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How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question - Family (4) - Nairaland

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How Do I Confront My Husband About This Issue? / Should I Confront My Brother's Wife? / I Am Suspecting My Wife Is Cheating. Should I Confront Her? (2) (3) (4)

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Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by ednut1(m): 1:42pm On Nov 21, 2023
Nollywood movie- confused repentant husband

1 Like

Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by Hezzyluv: 1:42pm On Nov 21, 2023
UnproudLife:
So it happened that at this certain time, I was running a lucrative business that had so much cashflow., to the tune of about 2-4m monthly and I married my long-time girlfriend whom I disvirgined and had been dating for 7 years.

The moment we married and started the family journey, I tried making conversations about having a core family standard that would make harmony stand the test of time. Note that I am a man who is disciplined and goal-oriented. So first I approached my wife with a conversation on how to both make meaningful contributions in getting the family from point A to B at all times, to be more detailed, one of the conversations we had was about our finances because I also mentored her in the same business and she was raking in cash as well and was profitable.

I asked her that we make it a habit of both of us making contributions, having a certain joint account where we drop in cash from a certain amount we make sure we get paid monthly from our businesses. This was because while I was a reasonable spender who knows that if I go broke nobody got my back in the whole wide world. I'm the kinda person who when I spend, let's say for example, 200k just knows I'm worth times 30 of that but even with that I didn't have a concrete structure in business, I just spend money or do things as though my business was an extension of me, which the same was my wife's as well. And this was the reason I wanted us to make the conversation and also do things together. So I told her when we get paid monthly from our businesses we send a certain percentage of it to a joint account to run the family and if I was doing let's say 70k she should do like 30k because, with all honesty, I valued her business at if not half of mine or slightly above it was close at the time. And this was immediately we got married oh.

I was met with strong refusal, as she told me I married her and it was my duty to cater for everything, but as a patient person that I am in not making my judgement rashly I kept trying to convince her. I did till when it dawned on me that we was stern with her objection. And then this created in me a sense of deep selfishness from my wife and also note that I wasn't ever nosey about her income and even though I had a way to access her accounts to monitor Everything I wasn't interested and I was being the sole provider in the family while I watched my wife spend her money how she liked, making decisions that should involve me with her sister and calling some things to surprise me, and I don't mean it negatively.

It happened that i started a project in building a house 3years before we married which I'd credit to her sisters's advice and by the time we married we were already done with the roofing, remaining plastering and the rest. We were living at a very moderate house in town but had this project at a suburb in lagos which we all know that as a lagosian is still Lagos but only that the area would be less expensive. So at a time we were planning moving to a better apartment in town when her sister and her friend advised we pour money in completing our own place to move in. After much convincing I agreed and God blessed the most during this period in business so I had a dream house kind of finishing to the interior and we moved in.

During this time we were managing living at our business place because I was still accommodating her in my business space and we lived there and went home ones or twice in 2 weeks as it was easier with my driving. We then had a certain disagreement that made my wife without my agreement move her business and everything to that house and the area sighting her sister advicing it be done. I winked at it for peace to reign and because I wasn't a fool. Sorry without having to correct what I typed up there, this was the real account of what happened. When we had our first child she moved directly there and I went home weekends while running both businesses with me just directing her staffs and guiding them with discipline. We all know when you leave business for strangers it's OYO but all that doesn't mean I was also having access to her money, the money went to her while I managed the business.

This also was playing out while we dated and got married in how she never likes making any expenditure in even the cost of executing her jobs, and she would rather blackmail which I don't buy and because at those times I stick to mindset in business she'd rebel and take rash decision that would later backfire. So that was how she came one day and moved her everything to the area where we built saying her sister advised it.

I was a faithful man, a born again personality who ever since I gave my life to Christ about 5years to our marriage I stopped having fornication even with her or anyone and till that point in the marriage. So as she had moved, ye little things I knew in her business started diminishing while I was running the family financially. But this lady was always making me feel less than a man because she was so so not submissive even though I married her with the us being both core Christians and born again where she was even more fired up than me so we all knew submissiveness was the watchword but she wouldn't sub to it at this point and when I was home she'd make life miserable for me shouting in an area that the voice travels far, insult my life telling me that she regretted marrying me because I was a person who just wouldn't budge and I used to say I don't "think" as in the thinking that leads to depression and I guess this was why she wasn't having it. I always found ways to channel my thoughts to things positive that gets me going and even forgiving her on time while she sometimes take days to stop keeping malice.

