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I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused - Romance (5) - Nairaland

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Man Tries To Pacify His Unhappy Bride After Being Provoked At Their Wedding.PICS / Am Helpless...is It A Crime To Marry From Another Tribe / Dating A Guy Who Barely Calls Or Texts And Sometimes Ignore #Confused (2) (3) (4)

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Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by urchbarbie(f): 5:40pm On Sep 15, 2015
Djicemob:
There is nothing harmful in the chat snapshots,i dont know how you came to your baseless conclusions.Talking about bedduties and papers like you some type of saddist or doomsday prophetess. angry
keep talking. I av said my bits. u cant take dat away nor wipe it out of this thread. if dis line of convo comes up again, I still remain my stand in that which I av 'decoded' if that make u a saddist......be your own wicked guest. U lie low to help ur specie destroy a woman's life. biko si ebe a puo.........onye oje na abali
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by urchbarbie(f): 5:45pm On Sep 15, 2015
olukenzo:


Can't you see he's hurting her!? You said it yourself, he's acting like an irresponsible man.

And yes, his behaviour as she's explained, in my opinion, says he's using her for papers. This is more so if we choose not to ignore the "acting like a monkey to catch a monkey" talk.

You don't say? By your logic, it takes only a married person or a diasporan to detect an irresponsible man.

He's a married man, he should talk to his wife and share whatever frustration(s) he may be going through with her.
you are a responsible fellow. U dont coat d truth. its crystal clear clear d man's intentions. who quotes D monkey proverb without having an ulterior motive? God wld bless u and may u live long.

cityink , you should av known d man u live with. if he is suspicious in anyway, I wont hesitate to hand him over to d authority if he so kuch as scams u. No one shld be left alone to destroy ur happiness to gain his.
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by Djicemob: 5:48pm On Sep 15, 2015
urchbarbie:
keep talking. I av said my bits. u cant take dat away nor wipe it out of this thread. if dis line of convo comes up again, I still remain my stand in that which I av 'decoded' if that make u a saddist......be your own wicked guest. U lie low to help ur specie destroy a woman's life. biko si ebe a puo.........onye oje na abali
In the snapshot above,where did the OP's husband state that he was gonna fcck anybody or defraud anybody? Who says the monkey must exclusively apply in a situation when a guy is trying to scam a woman? Just say you dont understand the chats,dont come here with your stereo-typical every-guy-is-a-cheat-and-a-fraud bullsh1t.Yea i said it! You my friend,is talking bullsh1t,the size of china. embarassed angry
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by chigoizie7(m): 5:48pm On Sep 15, 2015
urchbarbie:
onye igbo. Ure just an unrepentant fellow. Ure one of such fellows who wld marry a 75 yrs old woman to achieve ur selfish desires. See d handwriting on d wall, I wont trade insults with you, I am way too cultured/learned to do so. For my parents, they av done dier best in teaching me to know wats right/wrong. I wont cover evil. Many of us wont paint d truth. I av said my bits on d matter. its left for d oyibo lady to make her decision.



Ok na, u don see chigozie wey be devil incarnate abi? Go back to thread,follow it carefully and see my stands.
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by Nobody: 5:56pm On Sep 15, 2015
Cityink:
Na de Journey

Can you post what was written before this? At least 2 snapshots before this. Here, you have his friend praising him for doing sth. It is not likely to be sth morally upright, because he goes further to call him a thief and says it is only God that can forgive him.

BTW, I hope you have his consent to go through his phone...?

1 Like

Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by Nobody: 6:00pm On Sep 15, 2015
urchbarbie:
you are a responsible fellow. U dont coat d truth. its crystal clear clear d man's intentions. who quotes D monkey proverb without having an ulterior motive? God wld bless u and may u live long.

cityink , you should av known d man u live with. if he is suspicious in anyway, I wont hesitate to hand him over to d authority if he so kuch as scams u. No one shld be left alone to destroy ur happiness to gain his.

People do evil these days and call it "hustle". By the time karma catches up with them they'd start crying.

1 Like

Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by urchbarbie(f): 6:05pm On Sep 15, 2015
olukenzo:


People do evil these days and call it "hustle". By the time karma catches up with them they'd start crying.
the thing is it always does.
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by Smeeky(m): 6:39pm On Sep 15, 2015
I am surprised you guys are still on this discussion.


Lady cityink,what do you really want to know about your husband based on the chat?
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by mrsmith11(m): 6:47pm On Sep 15, 2015
The Op is just looking for fault even when she has been told that the chat is harmless.

