A good friend should be able to confide in you in order to inspire or push you for the same glory.
However, if you're doing well too, just do same project and treat him with the same juice and let's see how he react.

Then you can know your best friend and draw a line.

Candidlady:
Men and their stupid entitleMENt MENtality

Ihave seen people build houses or even leave the country without their parents knowing


Yaro you are just a friend!! Get that into your shallow brain

So you fed him... Must we know.. Ubanka


Atleast he invited you.. You should be grateful..

When an ingrate and bastard talks you know with ease

I did same...... .... Alaye. Move on.. but in my own case na him dey Scot with me..... He later hear from an outsider... But kept mute.. later told him and he said he knew already. And. We just settle and drink two bottle day day..... He is pretty doing well financially.. just dat he is a G boy ... While me on the other hand is a legit hustler.

Peter532:
I don't know if I should be angry or just smile and take it as it is. This is someone that I fed, I clothed despite us being closed friends since we were kids. He knows everything about me that my parents don't even know till dates..We could go to a gathering together and I will be the one ordering and paying for everything we bought even recently because I always acted like the big bro and he accepted I guess .. Just last week I saw it on his status about is house opening invite. I later got a dm from him that same evening telling me about it that I should come through.

It came as a surprise I admit, even though I know he was doing quite well for himself. I know some will call it entitlement mentality but since I considered we were close like a brother we even ate from same plate last 2weeks, I thought I should have known atleast.

Note: I noticed so many people will come in here to call me names, even some accusing me to be someone with bad motives and sort I smile. Not everyone has a evil mindset like you or some persons you know, It's just that when you expect so much from people you hold very close to your heart you might get disappointed and it hurts badly.

Especially when you know you can't do that same thing to that person. I only brought it out here because I wanted to know maybe I'm overreacting because I feel a deep level of betrayal but hey I am happy for him and I will attend the house opening tomorrow.

File Photo for Illustration

I understand the feeling but it is what it is....Next time you don't tell him anything about your private life again.

just know that the police is a better friend than this your friend

Peter532:
I don't know if I should be angry or just smile and take it as it is. This is someone that I fed, I clothed despite us being closed friends since we were kids. He knows everything about me that my parents don't even know till dates..We could go to a gathering together and I will be the one ordering and paying for everything we bought even recently because I always acted like the big bro and he accepted I guess .. Just last week I saw it on his status about is house opening invite. I later got a dm from him that same evening telling me about it that I should come through.

It came as a surprise I admit, even though I know he was doing quite well for himself. I know some will call it entitlement mentality but since I considered we were close like a brother we even ate from same plate last 2weeks, I thought I should have known atleast.

Note: I noticed so many people will come in here to call me names, even some accusing me to be someone with bad motives and sort I smile. Not everyone has a evil mindset like you or some persons you know, It's just that when you expect so much from people you hold very close to your heart you might get disappointed and it hurts badly.

Especially when you know you can't do that same thing to that person. I only brought it out here because I wanted to know maybe I'm overreacting because I feel a deep level of betrayal but hey I am happy for him and I will attend the house opening tomorrow.

File Photo for Illustration

you are not overreacting because you are betrayed by your supposedly close friend,to tell you the house is a surprise is a cover up,he definitely do not trust you,deep in his mind he will think you will scuttle the house project by any means left to you,that is why he decided not to tell you,I am sorry a friend with such mindset is not your friend because there are more things you don't even know about him,he will now see your reaction. as jealousy but if you can mask your emotions and show him less of your own intentions and future plans,

1. It will definitely hurt. You should feel sad about it. Everyone will.
However, don't take it too personal else you are labeled an enemy of progress.
You must withdraw smartly from this so called friend, he is or never was a friend.
Reduce your engagements with him, focus on yourself and family.

2. You need to understand that so many children are here, teenagers and the rest...they don't really understand lifes intricacies at least yet. So they will always give their opinions naively.

You be basket mouth, or you go cast am to his village people. Na make am he nor tell you. Nor vex for him

Candidlady:
Men and their stupid entitleMENt MENtality

Ihave seen people build houses or even leave the country without their parents knowing


Yaro you are just a friend!! Get that into your shallow brain

So you fed him... Must we know.. Ubanka


Atleast he invited you.. You should be grateful..