This lady graduated to the aspect of telling me she stooped so low marrying me and I could go out and meet other ladies that she wouldn't even give a damn, and this went on for a long time. Without exaggeration, I myself was someone that in her words she feel for initially because of my looks although I was 5"7 and she like 5"6 in height which isn't that short for a man. I knew how young in thought and look I was when I start taking care of myself and dressing nice again and without a doubt an handsome man, so it got to a point I said to myself I've had enough. At this time I was already lusting at my spec in ladies out there in which I married her like but she refused to remain at. I brushed off and even while being in my early 30s I had several ladies saying I looked 23-26 in age and I started meeting ladies and having affairs with multiple through platforms and it was mind-blowing to me because they were telling me I looked better in person even though the profile pictures I had were compelling themselves. So I had several young ladies wishing we were dating for real but u didn't want that and wouldn't lie to get them laid with promises but the only lie I told was that I wasn't married neither with kids which some weren't even suspecting not to talk of asking such. But something was just not clicking with the way guys if this age behave when I relate with them and this is when we have more deeper relations and then they start sensing the nature of responsibility which makes them ask if I was married.

So at this point I said to myself, I was separated from my wife and I told her in several occasions because I wasn't going home as often as before she noticed all the changes in my looks but cared less. I was so far gone in having other ladies that I didn't even know what could ever make me wanna get back with her again. But in all these I was still a man who doesn't believe in divorce, which is what I always tell her made her misbehave. Then lemme note this. I was so far gone playing churchy Al these years I never knew the age had turned around and ladies were now so much for sale, I could remember hearing the word hookup for the first time 2 years ago when I had started contemplating cheating and I turned so many girls down on those platforms when I understood what hookup meant. I mostly kept them friends online for whining and all and I went off without meeting anyone until last year, that same last year by almost the middle of the year I had my first encounter with a lady who was almost begging I had s*X with her right in my car as the car was tinted at the back, and this was while being friends. I refused and explained I had never done it before. But a month later I started getting in the act until miraculously this year at mid year I had been longing for a change in lifestyle when I got the gift of repentance right in church and I just at this moment didn't care what my wife had ever done to me, I just forgave her in my heart, asked for forgiveness from God. Then it has been happening lately by then that she had been begging me and her sister was saying she in the person of my wife was already fed up and wanted to beg back in good terms with me but you know basking in the love of flesh I wasn't into it and knowing she was the kind that goes back to her vomit. But at this point I determined to make her come where I was and then we reconcile. But shortly after I did restitution with her and told her all I had done and what she made be go into but to my surprise she was so disappointed crying and telling me all sorts which was surprising to me because I expected this woman should have already seen the writing on the wall because I don't know how to pretend at all but she said she never suspected that she knew I was a Christian. Although I played a clean game but was was obvious was the fact that I changed in looks and all and shouldn't that be glaring. And now she only sober occasionally when the thoughts kicks in

My main problem now is that, while my first child is a copy of me, I started seeing the looks of my sister in law's last born in my last kid, which my mum has vaguely noted and I seconded. We can't even nurture the thought as we just said it. But personally each day I now stay with the kid I keep looking the semblance and thinking what if my bro in law which is my sister in law's hobby fathered this child. You see that would have out the child conception at about 3 months before I ever started having affairs outside marriage. I just wish to know what you guys think because I haven't even been able to ask any question relating to that as my wife just seem to off to ever fall into such.

Please ignore any typo as it was long and I'm trying to get by with a new course and it'll be hard to go through what I've written again. Pardon me


From all what I read here, u have tried your best as a man, kudos to u. The place I fink u got it wrong was restitution. Yes you heard me right. U don't go about doing such without seeking the face of God to know either to go ahead or not. Not all restitution should be do without the backing of holy God. I no fit go in detail here I dey busy.

Secondly, since u have the money, just secretly do DNA test to that guy. Goodluck!

1 Like

Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by djon78(m): 1:42pm On Nov 21, 2023
EEIA:

I am thinking of only having a baby mama..
Marriage now na like to go pay for problem come put am for house.



As for me, marriage no be by force oh!

You do anyhow, you leave. You cannot be the reason why I will not have peace.
After all we are supposed to avoid toxic people and places to be at peace with ourselves and the environment.

Why do these entitled gender of this generation feel that all power lies in their tears and in between their legs?



My candid advice to anybody wey never Marry

Better look very well before you leap

Character of the person you are marrying is very important

You must be in control
Be the driver
It must be according to your terms

Any woman wey no gree to this terms during courtship
Abeg run

Finally
Women no dey respect nice guys
Be very firm from day one
I don't mean being mean and wicked

I mean being firm
Let your woman know say you be no nonsense Man

Women don't give too much wahala to Men dey fear

That's what I have observed

8 Likes 4 Shares

Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by xavuv: 1:48pm On Nov 21, 2023
If you think it is then it probably is.

