₦airaland Forum

morethanadoll:
I agree with this statement. I don't care how much money a guy has. If he can't make me laugh, be romantic without spending a dime, and I don't enjoy being in his presence, all of his fortune means nothing. I make my own money and can provide for myself. I look for a man to grow old and share life with, not for the dollars.

eden2015:
Who has bought this Charles' Bang Rule so far?
I mean hope its genuine and not a scam.

NLers has any1 among y used d ebook?
Cause I cant waste my penny o.

RAKITIC:
A broke guy can never be ROMANTIC

sinizia:
You're confused. At one point you are arguing that money can't bring girls (not all girls) flocking to a guy and in the second embolden sentence you are acceding to the fact that money gets girls flocking unto a guy. you are just contradicting yourself.

Now talking about love, that's a different issue all together. It has nothing to do with the subject matter you are trying to argue against. When guys say money get girls coming at them like sugar ants to a sugar, they are not talking about love. They mean a good time - séx, flings, one night stands, etc. They know the ladies they're looking for are not rushing them for love. It's more like spend the money and get in between their legs. When such guys want to settle down, they play a different game. They search more carefully for that special person. So yes, money gets many girls (not all girls) flocking to a guy. It's sacrosanct!!

morethanadoll:
I agree with this statement. I don't care how much money a guy has. If he can't make me laugh, be romantic without spending a dime, and I don't enjoy being in his presence, all of his fortune means nothing. I make my own money and can provide for myself. I look for a man to grow old and share life with, not for the dollars.

SkinnyDude:
charles, what advise do you have for a guy who stutters? he's afraid of being embarrassed. he hasn't toasted any babe before, and havent dated. he feels he's not a boyfriend material.
how does he regain his confidence

CharlesNneji1:
First, before you get someone to like you, you have to first love yourself.

I know, this sounds like a textbook advice but that's just the truth.

Regaining a battered confidence takes time and inferiority complex don't disappear overnight. Infact, motivational books will always preach "positive thinking" but the fact still remains that it doesn't work - positive think from today till tomorrow, if you don't act you will never improve.

For someone like that, who has a battered self esteem, my advice is not to "toast girls" yet.

What he has to do is to start doing "positive actions"

What is "positive action"

Simple: start doing things, little by little, which would trick your mind into not fearing what you were once afraid of, and while doing this - NEVER JUDGE each action and fight the negative thoughts that come up for such action.

Let me make it clearer

For example: a guy who is always afraid of talking to girls could just start with saying "Good day" to every girl he comes in contact with.

For instance; walk into a restaurant, sit on a table near a girl turn, say "hi, good day" then face your table.

Church, want to joing the pew: "hi, good day"

It's easier than a full blown toasting.

The more this guys does the "hi good day" routine the more he finds out he is becoming less intimidated by saying "hi, good morning to a girl"

His mind has been tricked.

When this is achieved, he should move over to the question stage and throw in the "hi goodmorning" routine:

For instance:

"Hi, good morning, what's the time please"

"Hi, good morning. What's the name for your hairstyle. I want my sister to get it"

"Hi goodmorning, I just leaned on a dirty chair - is my back dusty"

Get her reply, say thanks and walk away

You get the gist? I know, it sounds silly - but it works.

After you are comfortable asking questions you will find out you are more relaxed, your confidence grows because you find out that saying hi to a girl is not as intimidating as it once was - that is when you start working on keeping a conversation.

If you jump directly into been a casanova or getting a girlfriend it won't work. And the more things don't work the more you get discouraged.

Also, while you do this - throw in the "pretty girl chewing guming" trick I outlined up there.
The mind is stubborn...to bend it to your will, you have to trick it.

To the stuttering part; it's your mind. When you concentrate a lot on how your voice sounds that's when you stutter

Try this: Play a loud song through an earpiece then when you can't hear your voice - record yourself say something long, then play the recording - you will be amazed how reduced your stuttering would be.

To stop stuttering, you need to stop been self-conscious about your voice. To stop been self-conscious you don't just need positive words; you need positive actions.

Answer questions in a group class, then tell yourself you sounded well - yes, your mind won't believe that but here is the big secret of psychology: When you lie to yourself long enough you will start believing it's true.

It will take time, but it always works.

Hope this helped. Have a great day.

