₦airaland Forum

bonsue1118:
Gud pm, my ex his begging me 2 come bak 2 him, bt d prob I av wit him is he womanise a lot. Am in love wit anoda person, bt he smokes, d person am in love wit truly love me, bt my fear is his habit. Pls am confused right nw, I need ur advices. Tnks.

Smoking can be stopped. When I met my hubby, he was a smoker and since I'm allergic to cigarettes, he had to stop and with time and distance from his old friends(who influenced him) he totally detest smoking. Discuss with him about it and I believe he'll change.

gleatz:
@MOCA
Differen gals have different reasons why they tends to help their broke guys. I will speak for mysef, I love extremely and selflessly, I can do anything to make anyone I love comfortable and happy.

I gave out cash not cos I was thinking he would in turn marry me but cos ve a large heart and won't love to see my guy gnash teeth in pain.

Currently, my ex is owing me some cash, but one thing I know is that some of this cash I did not give it out totaly, some we loans. Since we broke up he has refused to pay back, one thing is sure, even if he's given 10yrs added to his age, he can't finish paying all he's owing and that does not make me less human or financially down. Its up to him.

Events of the past has thought me a great deal, my motto now is "Any money I can't dash out freely, I won't borrow anybody" and its beeing working for me. Same way am not ready to mother any guy for now.

It won't stop me from being a giver.
Its just painful when you see all you worked for crumbling before your eyes. Shit happens though. We learn everyday.

I like that u are not allowing anybody to change who you are

Preternatura1:
If only there was a way to really show you how grateful I am for your help so far, thank you so much.

I will do my best to make sure he is not disrespected in any way, though it's just that what he may consider 'disrespect' might be different from how my family view it, still I will put more effort to make it work. My family is not used to the idea of him yet as I don't live in the same state with them(I visit on holidays and some weekends) so they don't get to see him a lot but I know that will change now as mother will like to scrutinize before giving approval, I will try to be more supportive of him.

I have learnt how to cook some foods because of him, I go to church with him sometimes, I didn't really grow up with church but I remember attending mass with nannies when I was younger and after high school that didn't really stick, so going to church with him is something he really appreciates but I don't know if I can continue , I do house chores that I can, sometimes, because he thinks it's not proper that I didn't use to.

He is a good man, he is very patient with me, does my laundry, cooks and I've noticed that I don't have the kind of problems my sister,cousins and some friends have with their relationships, they usually suspect their men of cheating, he is somewhat different from the kind of men I'm surrounded by, guess this is why we came this far.

I'm beginning to think I let my fears in and that is what is affecting our sex life, I am now ready to work on this with hope that there be fire again.

Once again, thank you very much, I feel greatly relived. It's amazing how strangers can be so helpful, I'm very thankful to Google for leading me here.

I dont feel good about this. I am not married and would not give consideration to a man I have this much differences with.

It is important to you that your family members respect this man. You can't force it, he'll have to earn it and you won't be there all the time to make him act right.

You need to agree on how to raise your children to avoid future problems.

My other concern is his mother. Will you want a MIL drama? the mama seems like one you will have a lot of explaining to do to.I Can't even fathom her asking you to cook on the first meeting. she probably was testing your skills and u'll av much more cooking to do for her.

The best thing is to marry someone u share a lot with. He will easily understand why you are doing what and your marriage can be more fun than hardwork.

softysparky:
You sound just like me...
Are you my twin?

Softysparkyy;
You got me laughing indeed. We might just be twins of the same opinion.
My dear, God is our strenght.

Hundred oen won't stop us from being givers. ##winks# its there lost dear.

cococandy:
Invite us to the wedding o

I have a gele that I haven't worn For once. I need to attend a wedding so bad in that gele

Best of luck dear

I would love to have you there hopefully, if that's something you are up to .

Thank you Ms.