Pls and pls DNA TEST should be done ASAP

No time pls
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by peterbello(m): 1:48pm On Nov 21, 2023
UnproudLife:

My main problem now is that, while my first child is a copy of me, I started seeing the looks of my sister in law's last born in my last kid, which my mum has vaguely noted and I seconded. We can't even nurture the thought as we just said it. But personally each day I now stay with the kid I keep looking the semblance and thinking what if my bro in law which is my sister in law's hobby fathered this child. You see that would have out the child conception at about 3 months before I ever started having affairs outside marriage. I just wish to know what you guys think because I haven't even been able to ask any question relating to that as my wife just seem to off to ever fall into such.

Your sister in laws' child could look like your child because they are related through their mothers so I don't see any issue there. Unless you are saying your child is a carbon copy of your sister in laws husband and not their child.
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by qtx(m): 1:49pm On Nov 21, 2023
UnproudLife:
So it happened that at this certain time, I was running a lucrative business that had so much cashflow., to the tune of about 2-4m monthly and I married my long-time girlfriend whom I disvirgined and had been dating for 7 years.

The moment we married and started the family journey, I tried making conversations about having a core family standard that would make harmony stand the test of time. Note that I am a man who is disciplined and goal-oriented. So first I approached my wife with a conversation on how to both make meaningful contributions in getting the family from point A to B at all times, to be more detailed, one of the conversations we had was about our finances because I also mentored her in the same business and she was raking in cash as well and was profitable.

I asked her that we make it a habit of both of us making contributions, having a certain joint account where we drop in cash from a certain amount we make sure we get paid monthly from our businesses. This was because while I was a reasonable spender who knows that if I go broke nobody got my back in the whole wide world. I'm the kinda person who when I spend, let's say for example, 200k just knows I'm worth times 30 of that but even with that I didn't have a concrete structure in business, I just spend money or do things as though my business was an extension of me, which the same was my wife's as well. And this was the reason I wanted us to make the conversation and also do things together. So I told her when we get paid monthly from our businesses we send a certain percentage of it to a joint account to run the family and if I was doing let's say 70k she should do like 30k because, with all honesty, I valued her business at if not half of mine or slightly above it was close at the time. And this was immediately we got married oh.

I was met with strong refusal, as she told me I married her and it was my duty to cater for everything, but as a patient person that I am in not making my judgement rashly I kept trying to convince her. I did till when it dawned on me that we was stern with her objection. And then this created in me a sense of deep selfishness from my wife and also note that I wasn't ever nosey about her income and even though I had a way to access her accounts to monitor Everything I wasn't interested and I was being the sole provider in the family while I watched my wife spend her money how she liked, making decisions that should involve me with her sister and calling some things to surprise me, and I don't mean it negatively.

It happened that i started a project in building a house 3years before we married which I'd credit to her sisters's advice and by the time we married we were already done with the roofing, remaining plastering and the rest. We were living at a very moderate house in town but had this project at a suburb in lagos which we all know that as a lagosian is still Lagos but only that the area would be less expensive. So at a time we were planning moving to a better apartment in town when her sister and her friend advised we pour money in completing our own place to move in. After much convincing I agreed and God blessed the most during this period in business so I had a dream house kind of finishing to the interior and we moved in.

During this time we were managing living at our business place because I was still accommodating her in my business space and we lived there and went home ones or twice in 2 weeks as it was easier with my driving. We then had a certain disagreement that made my wife without my agreement move her business and everything to that house and the area sighting her sister advicing it be done. I winked at it for peace to reign and because I wasn't a fool. Sorry without having to correct what I typed up there, this was the real account of what happened. When we had our first child she moved directly there and I went home weekends while running both businesses with me just directing her staffs and guiding them with discipline. We all know when you leave business for strangers it's OYO but all that doesn't mean I was also having access to her money, the money went to her while I managed the business.

This also was playing out while we dated and got married in how she never likes making any expenditure in even the cost of executing her jobs, and she would rather blackmail which I don't buy and because at those times I stick to mindset in business she'd rebel and take rash decision that would later backfire. So that was how she came one day and moved her everything to the area where we built saying her sister advised it.

I was a faithful man, a born again personality who ever since I gave my life to Christ about 5years to our marriage I stopped having fornication even with her or anyone and till that point in the marriage. So as she had moved, ye little things I knew in her business started diminishing while I was running the family financially. But this lady was always making me feel less than a man because she was so so not submissive even though I married her with the us being both core Christians and born again where she was even more fired up than me so we all knew submissiveness was the watchword but she wouldn't sub to it at this point and when I was home she'd make life miserable for me shouting in an area that the voice travels far, insult my life telling me that she regretted marrying me because I was a person who just wouldn't budge and I used to say I don't "think" as in the thinking that leads to depression and I guess this was why she wasn't having it. I always found ways to channel my thoughts to things positive that gets me going and even forgiving her on time while she sometimes take days to stop keeping malice.