SkinnyDude:
thanxs. will start practising it..
did you study psychology in school? cos you are good in it

code6:
@ op.....u re seriously deceiving ur self.......Bros if u re nt well organized, NO gud lady will accept u.......its only MONEY dat wil create a vry conducive environment 4 love 2 grow.......its what u can offer dat gives u self confidence b4 a lady...unless u re watching nollywood or bollywood

CharlesNneji1:
Ok

Mubbyleey:
hey bro! I don't know if u still remember me. I was the guy dat asked u if i shud call a girl on her birthday. And u told me 2do so and gave me some tips... I'm here again, i need ya help about same girl. Ever since her birthday & since we dn resume 4 school, hav been avoiding & ignoring her... I dnt gv her my attentions anymore.

How long shud i keep ignoring her so dat it wnt back fire...?

Am sure she knws am avoiding her coz she sees me everyday & she doesnt care to call me or sumtn. I dnt even knw if wot am doing moves her sef.

Then if i shud tok 2 her or we mistakenly jam each other, what shud i do then, what shud i say to her? How long shud i keep d game going? Coz i dnt wanna lose her.
Please help me out bro...

CharlesNneji1:
Lol, no bro...you are getting it wrong.

You are not to IGNORE her. Next you see her, say hi to her, have a nice laugh with her, be friendly.

Why would you totally ignore someone you are interested in? how then will you form the much needed rapport with her? i'm sure you haven't read my e-book. If you had you wouldn't have any problem with this.

The trick is not to ignore a girl you like, the whole sermon is to be MORE IN CONTROL. To be less Boring, More funny, Give her much more breathing space. Tease her. Project value.

morethanadoll:
I agree with this statement. I don't care how much money a guy has. If he can't make me laugh, be romantic without spending a dime, and I don't enjoy being in his presence, all of his fortune means nothing. I make my own money and can provide for myself. I look for a man to grow old and share life with, not for the dollars.

CharlesNneji1:
First, before you get someone to like you, you have to first love yourself.

I know, this sounds like a textbook advice but that's just the truth.

Regaining a battered confidence takes time and inferiority complex don't disappear overnight. Infact, motivational books will always preach "positive thinking" but the fact still remains that it doesn't work - positive think from today till tomorrow, if you don't act you will never improve.

For someone like that, who has a battered self esteem, my advice is not to "toast girls" yet.

What he has to do is to start doing "positive actions"

What is "positive action"

Simple: start doing things, little by little, which would trick your mind into not fearing what you were once afraid of, and while doing this - NEVER JUDGE each action and fight the negative thoughts that come up for such action.

Let me make it clearer

For example: a guy who is always afraid of talking to girls could just start with saying "Good day" to every girl he comes in contact with.

For instance; walk into a restaurant, sit on a table near a girl turn, say "hi, good day" then face your table.

Church, want to joing the pew: "hi, good day"

It's easier than a full blown toasting.

The more this guys does the "hi good day" routine the more he finds out he is becoming less intimidated by saying "hi, good morning to a girl"

His mind has been tricked.

When this is achieved, he should move over to the question stage and throw in the "hi goodmorning" routine:

For instance:

"Hi, good morning, what's the time please"

"Hi, good morning. What's the name for your hairstyle. I want my sister to get it"

"Hi goodmorning, I just leaned on a dirty chair - is my back dusty"

Get her reply, say thanks and walk away

You get the gist? I know, it sounds silly - but it works.

After you are comfortable asking questions you will find out you are more relaxed, your confidence grows because you find out that saying hi to a girl is not as intimidating as it once was - that is when you start working on keeping a conversation.

If you jump directly into been a casanova or getting a girlfriend it won't work. And the more things don't work the more you get discouraged.

Also, while you do this - throw in the "pretty girl chewing guming" trick I outlined up there.
The mind is stubborn...to bend it to your will, you have to trick it.

To the stuttering part; it's your mind. When you concentrate a lot on how your voice sounds that's when you stutter

Try this: Play a loud song through an earpiece then when you can't hear your voice - record yourself say something long, then play the recording - you will be amazed how reduced your stuttering would be.

To stop stuttering, you need to stop been self-conscious about your voice. To stop been self-conscious you don't just need positive words; you need positive actions.

Answer questions in a group class, then tell yourself you sounded well - yes, your mind won't believe that but here is the big secret of psychology: When you lie to yourself long enough you will start believing it's true.