Yadoctora:
I like that u are not allowing anybody to change who you are

@Yadoctora:
Thanks darl. Its not easy but with God on my side, I won't change being good with loads of caution this time.
Before I allow some uncircumsized philistines shatter my love life.

gleatz:
Softysparkyy;
You got me laughing indeed. We might just be twins of the same opinion.
My dear, God is our strenght.

Hundred oen won't stop us from being givers. ##winks# its there lost dear.

I need a giver.

Khabuqi:
I need a giver.

Khabuqi:
You need a giver as what?
Scriptures says let he who wants friends, be indeed friendly. In that light, if you want/need a giver, you should also be a giver and you would attract your kind.

gleatz:
Khabuqi:
You need a giver as what?
Scriptures says let he who wants friends, be indeed friendly. In that light, if you want/need a giver, you should also be a giver and you would attract your kind.

What scripture?
I need a girl that will be giving money. I'm tired of being the spender.

nannymcphee:
My apologies for not quoting your whole post, I hope what I quoted will not be taken out of context.

Compatibility issues comes to mind here, some are minor & can & should be overlooked while others are major & should not be overlooked

You have a particular class & I will advise you go for that class because with the quotes below, if you go into marriage with him without reaching a genuine compromise(not the one he will agree to ur terms now, meanwhile planning a different thing for you after marriage)



Should you go ahead with the wedding, you will resent him & alienate your kids against him, imagine u scolding junior for eating loud & his defense will be that's how daddy does it, you find urself correcting him, you are indirectly telling him daddy is a bush man

The above secenerio will play out in other circumstances




Here again, compatibility, these issues you raised above can cause serious issues, should junior misbehave you can't tell him not to spank or flog his own child!!

He might not be the type that will eat food not prepared by you but you on the other hand grew up with maids




it appears you are living as though you are not in Nigeria(there is nothing wrong with that per say, just look for someone that shares same traits)


No Nigerian adult will accept that from a younger one to be "quiet", that's akin to shut up

You obviously didn't see that much of a big deal, I know kids abroad tell their parents to shut up either jokingly or seriously depending on the context & most don't see it as a biggie

you talked about the gown part, he was taking you to his mum & you couldn't agree with him on what to wear, haba

I'm not married o but I'm sure the average married woman dresses according to the husband's taste(make una correct me o)

my dear look for a good man amongst your class & save yourself from unnecessary heartache, continue with him on the grounds that you have reached a "genuine compromise" or he shows & proves that he is willing to change to your way of living

Most Nigerian men don't believe in changing for a woman, most times just to win her, they do so but after marriage, Ghen Ghen!!!!

Hi, you are free to address the issue from areas you choose, and thank you for your thoughtful input, it means alot.

Having read and pondered on the advice I've been given on here, I am genuinely willing to compromise, like I've been told, I have to realize we are from different backgrounds and bearing this in mind will help me(i sincerely hope).

I do have the fear of him changing like I've mentioned somewhere on this thread, I didn't really think too much on this because he has never been forceful with the way he thinks things should be done(he is soft spoken)till I started reading the stories here how people change after marriage, the things he has gotten me to do so far have been at my own pace, that's why I said he is very patient with me, I guess I just have to continue believing he won't change for the worse.

To be honest, I'm a little worried on the kids issue especially on discipline, he is not a mean person and he said only a beast will be happy seeing his kids hurt, that he will flog them only lovingly for the best, I myself have never been flogged by anyone(not that I remember)so I don't really understand it, he says I'm a good girl and not troublesome, perhaps that's why I didn't get beaten so he will only beat if it's very necessary, I guess I can live with this.

If I'm being totally honest, I must let you know that his etiquette has improved a great deal from when we first met, I just think it's taking longer than it should that's why I was worried but since most people here think we'll rub off on each other, would it be f00lish to hope for the best?

Most kids in my family are bred overseas and some are sent to school overseas, we are just a closely knit family that celebrate together alot,he and I are yet to reach an agreement on where ours will be raised, I hope this goes in my favor.