You sound bitter and you're insulting the guy. Why?

He doesn't owe you that though.

Peter532:
I don't know if I should be angry or just smile and take it as it is. This is someone that I fed, I clothed despite us being closed friends since we were kids. He knows everything about me that my parents don't even know till dates..We could go to a gathering together and I will be the one ordering and paying for everything we bought even recently because I always acted like the big bro and he accepted I guess .. Just last week I saw it on his status about is house opening invite. I later got a dm from him that same evening telling me about it that I should come through.

It came as a surprise I admit, even though I know he was doing quite well for himself. I know some will call it entitlement mentality but since I considered we were close like a brother we even ate from same plate last 2weeks, I thought I should have known atleast.

Note: I noticed so many people will come in here to call me names, even some accusing me to be someone with bad motives and sort I smile. Not everyone has a evil mindset like you or some persons you know, It's just that when you expect so much from people you hold very close to your heart you might get disappointed and it hurts badly.

Especially when you know you can't do that same thing to that person. I only brought it out here because I wanted to know maybe I'm overreacting because I feel a deep level of betrayal but hey I am happy for him and I will attend the house opening tomorrow.

File Photo for Illustration

What is the problem here

You see him as a close brother, are you going to force him to do the same?

This is same problem we have in marriage, men love a woman who only cares about what he can provide and later cry.

Op for you not to see any clue he doesn't treat you the same up till now means you are not smart but a needy attached fo.ol

Jones90:


I understand where you are coming from, but you know it takes some months to build a house and during these periods of time, the acclaimed friend of the OP would have been dining and wining with the OP without telling him that he's building a house. He intentionally kept it secret from the OP.

Personally I don't see any sense in it. Telling the OP will not stop him from building his house, why then keep it a secret from him?

It is his choice respect that.

What should worry us is that op didn't see any clue of him not being a close friend up till now which shows that op is a dull thing.

We should all wise up

ItisWell22:


And this is why the op is hurting.
He took this guy as a brother and had no secrets with him.

Let’s all be realistic and stop all this stoicism; it’s painful.

If op had seen the guy as just another of his guys, e for no pain am.
But he took this guy as a brother and hid nothing from him.
Why should he hide such huge leap from op?
So op doesn’t wake up from his slumber if he probably hasn’t built his own house?
Then he isn’t a good friend.

Op, learn your lesson and move.
He was never a friend.
Or probably, never valued you as much as you valued him.

Reason why I just expect nothing from no one and expect everyone to disappoint me; ahead, ahead…

Op is the problem, he doesn't have sense.

It's not about what you call or take someone as it's about what he calls or takes you as.

I am glad he just learnt his major life lesson.

No sensible person shares personal things in the name of friendship that can change with weather.

The friend is wiser and he should learn from him

My brother give him space. I have a close friend like that. We do everything together. When i was leaving the country he knows everything. I even travel from is house. He never told me about is own travel plan. I got to know after 1 month on social media. We do chat every day he never told me he was no longer in the Nigeria. Now me too don learn

Candidlady:
Men and their stupid entitleMENt MENtality

Ihave seen people build houses or even leave the country without their parents knowing


Yaro you are just a friend!! Get that into your shallow brain

So you fed him... Must we know.. Ubanka


Atleast he invited you.. You should be grateful..

Your comment just reeks of STUPIDITY

Peter532:
I don't know if I should be angry or just smile and take it as it is. This is someone that I fed, I clothed despite us being closed friends since we were kids. He knows everything about me that my parents don't even know till dates..We could go to a gathering together and I will be the one ordering and paying for everything we bought even recently because I always acted like the big bro and he accepted I guess .. Just last week I saw it on his status about is house opening invite. I later got a dm from him that same evening telling me about it that I should come through.

It came as a surprise I admit, even though I know he was doing quite well for himself. I know some will call it entitlement mentality but since I considered we were close like a brother we even ate from same plate last 2weeks, I thought I should have known atleast.