This lady graduated to the aspect of telling me she stooped so low marrying me and I could go out and meet other ladies that she wouldn't even give a damn, and this went on for a long time. Without exaggeration, I myself was someone that in her words she feel for initially because of my looks although I was 5"7 and she like 5"6 in height which isn't that short for a man. I knew how young in thought and look I was when I start taking care of myself and dressing nice again and without a doubt an handsome man, so it got to a point I said to myself I've had enough. At this time I was already lusting at my spec in ladies out there in which I married her like but she refused to remain at. I brushed off and even while being in my early 30s I had several ladies saying I looked 23-26 in age and I started meeting ladies and having affairs with multiple through platforms and it was mind-blowing to me because they were telling me I looked better in person even though the profile pictures I had were compelling themselves. So I had several young ladies wishing we were dating for real but u didn't want that and wouldn't lie to get them laid with promises but the only lie I told was that I wasn't married neither with kids which some weren't even suspecting not to talk of asking such. But something was just not clicking with the way guys if this age behave when I relate with them and this is when we have more deeper relations and then they start sensing the nature of responsibility which makes them ask if I was married.

So at this point I said to myself, I was separated from my wife and I told her in several occasions because I wasn't going home as often as before she noticed all the changes in my looks but cared less. I was so far gone in having other ladies that I didn't even know what could ever make me wanna get back with her again. But in all these I was still a man who doesn't believe in divorce, which is what I always tell her made her misbehave. Then lemme note this. I was so far gone playing churchy Al these years I never knew the age had turned around and ladies were now so much for sale, I could remember hearing the word hookup for the first time 2 years ago when I had started contemplating cheating and I turned so many girls down on those platforms when I understood what hookup meant. I mostly kept them friends online for whining and all and I went off without meeting anyone until last year, that same last year by almost the middle of the year I had my first encounter with a lady who was almost begging I had s*X with her right in my car as the car was tinted at the back, and this was while being friends. I refused and explained I had never done it before. But a month later I started getting in the act until miraculously this year at mid year I had been longing for a change in lifestyle when I got the gift of repentance right in church and I just at this moment didn't care what my wife had ever done to me, I just forgave her in my heart, asked for forgiveness from God. Then it has been happening lately by then that she had been begging me and her sister was saying she in the person of my wife was already fed up and wanted to beg back in good terms with me but you know basking in the love of flesh I wasn't into it and knowing she was the kind that goes back to her vomit. But at this point I determined to make her come where I was and then we reconcile. But shortly after I did restitution with her and told her all I had done and what she made be go into but to my surprise she was so disappointed crying and telling me all sorts which was surprising to me because I expected this woman should have already seen the writing on the wall because I don't know how to pretend at all but she said she never suspected that she knew I was a Christian. Although I played a clean game but was was obvious was the fact that I changed in looks and all and shouldn't that be glaring. And now she only sober occasionally when the thoughts kicks in

My main problem now is that, while my first child is a copy of me, I started seeing the looks of my sister in law's last born in my last kid, which my mum has vaguely noted and I seconded. We can't even nurture the thought as we just said it. But personally each day I now stay with the kid I keep looking the semblance and thinking what if my bro in law which is my sister in law's hobby fathered this child. You see that would have out the child conception at about 3 months before I ever started having affairs outside marriage. I just wish to know what you guys think because I haven't even been able to ask any question relating to that as my wife just seem to off to ever fall into such.

Please ignore any typo as it was long and I'm trying to get by with a new course and it'll be hard to go through what I've written again. Pardon me

D.N.A fullstop!
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by BananaPeel(m): 1:50pm On Nov 21, 2023
UnproudLife:
So it happened that at this certain time, I was running a lucrative business that had so much cashflow., to the tune of about 2-4m monthly and I married my long-time girlfriend whom I disvirgined and had been dating for 7 years.

The moment we married and started the family journey, I tried making conversations about having a core family standard that would make harmony stand the test of time. Note that I am a man who is disciplined and goal-oriented. So first I approached my wife with a conversation on how to both make meaningful contributions in getting the family from point A to B at all times, to be more detailed, one of the conversations we had was about our finances because I also mentored her in the same business and she was raking in cash as well and was profitable.