He has no problems with what I wear per se, he just said his mum wouldn't like it as it will be termed indecent by her, I refused because I didn't want to pretend. His mum is not really learned and he says she won't be in our lives, so I shouldn't be worried about her.

I know I might sound like I'm not really sure what I want but I'm sure he is a good man, I know no one is perfect, the truth is, is that I didn't really know much about other backgrounds till I met him, so I don't want to seem like a snob by writing him off, which is part of why I didn't go to my people for advice and why we came thus far, I was kinda fascinated by him.

Thank you so much.

Yadoctora:
I dont feel good about this. I am not married and would not give consideration to a man I have this much differences with.

It is important to you that your family members respect this man. You can't force it, he'll have to earn it and you won't be there all the time to make him act right.

You need to agree on how to raise your children to avoid future problems.

My other concern is his mother. Will you want a MIL drama? the mama seems like one you will have a lot of explaining to do to.I Can't even fathom her asking you to cook on the first meeting. she probably was testing your skills and u'll av much more cooking to do for her.

The best thing is to marry someone u share a lot with. He will easily understand why you are doing what and your marriage can be more fun than hardwork.

Hi there, thank you for your thoughts on this, it's appreciated.

About his mum, I know, right? I was not really surprised she asked, he already explained things to me, he said it's not something I'll have to put up with as she won't really be in our lives, so I'm not to worry about it.

He really tries to do most things my way but I was worried because of the talks on people changing after marriage, I now understand things don't have to be done my way always so I'm compromising.

It's been made clear my family will treat him the way I do, so I'll be supportive of him and give them something to work with, hoping that they understand it, he is not a poor man so he won't have to always be in their face, people in my family have lives and everyone has a voice, so I'm sure that if he's really what I want without reservations, they will be onboard. I love him and I hope to work on myself too, he's just really nice and treats me right, even when we argue, he doesn't yell, I guess I just have to give back now. He and I will be seeing later today, I hope to discuss some more on certain issues with him.

This is really a huge step for me.

Thank you once again.

Preternatura1:
.

You are a very funny woman, I love your sense of humor.

No, his english is not bad but his accent isn't all that(i do know that I don't particularly speak english language like a briton would, yet somehow, people don't usually believe I was mostly bred in Nigeria) and I don't have much problem with this, I just kinda want my kids to not speak like him, he sometimes pick offense, when I try to correct him.

His Dressing is very much okay now, he listens to my advice on this some times but I'd like him to spend more on what he wears, he kinda complains about me spending "too much" money on stuffs,and doesn't see why I should buy label brand when I can get it somewhere cheaper, this doesn't really cause any problems as the money I spend is mine, I only take gifts from him

In the early stage of our relationship, I told him to stop buying things for me because I didn't really like the kinda things he bought, overtime he stepped up, but I feel he won't really continue this way after marriage now, having read most of the stories on how marriage changes people.

His Primary and secondary education was in the village, he was offered admission into college and moved to the city where he has remained. He knows how to drink from a champagne glass and his cutlery etiquette is okay but he would rather eat with only a spoon than with a fork/knife which is not really a problem for me, but what about my kids?

He travels but its usually for business and he doesn't stay long when he does.

It's not like I'm ashamed of him but I wouldn't like a situation where my family or friends will be asking why he needs to fill the glass to the brim or why he doesn't chew with his mouth closed, the first time he was in my house(dad's birthday), my niece asked him to please be quiet(he was on the phone laughing) because she was watching her show, he didn't find it funny, said the kid is spoilt and wouldn't take it lightly if his child did something like that, I tried to make him understand that it's not the way he saw it but he wouldn't take it. If I hadn't intervened when I noticed what happened, he probably would have scolded her and that wouldn't have ended well.

I met him on a plane, he was sitting next to me, he kept me company and somehow we ended up lovers.

I don't consider myself a vain or shallow person, I just don't want to encounter too much problems in my marriage.