It will take time, but it always works.

Hope this helped. Have a great day.

morethanadoll:
I agree with this statement. I don't care how much money a guy has. If he can't make me laugh, be romantic without spending a dime, and I don't enjoy being in his presence, all of his fortune means nothing. I make my own money and can provide for myself. I look for a man to grow old and share life with, not for the dollars.

RAKITIC:
A broke guy can never be ROMANTIC

CharlesNneji1:
I was driving back from my office this afternoon when the idea for this article hit me. For a moment i thought about parking my car by the side of the road to pull out my laptop and write this but thought against it; stopping to type by the road seemed too "crase-manish" for my liking...

But still;

THE EXCITEMENT TO WRITE THIS WAS THAT STRONG...

Now, stay with me - this is very important. The thing about these reasons i will list out in a moment is that they are not really a secret, i tagged it "secret" because guys hide these problems of theirs and keep it to themselves

I spent the whole of last night replying tons of email from guys who are going through hell in the hands of Girls they like; reading those emails was really a painful experience - nothing pains me like seeing a guy been treated like he is nothing by a girl he is crazy about.

This is why i do this; to make sure that as many guys as i can reach with my articles would never make the same mistakes that get girls to take them less seriously.

*smiles*

Of course, not everyone will like these articles - infact, most people won't agree with them. But it's fine - na so life be - everybody must not agree with you and you mustn't say things just to impress people.

Now; lets get to business.

#1: THE "MONEY WILL GET GIRLS FLOCKING TO ME" MENTALITY:

Trust me, i have come to find out that when a guy says: "get money first and girls will come flocking around you", such guys usually say this because they have been frustrated by girls in the past. such guys get so frustrated that, to console themselves, they "wish" for a time when they will have a fat bank account and girls will come rushing into their arms.

THIS IS PURE FANTASY - Wake up, bro.

Also, most of these guys freak out when they see a girl they like, some of them cannot even hold a conversation with a female for 5 minutes.

See, don't get me wrong - having money is cool, pull up with a Bugatti to a party and girls will look at you like "who is that boy". Some would even want you to get them pregnant.

But here is the hard plain truth...

At a point in time you start wondering if these girls really like you or if they like your money.

Money brings you lazy, materialistic, cheating, "no dream" kind of girls who just want to stay at home and make babies and eat. If that is the kind of girl you want, then i agree with you - money will get them flocking to you (For sure)

But when it gets to getting a girl who has real value, who has a job, rides her own car (My type of girl) - you have to show her something else; money alone can't get her interested in you - you have to dazzle her with your personality and when your personality is wack - guy, nothing for you.

I have very rich friends, when i mean rich, i mean - RICH. I have worked with over a dozen extremely wealthy guys and they all have the same problem, which is: "How Do I find a girl who is not just interested in my money", "how do i find a girl who will love me for who i am"

*Go and listen to chorus of Iyanya's Orei - he is presently having that same problem too*

I hear alot of guy say things like: "be ugly, have a bad personality, have pot belly, have mouth odor - but once you have money girls will throw themselves at you".

This maybe true, gold digging girls will scramble over such a guy (I no go drag am with una).

but the question is this...

- Do they really like him??
- Will they be faithful to him if a better guy shows up?
- Will they stay on if the money dries up?

Think about that.

If you are the type that tremble when you talk to a girl, getting rich won't solve that fear - you are still the same guy, bro.
If you are a boring guy when you are broke, get rich - you are still boring, bro.

Moreover, the richer you get the more quality women you will meet. This women will have their own money and won't give a damn about yours. This women meet guys who are way richer than you everyday; the competition go still dey bro.

You need something more than money - You need a charming personality. Simple and short. If you Like console yourself from today reach tomorrow, money won't erase your lack of a charming personality (for those who don't have one).

Funny thing is that most broke guys go after girls with this mentality - they buy her gifts, pay her school fees, send her recharge card upon recharge card - and still get dumped.

Haba na


www.facebook.com/attractbabes

emrain:
save your energy bro. money answereth all things....

if you have too much money, there's no way you can't make a conversation last more than 1 hr. all you have to do is sit and watch her do all the talking.

