5minsmadness:

Op has deactivated. I guess the shouting match didn't end very well.

pickabeau1:


How come i feel the story na wash

If it is true though..
meanwhile do you think her game is tight...although there is no indication he has cheated on her after the marriage

5minsmadness:
.
What do you mean by 'if her game is tight'? If it's the sex thing then no, i don't think so. If hubby really was the one in that video then it's possible he was having a last minute adventure before taking the ultimate step of "I do."

I think she' ll be making a mistake to leave the marriage... If the story is true.

tearoses:
Better late than never

Happy fathers day to fathers and fathers to be

5minsmadness:
.
What do you mean by 'if her game is tight'? If it's the sex thing then no, i don't think so. If hubby really was the one in that video then it's possible he was having a last minute adventure before taking the ultimate step of "I do."
I think she' ll be making a mistake to leave the marriage... If the story is true.

Kimoni:

Watched this 3 days ago. My kind of movie

bellong:


For Kimoni to like it, it must be a "no violence" movie

pickabeau1:


How come i feel the story na wash

If it is true though..
meanwhile do you think her game is tight...although there is no indication he has cheated on her after the marriage

njokusboy:


If it's true, I wonder why someone would bring such to nairaland, most women here have never experienced such, according to them, their husbands are next to Jesus christ, they don't even know how they might react if such happens to them, how can a blind man lead another.....

I don't know why people bring sensitive marital issues to this forum...

pickabeau1:



I wonder myself because they have perfect marriages

The lady even said she Is an old member..ny first red flag..
No old member has a cheating husband...or experienced infidelity at any stage of her marriage

That's why their first advice is ditch the cheat (first time sef) to the kerb
After all there are other men waiting for you to take you in, even with your kids

The story is a lie joor

People bring issues to get perspectives...

njokusboy:


If it's true, I wonder why someone would bring such to nairaland, most women here have never experienced such, according to them, their husbands are next to Jesus christ, they don't even know how they might react if such happens to them, how can a blind man lead another.....
I don't know why people bring sensitive marital issues to this forum...

edwife:


My sentiments exactly.I don't understand how can someone who has never been around a cheat or raised by such,will know what to do exactly.How can someone raised and surrounded by positivity only have negative advices and sermons about marriage?

Shouldn't such a person be more positive than negative?Why should i learn self defence when my life has never been in danger?if you know what i mean?

edwife:


My sentiments exactly.I don't understand how can someone who has never been around a cheat or raised by such,will know what to do exactly.How can someone raised and surrounded by positivity only have negative advices and sermons about marriage?

Shouldn't such a person be more positive than negative?Why should i learn self defence when my life has never been in danger?if you know what i mean?

edwife:


My sentiments exactly.I don't understand how can someone who has never been around a cheat or raised by such,will know what to do exactly.How can someone raised and surrounded by positivity only have negative advices and sermons about marriage?

Shouldn't such a person be more positive than negative?

Why should i learn self defence when my life has never been in danger?

if you know what i mean?

njokusboy:


If it's true, I wonder why someone would bring such to nairaland, most women here have never experienced such, according to them, their husbands are next to Jesus christ, they don't even know how they might react if such happens to them, how can a blind man lead another.....
I don't know why people bring sensitive marital issues to this forum...

edwife:

My sentiments exactly.I don't understand how can someone who has never been around a cheat or raised by such,will know what to do exactly.How can someone raised and surrounded by positivity only have negative advices and sermons about marriage?

Shouldn't such a person be more positive than negative? Why should i learn self defence when my life has never been in danger? if you know what i mean?

Ewuro4:


Hehe actually you're wrong. We have them here, they're just under radar. Have you ever seen a scorned individual boast of their experience?




as in ... @bold well except for leisure. I visit the shooting range for leisure and I love my freedom way too much to jeopardize it for mere squabbles.

Been married a while now and have no reason to question my man's motives. Loved , Respected and treated like a woman and I reciprocate same. Everyone's happy. Yes we fight and argue most times coz life will be boring without none. But
If one should take to heart any of these hate fest about Nigerian men on NL, hmm na gobe.