My family doesn't know he's talking marriage as I've not told them, if I do and tell them my reservations, they'd mostly ask me to call it quits especially if I tell my sisters or mum his stand on the things I buy, that's mostly why I brought it here to get unbiased opinions.

He took me to meet his mum, she asked me to cook oha soup and I told her I don't know how to, she was shocked but he covered for me, she also had a problem with my gown(though he asked me to change before we left but I refused), I just want to make the right choice. To be honest, I just started feeling different ever since he started talking marriage seriously, I really want to do it right, before the talks started, I didn't even know if I wanted to get married.

Call it quits already. . Both of you are totally different, not on the same page at all...
●You like eating out but he prefers someone who can cook his meals..
●You prefer hiring people to do your chores, but he prefers a woman who can take care of chores.
● You prefer expensive and trendy stuffs but he thinks that wasteful.
● His accent doesn't match up to what you wish.
● You think a child shouldn't be flogged but he thinks otherwise.
●He's religious while you don't care so much about church.
● You don't like what he buys because they don't match up to what you wish.
● You don't like his dress sense.
●You both hold different views on how a child should be brought up.
● Your family may not like him
● His cutlery etiquette is bad, he fills the glass to the brim, he chews with his mouth open..
● He told you to change your gown, you refused.. Do you really think he would have ignored if you were married?

my dear, there's a lot at stake here, I really don't think any level of compromise can bring things to term..even if you compromise now, hope you can keep the compromise forever? ?.. All the best though..

preternatura1, As regards people changing after marriage, most people change either because
●they were pretending during courtship so their partner didn't really get to know their true being.
●situations also trigger change, maybe change in financial status, friends, partner's behaviour et al.

So, not everyone change after marriage, your man may not change.. But one thing I will always advice, if during courtship your man has attitudes you can't put up with, don't marry him thinking he will change cos that change may never come.... All the best once again..

Preternatura1:
Hi, you are free to address the issue from areas you choose, and thank you for your thoughtful input, it means alot.

Having read and pondered on the advice I've been given on here, I am genuinely willing to compromise, like I've been told, I have to realize we are from different backgrounds and bearing this in mind will help me(i sincerely hope).

I do have the fear of him changing like I've mentioned somewhere on this thread, I didn't really think too much on this because he has never been forceful with the way he thinks things should be done(he is soft spoken)till I started reading the stories here how people change after marriage, the things he has gotten me to do so far have been at my own pace, that's why I said he is very patient with me, I guess I just have to continue believing he won't change for the worse.

To be honest, I'm a little worried on the kids issue especially on discipline, he is not a mean person and he said only a beast will be happy seeing his kids hurt, that he will flog them only lovingly for the best, I myself have never been flogged by anyone(not that I remember)so I don't really understand it, he says I'm a good girl and not troublesome, perhaps that's why I didn't get beaten so he will only beat if it's very necessary, I guess I can live with this.

If I'm being totally honest, I must let you know that his etiquette has improved a great deal from when we first met, I just think it's taking longer than it should that's why I was worried but since most people here think we'll rub off on each other, would it be f00lish to hope for the best?

Most kids in my family are bred overseas and some are sent to school overseas, we are just a closely knit family that celebrate together alot,he and I are yet to reach an agreement on where ours will be raised, I hope this goes in my favor.

He has no problems with what I wear per se, he just said his mum wouldn't like it as it will be termed indecent by her, I refused because I didn't want to pretend. His mum is not really learned and he says she won't be in our lives, so I shouldn't be worried about her.

I know I might sound like I'm not really sure what I want but I'm sure he is a good man, I know no one is perfect, the truth is, is that I didn't really know much about other backgrounds till I met him, so I don't want to seem like a snob by writing him off, which is part of why I didn't go to my people for advice and why we came thus far, I was kinda fascinated by him.

Thank you so much.