Note: I noticed so many people will come in here to call me names, even some accusing me to be someone with bad motives and sort I smile. Not everyone has a evil mindset like you or some persons you know, It's just that when you expect so much from people you hold very close to your heart you might get disappointed and it hurts badly.

Especially when you know you can't do that same thing to that person. I only brought it out here because I wanted to know maybe I'm overreacting because I feel a deep level of betrayal but hey I am happy for him and I will attend the house opening tomorrow.

File Photo for Illustration

You are not overreacting. God is just showing you "one or two mistakes in your goodness".

Like always buying/paying for the food.

You should have allowed him to do likewise. Jokingly tell him from time to time, "Enyi na you go feed us today as fellow big man -- you think say we no know?"

1. To be truly good, influence others to replicate your goodness.

"Be not overmuch good" - Ecclesiastes

But for the past, forget it. Just better in the future.

Candidlady:
Men and their stupid entitleMENt MENtality

Ihave seen people build houses or even leave the country without their parents knowing


Yaro you are just a friend!! Get that into your shallow brain

So you fed him... Must we know.. Ubanka


Atleast he invited you.. You should be grateful..

No.... A friend is ride or die, why he is hurt is because he would have done anything for that same guy. He just found out the guy has no love for him and Envy's him. When people envy you they become very secretive about their affairs and relations with you.
The loser here is the friend....

Nor vex i just see say you be lady....

you nor go understand sha

Nebes:


You don't know this OP oh!
There may be something about him that made his friend to seal such a secret. For the OP to be feeling the way he is feeling now says a lot about him.
Don't underestimate the power of envy. It can mount roadblocks for the envied.

Shut up ur mouth

Candidlady:
Men and their stupid entitleMENt MENtality

Ihave seen people build houses or even leave the country without their parents knowing


Yaro you are just a friend!! Get that into your shallow brain

So you fed him... Must we know.. Ubanka

Everything you labelled it entilet


Atleast he invited you.. You should be grateful..

Exactly what Op made mention of.. everything is not all about entitlement mentality..you dey here dey shout it..imagine been a very very close friend to someone one and embarked on such project he didn't tell you. That means you ain't a freinds to him you re just a frenemies to him..he is afraid of you

brain54:

If this guy is your only friend…

Then just take it that you no get friend.

You are friendless like this!

I support u bro.

brain54:

Just because people do certain things…

Don’t make it right. How can any sane person travel out of the country without their parents knowledge- if they are in good terms?

If na you wear the shoe how you go feel?

And na women Dey feel emotional about these things pass o.!

Sometimes telling people your plan can ruin the plan. Some opinion can discourage your destiny. God created secrets for a reason. Not telling your parents your plans does not make you foolish. I know many people that completed their house before telling their parents. I know people who told their parents and friends they bought land but never built the house, instead they end up selling the land. Life is deeper into than you think.

izibili44:
My brother give him space. I have a close friend like that. We do everything together. When i was leaving the country he knows everything. I even travel from is house. He never told me about is own travel plan. I got to know after 1 month on social media. We do chat every day he never told me he was no longer in the Nigeria. Now me too don learn

Telling him your plan was stupid. I thank God you have learnt. Don't expect people to open their plans to you.

If your conscience is true to you, it won’t let you attend
For me, I will not attend not because I envy him, never!
He is simply not a friend
Do you know how long it takes to build? That’s how long he kept it away
There may be more secrets he is yet to post

Going through comments here, you can see men's opinion defers from women's own. If the op is a married many then I will suggest his wife was the architect of this. She might have advised the op to keep it as a secret from his friend.
Women and selfishness are 5 and 6

Instead of being angry, just stop telling him things make your life private.

I use to have a good heart like you. Experiences like what happened to you change my mindset few years back.

Englishisamust:


Will not stop what!!!!

.....Sigma Rule.....
Rule Number 1; Don't trust Anybody
Rules Number 2: Follow Rule Number 1

For Op to Broadcast what is friend did here shows the reason why is friend dont want to tell him.
Your best friend may be your greatest enemy. We have see many news of people been killed or disappointed for putting trust in their love ones.
As long as you are not hurting anyone or killing anyone. Do your shit and don't care about what anybody say.... Op friend is my type..... you can avoid some experience by learning from those that have experience it..