I read a thread and saw an angry poster quoted another lady. The other lady said something similar to your post Edwife, and the angry poster said and I quote 'you don't have a problem with being a second class? ' ... I then opened that angry posters' profile in another window to read her posts... She's being through a premeditated hell yet still stayed with so called rich monster man. People will treat you how you want to be treated.

So you're right, you just have to jump pass some threads when your resume's short of the area of discussion.

I leave you with Mariah Carey's .. Without You.

edwife:


I know right? That's why i said there is no need to fight when there is no war.You are right about leisure but that's is something you do once in a while and not as a duty.

I don't see how you will be a second class citizen in a house where there is mutual respect,understanding and most of all love.
I love cooking and i don't mind cooking for a man I love everyday if i can except when i am sick he can decide to cook or even order some takeaway.

All these equality talk is what baffles me.I was raised around men, 6 brothers and none of my bro treated us poorly; they cherished and were very protective(especially with boys) .Equality over what?who cooked today and who will tomorrow?who cleaned today?who went out today?who sleep most? ?

Unless you are married to a monster which i doubt any sane woman will stay with ,why the battle of sexes?
If we ask every married woman on NL if they married their best friend or the perfect man ,101% will say yes,so how can your best friend or perfect husband treat you as a second class?

crackhaus:

edwife:


I know right? That's why i said there is no need to fight when there is no war.You are right about leisure but that's is something you do once in a while and not as a duty.

I don't see how you will be a second class citizen in a house where there is mutual respect,understanding and most of all love.
I love cooking and i don't mind cooking for a man I love everyday if i can except when i am sick he can decide to cook or even order some takeaway.

All these equality talk is what baffles me.I was raised around men, 6 brothers and none of my bro treated us poorly; they cherished and were very protective(especially with boys) .Equality over what?who cooked today and who will tomorrow?who cleaned today?who went out today?who sleep most? ?

Unless you are married to a monster which i doubt any sane woman will stay with ,why the battle of sexes?
If we ask every married woman on NL if they married their best friend or the perfect man ,101% will say yes,so how can your best friend or perfect husband treat you as a second class?

Talon05:

She's amazing innit. When I'm ready for marriage, I'm gonna ask edwife to recommend a girl for me. She's a good woman. I found another like her today though "lovely(something)"

netotse:
Oga...you've been AWOL.....

netotse:
xx and Ajanlekoko
hey...there was this site you guys were discussing sometime back you could pay a token to talk to more experienced people, trying to remember the site, shopping for advice.

netotse:
@pickabeau1 and Ajanlekoko
hey...there was this site you guys were discussing sometime back you could pay a token to talk to more experienced people, trying to remember the site, shopping for advice.

AjanleKoko:


Why not just pay AjanleKoko directly

Not sure I remember what you're referring to sha.

AjanleKoko:


Why not just pay AjanleKoko directly

Not sure I remember what you're referring to sha.

netotse:
@kaboninc

AWOL?...nah, I switched off when you and that fellow started insulting each other on the subsidy thread...there wasn't anything for me to learn there...how's your end?

A marketing student has been convicted of assault after he bit a young woman on the bottom while they were having sex.
Samuel Price denied a common assault charge claiming it was with consent and he said he believed Elizabeth Sandlin, 20, was enjoying it.
He bit her to cheer her up, he said.
But Price, 24, was found guilty and placed on a 12-month community order under which he must carry out 40 hours unpaid work.
He was ordered to pay the woman £200 compensation and a total costs bill of £850.


The incident happened at his home in Higher Kinnerton near Chester in February after the couple had not seen each other for months because he had suffered a broken leg.
Flintshire Magistrates' Court at Mold heard how they had known each other for 18 months, became closer and went out on three dates and there was then a 12 month on-off relationship during which they were intimate.
Prosecutor Rhian Jackson said that they got on well, he was never violent towards her but the relationship came to an end when he broke his leg, although they kept in touch by text message.

On Valentine's Day they texted each other on a number of occasions - he was at a wedding and she was out with friends in Chester, and she then accepted his invitation to go around late at night because she missed the relationship they had.
When she arrived he kissed her and said he missed her.
"That made her feel happy because she had missed him as well," Mrs Jackson explained.