The more I read you the more I lean towards you freeing this man
He will be very miserable in this marriage and so will you
He has a lot of grounds to cover
I don't see him meeting up with your demands let alone the demands of your extended family
He is not a good match
He will spend an entire lifetime from here on not being himself or stepping his foot down( which is what I suspect will happen eventually ) and be at loggerheads with everyone in your family.
This is not trial and error
Go your separate ways
There is a woman out there who will love him for him
You are hoping to love him for what you hope he will become
There is a man out there for you too

MarvellousGod:
Call it quits already. . Both of you are totally different, not on the same page at all...
●You like eating out but he prefers someone who can cook his meals..
●You prefer hiring people to do your chores, but he prefers a woman who can take care of chores.
● You prefer expensive and trendy stuffs but he thinks that wasteful.
● His accent doesn't match up to what you wish.
● You think a child shouldn't be flogged but he thinks otherwise.
●He's religious while you don't care so much about church.
● You don't like what he buys because they don't match up to what you wish.
● You don't like his dress sense.
●You both hold different views on how a child should be brought up.
● Your family may not like him
● His cutlery etiquette is bad, he fills the glass to the brim, he chews with his mouth open..
● He told you to change your gown, you refused.. Do you really think he would have ignored if you were married?

my dear, there's a lot at stake here, I really don't think any level of compromise can bring things to term..even if you compromise now, hope you can keep the compromise forever? ?.. All the best though..

I didn't even read you
This marriage is already headed for the rocks before it began

babyosisi:
You are hoping to love him for what you hope he will become.

Here lies everything, what if he never becomes what you wish? hope you will still treat him right?

gleatz:
Softysparkyy;
You got me laughing indeed. We might just be twins of the same opinion.
My dear, God is our strenght.

Hundred oen won't stop us from being givers. ##winks# its there lost dear.

Yes dear, we can't stop being us.
God will surely give us people that will appreciate us not the ones that will take advantage of our good hearts.

softysparky:
Yes dear, we can't stop being us.
God will surely give us people that will appreciate us not the ones that will take advantage of our good hearts.

Pic of ur good heart or wedonbilivit

Preternatura1:
Hi there, thank you for your thoughts on this, it's appreciated.
About his mum, I know, right? I was not really surprised she asked, he already explained things to me, he said it's not something I'll have to put up with as she won't really be in our lidves, so I'm not to worry about it.
He really tries to do most things my way but I was worried because of the talks on people changing after marriage, I now understand things don't have to be done my way always so I'm compromising.
It's been made clear my family will treat him the way I do, so I'll be supportive of him and give them something to work with, hoping that they understand it, he is not a poor man so he won't have to always be in their face, people in my family have a life and everyone has a voice, so I'm sure that if he's really what I want without reservations, they will be onboard. I love him and I hope to work on myself too, he's just really nice and treats me right, even when we argue, he doesn't yell, I guess I just have to give back now. He and I will be seeing later today, I hope to discuss some more on certain issues with him.
This is really a huge step for me.
Thank you once again.

Dont let any fear dampen your hope, discuss issues and your fears with him. It was the way it was because you didnt know what you know now thus was always making it your ways. Knowledge makes people do it differently right. You stand a better chance with this man than being always in fear like your sisters who married their class. Speak to him about your fears, watch him closely and pay attention to how he discussed them, you will know how genuine he is from this. Also make him open his fears about you, i think he has some too. The most important thing is that you both want to make a compromise now.

Tnks 2 all 4 ur advice. Fine he could change his smoking habit. He lied 2 me wen he ws asking me out abt his job, he lied 2 me that he ws in a particular company as an account officer, I latter found out he ws a driver to d auditor. Although wen he ws working he gave me all I needed, infact he do beg me 2 make request, bt am nt use 2 dat, he gives me weekly allowance. Unfortunately his boss ws transferred 2 ghana den he stopped working. His worried ws cos of me because he believe I might start looking else in which I never did. Fortunately he 4 us, he got anoda job ds month(driving). He also lied 2 me abt his qualification dat his an HND holder in which I latter discovered, infact am nt sure he completed his ND. And as for me, I had my ND, nd currently running my degree program. Truly he cater for me, he doesn't womanise, his faithful. Should I stil continue wit him, or leave him nd move on.