I asked her that we make it a habit of both of us making contributions, having a certain joint account where we drop in cash from a certain amount we make sure we get paid monthly from our businesses. This was because while I was a reasonable spender who knows that if I go broke nobody got my back in the whole wide world. I'm the kinda person who when I spend, let's say for example, 200k just knows I'm worth times 30 of that but even with that I didn't have a concrete structure in business, I just spend money or do things as though my business was an extension of me, which the same was my wife's as well. And this was the reason I wanted us to make the conversation and also do things together. So I told her when we get paid monthly from our businesses we send a certain percentage of it to a joint account to run the family and if I was doing let's say 70k she should do like 30k because, with all honesty, I valued her business at if not half of mine or slightly above it was close at the time. And this was immediately we got married oh.

I was met with strong refusal, as she told me I married her and it was my duty to cater for everything, but as a patient person that I am in not making my judgement rashly I kept trying to convince her. I did till when it dawned on me that we was stern with her objection. And then this created in me a sense of deep selfishness from my wife and also note that I wasn't ever nosey about her income and even though I had a way to access her accounts to monitor Everything I wasn't interested and I was being the sole provider in the family while I watched my wife spend her money how she liked, making decisions that should involve me with her sister and calling some things to surprise me, and I don't mean it negatively.

It happened that i started a project in building a house 3years before we married which I'd credit to her sisters's advice and by the time we married we were already done with the roofing, remaining plastering and the rest. We were living at a very moderate house in town but had this project at a suburb in lagos which we all know that as a lagosian is still Lagos but only that the area would be less expensive. So at a time we were planning moving to a better apartment in town when her sister and her friend advised we pour money in completing our own place to move in. After much convincing I agreed and God blessed the most during this period in business so I had a dream house kind of finishing to the interior and we moved in.

During this time we were managing living at our business place because I was still accommodating her in my business space and we lived there and went home ones or twice in 2 weeks as it was easier with my driving. We then had a certain disagreement that made my wife without my agreement move her business and everything to that house and the area sighting her sister advicing it be done. I winked at it for peace to reign and because I wasn't a fool. Sorry without having to correct what I typed up there, this was the real account of what happened. When we had our first child she moved directly there and I went home weekends while running both businesses with me just directing her staffs and guiding them with discipline. We all know when you leave business for strangers it's OYO but all that doesn't mean I was also having access to her money, the money went to her while I managed the business.

This also was playing out while we dated and got married in how she never likes making any expenditure in even the cost of executing her jobs, and she would rather blackmail which I don't buy and because at those times I stick to mindset in business she'd rebel and take rash decision that would later backfire. So that was how she came one day and moved her everything to the area where we built saying her sister advised it.

I was a faithful man, a born again personality who ever since I gave my life to Christ about 5years to our marriage I stopped having fornication even with her or anyone and till that point in the marriage. So as she had moved, ye little things I knew in her business started diminishing while I was running the family financially. But this lady was always making me feel less than a man because she was so so not submissive even though I married her with the us being both core Christians and born again where she was even more fired up than me so we all knew submissiveness was the watchword but she wouldn't sub to it at this point and when I was home she'd make life miserable for me shouting in an area that the voice travels far, insult my life telling me that she regretted marrying me because I was a person who just wouldn't budge and I used to say I don't "think" as in the thinking that leads to depression and I guess this was why she wasn't having it. I always found ways to channel my thoughts to things positive that gets me going and even forgiving her on time while she sometimes take days to stop keeping malice.

This lady graduated to the aspect of telling me she stooped so low marrying me and I could go out and meet other ladies that she wouldn't even give a damn, and this went on for a long time. Without exaggeration, I myself was someone that in her words she feel for initially because of my looks although I was 5"7 and she like 5"6 in height which isn't that short for a man. I knew how young in thought and look I was when I start taking care of myself and dressing nice again and without a doubt an handsome man, so it got to a point I said to myself I've had enough. At this time I was already lusting at my spec in ladies out there in which I married her like but she refused to remain at. I brushed off and even while being in my early 30s I had several ladies saying I looked 23-26 in age and I started meeting ladies and having affairs with multiple through platforms and it was mind-blowing to me because they were telling me I looked better in person even though the profile pictures I had were compelling themselves. So I had several young ladies wishing we were dating for real but u didn't want that and wouldn't lie to get them laid with promises but the only lie I told was that I wasn't married neither with kids which some weren't even suspecting not to talk of asking such. But something was just not clicking with the way guys if this age behave when I relate with them and this is when we have more deeper relations and then they start sensing the nature of responsibility which makes them ask if I was married.

