say.You are good with them , and quite a funny post you e got here ma'am.i give u 7/10 on this and trongly agree with same.i realised that the more diligent and mentally involved a man gets in to meeting needs (doing his job and family obligations)the less his craving for sex sef.erection go vanish
Ensa777:
Because it is unnatural for her to be the sole provider for her family. The man instead of having unnecessary erection should channel that energy into providing for his family.
The bad financial situation can make a woman develop resentment for the man. Its a huge mood killer.

The woman who has become the sole provider do not want to add another soul into the situation she found herself which could stretch their lean' resources the more.

What amazes me most is that in Nigeria particularly, the woman is expected to continue with all her wifely duties in addition to providing for the family while society makes excuses for him who at that time is supposed to help out in anyway to ease his wife and make her look forward to both of them 'destressing' later. They will tell you to be gentle with him that Any lil thing hurts the ego of the jobless man. So he'd stay at home all day pressing phone instead of at least cleaning the house or doing laundry or cooking dinner. No!
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by bukatyne(f): 7:50am On Nov 05, 2023
Tetraozonaitera:
Many Christian wives are demonic. They are not aware they are.
Many will not make heaven for pushing their husbands out into adultery.

These idiotts are the ones you will see raising fake holy hands in the church, dancing like as if the are the most virtue.

They believe their husbands can't go out to have sex because they are supposed to be holy even if they starve them with sex.

Bro. I never patronized ashawo in my whole entire life even as a bachelor until the woman I married started misbehaving. Normally we do it once in a week but that time she kukuma closed her pussy for devil knows what.
I come vex that day. It was even on a Sunday. I didn't go to church. I just go to a brothel to patronize ashawo.
It was strange. As I never do am before.

I got there and pointed to one of the women and she stood up. Na dat day I know say all those appearance of ashawo na fake.
She collect money. ₦700 at that time. When she removed her clothes wetin I see was disgusting. Stretch marks everywhere. I'm sure her Vijay too must have stretched mark. I no look am well.

She held my thing and it stood up like a soldier ready for war. She inserted condom and lay for me to enter.
For me sex without pre-intimacy no be sex. The boobs and everything. She no even bring boobs out. She ask me say "she be my mother?" Wen I suck or even play with breast.
In a nutshell I made move to insert my thing into her. Na so the thing that was standing went down like rubber. She asked, "wetin happen" I tell am say I no know o.
Na I'm she wan rub am to make it stand again.
Na so I stood up, remove the condom and started wearing my boxer.
She asked, "you no dey do again?"
I said yes as I continued putting on my clothes.
"I no dey do this kind tin. Na my wife cause am,"
She com say, "okay o,"

Na so I commot the place.
Go my office and go plead with God make E forgive me.

Anyways,
Going to your pastor on such issue is shameful. Me, I no fit do am o.
My advice is.
Call her and talk to her for the last time. If she continues the nonsense. Go find a clean girl as a friend.

The Bible says "If you cant hold your self, go marry,"
Now you no fit hold yourself you go marry the demonic wife they close yansh.

Na so these women dey kill themselves. The husband goes out to contact HIV and come and give them at home.
They think God will punish the man only. Not knowing they will be blamed too.
It is well.
While I think this deserves a topic on its own, it has no bearing on the thread.

I would advise you open a thread to discuss this.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by saysoo: 8:02am On Nov 05, 2023
Dainy1:
But why?
Once she starts providing everything for the family, the se.xua.l attention becomes zero.

What's your opinion about a woman working hard to feed the family and depriving her husband intimacy?

Especially in a situation where she sees her man as a lazy man who is not putting on more effort to take on his responsibilities.

Does it mean she don't feel Hot some times as well?
She gives it to the people given her the bread. Disgusting to say but men do it effortlessly without any iota of shame.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by Mcreloaded(m): 8:05am On Nov 05, 2023
Mothers will not want to have sex with their son.
Since the mother oh I meant wife is now playing the role of mother by providing for her son oh I meant husband, it gets difficult for the mother oh I meant wife to see the man as her husband as she is now playing the role of mother.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by phemmyfour: 8:09am On Nov 05, 2023
Dainy1:
But why?
Once she starts providing everything for the family, the se.xua.l attention becomes zero.

What's your opinion about a woman working hard to feed the family and depriving her husband intimacy?

Especially in a situation where she sees her man as a lazy man who is not putting on more effort to take on his responsibilities.