She doesn't trust the guy because he is an african

There white men here do worst and they still try to save there marriage but when it comes to black husband they keep listening to gossip from there white friends especially thos who don't like black guys and some people here are talking rubbish
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by 400billionman: 6:53pm On Sep 15, 2015
urchbarbie:
if the men that wld run away are ur like or dat d op has shown me, I wld rather die a spinster/nun. Marriage cant determine my happiness. keep f00ling urself Mr Man.

You are acting too suspicious. If I am bad in relationships I will tell you..
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by urchbarbie(f): 6:58pm On Sep 15, 2015
400billionman:


You are acting too suspicious. If I am bad in relationships I will tell you..
thats what d women who married peadophile's heard yet.........
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by 400billionman: 7:20pm On Sep 15, 2015
urchbarbie:
thats what d women who married peadophile's heard yet.........

You are breaking another woman's relationship thinking you are wise.

Suspicion is a first relationship breaker. Hope you read where the woman said he apologizes after acting weird. Yet all your interpretation is that he is a bad man who is bent on cheating her. An interpretation you coined after noticing she is a white woman.
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by urchbarbie(f): 7:25pm On Sep 15, 2015
400billionman:


You are breaking another woman's relationship thinking you are wise.

Suspicion is a first relationship breaker. Hope you read where the woman said he apologizes after acting weird. Yet all your interpretation is that he is a bad man who is bent on cheating her. An interpretation you coined after noticing she is a white woman.
U win. night don come, person need to sleep without fear of nightmares.
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by 400billionman: 7:26pm On Sep 15, 2015
urchbarbie:
U win. night don come, person need to sleep without fear of nightmares.

Now that I have won, what is my trophy ?
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by urchbarbie(f): 7:29pm On Sep 15, 2015
400billionman:


Now that I have won, what is my trophy ?
I wld dash u one fine Oyibo gal
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by 400billionman: 7:31pm On Sep 15, 2015
urchbarbie:
I wld dash u one fine Oyibo gal

I would rather have you.

You know what I want.
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by 400billionman: 7:40pm On Sep 15, 2015
Cityink:
I treat him very understandful and i try always. But he never tell me where he was...even he stay out of house over night!
He is whole time ugly, boring and selfish...just to get something like help or explanation or sex he is short nice & apologize for what he said or did day before...after he is in bad mood again
I dont know what to think about

Is he someone just want easy life

I will advise you not to crowd him. Give him space. Is he younger than you are ? Sometimes confront him gently telling him how you feel via text messages. Don't shout or snap at him. Don't act desperate or suspicious. Get busy with your own life and try making yourself happy with other things. There is a way you act and your partner starts asking himself questions that will get him back to his senses.

Finally, never act like a LOSER..

1 Like

Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by Nobody: 7:41pm On Sep 15, 2015
Sorry
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by urchbarbie(f): 7:52pm On Sep 15, 2015
400billionman:


I would rather have you.

You know what I want.
ure an impossible creature. U wld grey early with me, I promise u kiss
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by Smeeky(m): 8:11pm On Sep 15, 2015
wink
Cityink:
Sorry i just asked for translation of some pidgin text... I never wanted you to quarel becoise of my post. I thank you all e lot and i wish you all best! Take care and enjoy life
Bye 4 now
PS: the white 'men are not diffrent, dont worry, just they dont need papers, but they are often realy mad!
Good you understand the pidgin now.
whatever you decide is between yourself and your husband. We can only advice,you have the final decision to make.

Whitemen don't look for papers because they've gotten it as citizens,he hasn't and cannot exercise full citizenship right. If you love him like you said,help him get it. But if you want to hold him down because of that,its better you let him go. The hustle is real out there and he has families(dependent) to take care of down here.
No marriage is perfect, neither does anyone want a choking marriage. Talk to you husband,make things work right,love him against all odd,get to know his family,make babies for him(that is if you don't have already),make his conscience hunger for you. But be not be fooled by him.

You self try learn pidgin make u dey decode guyman slangs

wink
Cityink:
Sorry i just asked for translation of some pidgin text... I never wanted you to quarel becoise of my post. I thank you all e lot and i wish you all best! Take care and enjoy life
Bye 4 now
PS: the white 'men are not diffrent, dont worry, just they dont need papers, but they are often realy mad!
Good you understand the pidgin now.
whatever you decide is between yourself and your husband. We can only advice,you have the final decision to make.