So at this point I said to myself, I was separated from my wife and I told her in several occasions because I wasn't going home as often as before she noticed all the changes in my looks but cared less. I was so far gone in having other ladies that I didn't even know what could ever make me wanna get back with her again. But in all these I was still a man who doesn't believe in divorce, which is what I always tell her made her misbehave. Then lemme note this. I was so far gone playing churchy Al these years I never knew the age had turned around and ladies were now so much for sale, I could remember hearing the word hookup for the first time 2 years ago when I had started contemplating cheating and I turned so many girls down on those platforms when I understood what hookup meant. I mostly kept them friends online for whining and all and I went off without meeting anyone until last year, that same last year by almost the middle of the year I had my first encounter with a lady who was almost begging I had s*X with her right in my car as the car was tinted at the back, and this was while being friends. I refused and explained I had never done it before. But a month later I started getting in the act until miraculously this year at mid year I had been longing for a change in lifestyle when I got the gift of repentance right in church and I just at this moment didn't care what my wife had ever done to me, I just forgave her in my heart, asked for forgiveness from God. Then it has been happening lately by then that she had been begging me and her sister was saying she in the person of my wife was already fed up and wanted to beg back in good terms with me but you know basking in the love of flesh I wasn't into it and knowing she was the kind that goes back to her vomit. But at this point I determined to make her come where I was and then we reconcile. But shortly after I did restitution with her and told her all I had done and what she made be go into but to my surprise she was so disappointed crying and telling me all sorts which was surprising to me because I expected this woman should have already seen the writing on the wall because I don't know how to pretend at all but she said she never suspected that she knew I was a Christian. Although I played a clean game but was was obvious was the fact that I changed in looks and all and shouldn't that be glaring. And now she only sober occasionally when the thoughts kicks in

My main problem now is that, while my first child is a copy of me, I started seeing the looks of my sister in law's last born in my last kid, which my mum has vaguely noted and I seconded. We can't even nurture the thought as we just said it. But personally each day I now stay with the kid I keep looking the semblance and thinking what if my bro in law which is my sister in law's hobby fathered this child. You see that would have out the child conception at about 3 months before I ever started having affairs outside marriage. I just wish to know what you guys think because I haven't even been able to ask any question relating to that as my wife just seem to off to ever fall into such.

Please ignore any typo as it was long and I'm trying to get by with a new course and it'll be hard to go through what I've written again. Pardon me


I will only comment on the issue of the child. The way her sister was begging you to forgive her and all, shows something doesn't add up.
Secondly, there's nothing wrong if they both have the same semblance as long as he looks like your sister in-law than the husband. But keep a close watch
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by xavuv: 1:50pm On Nov 21, 2023
djon78:





Finally
Women no dey respect nice guys
Be very firm from day one
I don't mean being mean and wicked

I mean being firm
Let your woman know say you be no nonsense Man

Women don't give too much wahala to Men dey fear

That's what I have observed

Yes. Firmness Plus a little tint of wickedness does it
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by sheungeek(m): 1:51pm On Nov 21, 2023
It's important to approach such delicate matters with empathy and honesty.

Consider having an open and sincere conversation with your wife about your concerns and feelings.

Seek couples counseling to facilitate communication and understanding.

Paternity tests are an option, but it's crucial to handle the situation with sensitivity to minimize any emotional impact on the family.

Ultimately, fostering trust and communication is key to navigating such complex issues.
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by bizzibodi(m): 1:52pm On Nov 21, 2023
Person that claim to make #4m monthly na nairaland he come dey ask for advice.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by TheOldGods: 1:53pm On Nov 21, 2023
UnproudLife:

Please ignore any typo as it was long and I'm trying to get by with a new course and it'll be hard to go through what I've written again. Pardon me

Oga thiis your Post is too long, While should i sit for hours reading a single post, we all have lives and work to do. i didn't read half but i read comments and FEW.

First you people always think marrige is an achievement, you rush to marry, thinking youre achieving something, its trash, OGbeni, you already have kids, divorce that bitch and move on. take care of your kids, and find a small girl and be changing blood, anytime youre tired you move to the next.

3 Likes

Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by Ishilove: 1:54pm On Nov 21, 2023
Carcholce:
Wahala!!

I am not married but the points I noted from your post is that.

1. Don’t teach women how to fish, give them fish instead. When giving them the fish, make sure it’s only the head and the tail.

2. Most women will hate you if you are nice man. I don’t know where the hate comes from. It seems natural. You have to be cruel to them, always make them remember the wrong things you did instead of the good. They’ll love you more.