"She realised he was drunk and kept laughing for no reason and she described herself as tipsy.
"She hugged him, he picked her up, she hit her head on the kitchen door but accepted that was an accident.
"They went to the bedroom and she was happy for sexual activity to happen and lay down on the bed.
"He took a cover off his broken leg and threw it towards her - it hit her on the nose but she believed that was accidental too."
They kissed on the bed, took their clothes off and the prosecutor said the complainant consented to what occurred.

He started to bite her neck which hurt her and she told him to stop - but he continued to bite her.
"It carried on for a long time and she did not recall how many times he bit her," Mrs Jackson said.
He started to pull her hair, she believed he knew he was hurting her, and she became tearful fearing she would be injured.
She accepted that she could have left at any time but was scared that if she did he might have got angry.
It was then alleged that he took hold of her by the neck and was choking her.

She could not get him off her, said no and began to cough, and he let her go - but laughed as if it was a joke.

The prosecutor said that the woman now wanted to go to sleep but he continued pulling her hair and biting her, but there was no blood.

Upset, she went into the bathroom and cried, he said he did not mean to hurt her and they hugged.

He suggested that they go back to bed to go to sleep but once in bed he bit her to the leg and bum, leaving a mark.

To stop him she wrapped herself in the bed cover and he started to watch a film on his laptop.

When he slept she called a taxi at 4.15am and left 15 minutes later.

She was upset at what had happened and was crying and reported the matter to the police.
The prosecutor said that she regarded the defendant as a friend but felt he had no right to hurt her and she wanted him to understand that what he had done was wrong.
She did not seek medical attention but a photograph of her bruised thigh was shown to the court.
Arrested and interviewed, he confirmed that they had been in an eight-month relationship but they had not seen each other for six months.
That night he had seven pints at a wedding but was not drunk.

He believed that she consented to what was taking place and told how they had a physical sexual relationship, not an emotional one.

They had rough sex which he said involved biting and pulling hair between the two of them.

He had thrown his leg cover at her and expected her to catch it. He never meant it to hurt her.
They stripped and he bit her on the neck to turn her on, not to hurt her.
He denied biting her hard and said it was more of a nibble.
It was no more rough than normal - he was not out of control, he said.
"He said he thought she was enjoying it, she was moaning, and also biting him," the prosecutor explained.
The defendant showed scratches and bruises he had near his belly.

He agreed that he had pulled her hair and shaken her head from left to right but said he was not trying to hurt her.

She also pulled his hair, he said.
He had one hand on her neck, but did not choke her, and he said he did not recall her coughing.
She had not said anything to him and appeared happy, he claimed.
They hugged in the bathroom where she had been crying and they went back to bed - he agreed that he bit her on the bum saying he was trying to cheer her up.
But shown a photograph of the mark that was left, he said "bloody hell".
He said he did not think he had bitten her hard and had not intended to hurt her.

The defendant claimed that it had been a consensual injury during a sex session but he was convicted by magistrates.
In a victim impact statement, she said that she had since had trouble sleeping, she replayed the events in her mind, and had questioned her own actions, whether she had done something wrong.

It had left her feeling drained, confused and upset and questioned why she had been treated as she was?
He was someone she trusted, and the injury had left bruising which was visible and she had been off work because of stress.
The injury had stopped her going to the gym because she was conscious of the large bruise and she had been unable to go horse riding because it was painful.

She also felt her trust in men had been damaged and she was worried it may have an impact on any future relationships.
Damian Sabino, defending, said that both accepted that their relationship was based on sex.
He bit her, and pulled her hair, but she could have left at any time.
"Rough and playful sex was part of their relationship," said Mr Sabino.
He had been convicted of an assault and it may be "that on this occasion his perception was blurred and that he went too far."


Both had contradictory perceptions about what went on that night.
"She says she wants him to know that he has done wrong. He certainly does," he said.

"It appears that he went too far and he is certainly paying the price," Mr Sabino said.
But the case had no sadistic traits and the bite did not puncture the skin.
Both had injuries but hers were worse.
The defendant lived on the farm with his father and brothers, had attended Leicester University but the course was not for him and he was due to start a new university course in online marketing.
He was a decent young man, single at the moment, whose grandmother had just died and the funeral was due next week.