My sentiments exactly.
I am just like the OP friend.

I don't tell people my moves.
Though in my case,,I don't have close friends like that.
I am more like a lone ranger.

The day I moved to my house, I just told my pastor who was going to pray on the house that I want to take him somewhere.
Till he got there he never knew he was going to pray on my house.

It was when we got there that he knew what he was following me to do.
And this is someone we work hand in hand in church.

If he likes make he vex, not my problem.
As long as my joy is intact.
My joy is never dependent on how others feel about me.

And that's why, me self no dey expect nothing.

How about when we moved to the house from the previous house we were living in. I only dropped a notice in our group chat. That was my way of informing them.

Yes THEY WERE ALL ANGRY. In fact the whole estate carried our news for as long as they could. Some of them no even greet me to wish me congratulations, as in they just read my notice and moved on.
Hahahahahaha

I no send anybody.
I am not Into competition with anyone.
If you are happy, good for you.
If you are not, better, your headache.

Aiye yi ole.
Na we dey make am hard.

What I want is what I want.
I won't do what you want in the name of making you happy.

So OP, just wish him well and move on.

Of course, this means you also have to decide the information you release out there.

Jones90:


I understand where you are coming from, but you know it takes some months to build a house and during these periods of time, the acclaimed friend of the OP would have been dining and wining with the OP without telling him that he's building a house. He intentionally kept it secret from the OP.

Personally I don't see any sense in it. Telling the OP will not stop him from building his house, why then keep it a secret from him?

Some people always prefer to pipe-low and keep their plans secret until they have achieved their success and that does not mean they are evil or not your friend. They may even be better friends than those who always tell you everything about themselves. He not telling you maybe as a result of the fact that he knew if he had told, there would be someone you would tell which he is not comfortable with.

Maybe you can ask him why he did not tell you.

Honestly I don't believe one sided stories like this anymore. If you don't hear from the other guy don't believe this very dude. Believe me you must have done same thing to him way back because from your own story line you are doing well for long even when he doesn't have anything. Believe me you must have offended many times. Any story you see online about 2 friends living together and one has been doing well before the other one get up on his feet. believe me that first guy must have hurt the other guy numerous times. Asked yourself if all the properties the first guy bought was know by the second guy. Never judge or conclude on any stories without hearing from the other partner.

Some people always prefer to keep a low profile and keep their plans secret until they have achieved success, and that does not mean they are evil or not your friend. They may even be better friends than those who always tell you everything about themselves.

Maybe he did not tell you because he knows that if he had shared, there would be someone you might tell, and he is not comfortable with that. Some people also prefer to keep their plans secret and only announce their results because it gives them the motivation to achieve their plans.

Maybe you can ask him why he did not tell you.

That is the world for you, I, was in my junior bro,s house on Sunday he never told me that he want to buy land, next week Sunday my mum told me he bought a land,my brother that I, love so much how does that sound to you.

Peter532:
I don't know if I should be angry or just smile and take it as it is. This is someone that I fed, I clothed despite us being closed friends since we were kids. He knows everything about me that my parents don't even know till dates..We could go to a gathering together and I will be the one ordering and paying for everything we bought even recently because I always acted like the big bro and he accepted I guess .. Just last week I saw it on his status about is house opening invite. I later got a dm from him that same evening telling me about it that I should come through.

It came as a surprise I admit, even though I know he was doing quite well for himself. I know some will call it entitlement mentality but since I considered we were close like a brother we even ate from same plate last 2weeks, I thought I should have known atleast.

Note: I noticed so many people will come in here to call me names, even some accusing me to be someone with bad motives and sort I smile. Not everyone has a evil mindset like you or some persons you know, It's just that when you expect so much from people you hold very close to your heart you might get disappointed and it hurts badly.

Especially when you know you can't do that same thing to that person. I only brought it out here because I wanted to know maybe I'm overreacting because I feel a deep level of betrayal but hey I am happy for him and I will attend the house opening tomorrow.

File Photo for Illustration

Dey play, my blood brother completed his house and still no tell me, u are here complaining about ur friend. U better hustle up man.