bonsue1118:
Tnks 2 all 4 ur advice. Fine he could change his smoking habit. He lied 2 me wen he ws asking me out abt his job, he lied 2 me that he ws in a particular company as an account officer, I latter found out he ws a driver to d auditor. Although wen he ws working he gave me all I needed, infact he do beg me 2 make request, bt am nt use 2 dat, he gives me weekly allowance. Unfortunately his boss ws transferred 2 ghana den he stopped working. His worried ws cos of me because he believe I might start looking else in which I never did. Fortunately he 4 us, he got anoda job ds month(driving). He also lied 2 me abt his qualification dat his an HND holder in which I latter discovered, infact am nt sure he completed his ND. And as for me, I had my ND, nd currently running my degree program. Truly he cater for me, he doesn't womanise, his faithful. Should I stil continue wit him, or leave him nd move on.

Why did you hide all this in your initial post
This kain lying suitor
Have you seen his John Thomas yet
Sure he has one?
Please run away from this man o

bonsue1118:
Tnks 2 all 4 ur advice. Fine he could change his smoking habit. He lied 2 me wen he ws asking me out abt his job, he lied 2 me that he ws in a particular company as an account officer, I latter found out he ws a driver to d auditor. Although wen he ws working he gave me all I needed, infact he do beg me 2 make request, bt am nt use 2 dat, he gives me weekly allowance. Unfortunately his boss ws transferred 2 ghana den he stopped working. His worried ws cos of me because he believe I might start looking else in which I never did. Fortunately he 4 us, he got anoda job ds month(driving). He also lied 2 me abt his qualification dat his an HND holder in which I latter discovered, infact am nt sure he completed his ND. And as for me, I had my ND, nd currently running my degree program. Truly he cater for me, he doesn't womanise, his faithful. Should I stil continue wit him, or leave him nd move on.

He's not just a smoker but a liar too?How many other things is he lying about?
Giving up smoking takes the willingness of the smoker and a lot of self-discipline.He may quit or not.Are you okay with a driver?Are you willing to go into marriage with a driver?
If he meets your standard,then continue with him.

thorpido:
He's not just a smoker but a liar too?How many other things is he lying about?
Giving up smoking takes the willingness of the smoker and a lot of self-discipline.He may quit or not.Are you okay with a driver?Are you willing to go into marriage with a driver?
If he meets your standard,then continue with him.

Nna na wa o
Now his smoking is an insignificant issue sef

babyosisi:
Nna na wa o
Now his smoking is an insignificant issue sef

Abi now.The smoking is even just a part.It's his integrity that is the bigger issue here.

Bonsue118,you say he doesn't womanise?Was that what he TOLD you?

babyosisi:
The more I read you the more I lean towards you freeing this man
He will be very miserable in this marriageable so will you
He has a lot of grounds to cover
I don't see him meeting up with your demands let alone the demands of your extended family
He is not a good match
He will spend an entirely lifetime from here on not being himself or stepping his foot down( which is what I suspect will happen eventually ) and be at loggerheads with everyone in your family.
This is not trial and error
Go your separate ways
There is a woman out there who will love him for him
You are hoping to love him for what you hope he will become
There is a man out there for you too

The man and her are the way they are because of their backgrounds, it was tougher before because she thought her way was the best. The good thing is, he is willing to make changes as she has made up her mind to. A man who goes ahead knowing who is mother is to warn her of the dress she is wearing and also protect her afterwards speaks volume, she just need to be sure he will always do this and she need to do same with her family. Even girls who marry their class have inlaw issues, the basic necessity is for a man to love and protect his woman always or would you rather she marry her class and be agitated always like her sisters. Love cut across class too as much as i understand the marrying your class thing. You know when i looked beyound the surface of the written background of ONEGAI on here, it is hard to believe she will offer the kind of advice she gave, but she learned through marriage. Pretenatural stands a better chance of working it before marriage and be sure of things. The major difference between a commoner and royalty is their background but love bring them together sometimes and it works with compromises and the likes.