Does it mean she don't feel Hot some times as well?
"Working hard" means she's getting support outside to feed her household. Hence, her service provider deserves the cookies more than her husband.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by saysoo: 8:12am On Nov 05, 2023
MyAmericandream:
There's a huge difference, she'll clean, wash, shopping, cook, take care of kids, pray and still hustle. And you still want her to satisfy you, she'll be so exhausted na

A working class man won't do all the aforementioned, after work he goes straight to the bathroom take a shower- dinner would have been served already, he eats and perform his night duty.
But later you will hear that the always exhuasted woman is banging the boss,neighbour, gateman, etc. No woman who has given birth that dosen't fill honey, none.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by Ubanz: 8:13am On Nov 05, 2023
That she is the hustler is understandable.
what pisses me off are those good for nothing housewives that deny the hubby his conjugal rights but will be the first to cry "cheating".
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by aswani(m): 8:17am On Nov 05, 2023
Dainy1:
But why?
Once she starts providing everything for the family, the se.xua.l attention becomes zero.

What's your opinion about a woman working hard to feed the family and depriving her husband intimacy?

Especially in a situation where she sees her man as a lazy man who is not putting on more effort to take on his responsibilities.

Does it mean she don't feel Hot some times as well?
Once roles are reversed in such a manner, affection, tolerance and respect goes out of the window.

It's the same in a family where the younger ones are doing much better financially than the older ones, the role reversal will cause issues if the older ones don't adjust themselves.

All of this is regardless of how much the man has been the breadwinner before circumstances changed to bring about the role reversal.

Obviously there are exceptions to this rule albeit very few though.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by godofuck231: 8:20am On Nov 05, 2023
When a woman goes through the abuse and torture a man passes through monthly to make money her mind set becomes damaged and messed up, toxic thinking that ruins marriages
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by Phargbemmy(m): 8:22am On Nov 05, 2023
Kobojunkie:
Well, whoever it is, get him to answer those very common sense questions. undecided
I will pen something down on this. Most times it is not intentional, I am speaking based on reality, you have been carrying your family and all of a sudden issues of life steps in and you cannot cater for same family again. I have a personal experience.

So when you ask why a man cannot take care of his immediate family, have you asked yourself what and what has contributed to that. I am not speaking for the irresponsible ones.

Life can happen to you, I had stroke, couldn't do any major strenuous activities again, lost my job and nearly lost my life, tell me what am I suppose to do?, commit suicide because I am not employable and the system does not favour you by providing a loan in form of capital to start something anew and your family start seeing you as an issue, tell me what you think should happen?
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by Phargbemmy(m): 8:25am On Nov 05, 2023
aswani:
Once roles are reversed in such a manner, affection, tolerance and respect goes out of the window.

It's the same in a family where the younger ones are doing much better financially than the older ones, the role reversal will cause issues if the older ones don't adjust themselves.

[font=Lucida Sans Unicode]All of this is regardless of how much the man has been the breadwinner before circumstances changed to bring about the role reversal.[/font]

Obviously there are exceptions to this rule albeit very few though.
Apt
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by Phargbemmy(m): 8:28am On Nov 05, 2023
Greenfusion:
Nor mind them, many grown up infants with lack of understanding.....life is unpredictable.
Pray to God not to be in circumstances where the only hope you will have is her and God. In such an instance, will you starve to death because you don't want your woman to feed you.

Well experiences most have seen make them come back to unrealistic submissions.

Just Pray yo don't find yourself in situations that will warrant such.
Re: Why Do Most Breadwinner Wives Deprive Their Husbands Intimacy In Marriage? by reddingtonblack: 8:31am On Nov 05, 2023
Jewessgratitud3:
Truth is a woman's love for her man lies in how well he's able to provide for her. The moment that is lacking, the love drops. Forget what anyone says.

Most of the men I've fallen in love with, it's their ability to provide for me that made me love and respect them. This may not apply to every woman but majority are in this category.

When a man can no longer provide to the extent he's now being perceived as lazy because he too refused to get another job, really it can be very annoying and its that annoyance that will make him irritating to the woman. [b]Most men don't really have that physical quality [/b]going on for them except provisions and every luxury money can buy.
You think if Ned was a commoner, Regina Daniels would agree to marry him? Hmm .. the earlier you men realize this the better for you.

Go and hustle.
I am appreciate your openness @least you aint ashame of who you are, and i agree with most things you pointed out BuT you see @ the "physical quality" you touched you fumbled

Men have better "Physical quality" compared to women, infact it is saddening how men have to live with women tolerating her saggy tits, stretch marks and turgids skin as she age older.
Most women attractiveness ends inside that cloth and makeup, she takes it off naa things fall apart, on the contrary beyond breast and yansh women have no value, and when that breast sagg and the yansh fade we Men still manage our wives, even if we have to lie she is beautiful & hot undecided

I agree a man that is broke should go and hustle,
what about a woman whose beauty is fading and are breast are saggging should go nd do what ??
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