3. If your wife pushes you out with her nagging and disrespectful behavior, and you really go out and start cheating/fornicating, it’s a trap. When you fall into the trap, you’ll fall so hard that you’ll lose more than you can ever recover. This is the ultimate test most men fail

4. About your last born. Only God and DNA test knows the answer. Or you can simply approach your sister in law hubby and ask him if he mistakenly slept with your wife. Just be polite with the question.
So many mentally unhinged people running amok on this forum
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by Ishilove: 1:55pm On Nov 21, 2023
djon78:




My candid advice to anybody wey never Marry

Better look very well before you leap

Character of the person you are marrying is very important

You must be in control
Be the driver
It must be according to your terms

Any woman wey no gree to this terms during courtship
Abeg run

Finally
Women no dey respect nice guys
Be very firm from day one
I don't mean being mean and wicked

I mean being firm
Let your woman know say you be no nonsense Man

Women don't give too much wahala to Men dey fear

That's what I have observed
This fallacy has been repeated so much, many men are beginning to believe it.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by Allisgud: 1:56pm On Nov 21, 2023
Some women sha,I don't know how some of them dey reason, husband teach wife him line of business still finance the business, now the business is booming, now u the wife refuse to contribute
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by Allisgud: 1:56pm On Nov 21, 2023
Some women sha,I don't know how some of them dey reason, husband teach wife him line of business still finance the business, now the business is booming, now u the wife refuse to contribute undecided
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by valentineuwakwe(m): 1:57pm On Nov 21, 2023
Are u a weakling? Take the bull by the horn..you earn 2.4m monthly and ordinary 30k DNA test they hard you to carry out on your last child!
Did you not see all this wen you were dating? Fix things up
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by Dexy4yah(m): 1:58pm On Nov 21, 2023
"she said I wanted to use her head"


How will you be thinking that your husband is trying to use your head... business that he opened for you.


That Your wife no well o

1 Like

Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by Ijaya123: 2:04pm On Nov 21, 2023
UnproudLife:
So it happened that at this certain time, I was running a lucrative business that had so much cashflow., to the tune of about 2-4m monthly and I married my long-time girlfriend whom I disvirgined and had been dating for 7 years.


This lady graduated to the aspect of telling me she stooped so low marrying me and I could go out and meet other ladies that she wouldn't even give a damn, and this went on for a long time. Without exaggeration, I myself was someone that in her words she feel for initially because of my looks although I was 5"7 and she like 5"6 in height which isn't that short for a man. I knew how young in thought and look I was when I start taking care of myself and dressing nice again and without a doubt an handsome man, so it got to a point I said to myself I've had enough. At this time I was already lusting at my spec in ladies out there in which I married her like but she refused to remain at. I brushed off and even while being in my early 30s I had several ladies saying I looked 23-26 in age and I started meeting ladies and having affairs with multiple through platforms and it was mind-blowing to me because they were telling me I looked better in person even though the profile pictures I had were compelling themselves. So I had several young ladies wishing we were dating for real but u didn't want that and wouldn't lie to get them laid with promises but the only lie I told was that I wasn't married neither with kids which some weren't even suspecting not to talk of asking such. But something was just not clicking with the way guys if this age behave when I relate with them and this is when we have more deeper relations and then they start sensing the nature of responsibility which makes them ask if I was married.


Please ignore any typo as it was long and I'm trying to get by with a new course and it'll be hard to go through what I've written again. Pardon me


If you're in a relationship and your partner keeps telling you this, it is trap to make you balance out her cheating on you. She has done it already, she only wants you guys to be even without you knowing that you're just playing to her hands.

The biggest mistake you made here was confessing to her that you cheated. The balance of power has tilted in her favour. Only a DNA test on the secong child can possibly tilt it back in your favour, providing the result comes out negative.
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by Dexy4yah(m): 2:08pm On Nov 21, 2023
Some men are just unfortunate.....good men getting married to bad wives....that's the worst thing that can happen to any man...that's what my elder bro is suffering from today.


For the unmarried ones....there are still good women out there...plenty of them....just make the right choice

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by baralatie(m): 2:08pm On Nov 21, 2023
Ahmed0336:
Bro, this epistle fit kee pesin.


I was skipping some lines so my advice will come from the part I read.

1. You married a troublesome wife who is only using you to uplift herself and family by refusing to have a joint account.
2. If you did cheat, why would you confess to her? You go apologize tire for the rest of your life.
3. If you doubt being the father of that child, please do a DNA.
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by baralatie(m): 2:09pm On Nov 21, 2023
Dexy4yah:
Some men are just unfortunate.....good men getting married to bad wives....that's the worst thing that can happen to any man...that's what my elder bro is suffering from today.


For the unmarried ones....there are still good women out there...plenty of them....just make the right choice


Person wey dey knack for outside na good husband
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by rapcy(m): 2:10pm On Nov 21, 2023
Carcholce:
Wahala!!

I am not married but the points I noted from your post is that.

1. Don’t teach women how to fish, give them fish instead. When giving them the fish, make sure it’s only the head and the tail.


4. About your last born. Only God and DNA test knows the answer. Or you can simply approach your sister in law hubby and ask him if he mistakenly slept with your wife. Just be polite with the question.

grin grin grin
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by thinkmoney(m): 2:10pm On Nov 21, 2023
Carcholce:
Wahala!!