bonsue1118:
Tnks 2 all 4 ur advice. Fine he could change his smoking habit. He lied 2 me wen he ws asking me out abt his job, he lied 2 me that he ws in a particular company as an account officer, I latter found out he ws a driver to d auditor. Although wen he ws working he gave me all I needed, infact he do beg me 2 make request, bt am nt use 2 dat, he gives me weekly allowance. Unfortunately his boss ws transferred 2 ghana den he stopped working. His worried ws cos of me because he believe I might start looking else in which I never did. Fortunately he 4 us, he got anoda job ds month(driving). He also lied 2 me abt his qualification dat his an HND holder in which I latter discovered, infact am nt sure he completed his ND. And as for me, I had my ND, nd currently running my degree program. Truly he cater for me, he doesn't womanise, his faithful. Should I stil continue wit him, or leave him nd move on.

My concern is that how can a driver afford to buy all these things and put someone on a weekly allowance?
I know that he wants to keep you by all means
Hope he wont do dodgy things after you are married
Sounds like he is biting more than he can chew
I hope he doesnt get you into trouble all in a bid to keep you
The lies are also rather big and scary too.

@babyosisi, he doesn't, av dated a guy dat womanise's for 4yrs nd I kno d characteristics of such man. If he those dat I wil kno.

Floodgater:
The man and her are the way they are because of their backgrounds, it was tougher before because she thought her way was the best. The good thing is, he is willing to make changes as she has made up her mind to. A man who goes ahead knowing who is mother is to warn her of the dress she is wearing and also protect her afterwards speaks volume, she just need to be sure he will always do this and she need to do same with her family. Even girls who marry their class have inlaw issues, the basic necessity is for a man to love and protect his woman always or would you rather she marry her class and be agitated always like her sisters. Love cut across class too as much as i understand the marrying your class thing. You know when i looked beyound the surface of the written background of ONEGAI on here, it is hard to believe she will offer the kind of advice she gave, but she learned through marriage. Pretenatural stands a better chance of working it before marriage and be sure of things. The major difference between a commoner and royalty is their background but love bring them together sometimes and it works with compromises and the likes.

Read over all her posts and look from the eyes of the man
The man doesn't have to deal with her only but her parents,nieces,nephews,cousins ,aunts and uncles
This will be a rough road
If this were my brother,I would want him to walk

Sincerely I don't think preternatura1 is a bad person,this is not just a good match for her

Liars shouldn't be trusted.
He will continue to lie to cover up other lies..

bonsue1118:
Tnks 2 all 4 ur advice. Fine he could change his smoking habit. He lied 2 me wen he ws asking me out abt his job, he lied 2 me that he ws in a particular company as an account officer, I latter found out he ws a driver to d auditor. Although wen he ws working he gave me all I needed, infact he do beg me 2 make request, bt am nt use 2 dat, he gives me weekly allowance. Unfortunately his boss ws transferred 2 ghana den he stopped working. His worried ws cos of me because he believe I might start looking else in which I never did. Fortunately he 4 us, he got anoda job ds month(driving). He also lied 2 me abt his qualification dat his an HND holder in which I latter discovered, infact am nt sure he completed his ND. And as for me, I had my ND, nd currently running my degree program. Truly he cater for me, he doesn't womanise, his faithful. Should I stil continue wit him, or leave him nd move on.

One thing. No relationship built on a foundation of lies can stand the test of time. Heads up.

babyosisi:
Nannymacphee I found you in my junk mail
Lol

hehe

babyosisi:
Why did you hide all this in your initial post
This kain lying suitor
Have you seen his John Thomas yet
Sure he has one?
Please run away from this man o

.

Chai babymama, u go kill me with laugh... lol @ Thomas John.....