Whitemen don't look for papers because they've gotten it as citizens,he hasn't and cannot exercise full citizenship right. If you love him like you said,help him get it. But if you want to hold him down because of that,its better you let him go. The hustle is real out there and he has families(dependent) to take care of down here.
No marriage is perfect, neither does anyone want a choking marriage. Talk to you husband,make things work right,love him against all odd,get to know his family,make babies for him(that is if you don't have already),make his conscience hunger for you. But be not be fooled by him.

You self try learn pidgin make u dey decode guyman slangs

1 Like

Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by Malcolmx12: 8:40pm On Sep 15, 2015
urchbarbie:
ure an impossible creature. U wld grey early with me, I promise u kiss
I pray I don't meet your type, you can even notice the OP avoided all your negative comment. holier than thou..... mtchewwww
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by Richy4(m): 8:59pm On Sep 15, 2015
The last thing I'm gonna say here is that this OP is the most insecure person I have ever met.

If you don't want him, let him go. Most of the people here have been telling you how harmless the conversation was but you keep wailing.

Do you want him to kiss your foot every morning when you wake up in the morning for you to be satisfied that he is now treating you right? You can just ask him. He may or may not do it but trust I believe is what strengthens a relationship.

I know it. If a foreigner is befriending a citizen with a clean mind or clear conscience. It is always he is using her for papers. If no one will tell you here, I will. Snuffing around his conversations and posting it on social media for a proof of his infidelity is not healthy.

If the reverse was the case, how are you gonna feel?
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by kaziblake(f): 9:02pm On Sep 15, 2015
Just trust ur husband and talk to him cos from d write up hmmmm
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by Nobody: 5:13am On Sep 16, 2015
No
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by urchbarbie(f): 5:35am On Sep 16, 2015
Malcolmx12:
I pray I don't meet your type, you can even notice the OP avoided all your negative comment. holier than thou..... mtchewwww
yw
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by Nobody: 5:45am On Sep 16, 2015
Its not so easy

1 Like

Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by samtol4(m): 5:56am On Sep 16, 2015
Cityink:
How are nigerian Men? I would love to understand him! Are black women knowing a better way with them? People often tell me, black People will never love white woman for real. They all want to marry one day a black woman...is this true? Is it just a question of time until he leave me?
The song "mother land" is nice and i know there is much truth in, but he always tell me there is nothing in 9ja making him feel going back! He even didnt want to travel to Lagos last X-mas. I said i pay all so he dont need to worry about his money, but he didnt want!?!

Do i have any chance
"black people never love white women for real"It is fallacy and erroneous just pray you meet the right black guy .My inlaw is happily married to an Irish woman for 15years now and the marriage is intact .There are bad people in all races weather white or black .The people you meet can make or mar you .

2 Likes

Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by Nobody: 6:01am On Sep 16, 2015
You are right
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by mrsmith11(m): 6:47am On Sep 16, 2015
Cityink:


Maybe you are right, i was thinking like this too, but as long he is locked and he dont talk to me...i dont know what to do
I tried to ignore him too, to go my way without him...but then he quarrel more AND it makes no sence for me too...if i do everything alone, if i ignore my partner, if i live just in the same flat but nothing more...then i dont need a realationship...because it is just hearting...it breaks up internally

I feel your pain because you want to make it work but it seems your husband is not making any effort.

Maybe there was a time he was communicating/passing a message to you sometime ago and you didn't understand or you ignored knowingly or unknowingly so he developed a resistance to you...(Just my opinion so I might be wrong)

So I will advice you ask him some questions that he should be truthful about it;

Does he still love you?
Does he want to make the relationship work?
Is he really comfortable with you frequent travelling?

Then finally......maybe you both should list out what you like about each other and things you don't like so each other improve on

I hope you understand my points
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by Nobody: 7:11am On Sep 16, 2015
We tryed
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by kingreign(m): 7:28am On Sep 16, 2015
Cityink:
Trying to list our problems more then one time...i write him any point of kritik, with include explaining What is wrong and why...but if i ask him what is wrong for him, he just say All. If i please him to give an example, so we could find a solution to change, he dont know what to say. Then he swear his love to me and he promise to change, to take responsibility and carry out its duties, to stop lying and to try beeing straight for the future...but its just working 1-2 days, then he is back in his old behaving.

Pls don't take this as an insult, I want to find out something here, this will be a basis for us here to know whats what and why you're going thru this challenge.
1. how old is your husband?
2. and how old are you?
3. Where did you meet him?
4. how long did you date him before marrying him?
5. how long have you two been married?


Answer this, as sincerely as you can and watch the truth unfold to us and you too.
Re: I Am So Unhappy, So Helpless & Confused by Nobody: 7:31am On Sep 16, 2015
Why

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