I am not married but the points I noted from your post is that.

1. Don’t teach women how to fish, give them fish instead. When giving them the fish, make sure it’s only the head and the tail.

2. Most women will hate you if you are nice man. I don’t know where the hate comes from. It seems natural. You have to be cruel to them, always make them remember the wrong things you did instead of the good. They’ll love you more.

3. If your wife pushes you out with her nagging and disrespectful behavior, and you really go out and start cheating/fornicating, it’s a trap. When you fall into the trap, you’ll fall so hard that you’ll lose more than you can ever recover. This is the ultimate test most men fail

4. About your last born. Only God and DNA test knows the answer. Or you can simply approach your sister in law hubby and ask him if he mistakenly slept with your wife. Just be polite with the question.
If u are courting and u notice the lady won’t be submissive, do not wife he even if you disflowered her whole generation. That’s one mistake u did.
Concerning the child, guilt is making u find a sin mate. You want proof to see that you are not the only one that have been unfaithful. From your writing, you are relatively well of. Do DNA for all your children secretly to calm your mind. Do not bring it up with anybody
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by indigenous234(f): 2:11pm On Nov 21, 2023
What is the nature of the business.... I would very much love to engage in something meaningful. I have 3 kids and every stream of income i can lay my hands on this period ehhh... Please I'm interested. Mentor me biko
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by baralatie(m): 2:11pm On Nov 21, 2023
Ijaya123:


If you're in a relationship and your partner keeps telling you this, it is trap to make you balance out her cheating on you. She has done it already, she only wants you guys to be even without you knowing that you're just playing to her hands.

The biggest mistake you made here was confessing to her that you cheated. The balance of power has tilted in her favour. Only a DNA test on the secong child can possibly tilt it back in your favour, providing the result comes out negative.
His confession that he cheated is not the problem.
It is the fact that he thinks tgegirl no sharp is his undoing
Girl wey sharp like razor blade na him the guy dey take play
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by Adasun(m): 2:12pm On Nov 21, 2023
I won't be surprise if op take permission from his wife before going for DNA test...

1 Like

Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by djon78(m): 2:13pm On Nov 21, 2023
Ishilove:

This fallacy has been repeated so much, many men are beginning to believe it.


Ishi I don prove this times and times again

Men that are too nice
Are the ones taking ride by there wives

Even my close relatives
Those ones there husband's no dey tolerate nonsense

Na them Dem dey fear

My cousin very stubborn
But you see her husband

He no dey take sh.it
If you see respect here
You go surprise

In addition
Your gender are very cunning and crafty though

And in addition
The specie of women they have now

Hmm I no fit talk
And that's why divorce is very rampant now


But if a man manage get good woman
Make he no carry am play
Lai Lai

1 Like

Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by baralatie(m): 2:13pm On Nov 21, 2023
thinkmoney:

If u are courting and u notice the lady won’t be submissive, do not wife he even if you disflowered her whole generation. That’s one mistake u did.
Concerning the child, guilt is making u find a sin mate. You want proof to see that you are not the only one that have been unfaithful. From your writing, you are relatively well of. Do DNA for all your children secretly to calm your mind. Do not bring it up with anybody
Is there a relationship between been submissive , cheating and self centeredness
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by baralatie(m): 2:15pm On Nov 21, 2023
djon78:



Ishi I don prove this times and times again

Men that are too nice
Are the ones taking ride by there wives

Even my close relatives
Those ones there husband's no dey tolerate nonsense

Na them Dem dey fear

My cousin very stubborn
But you see her husband

He no dey take sh.it
If you see respect here
You go surprise

In addition
Your gender are very cunning and crafty though

And in addition
The specie of women they have now

Hmm I no fit talk
And that's why divorce is very rampant now


But if a man manage get good woman
Make he no carry am play
Lai Lai
Husband catch fire for head is not a deterrent to a failed relationship
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by baralatie(m): 2:17pm On Nov 21, 2023
valentineuwakwe:
Are u a weakling? Take the bull by the horn..you earn 2.4m monthly and ordinary 30k DNA test they hard you to carry out on your last child!
Did you not see all this wen you were dating? Fix things up
Em how do you want him apart from DNA test go about fixing. Relationship where the woman has seen him as a low value
Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by Dexy4yah(m): 2:17pm On Nov 21, 2023
baralatie:

Person wey dey knack for outside na good husband

When you marry a toxic woman you will understand what the op is going thru

1 Like

Re: How Do I Confront My Wife With This Kind Of Question by baralatie(m): 2:19pm On Nov 21, 2023
Well
As you say you don born again
Make God guide you

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