CharlesNneji1:
#2. FEAR

Do you know that most guys shiver and sweat all over just at the mere THOUGHT of walking up to a girl they like - some of these guys even go as far as been single all their adult lives believing that when they get money it would be easier, at the end of the day they end up not been as rich as the thought they would be or end up having their mother look for a wife for them or end up marrying someone they don't like just because na only she gree for them, or end up (should i go on??).

I recently read a post by Farano on how "sweet" it is for guys to be shy sometimes.

Well, i guess the keyword there is SOMETIMES.

If you are the type who ALWAYS get the shivers EVERY SINGLE time you think of walking up to a girl you are interested in then you need to work on that fear ASAP.

See eh, most of the time all the terrible things you think will happen when you approach a girl will just not happen - trust me.

- She will laugh at me.
- She will embarrass me.
- She will shout at me if i talk to her....

All these are just your imagination playing tricks on you.

Yes, there are really childish saucy girls out there who will go all out to embarrass a guy just for saying hi.

But the truth is that most girls are really very nice wonderful tender things, only if you approach them right. The reaction You get from a girl will DEPEND ON HOW YOU APPROACH HER

- I mean; why would you walk up to a girl and say something silly like: "Hey, BABY " (You be American Gangster?)

- What do you expect when you walk up to a girl YOU ARE JUST MEETING for the first time and start telling her how much you love her (Of course she will embarrass you na). Girls of value don't fall for that trash.

- Why on earth will you expect to be respected by a girl when you can't even look her in the eye while you talk (By the way; will soon release a free report on how to eliminate fear of approaching girls; like my page: www.facebook.com/attractbabes to grab the info when it is released)

I know, guys who have this problem wish they can just take a pill that will completely eliminate the fear they feel around a girl they like.

But bro, here is the plain truth - in as much as you want sharp sharp easy change, the truth is that it will NEVER happen.

To eliminate the fear of approaching pretty girls, girls you like or every girl in general, you have to GRADUALLY work on yourself.

Over the years i have helped guys eliminate this fear using a method i call "Fine girl Chewing Gum". If you are shy around girls or feel afraid walking up to them, this strategy i am about to show you will help in drastically reducing that fear by 70%

Here is how it works:

- Look for a pretty girl who doesn't seem like the gossiping type (She must be very pretty).

- Walk up to her (feel free to tremble when you meet her), Tell her you want her help. tell her you get scared around girls and you believe hanging around her will help. at this point she will start to freak out, like, which kind mumu boy be this...don't let the eye she will give you get to you. Tell her you are not attracted to her, make she no fear - that all you want is just to be her friend. To hang around her

NOTE: DON'T FALL IN LOVE WITH HER because IT WON'T WORK, A GIRL WHO KNOWS THAT YOU GET SCARED AROUND GIRLS WOULD NEVER FEEL A THING FOR YOU (unless you jaz her.

- After she has agreed to be your friend; start using her to improve - call her up, make conversation with her then ask her to tell you where and where you were boring, hang out with her. as in, become her buddy - she should be like your manest man - do practically everything with her (but don't overdo it, she is seeing you as a nuisance already - if you chewing gum the poor thing all the time it will freak her out).

Now here is why this strategy works so well in eliminating women related shyness in guys.

The more you get to know her the more you find out that girls are HUMAN - Just like you, she dey mess, she squeezes her face when passing out "stuffs" in the loo, her mouth stinks when she wakes up in the morning.

simple basic psychology 101; these realization makes you find her less intimidating and the more you find her less intimidating the more you find other girls less intimidating.

She will introduce you to her "fine fine" friends, plus plenty other benefits....

IT ALWAYS WORKS; i have watched over a hundred guys i have worked with use this simple psychology secret to improve.

When you keep approaching girls with the intention to date them, they will keep rejecting you when they notice your timidity, and the more they reject you the more your ego is hurt and the more timid you become.

You go soon marry, so invest in your social skill around girls or else na your mother go find woman for you

*smiles*

I reject it for you, bro.

morethanadoll:
I agree with this statement. I don't care how much money a guy has. If he can't make me laugh, be romantic without spending a dime, and I don't enjoy being in his presence, all of his fortune means nothing. I make my own money and can provide for myself. I look for a man to grow old and share life with, not for the dollars.

ALKARULEZZ:
dis ur "k" dey fall pesin hand anyhow o bros

D guy jur weak